49.

A Shaman Endures the Temptation of Sorcery (and Publishes a Book)

FERNANDO PAYAGUAJE

 

(1990)

 

 

 

For three years, three young Secoya Indians interviewed their grandfather Fernando Payaguaje, a yagé (ayahuasca) shaman. They transcribed hundreds of pages in Secoya, then edited them and translated them to Spanish, and published a small book in his name called The Yagé Drinker. It is one of the clearest books on ayahuasca shamanism, though as yet not translated into English. The shaman’s three nephews are Alfredo Payaguaje, Marcelino Lucitande, and Jorge Lucitande.

 

 

To be able to graduate, one needs to drink yagé at least fifteen times over several months. After that, one should be able to cure any kind of illness. But to get to that stage, one must endure much deprivation and suffering.

For example, I was married, and could not sleep with my wife; if I wanted to be the best and most knowledgeable healer, I could not visit her. I was in another house near her, preparing yagé and drinking it without cease, as my obligation was to perfect myself more and more. This also happens later on, the healer often suffers from not being able to look after his family; there are times when he must stay away, because he has to maintain himself in good condition and look after his health. He is not allowed to use a dish used by a pregnant woman, and he must also keep at a distance from her; if he does not respect these requirements, he will have headaches and other pains. The same occurs if the woman is menstruating; in that case, she has to remain hidden and keep apart from her husband until it passes. Then she must wash with hot water, guaba leaves, and other leaves; if she does that she will be able to give her husband food once again. Women should also avoid walking near the yagé house during a ceremony, and they should preferably stay inside their house; otherwise the masters of fish and of the forest animals will not respond to the yagé ’s call. They must also withdraw when the yagé is cooking. All of these rules are for women. However, they may drink yagé and be healers, and it is good if they can heal bites and other things, when their family is suffering.

While one drinks yagé, one keeps a severe food diet. There are few fish that one may eat, and the same is true of meats. One should also avoid ripe hot peppers, and eat only unripe ones, and so on; if one eats just any kind of food, one learns nothing. This is why one must be patient and endure deprivation. Often you have to stay in your house without going visiting, so that no one offers you prohibited foods; what is more, apprentices need a new cooking pot of their own. Their hammock needs to be well guarded: If they leave the house, they tie it up high so that no women or visitors use it. The master warns them of all this. Otherwise, if they return to the house, bathe, and lie down in a badly used hammock, they could suffer pains, and lose the power of visions. That is why they must protect themselves. . . .

Some people drink yagé only to the point of reaching the power to practice witchcraft; with these crafts they can kill people. A much greater effort and consumption of yagé are required to reach the highest level, where one gains access to the visions and power of healing. To become a sorcerer is easy and fast. I did not aspire to that, but to become the most wise and knowledgeable; my idea was to attain leadership of a big family or clan, some ten or twenty families, and to be able to look after them and heal them all. It was only with this idea in mind that I found the strength to reach the highest level. . . .

One is sitting in the hammock but, at the same time, one is in another world, seeing the truth of all that exists; only the body remains postrate. The angels arrive and they offer you a flute; you play it, as it is not the healer who teaches, but they themselves who make us sing when we are drunk. How fine it is to see the totality of animals, even those who live under water! How could it not be beautiful to distinguish even the people who live inside the earth? One can see everything, that is why it is fascinating to drink yagé.

But it is not simple. On drinking thick yagé, I managed to see the sun, the rainbow . . . everything; the vision ended and I noted that my heart was hot, like a recently burned pan. I could feel the heat inside, burning me; even without working I sweated all day. Continuous visions assaulted me, I sweated and I bathed myself very often. I felt able to practice witchcraft and to kill others, even though I never did, because my father’s advice contained me: “If you use that power now, you could kill someone, but then you would never get over being a sorcerer.”

In those days I dedicated myself to yagé; I went to visit Cuyabeno and returned home to hear similar warnings: “When you feel a bit drunk, you must rise above the anger that comes over you; do not become violent and do not harm anybody,” my father said.

“No, I will know how to contain myself,” I said.

For days I put up with that heat; I remember drowning in sweat, that is the dangerous moment for the person who is preparing himself: One should not even look straight at people, but only listen to them.

“Now I will bring another kind of yagé,” said my father. “The time has come to try it.”

We prepared it good and thick, and upon drinking it, he removed those arrows I had inside me; I stopped sweating and became like a child. That is how my father pulled out the violence from me so I would not practice sorcery, but learn to heal instead. At that instant I moved up in grade: Now I could see sorcerers as clearly as the sun; the healers were mirrors. That way, when I settled in the Cuyabeno area, I was able to discover a Siona sorcerer from Río Aguarico; sorcerers do not look at people face to face; they stand as if they were ducking. That is the kind of person who brought about so many fights in the past.