I sat on my bed for an hour before I gathered enough nerve to come to the shed tonight. I know Derek’s leaving, but I want him to remember what it felt like to be with someone who loved him unconditionally. I tell myself not to be emotional, to be happy that we could have this one last night together. I never imagined I’d fall so hard for someone, especially after knowing him for such a short time, but I have.
I never believed in love at first sight, until I met Derek. It’s all-consuming and delicious and wonderful and exciting. At the same time, it makes me nervous and self-conscious and emotional. Love exists. I know it does, because I’m madly, deeply, hopelessly in love.
Wrapping my arms around Derek’s neck, I feel his hands on my waist as he pulls me close. We kiss, and I open my mouth to deepen the intimacy. His tongue is lost in my mouth and mine in his.
“Once we start this, I’m not gonna want to stop,” he says in a hoarse, deep voice.
“Me neither.”
Without another word, I close my eyes while his fingers hook onto the bottom of my jersey, and slowly, tantalizingly, he slips the material over my sensitive skin and tosses it aside.
It’s dark. We can’t see anything, but I can hear the sexy rasp of his breathing and feel the slow, sensual feel of his hands on my skin.
I reach out and roam my fingers over the muscles of his biceps and trace the hard, solid lines of his perfect, defined abs and pecs. “I lied to you,” I tell him as my fingers move over the waistband of his shorts and follow the line of hair that leads downward.
“Mmm . . .’bout what?”
“I said I wasn’t affected or impressed by your body.” I kiss his neck and the musky scent of maleness envelops my senses. I move my kisses lower, to his chest, his abs, and lower. “I lied.”
He throws his head back, and his hand weaves into my hair as I show him how much I appreciate his body. From the ragged sound of his breathing I know he likes it. A lot.
“My turn,” he says in a strained voice after a while. I let out a surprised shriek when he scoops me up and has me sit on the empty new workbench in front of him.
He kisses me senseless and I move against him, wanting more, wanting him, wanting this night to last forever. Our bodies are slick with sweat now, and we’re both panting and struggling to make this last longer, but I sense we’re both holding on by a thin thread. My hands roam over his glorious body while I taste his mouth and he tastes mine.
He replaces his mouth with the tip of his forefinger, lightly moving it over my lips before dipping his finger inside my mouth so I can suck on it.
I lean back while he removes his finger from my mouth and moves it gently and passionately over my body. At some point his finger gets replaced by his mouth and tongue. When I feel his hot breath on my slick skin, my entire body tingles.
“You don’t know what you’re doing to me,” I pant.
“Yeah, I do,” he says in a hoarse, deep voice as he removes the rest of his clothes. I hear the rip of a condom wrapper and my body goes still.
“Did you get that from your wallet?” I ask him.
“Yeah.”
“I thought you didn’t carry a condom in your wallet.”
He chuckles, and I can imagine his lips are curved into a mischievous grin. “Secret compartment.”
I’m sitting on the edge of the workbench as he stands between my legs and slips on a condom.
I brace my hands on his chest. “Derek?”
“Yeah?” he says, his voice strained as he holds himself back.
I’m glad it’s dark, and he can’t see my face now, all hot and bothered and nervous. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”
He puts my hand on him so I can feel his arousal. “Obviously, you do.”
“No, I mean I’ve done stuff before . . . but not . . .”
“What? I had no idea.” He lets out a long, slow breath before placing his forehead against mine. “We don’t have to do this, Ashtyn. Your first time shouldn’t be in a shed.”
“I want to.” I hold his face in my hands. “I love you, Cowboy. Unconditionally. And this is the perfect place to do it . . . the place we first met. Nothing could be more special with you, right here. Right now.”
And so we do.
Derek takes it slow.
“You okay?” he asks as we move together. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
I’m so overwhelmed and so in the moment it’s hard for me to process it all. It’s like I’m in the middle of a dream and I don’t want to wake up. “Don’t worry about me,” I say in a soft whisper.
“I always worry about you, Ashtyn. I know you can take care of yourself . . .” He grabs my butt with his hands, urging my legs to wrap around him as he lifts me off the workbench. “But sometimes it’s way better when you let someone else take care of you. Come with me and let go of your inhibitions, Sugar Pie.”
I close my eyes while Derek takes over. He’s right. I’ve never felt so loved and cared for in my entire life. He’s so gentle and patient and knows just the right thing to do and suddenly I’m crying out his name and he cries out mine. I know this dream won’t last forever and a part of me will always want him as a permanent fixture in my life.
“You own a piece of me,” he murmurs as he holds me afterward.
“Good,” I tell him. “And just so you know . . . I’m never giving it back.”