Cautionary Tale
A little girl called Josephine
Was fair of face and reasonably clean
But at school she wore a dunce’s cap
And her father, taking out a map
Said: ‘She’ll learn more if she comes with me
About the world and life at sea.
What she needs is a trip on my schooner
I’m surprised I didn’t think of it sooner.
For I am captain of the Hesperus
And I think I know what’s best for us.’
And thereupon a most dreadful fate
Befell her, which I’ll now relate.
It was winter when they left the port
(in retrospect they shouldn’t ought)
Setting sail for the Spanish Main
Despite warnings of a hurricane.
Three days out there came the gale
Even the skipper he turned pale
And as for little Josephine
She turned seven shades of green.
As the schooner rocked from port to starboard
Across the decks poor Josie scarpered
She ran from the fo’c’sle to the stern
(Some folks’ll never learn)
Crying: ‘Stop the boat, I want to go home.’
But unheeding, the angry foam
Swamped the decks. Her dad did curse
Knowing things would go from bad to worse.
He pulled his daughter to his side
‘Put on my seaman’s coat,’ he cried
‘You’ll be safe ’til the storm has passed.’
Then bound her tightly to the mast.
And pass it did, but sad to say
Not for a fortnight and a day.
By then the ship had foundered
And all the crew had drownded.
And reported later in the press
Was a story that caused much distress
Of a couple walking on the shore
And of the dreadful sight they saw
MORAL
Stay on at school, get your GCSEs
Let others sail the seven seas.
