What Qualifies Bouncing bet as a Weed?

•  First, its tenacity. Like the colonists who brought it here, it forms communities which endure through future generations. Ancient Roman baths fell into ruin centuries ago, yet even now it abounds near the sites where the Romans used it for bathing.

•  Second, its spread. Once started, it spreads aggressively by strong, quick-forming, perennial rootstocks that clone themselves to persist and resist easy removal, especially if ignored. Taproots extend into “rhizomes”, or stems that grow under ground. Rhizomes start new plants that in turn start new colonies, and even broken bits of rhizomes form new plants. Roots receive assistance in the reproductive process from profuse, though less effective, seeding. And so, near any single plant, usually dozens of young plantlings bounce up nearby to form dense colonies. I learned to spot it in the weed garden* by the impressive, hodge-podge profusion of its look-alike upstarts crowded near its labeled pot, flourishing in a wide variety of soil conditions. *The Long Island Horticultural Center of Cornell University in Riverhead, NY.

•  Third, its toxicity. The saponin that it contains, which provides sudsy soaps and foamy brews, also stupefies fish, and poisons animals. If consumed, it creates gastric distress, bursts red blood corpuscles, causes liver degeneration, muscle paralysis, and in great enough quantity, death. Normal drying and storage in fodder leaves poisons intact. Because of this toxic effect on grazers coupled with its spread and durability, even in alkaline soils, both Colorado and the U.K. rate it as a noxious or injurious weed.

Above: Bouncing bet in her bloomin’ youth, then… it goes to seed amidst the weeds and forms a large colony of clones

ANOTHER EXCEPTION

Many cultivars and useful plants have inconspicuous flowers.

•   Grasses have inconspicuous flowers. Grasses provide 80% of the world’s food supply, so surely Wheat, Rice, and Barley are not weeds.

•   The Trees we use to build our homes are not weeds, either, and many have greenish tiny blooms like Maples or blossoms that grow so high up that you need a telescope to see them, like Tulip poplars.

•   Again, inconspicuous flowers may or may not indicate weediness. This is just one more question that can help ascertain whether to let a plant be or to pull it out.

C. Does it smell or taste bad?

The roots of Poison hemlock, Conium maculatum, (Q#8) smell like urine in a mouse’s nest and the plant has been reputed to taste bad by those who survived a nibble. In the Nightshade, Solanum, family, Bittersweet nightshade, Solanum dulcamara, and Black henbane, Hyoscyamus niger, all smell foul which protects some potential foragers from eating them and absorbing their poisons.

Wild garlic, Allium vineale (Q#1) and Garlic mustard, Alliaria petiolata (Q#4) smell sulfuric and garlicky. But this can offer an advantage to cuisine.

EXCEPT

Gorgeous prized perennials, Frittilaria imperial and Cleome also smell awful—like skunk. Dutchman’s pipe, Aristolochia and Dragon Lily, Arum dracunculus smell like rotting meat, to attract pollinating flies. Some kids and even Presidents argue that nutritious Broccoli tastes bad. And crops like Garlic and Onions smell like the weedy Allium family plants. So yet again this is not a solo criterion.

Left: Frittilaria smell skunky even as bulbs Right: Cleome too smell skunky

D. Is it covered with spines,
hairs, thorns or sticky materials?

Brambles, like Blackberry, Rubus argutus; Thistles, like Perennial sowthistle, Sonchus arvensis, Canada thistle, Cirsium arvense, and Bull thistle, Cirsium vulgare; Composites like Devils beggarticks, Bidens frondosa and Common burdock, Arctium minus; and Briars like Roundleaf greenbriar, Smilax rotundifolia, all have painful sharp visible outgrowths that help them attach to passersby, or keep away tender-mouthed nibblers. Sometimes spiky growth is invisible to the naked eye, like the soft-looking hairs on Common mullein, Verbascum thapsus (Q#7) that resemble crossed spiky swords under the microscope and that can cause dermatitis. Few people want these weedy volunteers in their garden.

Bull thistle, Cirsium vulgare, displays a tall majestic glory in flower! Its purple flowerheads grow up to 2 ½ ” wide, composed of hundreds of soft, fragrant, vivid, tubular disc florets. In the movie Braveheart, the young hero, preserved a carefully pressed bloom, a gift his true love gave him when they were children. When he meets her and falls in love with her again years later in Scotland, he tenderly shows her his saved treasure. Romantic wildflower? Perhaps.

Above: Bull thistle bristles with thistles but also has large lovely blooms

It has weedy qualities like several other Thistles: it reproduces freely by seeds which fly far and wide, carried aloft by fuzzy parachute-like hairs or “pappus”; spines help it attach to passersby; it adapts easily; and arrived here without its bio-controls. It works as an allelopath, or inhibits the growth of other plants, as it emits phenolic acid and tolerates and encourages certain anaerobic bacteria and processes iron in a unique way. It frustrates ranchers as it gravitates to choice pastureland where its prickles help attach it to the hides of grazers. In sheep fur it slows down sheering. Herds not only spread its seeds hitched to their fur, but also encourage its survival as they avoid devouring it. This combination of allelopathy, ability for seeds to hitch rides, and ability to survive an onslaught by grazers helps it proliferate in pastures to outrival selected crops. It ranks as a noxious weed in Arkansas, Colorado, Iowa, Maryland, Minnesota, New Mexico, Oregon (where it is quarantined), Pennsylvania, and Washington. 24 of the 50 states it populates consider it invasive.

Sharply barbed Thistles became Scotland’s national emblem of independence and of retaliation. Thistles and Scotland have their own Latin motto “nemo me impune lacessit”, or “no one provokes me with impunity”. Perhaps this supremely spiny species of Thistle inspired the legend which dates back to any one of the many Norse invasions of Scotland between 945-1265. During Malcolm I of Scotland’s reign (943-954 A.D.), a time of violent recurrent battles, Vikings planned to cross a moat that guarded Staines castle. Before attacking the castle under cover of night, the Vikings removed their foot gear. The moat had dried out, Thistles pierced the Vikings’ bare feet, and the howls of the invaders roused the Scots, who woke to defeat them, and proclaimed Thistles a Viking repellent. Others view Thistles as symbolic of the Scotch dialect with its burr, or as a sign of the Scots’ supposedly fierce, hardy and prickly temperament.

Norse myth referred to it as the lightning plant and Thor, the thunder god protected it and any who wore it. In Greek myth, Earth grew Thistles after the loss of Daphnis, the gentle nymph who created pastoral music. The Bible comments on thistle as part of the curse visited on Adam and Eve when they ate the forbidden fruit in Genesis 3: 17-18: “17 And unto Adam he said, Because thou has hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life; 18 Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; (KJV)”

EXCEPT

Prized cultivars such as Roses, Sea holly, Cactus, and Bells of Ireland also have spiky prickles. Again, it’s a subjective matter that helps define a profile.