Chapter Fourteen

I Am Smartacus

I started to stand, ready to leave and go home to my empty, lonely house and make a date with my trusty vibrator, Timothy Olyphant (who’d never abandon me!), when the door to the bar flew open and in rushed a young woman with long, wavy, honey-brown hair. She wore the same nervous expression as Dax, whom she approached breathlessly.

“Dax, I am so sorry about this.”

I sat right back down in my chair. Might as well use my newfound invisibility to spy on people and get the gossip. Maybe this new superpower wouldn’t be so bad. At least I’d be able to entertain myself. It was like watching live television.

“What am I supposed to do, Lily?” he asked, eyes flashing with anger.

She took the spot on the other side of Dax. “I know, seriously. It sucks, and I’m so, so sorry.”

I turned my head under the guise of checking the score on the TV—Cubs two, Cardinals zero—and in the process, nearly fell off my barstool.

Dax caught my arm without looking at me. “Hey, Peter, can you get Lily a beer?”

“A Miller Lite,” she said.

“Get something better,” he told her. “It’s on me.”

“Dax, I like Miller Lite.”

“Many people do,” I said.

Annoyed, Dax gestured toward me. “Lily, this is Annie. Annie, this is Lily, my sister.”

Oh, sister. Interesting. The plot thickens. I reached across Dax and offered her my hand. “Nice to meet you.”

“Are you…?” Lily, blue eyes wide, looked from me to Dax.

“No,” Dax and I said at the same time. A giggle bubbled up in my throat. As if.

“She’s becoming a regular here,” he added, rubbing his temples.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

“Nothing,” Dax said sharply.

“Obviously it’s not nothing,” I said. “Is it a headache?” I rummaged in my purse. “I always have ibuprofen…”

“It’s not a headache.”

Lily accepted her beer from Peter with a brief smile. “I just told Dax—”

“Lily, I’ve got it.” Dax glanced at me. “It’s really no big deal. I’ve been staying at Lily’s…for a little while,” he said, covering up some secret bit of information he evidently didn’t want me to know, “but now I have to find a new place to live. Immediately.” He sighed.

“Not you,” Lily said, frowning. “You can stay, but she has to go.”

She? This conversation kept getting more interesting. “Who’s she?” I asked.

“Joanne,” Lily said.

“My dog,” Dax said.

“You know I love Joanne.” Lily placed her hand on Dax’s forearm. “She’s the sweetest girl in the world, but Travis is super allergic.”

“You said Travis would be down in Atlanta,” Dax said.

“They lost their funding.” Lily looked at me. “Travis is my roommate. This situation was supposed to be perfect—Dax and Joanne needed a place to stay, Travis’s room was going to be available for a few months while he shot a movie down south—but now—”

“Travis is back,” Dax deadpanned.

“Yeah.” Lily frowned. “Again, Dax, I’m so, so sorry.”

“I know you are.” Dax cuffed his sister lightly on the arm. “But now what am I supposed to do?”

“Where’s Joanne now?” I asked, trying to imagine what a dog named “Joanne” might look like. I kept picturing a standard poodle with curly blond tufts of hair.

“Right outside.” Lily nodded toward the door. “In my car.” Her face brightened, and she turned to Dax. “Hey, maybe Mom and Dad can take her. Or Mur—”

“No,” he said sharply, cutting her off. “She’s my dog, Lil. I’ve had her for six years. I’m not just going to leave her in Wisconsin with Mom and Dad or hand her off to someone who’s not going to take care of her the way I would.”

“I’ll take her,” I said, not even thinking about it.

Dax and Lily looked at me as if I’d grown a second head.

“Annie, what are you talking about?” He picked up my water glass and smelled it.

I snatched the glass back. “I mean it. I have a huge, empty house,” I said, “and I love dogs.” At least I thought I did. I’d actually never had one of my own. My parents always refused to let us get one, no matter how much my brother and I begged. And then I was in med school, and interning, and doing my residency. The time never felt right, but now, with Kelly moving out, maybe having a dog could actually work. Why not try it out with someone else’s pet? Joanne could be my training pooch. “I’d be happy to have Joanne.”

“Maybe this is a good temporary solution,” Lily said. “Joanne can stay with Annie for a little while, until you find your own place.”

Dax glared at his sister for a moment before fixing his eyes on me. “You’re busy,” Dax said. “You’re a doctor with a very demanding job. Weren’t you the one telling me that you’re on call all the time?”

He had a point. My day-to-day schedule was mostly pretty fixed, but sometimes I did have to rush in, if someone needed me in the hospital. I hadn’t thought this whole Joanne thing through, probably because I’d been grasping at any straw that would prevent me from being alone right now.

“Besides,” Dax said, “this isn’t any different than shipping her off to live with Mom and Dad. I still wouldn’t get to be with her.”

A ludicrous, half-baked idea popped into my head. I brushed it off. But it persisted. Maybe it wasn’t so half-baked. Maybe it was an amazing, perfect idea. “Dax, you can move in, too.”

Now the siblings looked at me as if I’d added a third head to my previous two.

“I know it sounds ridiculous, but your timing’s actually good. My friend Kelly—you’ve met her—”

“The one who got engaged.”

My stomach soured. “Yes. She’s moving out to Galena to start her new life with Mark, and her room is empty.” Or it would be, after I chucked all her things into the guest room on the top floor. “It’s not even a room, really. It’s a whole apartment. You and Joanne could have the entire garden-level floor to yourself.” I snapped my fingers. “And it’s really perfect because you and I work totally different hours. You can watch Joanne during the day, and I’ll be around in the evenings and at night. She’ll be the happiest, most spoiled dog in the world.” I paused for a breath. “What do you say?”

Dax gawked at me. “What do you get out of this?” he asked. “I can pay you rent, obviously.”

I shook my head. “I don’t want the money.”

“Then what do you want?”

I raised my eyebrows. “I want a Tuesday night trivia partner.”