Chapter Ten

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DARKNESS HAD DESCENDED BEFORE I gained consciousness.

I woke on the Oriental silk rug that my father had bought in Taiwan after buying the copyrights to an anti-aging serum made of rhino horn—one I obliterated from my pharmaceuticals the moment I took power.

Lights had come on automatically and snow fell softly outside—worlds away from my crystal sand and swaying palms.

No birds flew, making my heart pang for two parrots that’d been a part of my life for so many years.

That hurt.

So fucking much.

I wouldn’t be able to say goodbye to Pika or Skittles. I wouldn’t be able to explain to them why I never came home.

Home.

I had no heirs. No one to bequeath my islands and fortunes to.

I struggled into a slouched sitting position, careful not to twinge my leg.

My gaze fell on Eleanor. She lay across the room in a foetal pose. Her arms wrapped tight around her knees as if she dreamed of horrors. Her hair covered her shoulders like a coffee blanket, tendrils hiding her nipples and cleavage.

Her.

She was my heir.

She and Cal would inherit it all because they were the purest people I knew.

My to-do list before death had just increased.

Time is running out.

If you want her one last time...you better hurry.

Looking past Eleanor to Drake, I curled my fists. Still locked in the illusion, he sat stiff on the couch he’d tied Eleanor too. Sweat ran in rivulets off him, staining the embroidered settee with wetness. His skin was so white, his veins stood out like the wiring of a machine, criss-crossing blue veins and red arteries.

He panted short, tight breaths as if he fully believed he had no lungs to inflate.

He moaned and thrashed, his eyes tightly closed.

Blood trickled from his nose and ears, symptoms of his brain suffering aneurysms from what I’d done to him inside our shared hallucination.

Seeing him whole after watching his avatar be devoured made my need to hurt him billow again. I might have torn apart his mind. I might have turned him into a vegetable that he’d always mocked and reduced him to something I could uproot from my gardens in Lebah, but his body was still whole.

No bones had been broken; no physical punishment delivered.

Had I done enough? Or should I hurt his body as well as his soul?

A knock sounded, wrenching my head to the closed double doors. “Mr. Sinclair...Sullivan, not Drake. You alive?”

“Ye—” I choked and coughed, my voice returning to that of a mortal man instead of a fanged monster. “Yes, I’m alive. It’s done. I require your services.”

The door cracked open, and the leader of the mercenaries, hired from a firm I’d used in the past, entered. His black hair was slicked back, his goatee trim and precise, just like his aim. “What can we do?”

Two men trailed after him, staying back for commands.

Still on the floor, not willing to risk passing out again, I pointed past the Euphoria boxes to the defib on the couch beside Drake. “Do you know how to use one of those?”

The leader stepped closer, holstering his weapon when he saw Drake weaving and moaning, another trickle of blood seeping from his ears.

His lips twisted in disgust, a quick flicker of wariness at me for what I’d done, before he glanced at the medical bag and nodded. “The travel defibrillator. Yes, I was in the Army as a medic. I’m aware of how they work.”

“Good.” Holding out my hand, I barked, “Help me up.”

The leader marched to me, gritting his teeth against my proximity as he hauled me up onto one leg and passed me the cane from the floor. He shot a look at naked Eleanor sleeping on the carpet and back to nude Drake drooling with the occasional hiccupping sob. “What happened?”

“Nothing that didn’t need to happen.” Curling my hand around the smooth ball of the cane, I ordered, “Hook him up to the defib. Have one of your men sit beside him. The moment he shows signs of falling asleep, zap him. I want him to stay awake until I say so, got it?”

The leader nodded respectfully with a fair dose of wariness. “Consider it done.”

With the help of my cane, I limped toward Eleanor. Her skin puckered with goosebumps, and even in a drugged sleep, she shivered.

Unlike her nakedness, I still wore my clothing, fully aware that we weren’t in the tropics and even a heated house was not warm enough for long stints of nudity.

She needs a bed and covers.

Now.

Drake let out a guttural groan.

I narrowed my gaze, looking his way as he swayed and jerked as if something gnawed his bones. The mercenaries swallowed hard as more blood gushed from his ears, staining the sides of his face with crimson.

For hardened criminals with the taste of delivering death, they seemed unsettled with Drake’s condition. Afraid of a man who seemed intact, yet his brain dribbled over his shoulders like treacle.

“I do expect him to stay awake.” My voice resembled a drill, slow and merciless, puncturing their concerned fascination. “If you allow him to sleep, I will not be kind with my displeasure.”

Radcliffe, the leader of this merry band of murderers, nodded. “He will be kept awake. You have my word.”

“Good.” Pointing at the ancient armoire tucked against the wall, I ordered, “Inside you’ll find a blanket. Bring it to me.”

One of the men shot into action, ripping open the cupboard and pulling free a thick silver blanket. Carrying it to me, he waited while I did my best to duck and drape it over Eleanor.

I struggled with pain threatening to send me under again and the agonising need to protect her. I couldn’t bend. Couldn’t crouch. Couldn’t do a goddamn fucking thing.

Cursing my broken leg, hating my limited mobility, I eyed the men.

Goddammit.

I wanted to be the one to carry her to bed. I needed to be that man. To still show strength even in the shadow of my death. To hold her weight and cradle her while she slept. But...carrying her up the flight of marble stairs was an impossibility. Even climbing them myself wasn’t going to be doable.

Sighing hard, I pinched the bridge of my nose, doing my best to squeeze out the poisonous weakness inside me. “Someone will need to carry her.”

“I’ll do it.” Radcliffe volunteered, striding quickly as if understanding how fucking gut-wrenching this was for me. How much I wished I wasn’t a goddamn cripple.

Without a word, he tucked the blanket around her and scooped her naked form from the carpet. I ensured no part of her skin touched his and the blanket protected her decency before nodding stiffly. “A guest room is on this floor, toward the back of the house. Follow me.”

He nodded, waiting for me to hobble back to Drake and scoop up the abandoned cell phone beside him.

Drake mumbled something incoherent as another gush of blood dribbled out of his nose. He jerked as if something mauled him, followed by a thin scream. He trembled and hyperventilated, looking every bit a pitiful prey.

Enjoy your evening, brother.

Turning my back on him, I led the leader with Eleanor in his arms through the maze of wide artwork-adorned corridors. My pace was slow and laborious. My nervous system no longer able to ignore the shards of agony in my leg, ankle, and foot. The flesh wound from the harpoon had been demoted in terms of pain, and the consuming ache from broken bones made me snappish with fresh fury.

I wanted to be there when Eleanor woke.

I wanted to kiss her and love her and say goodbye without sweating with pain. I needed her one last time, and I’d be fucked if I let her remember sleeping with a broken man instead of the monster she’d fallen for.

“Tell one of your men to bring all the painkillers available in the house. Mrs. Bixel will show you where they are.”

“Of course,” the leader murmured, following me into the large guest suite decorated in muted blues and greys. The large king bed with its carved white headboard, looked out to the snow-dusted gardens. A sculpture of swans caught the moonlight. Snowflakes glittered like fallen stars from the heavens, catching in the deck lights.

“Place her on the bed.”

The mercenary did as I asked, lowering her carefully in the bundled blanket. Only once her weight had been completely transferred to the mattress did he let go and back away. “I’ll bring the painkillers as requested and keep Drake Sinclair awake. Is there anything else?”

I wobbled, clutching my cane for support. “No. Mrs. Bixel will arrange breakfast. For the rest of the night, I wish to be undisturbed with Ms. Grace.” I swallowed back another wash of pain. “I appreciate your meticulous work, Radcliffe.”

He bowed. “Appreciate the business, Sinclair.” Heading to the exit, he wrapped his hand around the doorknob. He looked over his shoulder, adding, “If you require protection for...” His gaze skittered to Eleanor before settling on back on mine. “You can set up a contract with us for a lifetime of cover, whether or not you are around.”

I hid my sneer. “That obvious, huh?” If the mercenary could taste my death, it meant I didn’t have much longer.

He shrugged. “Been in this business long enough to recognise the end.”

Hopping toward the bed, I nodded. “Keep her safe and do what she asks. Her word is your new law.”

“We’ll do whatever she asks and protect her at all costs.”

I hadn’t intended on gifting Eleanor an entire team of hired killers, but who better to keep her safe after I died? They would return her safely to Goddess Isles. They would do what I could not and ensure she went home.

Home.

Christ, I missed my sand, my sea, my sunshine.

The only way I’d be going home was in a body bag.

Shaking off my stinking self-pity, I caught his shrewd stare and cocked my chin at the door. “Thank you for your loyalty. My lawyer will be in touch.”

“Sleep well, Sinclair.” He left and closed the door.

The moment he was gone, I collapsed onto the mattress and pinched the bridge of my nose again. This time I added nails, driving into the cartilage, causing more pain because I had no way of bleeding out the agony.

Fuck!

Drake was dealt with.

Eleanor was safe.

My animals were safe.

Our future could’ve been...happy.

Rubbing my eyes, I removed my lenses and earbuds from Euphoria then repeated the process and freed Eleanor from hers. Looking at her, so vulnerable and worn out, I fought the indescribable urge to crawl under the blanket and hold her.

Happy.

I’d wanted that.

I’d wanted her to teach me how to embrace joy instead of justice.

But after what I’d done to Drake. And what I’d done to purchased women and rented souls... I doubted I’d ever see her again.

Certainly not in heaven and definitely not in reincarnation—if such realms existed. She was destined for wings. Either as an angel or as a bird—free to soar the skies.

Me?

I was destined for hellfire or the life of a creature that had to creep and crawl.

Stroking the delicate contour of her cheek, I sighed. I wish I deserved you.

Shadows crept over my vision, whispering of sleep and rest. My fingers tingled from touching her, the never-ending hum of our bond.

It would be so easy to slip. To sleep and gather my strength beside her, so I could say my physical goodbye, but...I still had one last thing to do before I could allow myself any final indulgences.

Pulling my phone from my pocket, I pulled up a new email and typed:

To: MurphyandCockran@law.com

From: S.Sinclair@goddessisles.com

Subject: New Will and Testament.

To Elliot,

It seems I have need of updating my Will and Testament. Please amend the bulk of my fortune to be gifted between Ms. Eleanor Grace and Mr. Calvin Moor. My islands are to be bequeathed to Ms. Eleanor Grace. Sinclair and Sinclair Group to Mr. Calvin Moor. The animal charities I have already donated to will receive fifteen percent of everything with the remaining stocks, shares, and savings to be split equally between the two individuals mentioned.

Ownership of my two caiques, Skittles and Pika, are hereby transferred to Ms. Eleanor Grace.

Please also include amendments to ensure Mr. Calvin Moor makes a two-million-dollar donation to Jessica Townsend, if she survives.

Please accept these new conditions as they are made while I am of sound body and mind.

Thank you for your services throughout the years.

Yours sincerely,

Sullivan Sinclair.

I pressed send.

Standing, I stripped my clothing, keeping my grunts of agony as quiet as I could.

Only once I was naked did I let down my guards and allow exhaustion to find me.

With the heaviest sigh of a man saying goodbye to everything he’d hoped to be worthy of, I slipped under the blanket and pulled Eleanor close.

I kissed her hair.

I inhaled her orchid and island scent.

I loved her.

I missed her.

I slept.