As expected, the Cottage Angels phone was ringing off the hook when Freya walked into the office on December 27th.
Central heating controllers had failed, loos had leaked, a guest’s gerbil had gnawed through a telephone cable (the gerbil hadn’t got the message it was a pet-free property) and a professor had called to complain that the wallpaper in his bedroom had given him a migraine and he wanted a full refund.
Freya embraced every call, rolling with punches that were easy to take compared to the emotional blow Travis had delivered. She threw herself in to solving the cock-ups for her guests so that she didn’t have to think about the mess in her own life.
The weather had clearly decided the festivities were over too. Strong winds and heavy rain blew in, melting the snow and filling the lake so it overspilled into the fields. The stream that had gurgled benignly through the centre of the village became an angry torrent, swollen by a myriad of tiny becks. The falls above the village tumbled in a foaming yellow cascade, more than earning their name of ‘sour milk’.
When Freya left the office on December 29th, the Christmas lights strung between the lampposts swung angrily in the wind. It was already half-past seven, and she was hoarse from being on the phone all day soothing ruffled feathers and cajoling busy tradespeople out to fix water leaks and dislodged slates.
Peak Perspectives skulked in darkness as she trudged past, reminding her of an empty shell, lifeless without the creative force of its owner.
Freya had never been gladder to slip into the warmth of Raffaello’s, where Roxanne had arranged to meet her for a pizza. Tanned and smiling, she was out of her seat to greet Freya the moment she reached the table.
‘Hello! I got a bottle of prosecco,’ she said, enveloping Freya in a cloud of warmth and exotic perfume. ‘Oh, I have missed you.’
‘I hope not. You were on your honeymoon!’
‘Yes, and it was completely amazing of course but we have been living together for four years and you can’t spend all your time in a bed or the hot tub or the couples’ hammock.’
‘Poor you. It sounds absolutely terrible.’ She allowed herself a smile.
‘It was awful,’ Roxanne said, unable to hide her grin while she poured a glass of fizz for Freya. ‘How have you been? How was your Christmas? I was a bit worried about you with your mum off on that cruise.’
‘Oh – OK.’
‘You weren’t on your own?’ Roxanne demanded anxiously, adding, ‘Sorry to sound like your mum.’
‘I was fine,’ Freya said. ‘And actually, I have news about Mum.’
After a calming glug of prosecco, she relayed the call about her mother’s wedding.
‘Wow. That’s a surprise … Or is it?’
‘Yes and no. The more I think about it, the more I should have seen it coming. I was taken aback at first, but I’ve had a bit of time to get used to it. They’re coming home next week.’
‘Let’s order and then, would you like to see some of the wedding photos? Don’t worry, I’ve edited them down to a few hundred.’
‘A few hundred? I definitely think we better order first,’ Freya said brightly, picking up a menu.
The earlier pictures at Roxanne’s house and in the church had all been taken by the original photographer. They were OK, with some nice shots of the bridesmaids having their makeup done and pretending to help Roxanne adjust her veil or hold her bouquet. The shots in the church were suitably impressive and brought back happy memories and a lump to her throat.
A picture popped up that was a blur of sky and frosted holly leaves.
‘Oh dear! That must have been when the guy fell off the wall. Good job he’s OK now,’ Roxanne said, swiftly swiping past it. ‘Now, these are the ones that Travis took.’
‘Are you pleased?’
‘I cried when I saw them. The others are good but these are so … real. I mean, he’s taken all the usual group shots and managed to make us look as if we weren’t shivering with cold, but the ones he took when we weren’t aware, are just so special. Look at this one of Ravi and me laughing when we were having a quick swig of whisky from the vicar’s emergency hip flask.’
‘It’s beautiful.’
‘My only complaint was that there weren’t many of you, other than the group shots. So I asked Travis if he had any more and he said he’d missed off a whole load by mistake and then he sent me through tons. They’re amazing. You look so gorgeous.’
‘I don’t think so!’
‘You do. I’m so glad I chose that colour because it sets off your skin and hair and – look at this close-up of you looking out over the lake while you held my bouquet. It’s a work of art, as if he could see what you were thinking.’
‘I doubt it.’ Freya laughed. ‘My stomach was rumbling and I was wishing I was inside with some mulled wine and a whole tray of canapes.’
‘You weren’t?’ Roxanne laughed. ‘Actually, so were we. Ravi was starving. I love these fun photos. There are some more here of the two of us giggling like schoolkids at the reception – and one of you dancing with Nico.’
‘What?’
‘You’re not looking at him though. You’re on another planet.’
It was true. The shot, from the side, showed Freya staring into the distance, her lips pressed together, while Nico leaned so close to her, you couldn’t have slotted a credit card between them.
‘I worked out you weren’t interested.’
‘I like him, he’s handsome – very – but not for me.’
‘Anyone seeing these would think you and Travis were – well, more than exes. No wonder he held these back.’
‘If he says it was a mistake, it was, I’m sure.’
Roxanne’s frown deepened and she said gently. ‘Freya, is there anything you want to tell me? Because, I haven’t said anything until now, but I did notice that you vanished before the end of the evening …’
Unable to hold back her feelings any longer, Freya held out her glass. ‘Top that up and I’ll try.’
Roxanne listened, sighed, sympathised and swore in all the right places before subsiding into a brief silence.
‘So, there you are. What a mess, eh? I rejected him when he asked me to marry him the first time.’
‘For very good reasons.’ Roxanne pointed out. ‘I knew there was something going on at the reception!’
‘Sorry, I didn’t plan on doing a disappearing act so early but it just happened. As for rejecting Travis first time round, I’m no longer sure it was for good reasons and it’s too late to change now. He comes back to Bannerdale and we get together and I issue an ultimatum of no emotional involvement.’
‘Which was never going to end well, honey …’
‘No … I thought it was the best way of dealing with things.’
Roxanne raised her eyebrows.
‘And so, I fell as much in love with him as ever and tried and failed to fight it so did what I thought was the brave thing and told him how I felt.’
‘It was the brave thing.’
‘But it ended in disaster. He doesn’t trust me anymore. I can’t say I blame him.’
‘And that’s it? How did it end?’
‘He left after Boxing Day afternoon and I haven’t seen him or heard from him since.’
‘You haven’t tried to contact him?’
‘No. I thought he needed time … now I’m too scared.’
‘You’re just going to give up, just like that? Proving his point that you’re not really that committed? Proving that hey, you’ve accepted it – life goes on. Are you hoping he’ll come begging at your door? Crawling on his knees to apologise and propose again?’
‘No, of course not! Shit.’ In gesticulating, Freya knocked her glass and prosecco spilled onto her jeans. The group at the next table stared at her.
Calmly, Roxanne handed over a serviette. ‘Here, mop it up with this.’
‘Thanks.’ She dabbed at her jeans, still jabbering about Travis. ‘I don’t expect him to turn up with armfuls of flowers and champagne. He’s too wary of me for that.’
‘Then somehow you’ll have to show him that he can trust you. He’s an intense and deep-feeling guy, who’s had to suppress his emotions for years in front of his awful father and while he had to take care of his family. Being teased at school must have been horrible and it’s no wonder he’s developed a thick shell. Underneath, he has and always will be crazy about you. He just needs to be confident you feel the same way.’
Freya threw up her hands in despair. ‘I don’t know how to make him do that.’
‘Start by not taking no for an answer. Start by telling him you need another chance to explain how you feel. He’s had time to think – he might be in a more receptive mood now.’
‘Hmm …’
‘Why not go round tonight?’
‘Because it’s late. I’m with you.’
Roxanne rolled her eyes. ‘In the flesh, maybe, but not in spirit. I want the whole Freya with me and you won’t be truly present until you sort things out with Travis – or at least, try your utmost to. I don’t know if he’ll open the door and drag you inside but you can at least give it a go. Take him by surprise …
‘I suppose I could …’
‘Great. Come on, let’s wolf down these pizzas – you look like you’re flaking out – and then I’ll walk with you to the cabin and you can do the rest.’
‘Faint heart never won fair Travis.’
‘What?’
‘Who dares wins.’ She thrust a menu under Freya’s nose. ‘Here’s the food. Eat and then you can go and risk it all.’
‘Damn. That’s a blow.’
Roxanne’s shoulders slumped in disappointment when Squirrel Cabin came in sight. It had been a wet and windy walk from Raffaello’s and a huge let-down when they’d finally found Squirrel Cabin in total darkness and no sign of Travis’s car.
‘It’s probably a sign that I shouldn’t be here.’
‘No, it’s a sign he’s gone to the pub. Hmm. You’ll have to try again first thing. Ambush him at dawn.’
Freya drove up to the track towards the cabin just before eight in the pre-dawn gloom. She hadn’t slept well but was determined to catch Travis before he opened the gallery. She could only hope he hadn’t set off early for a shoot but the weather forecast wasn’t great so she assumed not.
She wasn’t sure about ambushing him before work but only planned to stay long enough to persuade him to meet her later for a proper heart to heart.
That didn’t look like it was going to happen. Approaching the parking area, she could see that the cabin was still in darkness … but the curtains were still open, as they had been the night before, and there was still no car outside.
Maybe he had gone on a shoot.
Or had he had a heavy night at the pub, staggered into bed and was still asleep? Curiosity got the better of her, and she peered through the windows. Daylight was stealing in and she could just about see inside – what she did see shocked her.
‘Oh!’
The place was a tip. Clothes were strewn on the floor, and a half-eaten plate of food was on the coffee table next to an almost full glass of beer.
The thing that made her blood chill was the camera equipment and laptop, left on the sofa and chairs with no attempt to hide it.
It looked like the Mary Celeste.
Her first thought made her stomach squeeze unpleasantly. What if he’d had an accident and was lying somewhere within the cabin, injured – or worse? The sight of him after the electrical accident still hadn’t left her … but that was ridiculous. No one, not even Travis, could be electrocuted twice in one month.
However, he could – conceivably – have had a different kind of mishap, though God knew what in a tiny one-bedroom cabin. Someone might have broken in and harmed him but violent crime was unheard of in Bannerdale … and a burglar would surely have taken his laptop and camera gear …
Above all else, his car was gone, which pointed to him having left voluntarily – but why? He hadn’t gone on a shoot.
Could someone have forced him into his car for another reason? Driving him to the cashpoint for money?
Tearing her eyes from the window, Freya swore loudly. These dramatic imaginings weren’t helping. Her rational side told her that would be a perfectly reasonable explanation why Travis had vanished yet left his most precious possessions: like nipping to the garage for some milk and paracetamol.
Maybe she really wasn’t meant to try and persuade him how she felt, not yet at least. She strode back to the car, trying to laugh off her fears herself and manage the disappointment of finding him out again after she’d worked herself up all night.
A buzz from her phone made her jump then her heart beat faster, hoping it was Travis. Her spirits immediately sank when the screen revealed Mimi asking her to grab a fresh jar of coffee from the Co-op on her way into the office. Reminded that she had an actual job to do that should take priority over her tortured love life, she drove off to work and tried to knuckle down to the job.
The morning crawled by until she heard an agitated conversation in the reception area between Mimi and a man and woman. A few moments later, Mimi opened the door. ‘I’m sure he’s OK but of course, you can ask Freya if you think she can possibly help … you can leave the pushchair in the office here. I’ll keep an eye on Rosie while you talk to Freya,’ Mimi said, walking in, followed by Bree and Seb, who was wearing his work uniform.
In that second. Freya had the strangest sensation of the ground falling away from under her.
Seb’s agitated face and Bree’s anguished expression and them turning up at all at her workplace in the middle of the day could only mean one thing.
‘What’s happened to him?’ she burst out.
Mimi stared at her, totally oblivious to the fact that anything at all had been going on between Freya and Travis. ‘I’ll go keep an eye on the baby,’ she said, closing the office door behind her.
‘Nothing – we hope,’ Bree said. ‘Only we can’t raise him. He hasn’t turned up at the gallery, he’s not answering his mobile and the cabin looks like a bomb hit it.’
‘He hasn’t even taken his camera.’ Seb said. ‘Bree called me to say he hadn’t come into work so I went up there just now and saw the state of the place. His car’s gone so I phoned him and it went straight to voicemail.’
‘We’re worried,’ Bree said, clasping her hands together. ‘And we hoped you knew where he was,’
‘I – I’ve no idea. I went up to the cabin myself before work and saw the mess and his camera stuff there and the car gone. I thought he might have popped to the shops and would be back.’
‘Have you phoned him?’ Bree demanded.
‘No, I didn’t want to bother him.’
‘Have you two had another row?’ Bree shot back. ‘Have you upset him again? Have you caused him to take off again?’
‘Bree …’ Seb said, clearly embarrassed.
‘No, I haven’t,’ Freya said but realised that wasn’t entirely true.
‘Things aren’t right between you, though, are they? I warned him about getting involved with you again.’
‘Bree. This isn’t helping!’ Seb shouted. ‘And it’s not our business.’
‘It’s my business when my brother’s taken off without telling anyone again.’
‘Look, Travis and I – we were together, but it wasn’t serious.’
‘It seemed serious to me.’
Freya didn’t tell Bree that she’d overheard the baby monitor row. Things were bad enough. Even though she felt shaky and worried – and annoyed with Bree – it was her job to stay calm, especially with Mimi on the other side of the door.
‘I don’t think he’s been home all night,’ Seb said. ‘I haven’t been able to get hold of him since yesterday morning when he replied to a text. I just thought he was busy later but now I think he left sometime yesterday afternoon.’
‘But where?’ Bree wailed.
‘I don’t know but I swear I want to see Travis safe and home as much as you do,’ Freya replied. ‘I don’t know what I’d do without him.’