Maddy rolled over in her vast bed as the maid came in with her morning chocolate. She felt quite deliciously decadent, having slept in until almost ten. She was to meet Will at the zoological gardens at midday, so she had time to luxuriate in the pleasure of a real bed and plenty of pillows. The past few days had flown by, too quickly as far as she was concerned. Will would have to return to Sun River tomorrow, and she was still uncertain whether he intended to take her with him. She prayed he would, but he was not an easy man to read. She was certain that he liked her, he enjoyed her company and did not seem to object to her more forcibly expressed opinions as so many men had done in her past. Yet, since that delightful moment at the train station when he had kissed every one of her fingertips he had not made any kind of physical gesture towards her.
She had to admit it was quite frustrating, as she most certainly would not rebuff his advances if he were to try. She had come here, resigned to the thought that she would marry him if he wanted her, that her own feelings for him did not really matter. Yet, from the very first she had been smitten with his deep brown eyes, slightly scruffy and overlong hair, and his tendency to worry about how everyone else around him was feeling. He was quick-witted, and funny yet his humor was self-deprecating and endearing. She wondered if he knew just how good a man he was.
Her breakfast completed, and a delightfully warm bath, scented with rose petals, later and she was ready to join him. She picked up her parasol, as the sun was hot, and walked slowly towards the gardens. A young bellboy from the hotel was her guide, and he delighted in pointing out the kinds of sights that only the young in a city like this ever get to know. She smiled at his eagerness and was happy to give him a dollar for his troubles as they reached the gates. Will was standing, his jacket slung casually over his shoulder, he turned and the glint of his pocket watch in the sun made her blink for a moment. “You look lovely,” he said softly as he took her hand.
“Thank you. So, what is on our itinerary today?” she asked, trying to hide the way that his innocent touch was making her feel. Just the sensation of his skin on her own was sending shivers through her, and when he bent to kiss her hand, she gasped as he turned the palm and kissed that, before closing her fingers over the spot, as if sealing it. It was intimate, a lovers kiss. She glanced around, wondering if anyone else had seen the look of pure ecstasy she was sure must have crossed her features. She blushed.
“Well, I have a date with the tigers,” he said, innocently as if he had missed every moment of her delight. She wanted to scream out loud, and beg him to see her, truly see her – to see that she was smitten, and longed for him to make her his wife. But she was too well bred, and so she kept her own counsel and tried to reconcile herself to the thought that tomorrow, this wonderful man might just walk out of her life forever.
As always he tucked her arm through his, and escorted her proudly to their destination. A keeper was awaiting them at the enclosure and he gave them the most interesting lecture on the big cats. If she hadn’t been so on edge, Maddy would have been utterly entranced, but she could barely drag her attention from the man by her side. “So, shall we go and see our newest acquisition?” the keeper asked. Startled, she looked at him completely confused.
“I’m sorry, I must have lost track. The heat,” she said vaguely.
“Mr Moss has a special treat for us,” Will said gently, as he urged her forward. Still feeling a little bewildered, she followed the stocky little keeper inside a nearby building. Inside she could see the cages that the beasts slept in at night. It was fascinating, and she could hardly believe her luck, that Will had arranged something so wonderful for her.
“This is Tilly,” Mr Moss said proudly as he stopped at a cage that seemed to have no access to the outside pen. “Isn’t she beautiful?” Maddy moved to his side and looked down, looking up at her was a tiger cub, with the biggest eyes she had ever seen.
“Oh my,” she gasped. Will moved up close beside her, slipping his arm around her waist.
“Isn’t she wonderful? Just look at the size of her paws!”
“Would you like to go in? She is due for her feed,” Mr Moss asked. Maddy was stunned. Surely this was a wild animal, they should not be allowed even near to her. “Don’t worry, she is quite harmless, is more than used to us keepers. Thinks I am her Mama!”
“She will let me feed her?”
“I think she would be more than happy to. Oh, and she likes having her nose scratched while she eats,” he added. Will grinned at her as Mr Moss led her into the enclosure. She looked at him, trepidation being outdone by excitement and interest as she knelt down and took the bottle and offered it to Tilly.
The little cub took it happily, clearly not worried in the slightest who was holding it. Mr Moss indicated that she should sit down on a box he brought her, and she did, her skirts spreading around her. Tilly lapped at her milk, occasionally batting at the bottle with her paws. She was strong, but gentle, and her claws were tightly sheathed. Soon she was climbing up into Maddy’s lap, and she was able to stroke her nose as Mr Moss had told her to do. It was soft and furry, like velvet. The cub chuffed gently in pleasure as she lay sated on Maddy’s lap, her bottle finished
It was magical; she could have cried it was such an incredible thing to have been able to experience. Whatever happened between herself and Will, she would never ever forget this – nor anything else they had enjoyed together over the past few days. He had gone out of his way to make every moment special, and she was overwhelmed by his generosity.
“We should leave her to sleep now,” Mr Moss said as he gently eased the young cub from Maddy’s lap and settled her into her straw bed.
“Thank you, for everything,” Maddy said ecstatically as they parted company with the kindly keeper, and let him go about his duties.
“It was my pleasure. Take care Will, best of luck,” he said enigmatically.
She and Will began to walk back through the park. “I have a feeling you know Mr Moss quite well,” she said to him.
“Indeed. He is my cousin,” Will admitted. “He was more than happy to do me a favor when I told him why I needed it.”
“And why was that?”
“Well, I have something to ask you, and I wanted to ensure you were in the best mood I could possibly manage.”
“That sounds quite ominous,” Maddy said with a rueful smile.
“I shall just come out and say it,” he said, fidgeting with his pocket watch, and barely meeting her eyes. She began to feel her fear rise once more, that he would not want her to accompany him back to Sun River - that all this had just been to make her trip worthwhile.
“Then do,” she said impatiently.
“Maddy, darling Maddy, will you marry me? I adore you, and want to spend the rest of my life with you!” he gushed.
Maddy could hardly believe her ears, he was saying everything she had been dreaming of, even before she had known how much she loved him, yet for some reason she could not answer. Her words got tangled up in her throat, and she found herself gasping for breath. “Maddy, please are you quite well?” he asked anxiously. “I would never have asked you if I did not think that you cared for me too. Please tell me I have not been a complete fool?”
“No, you have not. Could never be,” she finally managed to force out. “Will, I would be honored to marry you, cannot think of anything I could ever want more.”
She had barely caught her breath when he picked her up and whirled her around, clearly not caring for the stares of passing strangers. His face was alight with joy, and she could feel tears pricking in the back of her eyes as a lump formed in her throat. It had been so long since she had caused anyone to be so happy, and all because of her. “Shall we go and find a minister right now?” he asked her eagerly. “I do not wish to hurry you, but I cannot bear the thought of having to part with you, want you to come home with me tomorrow and do not wish to do anything to sully your reputation before I whisk you away.”
He set her down, and Maddy felt every bit of joy ebb from her body. He could never ruin her reputation, it was already in tatters and he did not know. She had not mentioned her reasons for searching for a husband once since they had met. She suddenly felt as if she had been lying to him, had been leading him on. Yet, she truly did adore him. She wished to be his wife because of that love, no longer because he was the answer to her dilemma. She could not continue to take advantage of this kind and generous man. She had to tell him, but how? It simply wasn’t something you could slip into a conversation that easily, and she had no clue as to whether he would understand.
But, could she consider taking the risk that he might never find out? Was that even fair? She wanted to be wed to him so very much, but how could she ever offer herself to him fully knowing of the secret she was keeping from him. News travelled quickly. She did not doubt that there was nowhere on earth where her disgrace would not catch up with her. But, was she selfish enough to take the happiness he was offering her now, and let what would come occur in its own time?
“Maddy? Whatever is the matter?” Will asked, concern written all over his face. “You have gone as white as a sheet! I shall escort you to the hotel immediately, you must rest. I shall send word of the arrangements for our marriage, if that is still what you wish?” She nodded, unable to speak – too scared of what she might say. “Come my darling, it is just the sun and the excitement that has left you overwrought. I cannot tell you how happy you have made me.” His words did nothing to assuage her guilt, only made it harder for her to ever admit the truth of her past, and her flight from Boston. But would he ever understand? Would any man?