part0022

I replay the moment of the tackle in my head again, trying to sort through everything that just happened, while I sit in the locker room waiting for Max.

I was on the field, running the ball myself since none of my receivers were open, when out of nowhere, #96 barreled into me like a damn stampeding rhino. I hit the ground hard, banging my head against the field and causing me to see flashing stars in my vision.

That’s when I heard it—or, more accurately, her .

I heard my name crystal clear—in her voice—and turned my head to see Paige with that same worried look she always had when she came to my games in high school and watched me get hit.

But it couldn’t be her. Paige wasn’t in my life anymore. And she definitely wouldn’t be in the stands watching me play, although I’ve dreamed of that very thing more times than I can count.

I turned back and looked at the sky, blinking hard and trying to focus. I had to be hallucinating, but God, what a hallucination it had been. She looked so real and so good, I ached to hold her. My emotions were getting out of hand if I was starting to hallucinate images of Paige now.

The medics, trainers, and coaches crowded around me, asking me the standard questions to check if I was okay. The medics helped me sit up, but I kept my eyes focused on the ground, afraid that if I looked up, she wouldn’t be there. I needed to pull myself together and realize that it was just my mind’s wishful thinking. I must’ve been hit harder than I thought. I didn’t think I had a concussion, but hallucinations could be a symptom, right?

When I looked up, I was prepared—well, at least bracing myself to be prepared—for her to not actually be there. But she was there, holding her hands in front of her mouth, fear on her face. Her eyes met mine, and for the first time since I walked away from her at the airport in Chicago, everything felt right in the world. It was like a lock clicking into place. She was really here.

I couldn’t help the small smile that lifted my lips. I focused back on the medics who wanted to follow concussion protocol and take me into the locker room to be looked over. They helped me off the field, but I couldn’t stop myself from looking back once more. When I turned back toward the tunnel, I was more determined than ever to make things right. Seeing her confirmed everything I’d been feeling. I’ve never gotten over Paige, but more importantly, I never would, and I needed to win her back.

Max runs into the room. “Man, are you okay? That was one hell of a hit. How’s the head?”

The words rush from my lips as I stand up, still a little unsteady, and hold on to the table I’ve been sitting on.

“It’s fine. Max. I need you to get the woman in the second row, behind where Mitchell’s parents always sit. She’s a brunette, wearing a white top.”

Max responds cautiously, “Okaayyy. Um, Jack, I love ya, buddy, but I think what you really need right now is to rest. As much as I’m always down to help you have a little private meet and greet, now probably isn’t the best time.”

His eyes widen. Max knows all about Paige. He was one of the only people outside of high school who knew about my history with her, except that he knew more details than anyone else.

Max understands the significance that I am trying to convey in my tone.

“I need you to go get her and bring her to me. I have to talk to her.”

“Okay, I’m on it. Behind where Mitchell’s parents sit, you said?” he asks with urgency in his tone.

Without another word, he hurries out the door. I begin pacing around the room, worried that she won’t come, or that she’s left the stadium altogether, or worst of all, that she’s moved on and doesn’t miss me like I miss her. How the hell have I gone almost a decade without her?

It feels like an eternity before I hear footsteps nearing the room. My heart is racing, and I can feel my breath coming heavy. My uniform feels suffocating, and I grip the front of my jersey to pull it from my neck in an effort to stop the feeling that I’m choking. Max rounds the corner, his face looking cautious and worried. I glance behind him but see only an empty hall.

He shrugs. “I’m so sorry, man. I ran to that section, but I didn’t see anyone matching her description. I even shouted her name, but it looks like she left.”