CHAPTER
Twenty

The chill of midspring caused Esther to burrow deeper into the covers and relish this, her last day in the hall of virgins. Her maids milled in silence about the room, one fanning a small fire in a brick oven, another setting food at a table near the fire, a third off in another room preparing a bath.

“You are awake,” Mahin said, smiling down at her. “I see you wish you were not. Did we make too much noise, mistress?”

Esther poked her head above the warm blankets. “I was just enjoying the warmth and the feeling of the bed on my last morning here.”

Mahin looked away, and Esther caught a glimpse of tears in her eyes. “We will miss you.” Her voice sounded hoarse.

Esther sat up, the covers forgotten. “You have no need of that. You will surely go with me to the king’s harem for his wives.”

Mahin shook her head. “I do not know whether Hegai can spare us. And I do not know if you are allowed to keep us. Most virgins do not take their maids with them.”

Esther pondered the girl’s words as Parisa held open a thick robe for her and Rosana led her to sit and eat. She would not be joining the other virgins in the dining hall today. Nothing would be the same today or after this day, and the thought brought tension to her middle and caused a sense of anxiety and excitement to mingle within her. She looked at her maids, all of them avoiding her gaze.

“Well, this will never do,” she said, smiling at them. “If I have anything to say about it, if any request is given to me, I will ask for all of you. And if I am refused, you must obey your next mistress willingly. It does no good to compare one with another, as you may come to hate me or her, depending on whom you like better.”

Mahin laughed and the others giggled. “The very thought that we could ever hate you.” Mahin laughed harder, a delightful sound. “You are the most gracious of them all. Everyone loves you, mistress. Do you not realize this?”

She shook her head. “I have not given the matter any thought.”

“Well, they do. Especially Hegai. He favors you best,” Zareen said.

Esther fingered a date, embarrassed by the praise. “I am glad,” she said softly. She looked overlong at each piece of furniture, each article of clothing, each woman in her care, each item of food set before her, in an attempt to extend the moments and place them solidly in her memory. At last she stood and walked to the window to gaze on the gardens that had brought her much peace in her year here.

A knock at the door caused her to turn. Hettie hurried to answer it. Hegai stood tall in the arch of the door and moved inside, his girth and height seeming to fill the room.

She walked closer. “Hegai. Thank you for coming.” Her maids stood back as if they did not know what to do. Or perhaps they waited for his instructions for her.

“This is your day, Esther. You may choose whatever you like to take to the king. Remember, this is your last day to occupy these rooms. So take what means the most to you.” He looked at her with an expression of fatherly affection.

Esther studied him, her heart aching, already missing him. “I would like you to pick for me, Hegai. I trust you. You know the king better than I, whereas I only know what I have been told, some of which is not likely to be completely true. I would take my mother’s ring, but other than that, I ask you to choose, please.”

Hegai smiled, his mouth slightly tilted to one side and his eyes lit with a boyish enthusiasm. “Thank you, Esther.” He looked at her maids. “After you have bathed and oiled her with the faintest hint of frankincense, use no other perfume. Apply only the lightest of the cosmetics. She is beautiful without them, so let us not mar her beauty.” He studied her. “Dress her in a simple white, semi-sheer tunic. The king will enjoy the ability to see her well. But cover the tunic with a pale blue robe trimmed in purple.”

Parisa hurried to the garment room and returned with clothing that matched Hegai’s description. “Do these suffice, my lord?”

Hegai took the tunic and robe and nodded. “Soft and beautiful. Yes. This is perfect. Tie the robe with a purple sash. Place a golden pendant around her neck and hang golden earrings from her ears. Let me see her choice of sandals.”

Parisa hurried back to the room after laying the garments flat on the bed, which had already been stripped of its linens. She returned with an armful of sandals and set them on a chair.

Hegai bent to examine them and pulled a pair of intricately carved leather devoid of jewels from the pile. “You will go as a virgin with hints of wealth to show off your character and your beauty. You may wear your mother’s ring, but do not wear bracelets. The less distraction you give him, the better. The king, you shall see, likes simple pleasures, despite the ornate designs you find throughout the palace.”

“And my hair?” Esther’s head spun with his quick choices. She sensed by his look that Hegai had planned this for some time, probably in the hopes that she would ask for his help. She breathed a silent prayer of thanks to Adonai, for she knew she could never have decided on her own.

Hegai rubbed his chin and had her turn about. Her long, dark hair fell to the middle of her back. To wear it down would be scandalous. Her heart beat faster at the thought, for she had no idea what Hegai would suggest or what the king would desire.

“Wear it up. Hold it in place with combs that are easily removed. The king will enjoy removing them.” His frank comment made heat fill her cheeks, despite her training. To think that this night all of her training would come to fruition caused repeated bouts of anxiety to fill her. Could Hegai see the rapid pounding of her heart beneath her robe?

“Parisa, you do her hair. You have a knack for setting the combs just right.”

Parisa nodded. “Yes, my lord.”

“All right then.” Hegai looked her over once more. “I will leave you to enjoy your last day here, but be ready to come with me before the sun sets. The king often enjoys watching it glow, and perhaps he would enjoy sharing that with you.”

Esther simply nodded as Hegai turned and walked out as quickly as he had come. Her maids all began to talk at once, and Esther moved as one in a dream, or perhaps as a lamb to the slaughter, if she thought overmuch on what was really about to take place. This day would go too fast. She told herself over and over again that she was ready.

Hegai again appeared at Esther’s door hours later as the sun began its descent over Persia. Her heart had beat like a steady drum all day, but now as she saw the smile and approving nod of Hegai and the giddy excitement of her maids who stood surrounding her, it slowed to a normal rhythm. What had been done was done. What would be would be. She had only to control her emotions, her actions, and her words. The rest was up to God. Did He care about her situation in this foreign place?

The walk down the long, winding palace halls seemed to stretch on and on, to the point that even her maids fell silent, the only noise Hegai’s heavy footfalls. When they reached the hall leading to the king’s chambers, Hegai dismissed her maids and pointed to a door several paces away. “From here you must go alone.” He regarded her with gentle affection. “Do all that has been taught to you. Remember my advice, and treat the king as graciously as you have everyone else within the palace. Do this and you will find the experience a good one.”

He bowed to her, and she fought to keep tears at bay. Would she ever see him again? Once she entered the second harem she would be under the care of a different eunuch. The temptation to hug him filled her, but she knew if she mussed her gown, he would be troubled and anxious. So she simply leaned forward and kissed his cheek.

“Thank you, Hegai. I will never forget you or all you have done for me.” She moved on at his parting nod, her heart once again picking up its pace. She reminded herself to move slowly, with grace. Guards stood on either side of the door, but they did not look her way. Was she supposed to knock?

Before she could think of what to do next, the door opened and a servant ushered her into the room. Hegai must have timed her entrance with the servant. She stepped across the threshold and glanced about the room. Hegai had been right. The king’s tastes were simple, not elegant as the rest of the palace was.

“Welcome.” A man who could only be the king stepped toward her. His straight brown hair fell to his shoulders, and his light brown beard was cropped short. Green eyes focused on her, making her breath catch. He was older than she but still bore a handsome, well-muscled frame beneath his unadorned purple robe. No crown graced his head. Nevertheless, she bowed low at his approach.

“Tell me your name,” he said.

He took her hand, and she straightened. “Esther, my lord.”

He studied her for a lengthy moment, his smile casual. “Come. Share a meal with me.” He led her to a table near a window that allowed him a wide view of the city he ruled. “Sit.” He motioned to a cushioned stool, where she gingerly sat, watching him.

Golden plates were piled high with food, and smaller golden bowls sat at each setting. Wine sparkled in golden goblets with intricate designs as though waiting for them to taste its richness.

“Are you hungry?” He tilted his head to better look at her.

“Not overmuch. But I could eat a few things.” In truth, she had lost her appetite soon after the morning meal. Anticipation and a hint of dread had replaced her need for food.

“I am not surprised.” He broke off a piece of bread and filled the bowl with nuts and fruit. “You are likely worried what to expect from me.” He said it so matter-of-factly that she looked up and searched his gaze.

“I have been curious about you since the day they brought me here.” She smiled. “And yet no one seemed to be able to tell me the things I wished to know.”

He laughed. “You have likely been listening to the gossips.”

“And learning about the wars you have won and the grand structures you are building. But that does not tell me about you, oh king.” She told her heart to slow lest she speak too fast and say too much.

“What would you like to know?” He popped a grape into his mouth.

“I would like to hear you tell of the things you care about. Tell me whatever you would like to tell.” She toyed with the bread he had given her, then took a small bite.

He picked up his cup and sipped but did not hold it long. For the remainder of the meal, and afterward in the sitting room, he talked about becoming king, the wars with everyone but Greece, and his pride in the buildings he was in the process of constructing. He did not mention his other wives or children, and Esther did not ask.

“You already seem to know and understand these things,” he said when he finished.

“I was allowed to visit the king’s library, where a scribe read to me some of your exploits and the history written in the annals of kings. I hope this does not displease you.” She silently hoped she had not revealed something that might get Hegai in trouble.

The king smiled. “I am amazed that you had interest. I have no issue against you gaining such knowledge. No other wife has ever cared what I do.”

She searched his gaze. “I would think it very odd not to care what my husband enjoys or gives his time to do. Your words surprise me.”

He rose and took her hand in his. “And you surprise me, Esther.” He moved his hand to the small of her back and led her into an adjoining room, his private sleeping quarters.

Esther told herself to remain calm, but she felt her body tense at the sight of the large canopied bed. This was why she had come. She could not run or deny him what was rightfully his. Or not rightfully his, but he was the king, after all. She drew in a slow breath.

“Are you afraid?” He turned her to face him. “I see it in your eyes.”

She lowered her gaze for a brief moment, then looked up. “I fear, my lord, that this brings to mind my upbringing that says not to lie with a man without the benefit of marriage, of a covenant between us. I know this is not the same, for I already belong to you.”

“Yes, you do,” he said, but there was no anger in his tone.

Esther again lowered her head, suddenly ashamed that she had been so forthright. “Forgive me, my lord.”

She felt the gentle pressure of his fingers lift her chin. He looked deeply into her eyes as if he were reading a scroll. “All of the women who are called to these chambers come willing to please me. They do whatever I ask them to do, and this is part of it.” He gestured toward the bed.

“Yes, my lord. I know that it is.”

“You do not need to fear me, Esther.”

She simply nodded.

“But you do.”

She smoothed her gown. “I will do whatever you ask of me, my lord.”

“You remind me of Vashti,” he said, his tone low, husky. “And yet you are nothing like her.” A deep sigh escaped him. “You draw out a need within me to protect you, though you are willing to do whatever I ask. You delight me, Esther.” His slight smile seemed to need her affirmation.

“Thank you, my lord. I find myself grateful for your kindness to me.”

Silence passed between them as he studied her. She could not decide whether she should look into his eyes or at her feet, and she longed to fidget with her sash.

“Remove your robe,” he said at last. He took a step back from her as she did as he asked. “Now turn around slowly.”

Heat filled her cheeks, and she prayed he did not notice as he looked at her through the sheer tunic. She expected the king to step forward and take her into his arms at any moment, but when she faced him again, he simply stood watching her. At last he stepped closer, bent to pick up her robe, and held the arms open for her.

She put her arms through the sleeves, her mind whirling. He took the sash and tied it around her waist, his breath so close it fanned her face. Would he kiss her? Did he find her unpleasing? Was he sending her away without the benefit of becoming his wife?

He took her hand again and walked her back to his sitting room. He led her to a couch filled with cushions, one he had occupied as they talked after the meal. Confusion swirled within her as he knelt in front of her. Her heart picked up its earlier unsettling rhythm, and she did not miss the ardent desire in his gaze.

He lifted her hand to his lips and kissed each finger. When he came to her mother’s ring, he paused. “Tell me about this ring. It is not like the jewels I provide my women.”

“It belonged to my mother. She died when I was a baby.”

The comment brought a look of approval to his eyes. He smiled. “Esther. You have made me feel things tonight that I have not felt in a very long time. A sense that I must protect you at all costs has arisen within me.” He paused as if searching for the right words. “I have the strongest desire to take you to my bed, and yet I cannot. Not yet.”

She gave him a quizzical look, not sure whether to fear or hope.

“I want you, Esther. But I also want you to be happy, and this is a life you did not choose. So I will give you a choice. You can either marry me at week’s end and take Vashti’s place as queen of Persia . . . or you may go back to your father and marry a man of your desire. You are young and I am old in comparison. And I am not likely to ever make such an offer to anyone again. This is completely out of character for me.” He laughed lightly. “My advisors would think me mad.”

“You would offer me this and never take me to your bed?” The idea seemed incredulous since she had spent the past year preparing for that very thing.

He nodded. “It is as though the gods will not allow me to touch you outside of marriage. I do not understand it, but you give me a feeling that we could truly be of one heart and soul. I do not wish to mar that with rushing what you would normally expect from a husband.”

“You wish to be my husband?”

“Must I say it again?”

She shook her head. “No, my lord. I am just astonished. Forgive me. I would not wish to make the king repeat his words.”

He kissed her fingers once more. The action stirred something within her, and she found that despite their age difference, she could not refuse him. Gad had been lost to her long ago, and there was no other man in her village she would want or who would want her, now that everyone would assume she had spent a night with the king.

She wondered if his request bordered on desire alone or if he could feel the emotion between them. Did he love her? So soon?

“I would be most honored to marry you, my king.”

At the king’s loud shout, she jumped. He stood and pulled her to her feet and into his arms, then twirled her about like a dancer. Laughter bubbled from deep within him, and she joined him. He set her on her feet once more and bent to kiss her cheek. “You cannot imagine how much I want you,” he whispered in her ear. “But I will wait until week’s end. In the meantime, you will return to Hegai and prepare for our wedding.”

She smiled into his eyes, igniting a look she interpreted as love. She returned his look, hoping he could sense her feelings without words.

“You may address me as Xerxes,” he said softly.

She touched his cheek, for she sensed the offer was a great gift. “Thank you . . . Xerxes. It is a strong name, fit for a great king.”

He laughed again, giddy as a young boy, and twirled her about the room. Then he led her to the door and called for his servants.

“We have a new queen!” he announced. “Call all of my servants and bring Hegai. We have a week to prepare a wedding feast like no other for the new queen of Persia.”