— Chapter 4 —
The next morning, Oscar emptied his coin jar into his pockets. He hoped it would be enough for his plan. His pants jangled with pennies and nickels and dimes and quarters as he skipped happily to school. He slowed down and walked carefully over the cracked parts of the sidewalk. He tripped over these cracks at least once a week, and he didn’t want to spill any of the money.
As he came around the last corner before school, Oscar saw a group of older boys practicing skateboard tricks off the curb. They went to the same middle school as Gretchen, and Oscar sometimes saw them spraying words on fences with cans of paint. The shortest one was named Zach. He was in sixth grade, and he was a bully. Oscar knew all that from Gretchen, but he didn’t know how mean the kid was. He might be steal-his-money-and-run mean, or he might be hit-him-in-the-face mean.
Oscar kept his head down and walked slowly as he tried to figure out how to get past them. Should he cross the street to the other side and risk looking like he was scared of them? (He was, of course!) Or should he walk right by them and try to look as tough as possible? Whatever he did would draw attention.
He decided to try walking by them. As he approached, Oscar clenched his fists and tried to look mean. It didn’t work at all. He still looked like Oscar Schmidt, a not-remotely-mean third grader with too many freckles and hair that always stuck up in the back.
Zach noticed him first. “Hey, dude!” the older boy called. “Hey, I’m talking to YOU!”
Oscar felt a tiny bit of relief that Zach didn’t know his name. A few of the fourth graders at his school sometimes called him “Oscar Mayer” and made dumb jokes about hot dogs. Still, Oscar wasn’t sure how he should react. He knew smiling or saying, “Hey, dude,” back would only open him up to more teasing, so he ignored Zach and kept walking.
“Aw, he can’t talk, guys! Isn’t that sad?” Zach taunted. “He must have snot for brains. Poor snotbrain.”
The other boys laughed and started making snot jokes.
“Hey, when you blow your nose, do you get even stupider?”
“Hey, when you pick your nose, do you eat it, so it’ll go back in and you won’t get any dumber?”
Zach and his friends cackled and gave each other high fives.
Oscar’s face grew hot and his heart beat in his ears, but he kept walking. He was about to pass Zach when all of a sudden he fell flat on his face. One of the boys must have tripped him, because he had been watching his feet so carefully.
As Oscar hit the sidewalk, the change in his pockets spilled out and rolled everywhere. He tasted blood and felt tears welling up in his eyes. He was so afraid of drawing attention to himself that he didn’t even grunt “Gurf” when he fell.
“Whoa, check it out. Snotbrain is a piggy bank!” Zach shouted. He and the other boys all raced to grab the change off the ground.
Oscar felt his face get hot — he needed that money for his plan! He began to yell and kick his feet out in all directions. He hadn’t made that much noise in years, and he didn’t know where it had come from.
It must have surprised the boys too, because they backed away and started to laugh nervously.
“Whoa, there’s something seriously wrong with Snotbrain,” Zach said to his friends. “Better not touch his money, or you might catch whatever he has. C’mon guys, let’s get away from this loser.”
The bully dropped the coins he’d grabbed, and the others did the same. They grabbed their skateboards and headed off down the street together, laughing and punching each other’s shoulders.
Oscar pulled himself up on his hands and knees and frantically collected his money off the ground. Two dimes had fallen into a sewer grate, and he couldn’t reach them. His face burned in anger at Zach and the other boys, and his hands stung from hitting the sidewalk when he fell.
Stupid bullies. Stupid gravity.
After he’d gathered the coins, Oscar got to his feet and continued his walk to school. He tried to stop the hot tears that threatened to spill from his eyes. He decided to think about the caboose instead.
That worked. By the time he walked into his classroom, Oscar had a small, determined smile on his face. Even the bully, and the lost dimes, and the pain in his hands and chin couldn’t ruin his mood that morning. He was too excited about his plan.
* * *
Mrs. Faust showed them a video of astronauts on the moon. The men bounced gently along, seeming to walk in slow motion. Oscar stared at them with his mouth hanging open.
“What’s different about the surface of the moon?” Mrs. Faust asked. “Why do the astronauts move the way they do?”
Caitlin had all the answers again, but this time Oscar listened closely instead of rolling his eyes.
“Gravity is different on different planets… or moons,” Caitlin said. “There’s less gravity on the moon, so the astronauts are lighter there.”
“That’s right, Caitlin,” said Mrs. Faust.
Oscar stared out the window at the first graders, who were already having recess. Maybe I would trip and fall less on another planet with less gravity, he thought.
Just then, Asha poked him in the ribs to get his attention. Oscar jumped in his seat, startled, and some of the coins fell out of his pockets onto the floor. A few of his classmates laughed, but Mrs. Faust quieted them with a stern look.
Asha waited until he had retrieved the coins, then gently poked him again. “What are you doing after school?” she whispered.
Oscar thought for a moment. He wasn’t ready to share the caboose until he had opened it himself. He and Asha usually did everything together, and he didn’t want to hurt her feelings by not inviting her along. In this case, he decided it would be okay to tell a tiny lie.
“I have to go to the dentist,” he whispered back.
Asha made a face at him, but didn’t say anything else. Oscar hoped she wouldn’t notice him watching the clock, waiting for school to be over so he could put his plan into action.