***

 

Twenty-seven days had passed from the day we left Antor. The ache never stopped, I just became more able to live with it. At least, so I thought until Rush flew through one of the windows open to the morning sun and landed on our breakfast table.

I stared at him and my heart started to pound. There was a letter fastened to the harness on his back. I could see the seal, the mountain ranges with the diamond overhead proclaiming it from Antor as much as its messenger did.

“Take it,” Rory urged. My parents, their two head stewards, the maids, and the runner all stared at the hawk as though it had flown out of a storybook.

But I could feel anxiety from Rush. “It's bad news,” I said quietly. My hands shook as I unlaced the harness and took out the letter. Andric's handwriting was unmistakable. The single word, “Kit”, was written across the front. With foreboding, I broken the seal and stared at the brief letter written in Andric's flowing hand. With each word, my heart slowed until it felt like it was barely beating. Tears came to my eyes.

“What's wrong?” Rory and Father demanded at the same time. Mother rose and stood behind me; her hands rubbed my arms in a soft, reassuring way.

“He's dead.” I stared at them in disbelief. “Andric's father is dead. He found his way to the roof and stepped off.” My tears spilled over as the image of the lost King came to my mind. I saw his son comforting him and promising that he would find his Queen again someday. 'He just couldn't wait for someday,' Andric said amid telltale tear splotches that disturbed the ink. 'He said that he could see her, then he stepped off before I could stop him. He was staring out at the ocean.' The writing became more faint. 'I couldn't reach him in time. I couldn't even save my own father.'

A sob escaped my throat and it became impossible to read on through my tears. I stood up quickly and my chair screeched in protest against the varnished wooden floor. “I've got to go to him. I should have been there.”

Father and Rory rose also with concern on their faces. Father tried to protest, but I wouldn't hear him. I turned back to Rush. “Tell him I'll be there soon,” I said and thought at the same time. The bird clicked his beak once, then lifted his great wings and vanished through the window as quickly as he had appeared. I felt the stares of everyone in the room and ran out before they could question me.

By the time I reached my rooms, full, harsh sobs tore at my chest. I pulled on the riding pants I had worn yesterday, a silk shirt, my boots, and my thick cloak. A sudden impulse made me grab my sword from where it hung on the back of the chair by my bed; it was comforting to strap it about my waist, a familiar weight to hold me down when all I could see was Andric's pain-filled handwriting.

I couldn't believe I had left him knowing all that he was going through. He held together an entire kingdom, filling them with a hope that was as full of pain as promise. He took care of everyone, his own father even, but no one took care of him. He blamed himself for everything that had happened. He had been lost at the end when I kissed him. I had seen it in his eyes, the defeat, the weight of his people looking to him for guidance, the fear of failure. What would he do now by himself and so truly alone?

A soft cough made me turn and stare. Father, Mother, and Rory stood in the doorway dressed as if ready to ride. At my wide eyes, Father nodded. “We're coming with you. It's about a week early yet, but preparations can be made to leave within the hour.”

“P-preparations?” I stammered out in confusion. “What preparations?”

Rory winked at me. “It's a long story; you'll hear it all on the ride.”

I shook my head wildly. “I can’t wait an hour. We've got to go now; it's too late already.”

Father held up his hands. “Alright, alright; the servants are already saddling the horses. I'll have Captain Rurisk follow behind with more men and supplies; they'll meet us at nightfall. Your mother will be leaving later; she's got more to prepare than we do.”

I looked at her, unable to comprehend what they were talking about. “Mother, you're coming?”

She nodded with obvious concern at my nearly hysterical tone. “It'll be better if we show you.” She put an arm around my shoulders and led me out of the room and down the stairs, Father and Rory right behind us.

We met Rurisk in the courtyard with a dozen men attired in Zalen blue and gold already standing by their saddled horses. Father went over to speak to him while Mother led me in the opposite direction.

Mother's greenhouses, her pride and joy created by Father so that she could grow her exotic plants in perfect temperatures, had been disassembled and were now being bound into manageable piles. I stared, but couldn’t understand what was going on. My mind was a whirlwind of chaos and emotion, and nothing sunk in past the intense need to reach Andric. “Mother, you're greenhouses,” was all I could say.

She smiled. “They're meant for a higher purpose than sheltering my prize roses. And we'll build more on a grander scheme when we get there.” She gave a truly girlish grin. “It'll give me the chance to make a few choice improvements that have been driving me nuts.”

“What higher purpose?” I asked.

“Taking care of your Antorans,” Rory said from behind me. He had his dark red horse, Ragen, and Breeze on lead ropes. Breeze nuzzled my shoulder, forcing me to rub his forehead. I obeyed numbly. “We're taking all of this there,” Rory continued. At my stare, he frowned and spoke slower. “Instead of a whole country running south, Father thought it would be better for us to bring what they needed to them.”

My mouth fell open. Father was the one who started this?

Rory laughed and handed me Breeze's reins. “You can stand there gaping like a fish, or you can lead this expedition.” He swung up onto his long-legged horse. “I'd recommend the latter.”

I gave Mother a quick hug with my mind still reeling from shock. She whispered for me to be safe, then I mounted Breeze and hurried to the front of the small group of soldiers that waited for us. Father saw the expression on my face and shook his head with a slightly embarrassed expression. “There'll be time for words later. We need to get going.”

I nodded and fell in behind him, hoping that eventually something would start to make sense.