Sexy Girls

THE SEXUAL

SEXY GIRL

What’s sex got to do with it?

The big question that everyone wants to ask is, How far is too far physically? How far can I go and still be “pure”? It’s a good question, one that would be good to figure out as we develop a new PR image for you. Because what you do is just as important as how you look in conveying to the world who you are and how you should be treated.

Over the past decade a lot of students have signed some kind of abstinence pledge, promising to stay pure until the day of their wedding. But the truth is that a lot of you signed the pledge because everyone else did too. I mean, what were you going to do, refuse to sign it and have everyone think you’re pro sex and anti-abstinence? So you went to the front of the room and made your pledge. You agreed to abstain from sex until marriage. And then the cute guy comes calling, or your guy friend wants to fool around just because you’re friends and why not, it’s not exactly sex…. The truth is that the abstinence pledge has done nothing to eliminate the sex play and sexually transmitted diseases that plague your generation. Before you say, “Oh, not me. I’m not guilty of anything. I’m totally sex free; I haven’t done anything against my pledge,” take a look at these sex games that might just be more sex than you bargained for.

It seems to be all the rage right now: “friends with benefits.” You’re such good friends, and so you totally trust each other. You spend all this time together, and neither of you has a significant other, so why not share a few innocent kisses or a mild make-out session? Who is it hurting? The answer is that it’s hurting you. It’s hurting your image, because now you look easy. You don’t need love to make out. You’re officially a plaything. And it’s hurting—no, staining—your purity. When you allow a friends-with-benefits relationship into your life, you lose a valuable part of you. You give away a little bit of yourself every time you fool around with a guy.

I know it seems like an emotionally safe choice, but the truth is that one of the two in the relationship always ends up feeling more than the other, and in the end the friendship suffers, as does the one who feels the most. It’s not a “no strings attached” relationship. As soon as the physical comes into it, there are strings. When one of the two of you gets a significant other, what happens then? Do the make-out sessions stop? Do you still hang out, minus the kissing? How do you think your boyfriend will feel if he finds out you’ve been fooling around with your best friend?

Face it, friends with benefits is a big lie. It’s one of satanic proportions. That means it’s straight from the devil’s mouth. He’s convinced you that your body and your sexuality are just for fun; they have no real significant spiritual purpose, so why not use them to your advantage? In the process he is destroying friendships and making it easier and easier for you to go farther and farther sexually, because you feel “safe.” And he’s doing all he can to subvert God’s law, which makes it clear that you are to abstain from sexual immorality, and that means anything that gives a hint of sexual immorality. Making out with a “friend” is devaluing your body and yourself. It’s making a game of something that is very special to your God. So don’t think that friends with benefits is your answer to your sexual frustration. It really is just the beginning.

A lot of good girls go bad when alcohol is involved. Time and time again, girls who wouldn’t normally fool around with a guy at a party are suddenly open to it when they drink a little. Alcohol taints the way you see the world. It’s another great tool of Satan to get you off track. But it’s no excuse for tainting your purity and falling into a make-out or sex session. Some girls plead ignorance or weakness—“I just didn’t realize what I was doing”—but that’s no excuse. It’s still immoral. And it’s still a slap in the face of the purity that God calls you to when you liquor up and then let happen what happens. Beware of drinking at parties. Beware of the guys who see this as an invitation to use you up.

When it comes to your PR package, adding drinking to the mix sends all the wrong signals. It lets guys know that what you stand for sober isn’t what you stand for drunk and that all bets are off. If you are a believer, they might even look at you as a juicier target because they will think you are untouched, untainted, and they love getting ahold of that. But it isn’t what you think. It isn’t true love. It isn’t romance. It isn’t something that could turn into something. It’s a guy using you for all you give and then walking away.

To ultimately answer this question, we have to look at God’s law and his words for us when it comes to our sexuality—how we dress and how we act. The guys we attract are ultimately the gage of our sexuality. If we lived in a world of all girls, heck, we could walk around naked and no one would care. But the truth is that guys just can’t handle the full force of our sexuality, and as children of God we need to consider what we are doing to others around us. If you want to know how far is too far, think about this verse:

You have heard that it was said, “You shall not commit adultery”; but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

Matthew 5:27–28

You can’t control the minds of the men you encounter, but you can help to alleviate the problems they have when looking at a sexy girl. Think about your wardrobe, the way you dress, and the things you do with your guy friend, and then ask yourself this: “Am I causing him to lust? Is he getting turned on by this?” If so, then you’re leading him to sin.

Don’t let God’s Word fall by the wayside. He is serious when he says that to even look at a girl and want to have sex with her is sinful. And he’s just as serious when he tells us that things go very badly for people who lead others to sin. Don’t allow yourself to be a tool of the enemy and to lead guys down the path of sinfulness. When you are getting dressed, consider how you look to guys. When you are alone with your guy, consider what you are doing to his sex drive, and stop before you get him revved up so much that he is lusting after you.

There are all kinds of ways to interpret “going too far.” And every person seems to have their own idea of how far is too far. But God’s Word makes it clear. Now it’s up to you. Will you find the loopholes and try to get around God’s law or will you take a long hard serious look at your sexual options and consider his thoughts on the matter? Whether it’s a system like friends with benefits or the lie of “the alcohol made me do it,” be careful which deception of the enemy you believe. If you can be honest with yourself about your sex life and God’s thoughts on it, you can create a much stronger PR campaign that will empower you to find the love of your life and not a “this’ll do in the meantime” kinda thing. Think it over. What kind of life do you want to live?