TOM SPENT a good amount of time bringing my hair back to something resembling order. Prior to that, he’d brought me to climax in under five minutes, allowing me to fuck his mouth. He held me through the aftershocks, and I didn’t want to leave this room—not now or ever. Why couldn’t we bask in the glory of that moment, and forget about reality for a while longer?
“What about you?” I asked as I gestured to the clearly visible outline of his erection in his leather pants.
Tom shrugged, then pinched the tip of his tail. A pained groan escaped him, but his erection waned instantly. I cringed in sympathy. “That’s one way to get rid of it. I would’ve sucked you off, you know?”
“There’s no time. We need to attend the meeting,” Tom replied. A smile appeared on his face when he added, “But I wouldn’t mind receiving a blow job later today.”
I grinned at him. “Deal.”
Tom pulled me against his chest and tucked my head under his chin. One of his hands cupped the back of my head, while the other hand rested on my ass. His tail swished restlessly along my spine, brushing lightly, and evoking goose bumps everywhere.
“Didn’t you say we should go to the meeting?” I asked after a couple of minutes.
“I did.”
“When exactly did you want to go?”
Tom expelled a long breath that ghosted over the top of my head. His voice was barely above a whisper, and even I realized it was trembling with pent-up emotion. “What do I have to do for you to stay here and not go down to Ligador?”
I struggled against the hold he had on me, but he didn’t budge—not one single inch. “Damn, you’re so strong!” I complained. “We had this talk already. I’m going, that’s the end of it. Hey, did I mention that I’m not fond of talking into your chest? Not that anything’s wrong with your chest, but….”
Tom’s chest heaved, and as he slowly allowed me to withdraw, the muscles in his chest rippled in a tantalizing manner underneath his skin. I licked my lips and reminded myself we shouldn’t start something and lifted my gaze. I’m pretty sure I did a perfect stranded-fish imitation, what with the way it felt when my jaw dropped.
“Are you crying?” I squeaked.
I couldn’t help it. Normal tone of voice was out of the question as soon as I laid eyes on Tom. His dark brown eyes were filled to the brim with unshed tears. I grabbed his head and pulled him down for a harsh, biting kiss. At first I feared he wouldn’t reciprocate, and where would that leave me? I didn’t know how to cope with this side of him, nor did I want to come up with something else to cheer him up.
After a while, I gentled my assault, and Tom rested his forehead against mine. In between gulps for air, he said, “I take it you don’t like seeing me like that?”
“No!” I blurted. I cleared my throat to dial down the volume of my voice. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to shout. It’s just… you’re a Nadisc. You’re not supposed to show weakness.”
“You regard showing my emotions for you as a weakness?”
I cringed. “Uh, I’m sensing that no matter what I say I’ll maneuver myself into a corner. I mean, you won’t be pleased with anything I say.”
“Since when does that stop you from blurting out whatever it is you want to say?”
Huffing, I pulled my hands away from his head and braced them on my hips. For good measure, I glared at him for a long time, since a witty reply eluded me.
“You’re cute when you’re outraged,” Tom said.
“I’m what?”
“Cute.”
He’d caught me on the wrong foot—absolutely the wrong foot. “I-I… I’m not cute! You can say I’m tough or loud or obnoxious or annoying or… whatever, but do not say I’m cute. This is….” I flailed my hands in the air, helplessly searching for a word that would describe my current state sufficiently, but came up empty. No matter how often I’d played the cuteness factor in the past, no one should dare to use the word aloud. “It’s ridiculous. We should get going.”
With a dramatic flair, I pivoted on my heel and stormed toward the door. Two steps into my stomp, Tom’s tail jerked me back, right against his chest, where I collided with a surprised yelp.
“Hey, I was going to stomp away. You’re destroying my performance!”
“How inconsiderate of me.”
“You’re making fun of me,” I said, even as I leaned into his embrace and closed my eyes. “I can’t stay here, no matter how much I want to wet my pants just thinking about going back to Ligador. You wouldn’t stay here either.”
“It’s different for me. I’ve fought against those beasts, and I never had to worry about someone I l—”
I cut him off. “Okay, okay, I got it. We’ll be better equipped this time. We know what to expect, and I can take care of myself. You don’t have to protect me.” I traced my fingertips over the hairs on his forearm. “Except when one of these things wants to eat me. Then you can play the big protector.”
A shudder ran through him. “No one will harm you as long as I live.”
“Don’t say stuff like that. It makes you sound as if you’d sacrifice yourself.”
“That’s what I said.”
Okay, this was enough. More than enough, really, and absolutely more than I could deal with. I slapped my hands on Tom’s forearm, surprising him enough that I could wiggle around to face him.
Grabbing the edges of his leather vest, I thumped my fists against his chest. “You will not sacrifice yourself, understood? I’m not some damsel in distress. I don’t need to be rescued. I’ve been in tight situations before, and I’ve always found a way out. We barely know each other, for fuck’s sake!”
Tom tilted his head to the side. He didn’t seem to get my meaning. I wish I could batter some common sense into him, but that would be futile.
I let out a frustrated growl before I continued. “Look, you can’t go around telling me you’d sacrifice your life for me when you don’t really know me. For all I know, we’ve got nothing more in common than the desire to fuck each other’s brains out! Maybe you like arts and I most definitely don’t. Maybe you—”
This time Tom cut me off. “We mated, so we’re made for each other. That’s all I need to know.”
“That’s so stupid!”
“No, it’s not. You’re still struggling to accept the mating bond, and I wish we had more time to ourselves to strengthen it, but that doesn’t seem possible. I will, however, protect you, and nothing you say will convince me to act any differently.” Tom slid an arm underneath my ass and hoisted me up until our eyes were on the same level.
For a lack of anything more profound, I grumbled, “Don’t lift me all the freaking time. I’m not a baby!”
“You’re most definitely not.” Tom leered at me, which brought out a reluctant smile on my face. “But I like holding you.”
“You could hold me while I still have my feet firmly planted on the ground.”
“But that would mean getting a crick in my neck from looking down.”
I gaped at him before I caught the slight twitch in his left cheek. “Very funny. I’m not that small, just in comparison with you, and that’s only because you Nadisc tower over any human being.”
Tom grinned at me. The veil of tears had disappeared, for which I was grateful. Just for a second I’d been tempted to give in, to stay there and wait for his return. Partly because I really didn’t fancy meeting another of those gigantic war beasts, and partly because I wanted to please him. Since when did I put someone else’s wishes before my own?
“We should go now,” Tom said.
“Well, if you’d just let go of me, maybe we’ll succeed in leaving this room.” Tom set me on my feet and gave my behind a firm pat. “No playing with my ass now. I don’t want to give my report while sporting a boner.”
“I’m sure some people would find it entertaining.”
“You wouldn’t be jealous?” I asked, genuinely confused.
“I trust you.”
I broke into laughter. Trust me? I was known for sleeping around, for getting it on with anyone who tickled my fancy—and he had faith in me? “You trust me? Me? I hate to destroy your bubble, but I’m not exactly known as monogamous.”
“You will be from now on.”
Now that was plain annoying. Sarcastically, I drawled, “Will I?”
“It’s part of the mating bond.”
“What?” I snorted. “Sluts miraculously turn into lovers of monogamy? Seriously?”
Tom’s frill flared, and the shrill combination of bright colors sent me stumbling back a step. His voice dropped to that gravelly tone I’d grown to love and loathe at the same time. “I don’t want to hear you put yourself down ever again.”
“Put myself down?” I shook my head. “You don’t get it. I’m proud of that slut reputation. It makes life so much easier. Everyone knows what to expect, and no one claims to sacrifice their life if they deem it necessary.”
“You’re not proud of your reputation,” Tom said with a stubborn set to his jaw.
I raised my hands in surrender. “Maybe not exactly proud—”
“Ashamed is the word you’re looking for.”
“Shut the fuck up!” I wasn’t ashamed. Or at least I hadn’t been before I met him. Now all my sleeping around felt like some kind of grand personality failure, one I didn’t want him to know about, which of course was impossible. When had my life become so complicated?
“Berit.” Tom voiced my name softly before he laid a hand on my shoulder.
I tensed underneath his touch but couldn’t bring myself to shake him off. “You’re confusing the ever-loving shit out of me. I don’t like this feeling. I don’t like any of what happened in the last twenty-four hours.”
“While I don’t like what happened on Ligador, I’m very happy to have found you. I knew my mate would be a human, but you humans are scattered all over this galaxy, so I wasn’t sure I’d ever find you. Fate intervened, though, and that’s a very good thing. I hope your confusion will lift soon.”
I sniffled, surprised by the sudden tightness in my throat.
“Berit?”
“Got something in my eye,” I choked out.
“Let me help you.”
“I’d rather….” I trailed off when Tom turned me around to gaze deeply into my eyes. For such a large man… Nadisc… he had surprisingly kind eyes. Eyes that saw much more than I was comfortable with. I didn’t know who I was with him, just that he didn’t want me pretending to be someone I wasn’t, and anxiety coiled in the pit of my stomach.
“I do trust you,” Tom repeated.
“I trust you too,” I whispered. Because I did. Nothing had ever seemed clearer than that particular insight. I forced a smile on my face and added, “But I don’t trust you to get us to the meeting in time.”
Tom swore as he took my hand and towed me out of the room.