Liam felt as though the room had suddenly tilted to some crazy, other-world angle. He tried to make sense of the words coming from Derek Rickard’s mouth. And failed.
Kathleen? His father? An illegitimate son?
There was no sense to be made. None. Rickard was just stirring up trouble. Bad-mouthing his father for reasons of his own. And then rage gathered slowly in his gut, swirling up like a funnel, heating his blood with its intensity. He glanced toward Kayla and saw confusion and then panic in her eyes. He wanted to calm her, to make things right. But he couldn’t muster the strength to do anything other than stare blankly at the man who’d made the terrible accusation.
He found his voice and hated that it sounded raspy and desperate. “What are you talking about?”
Derek’s mouth thinned and he laughed humorlessly. “About my sister. And your father. About the whole tawdry and disgraceful situation.”
“You’re lying.”
“Ask him yourself,” the other man said. “Ask him how he had an affair with my sister, got her pregnant and then forced her to leave town because he knew the scandal would ruin him.”
Liam’s head throbbed. It couldn’t be true. His father was a lot of things, but the idea he’d betrayed his mother and their family in such a way? It was incomprehensible. Out of the question.
But when he looked at Marion Rickard he saw no lie in her eyes, and in that moment the world shifted, mocking him and everything he believed he was. He thought about his family. He thought about his life. His past. His present. And knew that suddenly it had all changed. Kayla grasped his arm tighter, as though sensing his sudden dive into a place that was filled with despair and disbelief and a kind of mounting helplessness that rocked him to the very core of his soul.
“I have to get out of here,” he said the words low in his throat, only for Kayla to hear them. “I have to talk to my father.”
“I can’t leave them now,” she whispered. “I have to stay.”
Her words were like puncture wounds. She was staying. She was choosing sides.
Resentment replaced his despair and settled in his belly. “Suit yourself,” he said as he pulled away from her grasp and then walked across the room, desperate to keep moving.
When he reached the doorway Marion spoke to him. “I did warn you that you might not like what you find out, Liam.”
Within seconds he was down the hall and out of the house. By the time he reached his vehicle his chest was pounding and he was forced to sit behind the wheel and suck in several long breaths to control his haywire breathing.
Get a grip...
He tried not to think of Kayla as he headed off. Tried not to remember she’d made it clear where she stood. Because it hurt so much he could barely breathe.
He rang his father’s cell, but it went to voice mail. There was nothing unusual about that since his father hated cell phones. Then he called the hotel and was informed his father had turned up looking for him earlier than afternoon, but hadn’t hung around.
It took fifteen minutes to drive to his parents’ home, set on fifty acres of prime grazing land that hadn’t seen a head of cattle for decades. The painted fences, long driveway and manicured lawns led to the sprawling white ranch house that was elegant enough to grace the cover of a magazine. Seven bedrooms, five bathrooms, three living areas, a game room, and indoor pool and spa...it was the perfect home, the grandest in the county. But although he’d been happy enough growing up among the luxury, Liam preferred his quiet house by the river.
He spotted his father’s Range Rover in the driveway and the tightness in his chest increased. It was Thursday—he knew his mother played bridge on Thursdays. Which was just as well, since the conversation he intended having with his father wasn’t one he wanted to share with his mom.
When Liam entered the house he found his father in the kitchen, rifling through the refrigerator. He was a big man, tall and broad-shouldered, and at sixty one, still fit and active. As a boy he’d idolized his dad. His father was a giant. A superhero. Infallible. Indestructible.
When he entered the room his father stopped what he was doing, looked at him and frowned.
“What happened to you today? I went to the hotel looking for you. You took off from that meeting without so much as a—”
Liam walked toward the dining table, rested both hands on the back of one of the timber chairs and spoke. “I went to be with my wife.”
His father fumbled with the bowl in his hand and closed the fridge. “What?”
“My wife,” he said flatly. “I got married a month ago.”
“Married?” J.D. said the word as though he’d misheard. “You got married? Who the hell to?”
“Kayla Rickard.”
The moment he said her name his father’s expression shifted from disbelief to shock. “Derek Rickard’s daughter? The pretty blonde from the museum?”
Liam stiffened at his father’s disregard. “You know exactly who she is.”
“Sure I do,” J.D. replied and shrugged. “She was at the hospital? That’s why you left the meeting?”
“Correct.”
“Is she okay?”
Liam nodded. “She’s fine.”
“So, you’re married to Derek Rickard’s daughter? Why the hell are you telling me this now and not four weeks ago? Why the secrecy?” His brows rose. “Did you knock her up?”
Anger weaved its way up his spine. Now was not the time to talk about the baby. He didn’t want to share the news. Didn’t want it tainted by the conversation. “We thought we’d wait a while to tell everyone, considering how certain people would react to the news. But you know how the truth is, Dad...eventually it always comes out.”
The pulse in his father’s cheek beat erratically and he realized the other man looked uncharacteristically cornered. “Is there some point you’re trying to make, Liam?”
“Yes,” he replied tightly. “I want you to tell me the truth. I want you to tell me about Kathleen.”
“What?”
“You heard me. Kathleen... Derek Rickard’s sister. Tell me what she is to you?”
Liam watched as his father moved to the counter and set the bowl down. “I don’t want to—”
“Tell me what she is to you!” Liam demanded and slammed a fist on the table.
His father stilled and sucked in a breath. Silence stretched for an age. Like elastic. Creating distance and then drawing them back together. The truth teetered on the edge of the air, until finally, his father spoke quietly. “She’s the mother of my son.”
Liam’s chest tightened inexplicably. His father had another son. A child with another woman. Pain seared through his blood when he thought of his own mother. Of Kieran and Sean and Liz and his nieces. Of his family. Of what it would mean when it was revealed. And then of Marion Rickard’s words: Be careful what you ask for, Liam...you might find you don’t like the answer.
He drew in a long and steady breath. “Does Mom know?”
J.D. shook his head. “No.”
It was betrayal of the worst possible kind. Lies and decades of deception. It was as though everything he’d known was suddenly a facade. “You cheating bastard.”
His father winced. “You don’t understand what I—”
“I understand enough. I understand that you got Derek Rickard’s teenage sister pregnant while you were married to my mother and have lied about it for thirty years.” Bile rose in his throat as he said the words and he swallowed hard.
“I had to,” his father said quietly. “I had a family I had to protect... I had responsibilities and—”
“You had a responsibility to be loyal to your wife,” Liam shot back. “But I guess loyalty and honor aren’t that important to you, are they, Dad?” In that moment he almost hated saying the word. “But secrecy obviously is.”
J.D.’s mouth twisted. “You’re right, I’m a cheating bastard,” he admitted and shrugged. “I had an affair and betrayed my wife. I’m guilty as charged. But it looks like you’ve kept your own secrets, too.”
Liam laughed humorlessly. “Kayla and I kept our relationship under wraps because Derek Rickard hates you and by extension he hates me and everyone named O’Sullivan. I didn’t know why up until half an hour ago. But now I do. Now I understand.”
His father stepped around the counter. “Are you going to tell your mother?”
“No,” Liam said flatly. “You are. And you’re going to tell her today.”
Then he spun on his heels and strode from the room.
He knew his father would follow him. J.D. O’Sullivan wasn’t a man who took kindly to ultimatums. By the time he was out the front door and on the porch his father was a few steps behind him.
“Liam, you don’t realize what you’re saying,” his dad said, breathing hard. “It’s better this way. Better for everyone. Better for you and your brothers. Better for your mother. And better for Kathleen and Jonah and I won’t be—”
“Jonah?” The word left his mouth like poison. “He has a name?”
“Well, of course he has a name. He’s my son and I—”
Liam laughed painfully, cutting off his father. “My God, of course... You still see them.”
J.D. didn’t deny it. “I see Jonah occasionally.”
“And he knows about us? About Mom and your life in Cedar River?”
“He knows.”
Liam’s chest tightened. “And what about Kathleen? Is that what this is? Do you have some kind of two-family thing going on, Dad?” Liam was so wound up, so mad with his father in that moment that he could have hiked up the three steps and punched him in the face. “Oregon,” he said caustically. “That’s where they are, right? Those fishing trips you sometimes take with your old college buddies? Those trips that Kieran and I begged to go on so many times when we were kids, but were told were always off-limits... That’s where you went. To another state to be with your other family?”
“It wasn’t like that,” his father said, coming down the steps. “I went to see Jonah, not Kathleen. Once she left town we didn’t have that kind of relationship. I promise you.”
I promise you...
They were hollow words. Like the ones he and Kayla had made to one another a month earlier. Love, honor, cherish. Empty. Meaningless.
Liam stepped back and shook his head. “The thing is, Dad, your promises don’t mean a damn thing anymore.”
Then he got into his truck and drove off.
* * *
By the time she spotted Liam’s pickup barreling down the driveway it was close to six o’clock. Kayla had been sitting on the veranda for half an hour, upset, but determined to keep herself together. Things had gone from bad to worse at her parents’. Her mother had tried to pacify her father, but he wasn’t having any of it, and in the end, Kayla had given up, telling her mother she’d call the following day. It left her with a heavy heart. All her life she’d tried to do the right thing, to make her parents proud. And the one time she’d followed her heart, all she’d done was hurt the two people who had loved her most in the world.
Kayla watched as Liam pulled up outside the house and got out of the truck. He looked beat. Worn out. And more alone that she’d thought possible.
He looked surprised to see her and stalled by the bottom step. “I didn’t expect to see you here,” he said, always straight to the point. “Are you all right?”
She shrugged. “Sort of. You?”
He took a second. “Since my life kind of imploded today, I’ve been better.”
Kayla’s heart ached and she got to her feet. “I’m so sorry, Liam... I had no idea.”
He took the steps slowly and when he reached her Kayla walked directly to him. He seemed remote...as impenetrable as a marble statue. Until she pressed closer, wrapped her arms around his waist and held on to him tightly. She heard him sigh, felt his body loosen against hers, almost against his own will. A few seconds later she felt his breath in her hair, his hands on her shoulders and then down her back, until they rested on her hips. It was so good to be close to him, to inhale the subtle woodsy male scent of his cologne and feel his chest rise and fall with each breath he took.
“How are you really feeling?” he asked and pulled apart a fraction so he could reach her chin and tilt her face toward his. “No lingering effects from this morning? No more fainting?”
“I’m fine,” she assured him. “I’ve had another snack this afternoon so I’m back to normal. And I bought the fixings to make spaghetti,” she said and gestured to the shopping bag by the door.
“You’re staying for dinner?”
“If that’s okay?”
His grasp on her chin tightened a little. “This is your home. It’s our home.”
He kissed her gently, covering her mouth with his in a way that was both familiar and new. Kayla pressed against him and he deepened the kiss, drawing her tongue into his mouth, instantly hitching up the heat between them. She sighed and gave herself up to the moment, holding on as he anchored her head with one hand and kissed her like nothing else and no one else existed.
“God, I’ve missed you,” he said raggedly against her mouth and then trailed his lips to her jaw and the delicate skin below her ear. “I’ve missed this.”
Kayla knew the tension between them over the past few days had been partly fuelled by a complete lack of intimacy. She hadn’t spent a night at the house in over a week and it had been days before that since they’d made love. At the beginning of their relationship, in those first couple of idyllic months where they’d been wrapped in a kind of hazy couple bubble, they used to make love every day. Liam hadn’t been able to get enough of her and she had relished in the mind-blowing sexual chemistry they shared. And then, something had changed. Even before their impromptu wedding...Kayla had felt herself pulling away. As the sex and desire turned into something more, into a deep kind of love, she had begun to slowly close down. Because in her heart, she knew they were heading toward the impossible. She began spending more and more time at her apartment, using work and the upcoming benefit as a reason to put distance and build a wall between them, until there was very little left of their relationship that resembled those first weeks they’d been together.
“I’ve missed you, too,” she admitted and inhaled the scent of him.
Liam tensed, almost as though the words caused him pain. “Let’s go inside.”
He released her, stepped aside to grab the grocery bag and opened the front door. Peanuts came meowing the moment they crossed the threshold and Kayla stooped down to pet the cat before she headed to the kitchen. Liam was behind her in seconds and dumped the bag on the counter.
There was suddenly a restlessness in the air between them. Kayla watched him, his shoulders tight, his impassive features giving nothing away. “What happened with your father?”
He shrugged. “He didn’t deny it.”
“Did you expect him to?”
“I’m not sure what I expected,” he replied.
Kayla rested against the countertop. “My dad said that it had been going on for a few months before he found out. He and your father were friends...best friends. This is what came between them. Kathleen was my dad’s little sister. Your father was thirty-one at the time, and my aunt eighteen. Did you know that she was your babysitter?”
“I remember,” he said quietly.
Kayla nodded. “You would have been about five and Kieran three-and-a-half. My mother said Liz was still a baby and your mom was probably pregnant with Sean...you know...when it all happened.”
“It kinda all adds to the whole sordid story, doesn’t it?”
She felt his pain through to the roots of her hair. “I’m so sorry Liam... I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. And I can’t fathom how difficult it’s going to be trying to keep this from getting out.”
He stilled and stared at her. “Getting out?”
“Your mom,” she said quickly. “She doesn’t know. She never knew about the affair. That’s why Kathleen left town. That’s why she had her baby in secret and why it’s been kept that way for thirty years...to protect your mom and four innocent children.” Kayla saw Liam’s hard expression and knew he wasn’t convinced. “Everyone believed my father and yours had fallen out over a business deal gone bad. No one knew the truth and my parents promised your father they wouldn’t say anything.”
“It didn’t stop them from letting it all out of the bag today, though, did it?”
She nodded and touched her belly. “I think finding out about us being married and the baby and everything, it just spilled out. Let’s face it, things were pretty heated between you and my dad for a few minutes and it was as though something had to give. I’m sure they felt bad once you left, especially my mom. And I tried to talk with them after you’d gone. Even though my dad shut down and would hardly speak to me. That’s why I stayed this afternoon—I wanted to find out what really happened.”
“I thought you stayed because you were choosing sides.”
“Sides?” she echoed.
“Sure,” he replied. “Your family on one side, mine on the other. Let’s face it, Kayla, your father is never going to accept us being together. He made that very clear today.”
“He was angry.”
“I know,” he shot back. “And he has every right considering what happened with his sister and my dad. But right now he’s not the issue. We are.”
“I don’t understand what you—”
“We’re married,” he said with emphasis.
And he was angry. Furious. With her and probably at the world in that moment.
“I know that.”
He expelled a heavy breath. “If you know that, why didn’t you leave with me this afternoon?”
Shame clicked at her heels. He was right. Part of her knew that. But her divided loyalties made making that choice impossible. “They needed me to—”
“I needed you,” he fired back. “Which means you have to make a decision... Be daddy’s little girl, or be my wife.”
She tried to ignore both the insult and the ultimatum in his words. And failed. “I’m here,” she said and gestured to the house around them. “Aren’t I?”
“I don’t know,” he said flatly. “Are you? And are you here for just tonight? Or maybe two? You know, I’m not exactly sure what being married should feel like, but I’m pretty sure this isn’t it.” He made a scoffing sound. “I suppose that’s what you get when you marry someone on a foolish whim one insanely passionate weekend in Vegas.”
Kayla’s feet were suddenly entrenched in cement and regret licked over her skin. “You heard me say that to Lucy this morning?”
“I did.”
Guilt pressed between her shoulders. “I shouldn’t have said it. I shouldn’t have made light of our marriage. It was insensitive and stupid and—”
“And a bit like saying you wanted a divorce, right?”
She groaned. “Okay, you’re right. All I’ve done for the past twenty-four hours is make one thoughtless remark after another. I just don’t know what to do and—”
“This is what you do!” he shot back. “You act like a grown-up, like someone in charge of her own life—and not like a spoiled child afraid of her parents’ disapproval.” His cheeks were suddenly slashed with color. “But I guess when you’ve spent your life doing exactly what you’re told, having an authentic thought of your own is pretty much impossible.”
Kayla stepped back. It was out. Just what he thought. For months the words had been unsaid between them. Liam had been tiptoeing around his feelings and she had clamped her hands over her ears, unwilling to hear anything that resembled criticism. The news of J.D. O’Sullivan’s infidelity and the secret of Kathleen’s child had somehow become a catalyst—a symbol of everything that was wrong in their relationship.
“I can’t take sides,” she admitted, aching inside. “You know I can’t knowingly hurt people.”
“No?” His brows came up.
“You don’t count,” she said and then quickly realized how bad it sounded and backtracked immediately. “I mean, of course you count... I only mean—”
“I know exactly what you mean, Kayla,” he said, so softly that it was worse than if he’d lost his temper. “You and your parents are this tight little unit and nothing gets in between that. But you’re forgetting one thing,” he continued, his eyes dark and glitteringly intense. “You’re carrying my baby and I won’t allow you to put a wall up between me and my child. Not ever. You think you know me, right? Let’s see how well you know me if you try and stop me from seeing my son or daughter.”
He sounded cold, ruthless...nothing like the man she’d grown to love over the past five months. But she also knew he was hurting and didn’t need her histrionics, regardless of how tempted she was to tell him to go to the devil for being such an arrogant ass. He’d just discovered that his father had cheated on his mother and that he had a near thirty-year-old half brother. It wasn’t rocket science to figure he wanted to lash out at whoever was in the firing line.
“I would never try to keep you from your child, Liam.”
“Not even if it means defying your father’s wishes?”
She sucked in a sharp breath. “I’m not a puppet, Liam. Nor am I as weak-willed as you seem to think. I’ll do what’s best for our child. Our child,” she repeated with emphasis. “And maybe you won’t always agree with my choices...and that’s okay...because I don’t always agree with you, either.”
His mouth twisted and he sucked in a long breath. “Okay... I guess that’s settled.”
She nodded. “I’m going to make dinner,” she said quietly and moved around the countertop. “Why don’t you take a shower and try to relax.”
“I’m relaxed enough.”
She grinned a little. “Sure you are.”
“I don’t need to relax,” he said irritably. “What I need is...is... I need...” He stopped speaking and looked at her. “I don’t know what the hell I need. Maybe a do-over of today for starters.” He ran a frustrated hand through his hair. “Anyway, you’re the one who should be relaxing... Doctor’s orders, remember?”
“I feel fine,” she assured him. “Perfectly healthy.”
He didn’t exactly look convinced, but he nodded. “I think I will hit the shower.”
Kayla watched him leave, heard him take the stairs and a few minutes later registered the faint hiss of the upstairs shower.
She began preparing dinner and was dicing tomatoes for the sauce when there was a knock on the door. Kayla wiped her hands and headed down the hallway. The sun had just set and as she opened the door she blinked a few times to adjust her sight to the sensor light now illuminating the porch.
Gwen O’Sullivan stood on the other side of the screen.
Tall, blue-eyed and still strikingly attractive, Liam’s mother was a kind and generous woman—Kayla knew that firsthand from how much time and money she’d donated to both the hospital and the museum over the years. She had a warm spirit and was highly respected in town.
She took a deep breath, steeled herself for an inevitable inquisition and unlocked the screen door. “Hello, Mrs. O’Sullivan.”
“Kayla,” the older woman said and crossed the threshold. “I heard you were taken to the hospital this morning? I trust you’re recovered now?”
“Fully,” Kayla replied. “I fainted, but I feel fine now. I’ve been a little too busy to focus on eating right the past few days.”
“I’m pleased to hear you’re feeling better.” She paused, the awkward moment hanging between them. “I’d like to speak with Liam if he’s here.”
“He is. He’s in the shower,” she explained and then colored hotly, feeling foolish and self-conscious at the implied intimacy in her words. “He shouldn’t be too long.”
By the time they stepped into the living area Kayla could feel heat rising up her neck at the other woman’s close scrutiny. Gwen moved across the room and stood by the huge fireplace. The silence was uncomfortable, and she was about to break the ice by mentioning the weather when Liam’s mother spoke.
“So, is it true that you’re married to my son?”
“Yes.”
“Do your parents know?”
“They do.”
“I imagine they’re not thrilled by the idea?”
“Not especially,” Kayla replied. “But I’m sure they’ll come around.”
“I hope they do,” Gwen said and sighed, dropping her gaze to Kayla’s abdomen for a moment. “And are you pregnant?” she asked bluntly. “I only ask because my husband said something to Liam today and my son didn’t deny it. J.D. assumed that your pregnancy is the reason you married.”
She shook her head. “It’s not. We only found out about the baby—”
“Yesterday.” Liam’s deep voice cut through her explanation and she turned on her heels. He came through the doorway, dressed in faded jeans and a black T-shirt. With his feet bare, his hair damp and his jaw cleanly shaven, he looked utterly masculine and sexy. “Hello, Mom. It’s good to see you.”
Gwen came across the room and gave him a swift but affectionate hug and then resumed her place by the hearth. “I won’t deny that I was surprised when your father told me about your marriage.” Her brows came up in a way that immediately reminded Kayla of Liam. “Considering our conversation at the hotel the other day. You remember the one?” she queried, brows still arched. “Where I said it was time you got married and settled down and you muttered something about having no time or inclination...or something like that.”
Liam shrugged. “We had our reasons for keeping quiet.”
“No doubt...but deception has never been your strong suit, Liam. It’s one of things I admire most about you. Even as a child you always told the absolute truth.”
“It was my doing, Mrs. O’Sullivan,” Kayla said quickly. “I insisted we wait.”
“You should probably call me Gwen,” the older woman said. “Considering you’re now my daughter-in-law. I suppose this came about because you’ve been spending so much time together working on the benefit and the plans to extend the museum?”
“Something like that,” he replied flatly. “So, you spoke to Dad?” Liam asked, flipping the subject.
“Yes,” Gwen replied. “And although neither of us approve of the cloak-and-dagger way you went about everything, it’s done now and we all need to make the best of it. Especially since there is a child involved. Children are precious and should be protected...no matter what.”
As the other woman spoke, Kayla instantly understood her parents’ motives for maintaining such secrecy around her aunt’s affair with Liam’s father. Gwen O’Sullivan was a good person, sincere and compassionate, and she clearly adored her son. Thirty years ago Kayla’s parents had agreed to keep J.D.’s infidelity a secret to ensure the O’Sullivan children were raised in a secure and loving home. Some things, she suspected, were best kept unsaid.
“Mom,” Liam’s voice refocused her attention. “What else did Dad tell you?”
“Else?” she echoed. “Only that you rushed out of your meeting this morning with Derek’s lawyer and went to the hospital, and that you came to the house this afternoon and said you were married to Kayla.”
“And that’s all?”
“Yes. Why?”
Kayla saw Liam’s shoulders twitch. His expression was blank. His eyes as dark as she’d ever seen them. The tension emanating from him was palpable and she instinctively knew what was about to happen.
And she also knew she had to do something about it. Before it was too late.