The night before I am to testify in front of a grand jury I had this dream . . .
I was in this interview room with Phillip and Nancy. Phillip was behind this big desk to my right and Nancy was sitting in a smaller desk straight in front of me. I was sitting in a swivel chair in the center of the room. Phillip was asking me all these question that I can’t remember and I was smirking at him and telling him I wasn’t going to answer any of his questions because I didn’t have to. He then said it looked like I needed a hug and when he started to get up, I yelled for the officer who was supposed to be right outside the door. When the officer doesn’t come, I immediately rise and say you can’t come near me and I make my way to the door. I go down the hall to find the officer that was supposed to be guarding me in the room. He is with another officer and he is in his underwear saying he was sorry but he needed to get dressed. Then I woke up.
To me this is a dream about how it is hard for me to trust in law enforcement. They weren’t there when I needed them, therefore, in the dream they are not there for me. Knowing this and thinking this are two different things for me. I know when I go into the grand jury room I will be well protected and cared for. On the other hand, the government failed me for eighteen years. And that will take time to heal from.