Chapter Nine
Akila
I forgot how hard house shopping was. Today, I looked at about ten houses and none to my liking. My last house was a three-bedroom. This time, I wanted a four-bedroom with a pool. I mean, he told me to get whatever I wanted, so that’s precisely what I’m doing. And I did get me a new whip. A 2018 Dodge Durango. It was definitely an upgrade for me, and I was loving it so far. After the first night of staying at his boy’s house, I decided it was best if I got a hotel room. I still wasn’t talking to Mari outside of getting the house. I could tell he was aggravated with me, but I didn’t give a fuck about how he was feeling. I was the one that was done wrong, and there’s no way I’ma let him feel like I did him wrong.
Each day that went by, I prayed and prayed for strength. I was tired of crying over him and thinking about that bitch and her baby . . . a baby that should’ve been mine in the first place. Of all the shit he did, this hurts the most. I really didn’t know how I would live with no job. I thought about getting a job, but I wasn’t going to work in no fast-food place. I just need to go ahead and wait until I graduate so I can get a better job.
* * *
It was my first day back in class, and I wasn’t enthusiastic about it. I was here ’cause I missed too many days and was too close to graduation to give up now. I was very distracted and tried my best to focus on what the instructor said. Suddenly, my phone buzzed. I picked it up and saw it was a text. I rolled my eyes before opening it. It was from Tyrone.
Hey, there, beautiful.
I smiled and looked at two seats across from me. He was sitting there looking sexy as ever. I smiled at him, trying my best not to let anyone see our interactions. A lot of these bitches were messy and loved other people’s business.
“Miss Jones, is there a problem?” the instructor said, embarrassing me.
“No, sir. Everything is good.” I put my head back into the textbook in front of me.
After getting called out, I was scared to look over at Tyrone. When class was over, I packed my books in my bag and grabbed my computer. I was about to walk out.
“Miss Jones, may I speak to you for a second?”
I turned around and walked to the instructor’s desk. “Miss Jones, I heard what happened to you, and I sympathize. But class is coming to an end. I need you to get focused and fast. Right now, your grades are struggling, and I’m afraid if you don’t bring them back up, you won’t be able to graduate.”
“I don’t know what you heard, but I got this. I will pass this class, and I will graduate.”
“Okay, Miss Jones. We have a test on Monday. I hope you’re ready.” He got up and walked toward me. He was so close that I could smell the stale coffee reeking off his breath.
“I will be. Is that all, ’cause I got to go?”
“Yes, that’s all. You know, if you need any kind of help, I’ll be more than happy to help you. One hand washes the other.”
I looked him dead in the eyes and spoke. “No disrespect, teach, but you’re an old-ass nigga with worms. There’s nothing on you I would like to scratch. Now, you better get the fuck up out of my face before I walk down the hall and report you for sexual misconduct.”
“Wow, wow. You’re getting above yourself. Not sure what you think I was talking about, but it was nothing sexual. I’m merely a teacher trying to help his student pass her class so she can graduate.”
“Yeah, right. I wonder how many of these bitches fucking you for a better grade.” I shook my head in disgust. Without saying another word, I walked out. I now know that someone was telling this school my damn business. Ughh. I can’t wait to finish up and get the hell away.
I was irritated that this nigga tried to make a pass at me with his old, stinking-breath ass. I don’t give a fuck how desperate I was to graduate. I would never let him touch me with a sixteen-foot pole. Ughh, just thinking about it turned my stomach.
I was so into my thoughts that I didn’t see Tyrone standing by the exit door.
“Hey, beautiful. I hope I didn’t get you in any trouble,” he smiled.
“No trouble at all,” I smiled back as he held the door, and I walked out.
“We need to talk, Akila.”
I stopped and looked at him. “What’s going on, Tyrone?”
I couldn’t deny how fine he was. I noticed he was growing his beard out, which kind of put him in a category of sexy and rugged. He also had those deep bedroom eyes that draw you in and pierce your soul.
“Akila, I know I’ve told you a million times how much I’m digging you. Shawty, I can’t get you off my mind. All I ask is for one chance to show you that I can be the man for you.”
“My life is so complicated right now that it wouldn’t be fair to bring you in it.”
“I’m a real nigga. I can handle whatever. All I ask you to do is give me a chance. If this is not what you want, then I’ll leave you alone, shawty.”
I stood there looking at him, and my heart was screaming out to him. His words sounded so genuine, and I wanted to reach out and touch his face. I searched my brain, looking for the right words to say. Before any words could get out, he took my head, and our lips locked. Our tongues danced together. We were in sync with each other as he drew me closer to him. I didn’t fight it. Matter of fact, I embraced it. Chills ran through my body, and my clit started tingling.
“Ewww, y’all go get a room,” one of our classmates joked as she walked by us.
I let go of his embrace and looked around, feeling slightly embarrassed.
“Wow. That was intense. You’re a great kisser,” he joked.
“Boy, you better stop before I get in trouble.” I started to walk away.
This was crazy. I shouldn’t have kissed him back. I hope no one else saw us because I would hate for Mari to hear some shit like this.
“So, you’re just going to leave like this? No goodbye or nothing?”
“Tyrone, I promise this is not what you want.” I continued walking away from him.
“Shawty, I promise I’ma make you mine.”
“Yeah, whatever,” I said before getting into my car.
I wasted no time on pulling out of the parking lot. I needed to get away from him. That kiss had me thinking all kinds of crazy ideas. This wasn’t right. I shouldn’t feel like this....
 
 
Heard you want a nigga that’s gon’ please you
Suck your toes, dick you down, please you
 
 
I stood in the mirror dancing and lotioning my body as I got dressed. Kevin Gates’s song was blasting through my speaker. I was feeling myself as I glanced at my body in the mirror. I was dressed in a skintight bodycon dress that I purchased from Angel Brinks. I took a glance at my ass. The way it stuck out in this dress was giving me life right now. I applied a little makeup with lip gloss and made my way out.
I was nervous but excited to see him. After he kissed me that day, I couldn’t get him off my mind, so I accepted his invite to dinner. I know I shouldn’t have, but I was lonely. Plus, I was feeling him and wanted to see what he was all about.
I got in my car, put his address in the GPS, and pulled off. I made sure to check my rearview mirror. Nothing looked suspicious, so I made my way to his house. He lived in Churchill by Thirty-Second Street. I wasn’t too familiar with Churchill and heard a lot of messed-up stories about that section. I thought he would take me to a restaurant, but he told me he wanted to cook for me. Shit, I was sold on that ’cause I’ve never had a nigga tell me he wants to cook. Most niggas would prefer to take you out to eat. So, he definitely made me feel special.
The GPS let me know the house was coming up on my right. I pulled over and spotted his car, so I parked behind it. I got out of my car and walked to the house with the address he had given me. Before I could get up the stairs, I saw him standing in the doorway.
“Hey, love,” he greeted me and gave me a big kiss.
This was starting to become so natural that I didn’t fight it. I kissed him back. We finally let go of each other and went inside his house. I was nosy, so I glanced around to see if there was anything that screamed a female was living there. I didn’t see anything visible. His place was clean and well put together.
“Come in here, shawty,” he instructed, taking my hand and leading me into the dining room.
The room was filled with the sweet aroma of delicious food. I looked at the table, and there was a little of everything on it. This reminded me of my grandma’s house during Thanksgiving when she was alive. I smiled as I took a seat.
“I have fried chicken, roast beef with stuffing, and red potatoes with macaroni.”
“Wow, you went all out. Let me get a little of everything.”
After he had dished out the dinner, we sat down and ate. I couldn’t help but think about him the entire time we were eating. His conversation wasn’t average. He was classy with a little bit of hood in him. That shit was sexy as fuck. The way I was feeling was like no other. I grabbed on to every word he spoke, yearning for more. This nigga was making me wet, even without touching me. Oh God, please, take this feeling away, I whispered inside.
“You a’ight, babes?” he asked me.
“Yeah, I’m good,” I quickly lied and straightened up real fast. I was scared that he might’ve picked up that I was being thirsty.
“What you want to drink? I got Grey Goose, Patrón, vodka, and pineapple juice.”
“Pineapple juice? What the fuck I look like? A little-ass girl? If you don’t pass that Grey Goose on the rocks . . .”
“That’s what the fuck I want to hear.”
We started drinking and smoking. I swear the alcohol had me feeling horny as fuck. He was fine, but with the effects of the alcohol, he was nothing short of that motherfucking nigga. He reached over to pull me toward him, and we started kissing again. Before you knew it, his hand was up my dress. He pulled out one of my breasts from my bra and massaged it. I threw one of my legs up on him and started grinding on him. I purposely didn’t wear no underwear, and juice was gushing out. I hoped I didn’t embarrass myself if the juice ran down my legs. He pulled me over on top of him. I threw my legs over and started grinding on his dick. It was still in his pants, but I could feel it.
“Ease up real quick.”
I eased my butt up as he pulled his jogging pants and boxers down to his ankles. His dick was a nice size and pretty as hell. I thought about starting to kiss it. However, I was horny as fuck, so I slowly eased down on his dick. My pussy was soaking wet, so it was easy to get his dick inside. Without mercy, I started riding him. I braced my body forward, resting my head on his shoulder while I scooted my ass in the air. I tightened my pussy muscles and rode his dick. I pretended like I was dancing in a video, moving around in circular motions. He grabbed my hips and winded up in me, hitting every inch of my pussy. I closed my eyes and just grinded on his dick. This fuck felt so good that I was hoping he didn’t come yet.
“Shit, damn, boo, this pussy so good. Oh shit, I want this pussy.” He grabbed me tighter.
I continue grinding down on his dick, flinging my ass up. While I was taking the dick, he thrust in and out of me. My body started to move in spasms. I sank my nails into his back as I tried to release everything. Then my legs started shaking as I busted all over his dick.
He picked me up and put me on the carpet. I threw my legs on his shoulders, and he entered me slowly. I grinded on his dick while he slow fucked me. Without warning, he started to fuck me harder. I wasn’t going to let him outdo me, so I threw the pussy on him, matching his strokes.
“Oh man, this pussy so good, boo,” he whispered in my ear.
That only boosted my ego. I totally forgot about the pain that I was feeling. I wrapped my hands around him and squeezed my pussy muscles on him. He started going faster, sweating hard and grunting out loud. Within seconds, he busted all up in me. He lay on top of me, holding me for a few seconds before getting up off me.
“Yo, shawty, you got some good pussy.”
“Your dick is bomb too, boo.” I had my eyes closed, trying to savor the moment. I’ve been with a lot of niggas before but having sex with him was so much better. It was more an emotional level—
“Don’t move, pussy.”
I know that voice. Wait, what the fuck was Mari doing in here? How did he get in this nigga’s house? I was too scared to open my eyes. Fear filled my soul, and my body started shaking. I wished I could just disappear right now. I was naked, and this nigga was naked, and my ex-nigga was standing over us.
“Who the fuck are you, and what you want, nigga?” Tyrone said.
“Pussy, I said don’t move. Try me, and I will blow yo’ fucking brains out in front of this bitch.” The venom in his voice was unmistakable.
“Mari, what the fuck you doing?” I finally opened my eyes and mustered up the courage to speak.
“Yo, shawty, you know this nigga?” He turned and looked at me.
“Yeah, nigga, you done fucked the wrong bitch.” He hit Tyrone in the head. Blood gushed out of the side of his head, and he fell to the ground.
“Get up, bitch.” He gritted hard on me while pointing the gun in my face.
“Mari, this isn’t what it seems. I can explain,” I started bawling.
The coldness in his eyes and how he looked at me let me know shit was about to get real up in here. I was looking for a way to get up out of here. I watched Mari. He was pacing back and forth, uttering some crazy shit under his breath while waving the gun. If I didn’t know this nigga, I would assume he was on drugs by the way he was behaving.
He walked back toward me, and I used my hand to hover over my head. He grabbed me by the hair and pulled me up. “Bitch, how could you do this to me? I gave you every fucking thing that you ever wanted, and this is how you repay me? I fuckin’ love you, Akila. How could you?” He smacked me in my face with the gun. Blood trickled down my cheek.
“Please, Mari, please, don’t do this. I love you, Mari. Please, stop,” I pleaded with everything in me.
“Bitch, you love me? How could you fuckin’ love me, but you over here being a slut for this ho-ass nigga? Huh? Please fucking explain this to me. Give me a fucking reason why I shouldn’t kill this fuck nigga and you.”
“Mari, baby, I swear nothing happened. I was just over here because I was hurting that you got that bitch pregnant. I don’t want him, boo, and he’s not interested in me like that.”
“I told yo’ ass I was sorry. I told you that bitch don’t mean shit to me. I fuckin’ love you. You the one that I want.”
I reached over and touched his face. “I know, baby. I should’ve listened to you. I’m sorry that I didn’t listen to you, babes, but we can get out of here together. We can get us a new house and start over.”
“I can’t do that. This pussy nigga took what’s rightfully mine. I can’t let it slide, B. You know who I am out in the streets. Niggas will laugh at me if they know a bitch-ass nigga fucked my bitch.”
“Baby, stop worrying about what people might say. I love you, and that’s all that matters. I don’t want him.”
I was desperate and trying to calm him down. One second it seemed like it was working, but then he looked over at Tyrone and got upset again.
“Bitch, get off him. I know what the fuck you trying to do. You just trying to save your little boyfriend.” He turned and pointed the gun at Tyrone. He was still lying on the floor, unconscious.
I jumped in front of him, putting my hand on his chest. “Stop, please. I will show you that I don’t give a fuck about him. I will shoot him myself.”
“You would do that for me to prove your love to me?” He looked me in the eyes.
I took a big gulp, wiped the tears away from my eyes, and looked at him. I had to make sure he believed me and had no doubts. “Baby, listen. From the first time I laid eyes on you, I loved you. I know I done said some things to you, but it was only ’cause I was scared of losing you. But I know you love me, and I love you too. I just want to show you how deep our bond is. Give me the gun, and let me show you, baby.”
I watched as he lowered the gun. I reached out and slowly took it out of his hand. I was shaking, but I tried with everything in me not to drop the weapon. I carefully took hold of the gun. I gripped it tight and looked over at Tyrone. I then looked back at this nigga . . . and I turned and pointed the gun at him.
“Yo, hold up. What the fuck you doing, B?”
“What the fuck it looks like? Put your fucking hands up, Mari,” I yelled, making sure he knew I wasn’t playing any kind of games with him.
“Bitch, are you fucking serious? Do you know what the fuck you doin’?”
“Yeah, I know what I’m doing and who the fuck you are. A lying piece of shit. I should’ve left you alone a long time ago.”
“You’re a stupid bitch. You ain’t got no balls to kill. Look at you. You fuckin’ shakin’,” he laughed.
I took a few steps toward him. “You sure you want to try me. I might not be a killer like you, but I damn sure ain’t scared to pull this motherfuckin’ trigger,” I yelled.
“Stop, babe. Don’t do it,” Tyrone’s faint voice whispered.
“Yeah, bitch, you better listen to yo’ little boyfriend. He seems to have more sense than you.”
“Tyrone, stay out of this. This nigga been beating my ass for years. I should’ve killed him a long time ago.”
“I know, baby, but you’re nothing like him. You’re not a killer.”
“Yeah, pussy, tell her.”
“Baby, listen to me. We can call the police and let them lock him up.”
I was torn. Here I was holding the gun on a nigga that I loved, and the nigga I’m falling for was beside me telling me to get him locked up. I really didn’t want to kill Mari, but I wanted him to feel the same kind of fear that I felt every time he jumped in my face. The funny thing was, he was a hard-core killer and showed no fear.
“Yo, you better get the fuck up out of here,” I yelled at him.
“Bitch, I promise you’re going to regret this,” he yelled as he dashed out the door.
“Babes, are you okay?” Tyrone said to me.
“Yeah. I’m so sorry about this. I’ll go with you to the station to make a report, but first, I need to get you to the hospital.”
“Nah, I’m straight. I’m just glad you’re okay. That nigga is crazy. I can’t see how you stayed with him that long.”
“Yeah, I don’t know either. Just know love will have you doing some crazy-ass shit.”
“That’s what I heard. Shit, if it’s that crazy, I don’t want it.”
“Can you let me clean up your wound? And I still think you need to go to the hospital.”
“I would go to the hospital, but a nigga ain’t got no insurance. But I got some peroxide in the cabinet.”
I was so angry that this had happened to him. This was all my fault. I knew how crazy Mari was. I should’ve never gotten involved with Tyrone. Now, his head had a big gash in it. I cleaned it up with peroxide and bandaged it up for him.
“Listen, baby, don’t feel guilty about none of this shit. This is not your fault. You had no way of knowing that nigga was a lunatic. Listen, you need to stay here with me. I don’t trust that he won’t hurt you if you go back to the hotel.”
I looked at him, and he made a valid point. I just went off on Mari, but I never thought it out thoroughly. He had a whole bunch of connects in the city, and if he wanted something done, it would be done. I took a seat on the sofa and buried my head in my hands.
 
Mari
 
How did I let that bitch play me like that? She was moving kind of funny, so I got one of my niggas to put a GPS on her car. At first, it was the regular: school, grocery store, and back to the hotel. I spotted her talking to this one nigga after school one day. Before she walked off, they started kissing. I was in rage seeing my ho kissing on a bitch-ass nigga. Now, I figured out why this bitch was so quick to walk away from me.
It was late evening, and I kept calling Akila, but she wasn’t answering the phone. I decided to stop by her hotel room to see what the fuck her problem was. I was about to exit the rental I was driving when I saw her walking out of the hotel. I could tell this wasn’t no grocery run ’cause of the way she was dressed like a slut. I waited until she pulled out of the parking lot, and then I followed her. The stupid bitch didn’t even take time to look behind her. If she did, she would’ve caught me following her.
I watched with venom in my eyes as she and this fuck nigga hugged before they disappeared behind closed doors. I spotted a couple of neighbors out in their yard, so I decided to sit still until no one was around. The last thing I need is for one of these nosy motherfuckers to report some shit. I lit me a blunt while I sat waiting. Blood was boiling in my veins. The moment was now. Everyone seemed to disappear, and the darkness quickly appeared. I got out of the car and slowly crept up the stairs. I tried the door, but it was locked. I looked around, trying to figure out a way into the house. I crept back down the stairs and made my way to the back of the building. There was an old staircase that seemed like it was ready to fall apart, but that didn’t sway me away. I held on and barely put my weight down. I know I would be hurt physically if this feeble structure fell apart. I got to the stairs and tried the door that was also locked. There was a window to my right. I reached over and pushed it up. Shit, this was my lucky day. I climbed over and got in. I looked around and saw the kitchen light was off. I made my way to the front. Then I grabbed my gun and held it as I crept through darkness. I was careful to keep my ears open.
I inched closer to a bedroom. Silently, I leaned my ear against the wall. My blood pressure elevated as I heard Akila’s voice. They were so into each other that they didn’t hear when I entered the room.
I pressed my gun against the nigga as I looked at my bitch lying there, butt-ass naked. Anger turned to jealousy, then hatred. My thoughts were filled with rage. I looked at them both with murder on my mind. How could this bitch I love and care for give away my pussy? I gave her every fucking thing. I was seconds away from committing murder, but my brother’s face flashed in my head. Then a little bitch of rational popped into my mind. I need to bury him. I got to see him one last time, and if I killed them, I would probably be locked up. I can’t do this.
The sweet melody of Akila’s voice interrupted my wicked thoughts. She reached over and touched my face. I tried not to show it, but she did something to me. I stared deep into her eyes. Behind that pain, I knew she was a good human being. Boy, was I so fucking wrong. That bitch tricked me into giving her the gun. How could I be so fucking stupid to trust a bitch that was fucking around on me? Soon as that bitch got ahold of the weapon, she turned it on me. For a quick second, I thought she was going to kill me. But that bum said some old corny shit to her, and she lowered the gun, then ordered me to leave. I looked at that bitch and smiled. One day, we shall meet again, and trust me, it won’t be pleasant.
I didn’t hesitate to get out of there. I wasn’t too sure that bitch or that pussy nigga wouldn’t call the police on me. I jumped into my car and pulled off. I feel like a chump leaving my gun in that bitch’s possession. And for that, she’ll pay with her life....
* * *
I was angry as fuck. I thought about going home, and that’s when it hit me: I didn’t have no home. I’ve been staying at my nigga’s crib, but I didn’t feel like being around no nigga right now. I thought about Dreema, but I didn’t want to be around her and that baby right now. Everything was cool before the baby was born, but lately, all that bitch do is argue and fight. I decided to grab me a bottle of Patrón and some blunts. I then got me a room at the hotel. I need time to clear my mind and plan this ho’s funeral.
 
Dreema
 
Mari was a straight bitch. Shit was all peachy when it was just us, but I noticed he changed ever since I had the baby. And to make matters worse, that nigga mad ’cause I got his ho locked up. Honestly, he can kiss my big, red ass for real. Me and my motherfucking baby don’t fucking need him.
I bathed my baby and put him down to sleep. I was getting tired of being in this house every damn day. I swear I felt like I was about to lose it. I’ve been smoking weed to ease the stress, but I fucked up and fell asleep the other day. When I woke up, my son was crying, his face was red, and he had shit all over him. I knew then I couldn’t be getting high like that no more. I wish I had some kind of help, but I guess that nigga was too busy chasing that old dumb-ass bitch.
I heard the phone ringing, so I got up and walked to the room to get it. “Hello.”
“What’s good, shawty? I been hitting you up.”
“Yeah, well, you know I just had a baby, so I been busy.”
“Man, yeah, whatever. I’m pulling up now.”
This rude motherfucker better go on now with his nasty-ass attitude. It’s bad enough he fucked up on some shit that was supposed to be simple. Now, he seems like he has an attitude. I reluctantly walked to the door and opened it. He walked in, and I locked the door behind him.
“Yo, where the fuck you been?”
“Nigga, I been here taking care of your fucking child,” I responded with an attitude.
“That nigga been over here since that shit happened?”
“Yeah, he been over here. What, you think I’m going to just stop him from coming by? Boy, how the fuck you shot the wrong brother? I texted you his picture and showed you what he had on. How do you fuck up a twenty-grand lick? I helped that nigga count twenty fucking grand. All you had to was rob the nigga. But guess what? You killed the nigga’s brother, so now the nigga put a hundred grand on the head of whoever did it. Yo, I swear I should’ve known you wouldn’t come through for me.” I walked off on him.
“Yo, shawty, it was dark, and the nigga looked like the picture you texted me. How was I supposed to know they looked like twins? Shit, I can still get the nigga. It ain’t too late.” He followed behind me in the room.
“You know how much heat that would bring? You fucked up, and now, I ain’t got shit.” I sat down on the bed.
“Man, fuck that nigga. He thinks this his seed, so milk that nigga for everything he’s worth. You need to do that shit fast. I’m tired of staying at my mama’s house while you over here playing house with this bitch-ass nigga. You promised a big payoff, but fuck this shit. That nigga playing.”
“I can’t believe you right now. Are you serious? You fucked up. That was easy money, nigga. You know what I think? You couldn’t stay sober enough to do what the fuck I asked you. I swear I have no idea why I keep dealing with you. You turnin’ out to be a big-ass mistake.”
“Yo, bitch, I ain’t tryin’a hear all that shit. You don’t remember who the fuck held you down before this nigga came in the picture? I’m a real motherfucking G. I bet you that nigga can’t fuck you as good as I can.”
“You’re so sick. You worried about who fucks me the best. To be honest, none of y’all can’t fuck me the way I want to be fucked. Yo, your son needs more Pampers and shit. That’s what you need to be worried about for real.”
“Yo, call that nigga. He big-money grip. I ain’t got shit. Matter of fact, I need some gas money right now.”
“Hmmm, I swear I have no idea how my pussy got wet for you.”
“Yo, just give me fifty bucks so I can go, and you can go back to playing house with that old dumb-ass nigga. Wait, what would it be worth to that nigga if he finds out who got his brother killed? That’s right. You did say a hundred grand. . . .” He smiled at me.
I was so disgusted right now. I got up and grabbed my purse. I took out two twenties and a ten and handed them to him. “Now, get out of my house and do me a fucking favor. Disappear for good.”
“Damn, shawty, I was only joking around with you.” He took the money and got up.
He walked over to my son’s crib and kissed him. He then walked out. I followed behind him.
“I love you, shawty. Keep that pussy tight for daddy.”
I didn’t respond. Instead, I slammed the door as soon as he walked out, making sure it was locked. I was feeling uneasy after he walked out. See, Damion and I been fucking with each other for years. I was fucking with him when he was making money in the streets. He caught a fed case and went away for a few years. When he came home, I started fucking back with him, thinking he would get back to the money. Months turned to years, and all he seemed to get on with was that powder. He kept making promises, but nothing came through. I should’ve said fuck him, but I felt guilty. I loved him when he was stacking, so I wanted to stick around to see if he would get back on.
I ended up meeting Mari and had a big plan to get us back on. At first, I was just after the money, but then I started having strong feelings for Mari. With his addiction getting out of control, Damion began applying pressure on me. I needed him to stay at his mama’s house, but he would come over here each time he needed money. I was scared he and Mari might meet up one day. So, I kept giving him money. It was supposed to be a big break for us the day Mari asked me to count twenty grand for him. I quizzed Mari about where he was heading. He told me he was about to meet up with his brother at the pool hall down Shockoe Bottom. I knew then it was the perfect timing.
I was so wrong. This nigga killed Rio, and we didn’t get the money. I was so disgusted by him that I could barely look at him. I really wish this was Mari’s son and not Damion’s. I’m happy that no one outside of us knows this. I will continue letting Mari play daddy ’cause Damion’s drug habit was getting in the way. He don’t even look the same. His clothes look big on him, and he is just slowly withering away. The last time we fucked, I had to keep thinking why I would even allow myself to lay up with his ass. I guess it’s true. You can’t help who you love, ’cause as sorry as it sounds, I love that sorry motherfucker’s dirty drawers.