Hockey fans love a good debate. But ask them who the greatest player of all time is, and you typically won't get much of an argument: Wayne Gretzky will always be “The Great One.”
From a playing career that saw him smash virtually every scoring record in existence to off-ice success behind the bench and in the front office, Gretzky has been a class act and an ambassador for hockey.
January 26, 1979: On his eighteenth birthday, Gretzky signs a ten-year personal services contract with owner Peter Pocklington of the WHA's Edmonton Oilers. The deal makes Gretzky ineligible for that summer's NHL entry draft, marking the only known instance of the Oilers preventing a first overall pick.
December 30, 1981: Gretzky scores five goals against the Flyers, reaching the fifty-goal mark on the season in only 39 games to set a record that will surely be broken at some point in the future, assuming the league tweaks the rules to make each game three weeks long.
May 19, 1984: Gretzky wins his first Stanley Cup when the Oilers defeat a veteran Islanders team, causing a disappointed New York front office to acknowledge that it's probably time to get started on a quick thirty-year rebuilding plan.
July 17, 1988: After marrying Janet Jones in a million-dollar ceremony in Edmonton, Gretzky gets a bad feeling after noticing that every wedding gift from the Oilers' front office is luggage.
August 9, 1988: In one of the biggest trades in sports history, the Los Angeles Kings send Jimmy Carson, Martin Gelinas, three draft picks, and cash to the Oilers in exchange for Gretzky, Mike Krushelnyski, Marty McSorley, and a horribly awkward Saturday Night Live hosting spot to be named later.
October 15, 1989: Gretzky shows his flair for the dramatic when he breaks Gordie Howe's all-time scoring record with a goal in Edmonton, although some critics point out that doing it on a slap shot that first ricochets off Peter Pocklington's forehead in the owner's box seems like showing off.
February 25, 1991: Gretzky partners with Bruce McNall and John Candy to purchase the Toronto Argonauts, explaining that he wants to see what it would feel like to own a professional sports team besides the Calgary Flames.
May 19, 1993: Gretzky doesn't receive a penalty for high-sticking Toronto's Doug Gilmour in overtime, in an incident that your die-hard Maple Leafs fan friend admits he vaguely recalls hearing about way back when, before asking you to adjust the straps on his straightjacket.
February 27, 1996: Gretzky is traded to the St. Louis Blues and spends the next few months playing on a line with Brett Hull and scoring goals and getting assists and taking slap shots and … You know what? Nobody remembers this part of his career at all, so let's just move on.
July 21, 1996: Gretzky joins the New York Rangers as an unrestricted free agent, although he'll later admit he thought he was just signing up for a support group for people who recently had to endure the trauma of being coached by Mike Keenan.
April 18, 1999: Gretzky plays the last game of his career, waves to the crowd, then leaves the ice for the final time before turning to his teammates and saying, “Wait, why didn't anyone ever tell me I had one side of my jersey untucked this whole time?”
November 22, 1999: In unprecedented recognition of his remarkable career, the Hockey Hall of Fame is inducted into Wayne Gretzky.
February 18, 2002: Gretzky delivers his infamous Olympic rant in response to a question at a press conference, painting the Canadian team as the underdogs who the American fans and media are hoping to see fail. Gretzky later claims that the tirade was spontaneous, although many suspect the entire outburst was actually pre-planned, given that it came in response to the question “Um, excuse me, sir, but what are you doing at our luge press conference?”
November 22, 2003: Gretzky plays in his only old-timers event when he suits up for Edmonton in the Heritage Classic outdoor game, later admitting that he agreed to be surrounded by washed-up former Oilers one last time in an attempt to relive his years with the Rangers.
August 8, 2005: Gretzky is named head coach of the Phoenix Coyotes, and immediately reassures his players that even though he often scored over 200 points a season, he's pretty sure the team can still be competitive with the fourth liners only chipping in, like, 170.
February 12, 2010: As he slowly winds his way through the streets of Vancouver, Gretzky begins to wonder why the nice man who offered him a lift home from the Olympic Opening Ceremony insisted that he sit in the back seat of the pickup truck and hold a torch.