I woke in my childhood room in the Citadel royal residence. My surroundings were so familiar, it was as though the last three years hadn’t happened and it was the morning of my First Ascension ceremony. I’d grown up here with the other noble daughters of the Northern Kingdoms, only visiting the palace on special occasions. For a moment, I closed my eyes and it all felt like a horrible dream, as though Morgana would walk in any moment to help me prepare for the celebration.
But deep in my bones, I felt every single moment of the last few years. My body ached as if I were a thousand years older, but none the wiser.
A fierce growl had me sitting upright, blinking the sleep from my eyes as a giant white cat leapt onto my bed.
“Pasha? Is that you?” I threw my arms around the huge white leopard giving me the stink eye. “I missed you, girl.” I scratched her behind the ears. “Don’t look at me like that, I couldn’t very well take you with me to the human realm. You would have scared everyone.” But the cat didn’t bother to hide her disdain for my excuses. “You got even bigger while I was away.” It hit me with a pang that she was no longer a young cat. “You’ve become quite the lady, haven’t you?”
Pasha bumped her shoulder against mine, finally releasing the purrs she’d held back. I could still see the feisty kit lurking in her eyes. My father had given me the rare white skýja leopard when I was fourteen, not long before he died. She was a tiny cub that had recently lost her mother. Skýja leopards lived far longer than most big cats. When I’d left at sixteen, she was two years old, graceful, and beautiful to be sure, but basically an overgrown kitten with a mischievous streak a mile wide.
“You know you’re not supposed to be on the furniture.” I pointed to the floor and Pasha hissed as she reluctantly obeyed, slinking out of the room to find breakfast.
“Good morning, child.” The regal voice sounded so much like Mother’s—like home—tears burned my eyes.
“Aunt Astrid.” I sat up on the edge of my bed, my back and shoulders throbbing with a bone-deep stiffness I knew wouldn’t fade any time soon. With so much traveling, followed by a battle, my injuries and aches had blended together, but they were catching up to me now. The Druid priestess had healed my damaged wing, but it would still be a long time before the soreness eased.
I met Astrid’s gaze and saw so much kindness there, shame for my cowardice overwhelmed me. Would I ever be able to look my family or my people in the eye and not feel such guilt?
“I didn’t mean for this to happen,” I managed in a strangled voice as I dropped my gaze to the floor. My excuses were beginning to sound like empty words even to my own ears.
“Of course you didn’t, sweetheart.” My aunt came to sit on the bed beside me, her presence warm and comforting.
“I was a coward.” I leaned my head against her shoulder.
“You have never been a coward a day in your life, Alithea Viktory Skuld Ahlstrom.”
I winced at the sound of all four of my names.
“There is a reason your mother named you after a first-generation Valkyrie.” Astrid stroked my back with a loving hand. “Skuld means ‘she who is becoming.’ Your mother always knew you would be her strong-willed daughter. I was so proud of you for leaving.”
I snapped my head up, looking at my aunt with surprise. “Proud? I ran away.”
A grim shadow flickered over her lovely face. “I imagine all our circumstances would be much different now if we’d learned to communicate better. You weren’t ready and you refused to blindly accept the traditions that sealed your fate before you were even born. We both know Brenna is a traditionalist, but she’s your mother, and she was just as proud of you for standing up for yourself as I was. Leaving wasn’t cowardice, Thea. It was so very brave. In the days after you left, we realized how little attention we had given your concerns. Darling, we left you no choice but to do something drastic. What came after—no one could have foreseen that, not even Sylvi.”
“Aunt Astrid … I don’t know how to fix this.” My shoulders slumped. I wanted to crawl back into the comfort of my bed and forget everything.
“From what I’ve heard, you’ve done a pretty remarkable job so far.”
“Thanks to Morgana,” I muttered.
“Yes, I’m sure she’s the one who freed all those Valkyrie soldiers ensnared in Neela’s Warder magic.” Aunt Astrid’s biting sarcasm brought a smile to my face.
“You heard?”
“Of course. We all have and it's the only thing anyone can talk about.”
Pressure seized my heart like it did when I was a young Queen Heir. The pressure of living up to the expectations of my people. And that was the one thing I didn’t want to talk about. “Tell me about Mother, please. Is she safe?”
“She is alive.” Astrid stood, avoiding my pleading gaze. “We have much to discuss, but you should eat first.” Crossing the room, she retrieved a silver breakfast tray. “I’m afraid it isn’t much. Rations are tight these days.” She set the tray in front of me.
I stared down at the small bowl of porridge and sliced fruit. A cup of weak tea, piping hot, accompanied the meager breakfast. “Rations? Has it really come to this?”
“We’ve been under siege for two years, Thea.” Astrid sank into the chair beside my bed with a weary sigh. “We’ve had to make do with what we have. For everything else, we’ve either gone without or learned how to make or steal it.”
I studied the bowl of porridge, losing whatever appetite I might have had.
“Eat, child. Don’t let it go to waste. I will fill you in on the details.”
I took a bite of the bland porridge, stirred with a hint of honey that was undoubtedly a precious commodity, and forced myself to swallow.
“On the morning after your First Ascension, when it became clear you’d fled to the mortal realm, the queen’s council met and our decision was unanimous. In your absence, the role of Queen Heir would naturally fall to Sylvi. Some didn’t like it, but we all believed you would return to your duty in time, and if you didn’t, Sylvi would be a fine ruler. Surely the power of the gods would recognize her in time, regardless of what we decided.
“Your mother fought to give you the time we should have offered you in the first place. She forced her council to see that you had every right to make your own decisions, claiming the fact that you’d taken such drastic measures to be heard was a testament to how strongly the council has held on to traditions that your generation no longer believes in.”
“She said that? My mother, the traditionalist queen?” I felt a surge of pride for my mother and my queen.
“When Brenhilde was your age, she did everything expected of her. And she was miserable for it. She didn’t rebel until she was much older.”
“Mother? No.” I shook my head. “I can’t imagine she would ever have it in her to rebel against the traditional roles of the Valkyrie Queens.”
“She defied the system in her own way, but that’s a story she’ll have to tell you. Eat, Thea. We don’t waste food here,” Astrid reminded me.
I took another bite of porridge with a slice of yellow fruit. It tasted like ash in my mouth. I wasn’t hungry, but I would finish every bite. “What about Mother’s bounty hunters?”
“She only wanted them to deliver a message to you.” Astrid studied the worn woolen shawl draped around her shoulders. “To let you know she understood and that you could come home whenever you wanted and things would be different.”
“I never stuck around long enough to hear that message.” I wondered how things might have been if I hadn’t run so fiercely from them.
“How did this happen, Aunt Astrid? How has Neela, of all people, managed to take the throne from our queen?” My mother was widely considered one of the strongest queens of our age. She was a powerful vessel, and under her rule the people of Valsgard had thrived. I couldn’t fathom a world where the daughter of a Warder could usurp the throne on Mother’s watch.
“It took us all by surprise.” Astrid shifted uncomfortably in her chair. “For the first few months after you left, everything was fine. It was a scandal, of course, and poor Fiske was beside himself in your absence. We didn’t know if we should start the consort process all over for Sylvi or if his betrothal to you should transfer to your sister instead—at least for the time being.”
I gasped in surprise. “I never dreamed she would be expected to marry him.” My throat grew tight. I was appalled by how much I’d overlooked in my rush to escape my own fate. Had I dumped everything I hated about becoming Queen Heir on my sister without a thought of what she wanted?
“It doesn’t matter now. At the time the scandal seemed like an enormous obstacle we’d never overcome. But then your Aunt Svana arrived with Neela. It was a homecoming we hadn’t expected, but it lifted everyone’s spirits—for a time. I hadn’t seen Svana in years and I hardly recognized her daughter. After my sister married King Ulric, she visited only a few times when Neela was a young girl. And they always arrived under heavy Warder escort.”
Astrid’s eyes filled with sorrow. “I remember Svana when Brenna and I were little girls.” She fumbled with the frayed hem of her sleeve. “She was such a strong, vibrant young woman and a fierce shield maiden. She just wasn’t a strong enough vessel as Mother needed in an heir.”
“I vaguely remember Aunt Svana,” I said. But to me she’d always seemed like a meek woman, scared of her own shadow.
“Her marriage changed her.”
“Neela was always kind enough when Sylvi and I were just kids,” I said. “If a bit standoffish.” The distant memory of my older cousin had come to mind often these last few days. Even though she wasn’t a Valkyrie, she was still family. As a Warder princess, she didn’t enjoy the kind of freedoms she would have had if her mother had married into any other kingdom.
The Warders were an unusual society, and they lived in a harsh land. Their women had few rights and privileges, and it was illegal for them to use their Warder magic without permission. For the first time I wondered how Aunt Svana had ever managed to adapt.
“Neela was a lovely girl when she was a child, but she is a grown woman now, with ambitions that surpass what she could achieve in her own kingdom. Her life among the Warders has hardened her. But we were so happy to welcome her and Svana home. There was even a ball to celebrate the joyous reunion of family.” Astrid let out a strangled breath, her gaze dropping to her hands in her lap. “It ended in bloodshed.”
“Bloodshed?” I shoved my empty tray aside, the food churning in my stomach.
“In the days leading up to the celebration, it became clear that Neela’s power was growing. That the power of the gods strengthened her. At the ball, she arrived wearing a beautiful gown. The garnet beads sparkled under the ballroom lights. It was a traditional royal gown like the Queen Heir would wear. Backless. Her brilliant red wings fanned out behind her like a blood-red cloak—all six of them. The crowd was speechless as Svana and Neela took their places of honor on either side of the queen. The council was furious. Svana never told us her half-Warder daughter was born a Valkyrie royal—a vessel. We all assumed Neela was like her father—more Warder than Valkyrie, as Svana was always weak. We never dreamed a child of hers could ever contend for the throne of Valsgard.
“What happened after her grand entrance?” I asked.
“Neela named herself Queen Heir and directed her men to seize your mother. The ballroom exploded in a battle to protect our queen, but Neela fought back with her Warder magic, trapping those who resisted her in a prison world of her making, and I imagine most of those poor souls are still there. Others she ensnared under her will, forcing them to serve her. The men she traveled with were prisoners she claimed were Warder guards her father had sent for protection.”
“Are you saying Neela is a Warder and a Valkyrie? A vessel?” I shivered at the very idea of that kind of power. As a Valkyrie royal, if she were strong enough, and it seemed like she was, she could become a Queen Heir. And like any queen or queen heir, she could siphon the power and hold it for others of the Nine Realms to use. This ability was what held our world together. When a Valkyrie Queen Heir ascended to the throne of the High Queen, she gave up any of her own magic she might have been born with, beyond the ability to shift. That was the only way she could contain the power of the gods. When she took the burden of power onto her shoulders, it burned through her magic.
My own magic allowed me to burn things, and see the magic of others. When … if I ever ascended the throne, I would probably lose that ability. Sylvi was a seer. If she ascended in my place, she would likely lose her sight.
Not many queens could hold onto their own magic while bearing the full brunt of the power of the gods. That Neela could seemingly do both was not a good omen for me.
“She is both, and she is ruthless,” Astrid said. “The ball was a bloodbath. Her men slaughtered anyone who stood against her. I remained in the Citadel that night, as my duty requires of me.”
“And Sylvi? How did she get away?” I asked.
“The council members closest to her grabbed her and all but dragged her into the Citadel. She was the next in line. They couldn’t get to Brenhilde, but they knew they could save Sylvi. The events of the night threw her into a prophetic state and she didn’t come quietly. It took her days to recover.”
When Sylvi had one of her episodes, her mind went somewhere else and her body was often uncooperative and sometimes violent. It was the main reason the council never saw her as a true contender for the throne—until I gave them no other choice.
“During the chaos, our people fled to the Citadel where they knew they would be safe. As foreign diplomats, neither Neela and her mother nor their soldiers could enter the Citadel without my permission.”
The magic of the Citadel Queen wouldn’t allow them to step foot inside the fortress.
“We’ve been here ever since.”
“How?” The Citadel was the lifeblood of the city, but I couldn’t imagine how they’d survived more than two years trapped inside the mountain.
“We had a few rough seasons, but we’ve learned to adapt. We have fresh water from the mountain falls that feed our fountains. Our emergency stores lasted us through the first year. We’ve since learned to grow our own food. We have hunting parties and blockade runners who bring us fresh meat and fish as often as they can. We’ve acclimated.”
“Acclimated?” I held my temper in check, but I wanted to lash out in my frustration with Neela. I knew Astrid and Sylvi had done the best they could, but they should never have been forced into such a situation. Really, I was angry with myself.
“We’ve been trapped here, Thea. In the early days, we tried to fight back, but we are too few in number. Neela rules through fear and ruthlessness, like a Warder Queen—if ever there was such a thing. Our citizens outside the Citadel’s protection are enslaved to her power and have no will of their own.”
“What was your plan, Astrid?” I stood to pace the length of my room. The long sleeping gown brushing my ankles felt strange to me after years of sleeping in comfortable t-shirts. I ran a frustrated hand through my hair. “What have you been doing the last two years?”
“Surviving, child. It’s taken everything we’ve had to keep our people fed and clothed. We haven’t had the resources to fight a battle we couldn’t hope to win. So we’ve opened the Citadel to all citizens who seek refuge from Neela and her vicious soldiers—whom we don’t want to kill because most of them are our people under her influence. Only those loyal to you, Sylvi, and your mother may pass through our gates.”
“So you’ve just been waiting?”
“Yes. Neela sent her bounty hunters after you and at first, we feared she would imprison you too, but you continued to evade her efforts, and we’ve cheered you on. In time, Sylvi collected her own bounty hunters. People from outside the city. She chose them carefully and sent them out months ago to find you and bring you home.”
“For what, Astrid? What am I supposed to do?”
“We’ve been waiting for you.” Astrid leaned toward me, hope shining through the sorrow and weariness in her eyes. “Thea, you are the true Queen Heir. The power will return to you in time, and when the scales tip in your favor, you can beat her. You are the only one who can save us.”
“But I’m not the Queen Heir.” I turned toward the window, gazing with unseeing eyes at the bright sunlight streaming in through the leaded glass panes. My shoulders slumped. “Not anymore. My magic has changed and my vessel is weak. I’m not as powerful as I once was and there’s a darkness there I’ve never felt before. Something I don’t understand. It’s like this … shadow has smothered the light of my magic. If you’ve been waiting for me to come back and save you, that’s not going to happen. She’s too strong. We may have to face the hard truth that Neela is now Queen Heir and we will have to come to some sort of truce with her.”
“You’ve been gone for three years and you’ve only been back a few days. We must give it time before we make such assumptions about the strength of your vessel. You left the realm when you were only sixteen. You were still maturing, your power still developing. Perhaps this difference you feel is simply a change you would have experienced as you came of age.”
“It feels like … tar tainting my soul. It’s not natural.”
“Sylvi will look into your aura and see if there’s any cause for worry. She’s an even more skilled seer now. And it has become clear to us all that she will be my heir. It’s why the power of the gods never chose her as your mother’s successor. She was already meant to be mine.”
“Sylvi will be Queen of the Citadel?” I couldn’t wrap my mind around the idea of my sweet, gentle sister as a warrior and shield maiden to the queen. To Neela, if something didn’t change soon.
“She is stronger than any of us have ever realized. She is the backbone of the resistance and the reason you are here now. She will be your right hand, Thea. And the two of you will bring the Nine Realms into a bright new future.”
“What about our mother?” I didn’t want to hear the details of the queen’s imprisonment at the hands of our enemy. I feared she might be dead and they were just afraid to tell me. The way Astrid spoke of the future, the queen didn’t seem to factor into her vision.
“She is alive. But only just. Neela has kept her enslaved, siphoning the power to within an inch of her life. She will never rise as queen again. If she even lives to see her child on the throne.”
My heart sank like a stone in my gut. This was all my fault. If I’d just married Fiske like I was supposed to, none of this would have happened.
“Where is she?” My spine went rigid. I wasn’t sure what I could do, but I refused to go down without a fight.
“The palace dungeons. She is far beyond our reach. But I don’t believe Neela will kill her. If she planned to, she would have done it by now. I believe she’s keeping her alive for Svana’s sake. Your mother and Svana were so close when Brenna was young. Svana doted on her baby sisters until Brenna was named Queen Heir and I became heir to the Citadel. Svana was the eldest, but she was the weakest of Mother’s children. When she was betrothed to King Ulric, it broke her heart. Mother used her as a diplomatic pawn on a chessboard. Her marriage to the Warder King bought an ally we sorely needed at the time, but Svana was discarded. Married to a man who didn’t love her. She should have been a queen, but among the Warders she is less than nothing in a realm that treats their women like slaves. I believe Svana still loves her sisters. But she’s had a lifetime of hate that has brought her to this. She is desperate to give her daughter a different life and she might be willing to sacrifice her sister and all our people to give it to her.”
The stone in my chest burned like a hot coal, igniting the power inside me. I was always a strong and skilled fighter, but the darkness welled within me now, feeding on my anger. Astrid’s voice faded to a din and I saw red.