The knock on his door was unexpected. He was lucky to have a room all to himself, while others had to share. Mathew loved his privacy. It was the only way he could be himself, and living with another guy, would have been a little too awkward. He checked the time. It was just after eight. He’d planned to do some reading, but that knock told him that that would be out of the question.
‘Hey!’ Chris stood with a wide grin.
‘Chris? What’s up?’ He couldn’t get over how cute that smile was.
‘Party time, that’s what’s up.’
‘Erm...I’m not really up for it.’
‘Well get in the mood for it,’ Jess suddenly showed up.
‘Where did you come from?’
‘I was just round the corner trying to convince my friend to join us.’
‘I see. Guys, I don’t think tonight’s the night for me.’
‘Yes it is, and we’re not taking a no for an answer.’ Sean appeared.
‘Not you,’ Jess rolled her eyes. ‘Where did you come from?’
‘You can’t go to a party, and think you’re going to leave me behind.’
Mathew knew he wasn’t going to win this one. Three against one was a pretty obvious result.
‘You’re coming dude!’ Sean already sounded drunk.
‘Well at least let me put on something. A better shirt at least. Give me a minute.’ He shut the door, and ran his hand through his hair. Two beautiful people were begging him to go to a party. It was crazy. But it wasn’t really, not for him. He’d always been the centre of attention. Just this time, he wanted to choose differently. He wanted Chris so bad, it was hard being so close to him. Jessica was great too, but his antenna was pointed at Chris.
‘Okay let’s go.’ He stepped out in his jeans, and light blue shirt with the top few buttons undone.
‘You look hot!’ Jessica didn’t hold back.
‘Thank you. You don’t look so bad yourself.’ He smiled.
The rest of the crew were quiet. The energy between them was awkward. Jessica clearly wanted Mathew, but Sean wanted Jessica. What did Chris want? He’d never responded to the question Mathew had asked him the day they’d met.
The party wasn’t too far away. Students were already drunk, already puking outside and doing their best to disrupt the peace. But this was how it was during university years. If they couldn’t do it then, when could they do it? They weren’t too young to party, and they weren’t too old to party either. These were the best years of their lives.
The music blasted from within the house. According to Chris, it belonged to two second year students. And they loved to party! If they could party every day of the week, they would.
They walked into the crowded house, it was in full swing. Student’s danced, drank, made out and probably had sex in the upstairs rooms.
‘This is wicked!’ Sean was in his zone. ‘Where’s the booze!’
A guy pointed him in the direction of the kitchen.
‘Thanks man!’ He shook the guy’s hand. ‘Can I get you a drink?’ he asked Jessica.
‘Don’t worry about me. I’ll sort myself out.’ She gazed briefly at Mathew, who had his hands in his pocket looking pretty comfortable. He didn’t feel the need to draw attention to himself, and by just being himself, he seemed to draw the attention.
‘Forget about him, you’ll have too many to compete with,’ Sean whispered in her ear.
‘I don’t care.’ She smiled.
Sean left them. Chris studied him too. He watched the way he looked over the crowd with such ease.
‘This is my song!’ Jessica squealed. ‘Come, dance with me.’ She pulled Mathew’s arm before he could protest.
Chris watched in the distance as Jessica danced with him. It was like she had possessed him. She had to have him, and it didn’t matter what anyone said. Mathew took it in his stride. He danced with her. He wouldn’t deny that she was an attractive woman. A woman he’d one day sleep with, but she wasn’t his number one interest. He had his mind on someone else.
He turned to where Chris stood watching them. Their eyes met. Mathew quickly looked back at his dancing partner. She was unaware of it all. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and made him dance. The gentleman he was, he wrapped his arms around her waist and gave her what she wanted. His attention.
After a moment, the music changed, they pulled apart, and danced separately.
‘I’m thirsty,’ she said. ‘I think I’ll go get us some drinks, unless of course you want to.’
‘Go ahead. I’ll wait here.’ He continued to dance.
The girl in the bright yellow dress disappeared into the crowds and headed for the kitchen. That was his cue. Chris walked briskly through the crowd, took Mathew’s hand and pulled him through the crowd, and out of the house. He turned the corner of the house where it was dark and no one in sight. Everything happened fast. One minute he was being dragged through the crowds, the next he felt the cold brick against his body, and the touch of Chris’s lips against his.
Chris planted his delicious lips against his. The lips that sent that gorgeous smile his way. The lips he wanted so much to taste. These lips were enclosed over his. His body fizzled. There was an explosion of fireworks within his body. He’d wanted this for so long. He wanted to feel another man’s lips on his. This was his first kiss. His first kiss from a man.
Inside the house, Jessica returned with the drinks. She stood on the dancefloor trying to find out where Mathew had got to.
‘Have you seen, Matt?’ she asked a random guy.
‘Who?’
‘Oh never mind!’
‘You lost him?’ Sean was by her side.
‘Leave me alone, Sean. I don’t want you.’
‘That maybe so, but Matt doesn’t want you either.’
‘How do you even know that?’
‘Well where the hell is he?’ he shouted over the music and loud crowd.
‘I don’t know.’ She felt upset.
‘See. Probably in the arms of another woman.’
She walked away from him. She wouldn’t let that happen. She liked him first.
‘Matt? Matt?’ she called out, drinks still in her hands.
Mathew was far away. His lips belonged to another. It was sweet and heavenly. He wanted nothing more than to touch Chris’s member.
Chris pulled back a moment, and ran his hand down the side of Mathew’s face.
‘Hey,’ said Mathew.
‘Hey.’ He stole a kiss.
‘How did you know?’ asked Mathew.
‘I didn’t. I took a chance. When I saw you looking at me the way you did in there, I just had to take a chance.’ He kissed him again, pulled on his lower lip teasingly.
‘I’m so glad you did.’ He breathed against him heavily.
‘Yeah me too.’ This time he pressed his lips against his and didn’t stop. He wanted to take the gorgeous hunk home!
‘Matt? Matt?’
‘Did you hear that?’ Chris pulled back.
‘Yeah.’
‘Matt, where are you?’
Mathew straightened up, and so did Chris.
‘Better get back,’ said Matthew.
‘Not before I do this.’ He brought Mathew’s face forward to meet his lips.
Mathew enjoyed the kisses, but the closer the calls came, the more he knew they couldn’t continue.
‘I can’t.’ He pushed him back. ‘Not right now.’ He gasped.
‘Matthew?’
‘I’m here.’ He walked from round the back and walked right into her.
‘Hey, where did you get to?’
‘Ah, Chris and I just went round the back to take a piss. Toilet too full.’ He winked at her, and took the plastic cup with the cheap booze in it.
‘You naughty boys,’ she said.
‘Yes, I’d say that.’ Chris looked at him. Only part of the light from the house shone on his face.
‘Come let’s go back inside. I still want to dance.’ She dragged him by the hand.
As he followed her, he turned behind him to catch a glimpse of Chris. He smiled, Chris returned the smile even though he wasn’t happy the way things had ended. Was Mathew ashamed of being with him? Or was it that he didn’t want Jessica to know? Whatever it was, he hoped Mathew would get over it soon. Chris wanted him, but he didn’t want him in secret. He wanted him in the open!
*****
As the night dragged on, Jessica wouldn’t let him out of her sight. It was as if she’d bought him, and now owned him. Chris drank and watched in the distance. There were a few women who had offered to dance with him, but he declined. As the night moved on, and he realised that Mathew wouldn’t be free from Jessica’s claws, he decided to call it a night. He put down the drink, and disappeared from the crowd. Mathew suddenly realised that the man he wanted was gone. What had he expected?
‘I’ve got to go.’ He pulled himself away from Jessica, and headed for the door.
Chris was nowhere to be seen.
‘I finally got your attention.’ Chris came out of the darkness.
‘It’s nothing like that.’
‘What is it then? I thought we connected.’
‘We did but –’
‘Matt...there you are.’ She was by his side again. ‘Are you walking me to my flat?’ she asked.
Mathew looked from Chris to Jess, and back again.
‘See you tomorrow.’ Chris walked off. He wasn’t prepared to be in competition.
‘So shall we?’ she held out her hand.
Did he have a choice?
‘What happened to Sean?’ He made small talk.
‘I don’t know. I don’t care either.’
‘Sounds like you don’t like him.’
‘It’s just something he said.’
‘What did he say?’ He was curious.
‘Something about me never having you. That you belonged to everyone.’
He laughed.
‘You find that funny?’
‘That’s so Sean. He likes you. Give him a break.’
‘But I don’t like him.’
‘I see.’ He already knew that.
‘I like someone else.’
He was silent. It was a confusing time. If she offered herself to him, he wouldn’t necessary deny it. It was just that he had a stronger pull towards Chris.
‘Don’t you want to know?’
‘Does it matter?’
‘Yes silly.’
‘I see.’
They kept walking towards her block of flats.
‘It’s you. I like you.’ She stopped.
‘I kinda figured.’ He smiled at her.
‘Don’t you like me?’ She looked at him worried.
‘It’s complicated.’
‘Complicated? How?’
‘I can’t explain it. Don’t take this the wrong way. I think you’re very attractive, but I’m not looking for a relationship. I had one for far too long during high school. Now I just want to see what happens. I want to date as many people as I can, without being trapped in a relationship.’
‘Hmmm, sounds good to me. Perhaps I could be your first experiment.’
He looked at her worried. ‘Have you hear a word I said?’
‘I did. And I think it’s great. I guess I’m not looking for anything serious either.’
‘That’s what girls always say, but it’s never the case.’
‘Well I’m saying it. I want you to be the one to break my virginity.’
He stopped a moment, the street light shone above them.
‘Don’t you want someone special to do the deed?’
‘Nope. I just want someone extremely gorgeous to do the deed. And that’s you. You are sexy and so delicious. I’d want you over and over.’
‘And that’s the problem. Once we’ve had sex, you won’t just walk away.’
‘I don’t want to. We could be friends with benefits. You can see anyone you like, and we could still sleep together.
She was driving a hard bargain. Easy sex whenever he wanted. It was hard to turn that down. It was something he’d think about.
‘Can I think about it?’
‘No. I want an answer tonight. In fact, I want you tonight.’
‘Not tonight. Perhaps another night. I’m shattered.’
She sighed disappointed. She couldn’t force him, and there was some hope that it might happen.
‘Fine. But I’ll only let you off if you go to the movies with me this weekend.’
‘See, you’re already acting like a girlfriend.’
‘No I’m not. You’ve let me down. You can make it up to me by taking me to the movies tomorrow.’
He put his hands in his pocket, and looked up at the light above him. She wasn’t going away, and he knew it. He could either go with it, and call it a night, or keep arguing about the issue, and lose out on sleep.
‘Pretty please?’
‘Fine. But after that, I’m not doing you anymore favours.’
‘But you still have to sleep with me. I really want you to break my virginity.’
‘I’ll have to think about it.’
‘Fine.’ She continued to walk.
They arrived at her block.
‘This is me.’
‘Goodnight, Jess.’ He drew forward to give her a kiss.
She accepted with delight. The touch of his lips against hers was magical. If only the girls could see this. They would be so jealous. He was on everyone’s lips. The popular guy, who didn’t seek out to be popular.
‘See you tomorrow.’ He withdrew.
‘Yeah see you tomorrow.’ She shrilled.
Like a gentleman, he waited until she was safely in the building.