Slow Down Your Thinking
to Speed Up Your Progress
You have an important job interview scheduled, or a big meeting coming up with the boss or with an important client. You’ve done your homework and you’re prepared, primed, and pumped up.
But have you thought about your thinking speed?
We all know that interviews and high-stakes meetings can be very stressful, and when nerves flare up our tendency is to think and talk too fast, leading to our potentially blowing that meeting that we prepared so long and so hard for.
In his best-selling, award-winning book Thinking, Fast and Slow, Daniel Kahneman takes a deep dive into how we think, and shows us how we can be more effective…simply by slowing down. According to Kahneman, one of the biggest problems is that we tend to think too fast—especially when under stress.
When your brain reacts automatically and instinctively, almost thinking without really thinking, that’s what Kahneman calls “thinking fast.” This is how we think most of the time. On the other hand, “thinking slow” is when your brain hits the pause button and takes a brief moment to consciously reason, consider, question, analyze, and decide—and then responds.
Of course, “thinking fast” is a good thing. We couldn’t possibly—and wouldn’t want to—have to overanalyze every single thought before responding. But, on the flip side, how often do we make mistakes motivated by knee-jerk reactions, or sudden jumps to conclusions, when we might have benefited from one momentary pause to devise a more well-considered response?
With that said, how can you leverage the power of “thinking slow” when on the spot in your next meeting, job interview, or high-pressure situation?
One simple and powerful way to do so is by harnessing the storytelling framework called “PARLA” (Problem, Action, Result, Learning, and Application) that I mentioned earlier.
Let’s say a job interviewer asks you, “Can you tell me about a time when you faced a similar situation?” Or you’re in a sales meeting and the potential client asks, “Have you ever worked with a company like ours before?” In either scenario, you might use the PARLA method to structure your five-part response as follows:
P—Problem: Let me tell you about the time I faced a similar situation…
A—Action: Here’s the action I took…
R—Result: Here’s the outcome of that action…
L—Learning: Here’s what I learned…
A—Application: And—this is the most important and relevant part to the listener—here’s how I would apply this Learning in the future…
Very often, when an interviewer or a potential client asks us a question, we excitedly blurt out, in our excitement to win them over, something like, “Because I have a degree in x, and ten years’ experience, and I’m a hard worker, and a team player, and blah blah blah.” Not only are we thinking fast, we’re talking fast, and often just rambling on and on. And that’s exactly what so many people do.
Instead, why not try to differentiate yourself by taking a breath…and a brief, two-second pause…followed by a confident, PARLA-based story that will make you stand out from the crowd.
For example, one time a potential new client asked me “How much experience do you have working with millennials?”
My PARLA-structured response:
Problem: I’ve definitely spent a lot of time working with millennials! In fact, I teach a graduate course in ‘Leadership & Team Building’ in the HR master’s program at NYU—and most of my students are millennials. And I’ve worked with a number of tech start-ups that have primarily millennial populations.
Action: One of the things I always ensure when training millennials is to keep things as fast-paced, varied, and highly-interactive and experiential as possible.
Result: I’ve found that when I do, as with any population, it dramatically increases the workshop attendees’ attention, comprehension, and retention.
Learning: So, every one of my training programs is designed and delivered with our “3 E’s”—Educate, Engage, and Excite—in mind.
Application: As such, I would definitely make sure that any leadership programs we create for your organization would be highly interactive and experiential as well.
It’s that simple: PARLA.
By the way, in regard to the story you choose to tell to illustrate your experience and capability, the “P” for “Problem” that you describe simply refers to the challenge, issue, situation, or opportunity that you faced.
Also, even if things didn’t go well in the Results phase of your example, what’s most important is that you took an Action to address a Problem, and that you Learned something valuable from it that you can now Apply going forward. And, in truth, that’s really what the interviewer or potential client is hoping to hear: based on your prior experience, whether you have the capability to do the job.
Lastly, PARLA is not just a storytelling technique to use when being interviewed; it is actually a classic technique that an interviewer may use to question you! So, if an interviewer ever begins a question with, “Tell me about a time when…” you will now immediately recognize that that is what they’re doing…and what they are looking for in terms of a response. Not to give away any behind-the-scenes interviewing secrets, but now that you are aware of this popular methodology, you will be better prepared to take a breath and respond on the spot.
Ideally, when going into any meeting or interview, it’s beneficial to have done your homework in advance and come prepared with a few relevant sample stories to share that will serve to bring your point to life and get people to “see what you’re saying.” But even if you feel unprepared or on-the-spot, if you can visualize the PARLA framework in your mind’s eye, it will enable you to formulate a powerful and effective response in a moment’s time.
Telling a well-structured personal story using the PARLA format will capture your listener’s attention, bring your experience to life, show that you can think on your feet, and demonstrate with poise and confidence that you have what it takes to do the job…because you’ve been there before.
And that’s the power of “thinking slow” in action.
In Review
The Big Lesson: Sometimes the fastest way to get your point across is to momentarily slow things down.
The Big Question: What is a situation in which the PARLA storytelling technique might come in handy for you? What are some stories you can formulate in advance to prepare yourself for the next time you need to show someone what you can do?
Your Big Insight:
Your Big Action: