Chapter 5

Matthias stiffened, his senses on alert as he awoke to the eerie sensation of someone watching him.

He slowly opened his eyes, then blinked, rearing his head back a little to allow his eyes to focus. Two blue eyes, innocent and watchful, hovered an inch from his face.

“I need to pee,” Jax whispered.

Matthias blinked again, then nodded. “Okay,” he whispered back.

He rolled to a sitting position, and looked at the other side of the tent. It was still dimly lit inside, but he could make out her form. The tracker lay curled up on her side, as though she was trying to roll into herself. Her chest rose and fell in a regular rhythm, and his lips tilted at the softest snore she emitted. She’d turned over during the night, and now lay facing him, her face softened and flushed with sleep.

Something unfurled deep inside him, a warmth that battled momentarily between lust and protectiveness, and he was surprised when his urge to safeguard won. He didn’t want to care. It felt wrong, to Alpine, but most of all to Cara. He backed out of the tent without his usual grace, anxious to get away from the threat to his peace of mind. Outside, the night sky was lightening to a golden gray, and most of his guardians still slept.

“Come on,” Matthias said to the kid, jerking his head toward a trail. He walked toward the ring of trees, and startled when a little hand slid in to hold his own. For a moment, something hard and brittle rose within, but when he looked down, that brittleness shattered when Jax looked up at him and smiled.

“Can we go hunt?” the boy asked.

Matthias arched an eyebrow. “I thought you needed to pee.”

“Then can we hunt?” Jax asked eagerly. He dodged a branch, pulling down on Matthias’s hand as he jumped over it. “I didn’t break it,” he told Matthias proudly.

He frowned. He had no idea what the kid was going on about. “Didn’t break what?”

“The branch.” Jax ducked around another one. “Trin says the less you break, the harder it is to track you.”

“Really? What else does Trin say?” He kept his tone casual as he led the boy over to a tree, and gestured, turning his back to go and relieve himself a little distance away. He couldn’t deny that he was fascinated by the tracker.

“She says the forest can be your friend.”

“Uh-huh.” He supposed a tracker would see it like that.

“She says not to hit Mia, even if she’s asking for it.”

Matthias finished zipping up his pants and waited for the boy to join him. “Who’s Mia?”

Jax frowned. “She’s in my class, but she’s mean. She’s always going on about her dad.”

“Why is that a problem?” Matthias asked as he led the boy through some more trees, until he reached the bank of a river. He could smell the sweet scent of the water, and they both knelt down. Matthias leaned forward to wash his hands.

“She’s always rubbing it in, that’s all,” Jax muttered, his lips turned down in a pout. An air of sadness crept over the little boy, one that Matthias didn’t fully understand but could easily recognize.

“What does your dad say about it?” he asked quietly, and found himself thinking for the first time what the boy’s parents must be going through, with their pup held by a warring pack, what Trinity’s family would be experiencing. He could easily remember that panic, that agonizing, gut-wrenching dread that could be so consuming as to drive all rational thought out of a parent’s mind.

“My dad’s dead,” Jax said quietly.

Matthias paused, then sank back on his haunches. “How long?”

Jax shrugged. “Not long.”

“And your mother?” Matthias found himself asking, a little knot of tension solidifying like a stone deep in his gut.

Jax blinked and ducked his head. “She’s sad.”

Relief, slow and cool, swamped the stone to bury it. At least he still had his mom. “I’m sorry,” he said, looking down at the sandy-haired boy. “It’s hard when you lose family.” He almost rolled his eyes. What a damned understatement. He tried again. “I mean, I get it.”

Jax lifted his head to look at him, his eyes luminous with unshed tears. Something passed between them, a recognition of shared misery that traversed ages.

Jax nodded, then blinked furiously as he looked down at the rippling waters of the river. Matthias didn’t know what made him do it, but he flicked a small amount of water at the boy. Jax squealed as he leaned back, gasping at the chill of the water, and Matthias smiled.

“This river comes down from my territory,” he told the boy. “It tastes good, too.”

He leaned over to scoop some water up in his hand and took a few sips. Jax watched for a moment, then tried to do the same. Matthias’s arm flashed out and caught the back of his sweater as the boy nearly toppled into the river. “Like this,” he said, and showed the boy where to plant his feet, then nodded approvingly when Jax successfully sipped water from his own cupped hands. “Good job.”

He sat back against the sandy bank, drawing his legs up and resting his arms loosely across the tops of his knees. The river flowed quietly past, with an occasional gurgle as it tumbled over rocks. The sky was turning a peachy orange as the sun began to creep over the tops of the mountains in the distance, and birds twittered as they swooped down for a drink.

Matthias sighed. He enjoyed this time of the day, so peaceful. So tranquil. It gave him a chance to breathe, to thin—

“Oof,” he wheezed as a little body launched at his back. Jax held on with his legs, his hands covering Matthias’s eyes from behind.

“Gotcha,” the boy chortled.

Matthias twisted, pulling the boy up over his shoulders and flipping him over, making sure he landed on his feet. For a few moments they wrestled, and Matthias enjoyed hearing the boy’s giggles. The memories they brought forth were bittersweet, but today, they were bearable.

He smelled her before he heard her, turning around as Trinity burst through the reeds that lined the river. Her panicked gaze subsided into relief when she saw Jax was safe and sound and doing his best to trip Matthias over. Zane crashed through the undergrowth behind her, his gaze fierce until he saw his guardian prime. Matthias set the boy back a little, and adopted a stern expression. Jax grinned back as he turned to face his teacher, breathless.

“Good morning,” Matthias said smoothly, folding his arms.

“Hey, Trin,” Jax said, giving her a little wave.

“Jax, I was worried about you,” she said, and Matthias could hear the edge in her voice. He arched his brow.

“He was with me,” he told her. That should have soothed her fears. She glanced away, toward the river, as though trying to hide her reaction.

“I needed to pee,” Jax told her.

She nodded, holding up her hand. “Fine. Just—just don’t go anywhere without telling me, okay, Jax?” He nodded, running over to hug her. She sighed as she bent down to enfold her arms around him, and smiled at the lad. “You are giving me gray hairs, boy,” she said, and ruffled his sandy-blond hair.

“Jax, go back to camp with Zane. He’ll get you something to eat,” Matthias said, and Zane nodded, then reached out to take the boy’s hand. Trinity turned to follow, but Matthias shook his head. “No, you can stay.”

She halted, gazing after the boy for a moment. Jax started asking Zane questions, and Matthias had to fight the smile as he heard them chattering back to camp. Well, Jax was chattering, and Zane was responding with monosyllabic grunts. When Trinity turned to face him, he quickly masked his smile beneath a determined frown.

“We need to talk.”

* * *

Trinity gazed back out over the river, for once not really noticing the beauty of the unfolding sunrise. She scanned the opposite side of the river. The ground rose sharply into a craggy bluff. On the other side lay Nightwing, and just beyond that, the rising rain forest that gave way to the Alpine territory. The ridge dipped and rose, a natural border between werewolves and vampires. And yet, their enemy had still managed to camp in Woodland.

She hugged herself tightly before turning to face Matthias. “What?” she asked, impatient. She didn’t care how rude she sounded. She wanted to go back to Jax. She’d been so worried for him when she’d awoken alone in the tent. To find him playing with the guardian prime—well, she was still trying to process that one. He stared at her with that green, enigmatic gaze, the one that seemed to elevate her heart rate, curl her toes and reach in and stir the ashes of arousal. He was so intense, so unashamed by his curiosity of her. He didn’t try to hide his keen interest at all, as he tilted his head, surveying her.

“You really were worried for him,” he said slowly, his eyes narrowed.

She frowned. “Of course I was. I had no idea where he was, where you were.”

“Your concern is like that of a parent, yet you’re not his mother,” he observed. The muscles in her shoulders tightened.

“Jax has had a rough time lately.”

Matthias nodded. “He told me. How did his father die?”

Sadness fluttered around her. Jax’s father’s death was unnecessary and avoidable, and marked one of those times when her pack didn’t behave nicely. “He was killed by the dentist,” she admitted quietly. The man wrongly accused of killing his alpha, the one Rafe had used to hide his own involvement in the crime.

Matthias dipped his head, and the sun peeked over the edge of the ridge, bathing him in a golden light tinged with rose. He was silent for a moment, then grimaced. “His mother isn’t coping?”

Trinity shook her head, surprised at his interest. “She’s pining.” She leaned down and picked a flat stone off the sandy bank, hefting it in her hand. “She’s got an adoring son, and she’s locking herself up in her room.” Trinity hurled the stone and it landed in the river with a distinct plunk. She’d seen it before. Some lycans never recovered from the loss of their mate, gradually fading into the shadows until they finally passed, joining their loved one on the Other Side.

“She’s mourning,” Matthias said, and picked up a stone.

“Well, she should get over it,” Trinity muttered as she located another rock to hurl. She knew she sounded harsh, but she didn’t care. The old anger and frustration rose swiftly, and her fingers tightened around the unforgiving stone in her hand.

Matthias frowned at her. “Sometimes it’s not that easy, especially if they were mates.” He threw the stone, and it skipped a few times across the river before falling below the surface.

Trinity cursed softly as she turned on her side and flung the stone. “The amount of times I’ve heard that as an excuse for giving up.” Tears itched below her eyelids, and she blinked. Damn it, she was over it now. That was all water under the bridge. “Losing a mate shouldn’t have to mean losing yourself, especially if a child is depending on you.”

He laughed, but she couldn’t hear any humor in the sound. “Says someone who has never had a mate, obviously.”

“Why would you want one?” she exclaimed softly, and her shoulders sagged. “Jax has lost his father, and his mother doesn’t see him.” She shook her head. No pup should feel invisible.

“Maybe you should cut her some slack,” Matthias suggested, his tone dark. “You can’t know what she’s going through. Give her some time.”

Anger seared through her. She’d heard that before, too. And all her teenage years hadn’t been enough time for healing. Trinity frowned as she faced him. “Why are you defending her? Why do you care? She’s the enemy, remember. You’re Alpine.”

Matthias placed his hands on his hips as he faced her, his frown harsh. “And yet I’m not the one who sounds heartless right now.”

Shock at his words snapped at her heart. Heartless? He had no idea what he was talking about. She cared. She cared deeply; she cared so much it damn well hurt. She’d seen loss, she’d felt so much stupid, cruel loss, and she’d seen senseless loss. Pining was senseless to her. It was a slow, painful form of suicide. The ring against his chest glinted as he turned to face the river, the muscles in his jaw flickering as he bit down. He was angry?

She shook her head. “Is this what you wanted to talk about? Jax’s parents?” Surely the big, ruthless guardian prime had more important issues to involve himself with than a pup from the enemy pack.

He tightened his lips as though biting off a retort, then took a calming breath before he turned his head to look at her. Even now she could see the anger blazing in those green depths.

“How many day’s trek is it from here to the den?”

She sucked in a breath. Great. Now they were back to that. She almost preferred talking about that old chestnut, parents giving up on their children.

She gazed about the peaceful scene, so at odds with the turmoil inside her. Hell, what to tell him? She didn’t want to take him to the den—she couldn’t take him to the den. Not only because it would put her pack at risk, and she never wanted to do something like that, but also because her pack would never forgive her. She already had one sin, one shame darkening her standing within the pack. She lived in hope that one day they’d forgive her, that one day they would look at her, really look at her, and smile kindly.

But if she did this she’d be cast out of the pack, if any of them remained after a skirmish with the Alpine guardians.

“With Jax, and your wounded guardians, about three days trekking,” she lied.

His eyebrows rose. “That far? Why were you training the pups so far from home?”

Oops. Good point. It had only taken them a few hours yesterday to reach the Alpine camp. “It’s a Woodland tradition. When they turn four we do a training mission.” Well, that sounded lame, even to her own ears.

Matthias looked at her for a moment. Please buy it. Please buy it. He finally nodded. “Fine. We’ll head out after breakfast.”

He’d bought it. Great. Now she just had to figure out how to lose them.

* * *

Matthias trudged alongside Trinity. She’d set a grueling pace, and they’d been walking along the base of the ridge.

“When we get to the break in the hills, we’ll set up camp,” he told her, eyeing his guardians. Some were helping the injured, and while they were all fit, he didn’t want them tired if they met up with any Woodland guardians. They’d set up camp early and continue the next day after a full night’s rest. Like in the mountainous Alpine territory, the sun set early here in the Woodland mountains. It was already getting dark, although not once had Trinity complained about the hours they’d spent walking through the forest. It was almost as though she was used to day-long hikes in the woods.

She nodded and kept on walking, her eyes on the trail ahead. Well, he couldn’t see a trail, but somehow she managed to follow one through the trees. He looked back at Zane. His second-in-command looked pained as Jax chattered along beside him. The boy hadn’t stopped talking all day, unless it was to eat or drink. They’d each taken turns carrying the child, and the boy wasn’t shy with any of them. Matthias hid his smile. Hearing the young boy’s chirpy comments made him realize how much he missed the babble of a curious kid. His lips drooped. He couldn’t think along those lines, though. There was too much pain.

Speaking of pain...he glanced sideways at the tracker. She’d seemed so caring, so nurturing with the boy, yet her harsh remarks that morning about Jax’s mother had surprised him. He frowned. Could she really be that young, that inexperienced that she could think one could easily get over the death of a mate? Her words had ripped open old wounds for him. He could totally understand the desolation, the heartbreaking loneliness Jax’s mother must be feeling, the emptiness that had taken root in her soul at the death of her mate. How could Trinity not understand? Or at least empathize?

He frowned. Since when did he care about caring, for crud’s sake? What did it matter to him how naive and foolish the tracker seemed? He wondered, though, if she would have said the same things to him if she’d known of his history. He glanced around the guardians who marched along with him. Most of them knew, but even so, none of them knew all of the details, all of the tragic consequences. Even Jared hadn’t known the full story.

Would they view him differently if they knew? Would they still follow him so loyally, trust in him so blindly? He ducked his head. Would they think he wasn’t fit to be one of them?

Trinity stumbled a little, and cried out in pain. In a flash he reached for her, clasping her arm, and she startled, looking at him over her shoulder.

“Are you okay?” he asked, trying to keep the concern, the care out of his voice.

“Uh, yeah. I, uh, I have a rock in my shoe.” She waved him on. “You go on. I’ll catch up. I just need to take my shoe off and tip it out.” She sat down on a fallen tree and slowly started to unlace her boot. He hesitated, and she raised an eyebrow. She gestured to the group of guardians following. “I’m not going to run, not with all you guys around.”

He shot her an exasperated look, then turned to lead on. Jax ran up to the tracker, his expression curious, and Zane tilted his head in relief as he caught up to Matthias.

“That kid is exhausting. He talks, and talks, and, well, talks.”

Matthias nodded as they approached a rocky outcropping. “It’s good that he feels comfortable to do that,” he told his guardian quietly.

Zane sighed. “Yeah, I guess. He’s so young, though. He wants to play a lot.”

“He’s a pup. That’s what they do.” He remembered a pup just like Jax, with sandy hair and a cheeky grin. They rounded the rocky edge, stepping into the gloom cast by the mountain’s shadow. Night was coming. A movement caught his eye, and Matthias put his hand out, halting Zane.

Deep in the shadows cast by the trees and the mountain behind them stood four men. All tall, all wearing dark clothes, with pale skin and the faint yet unmistakable scent of death.

Matthias’s lips curled. Vamps.