I was strolling along South Freedom Beach in the company of my lifelong friend, the Assistant District Attorney Skip Wilder. Both of us were barefoot, wearing baggy canvas shorts and, although unplanned, Freedom High sweatshirts.
For privacy reasons Wilder had suggested we meet on this remote stretch of undeveloped shoreline, a favorite haunt of our youth. The sun felt warm on our pale winter faces, a harbinger, perhaps, of summer to come.
I picked up a small rock and hurled it into the sea, then turned to face him. “I need an opinion.”
“Find a new line of work.”
“Funny.”
“So, what’s up?”
“The Sheriff’s Department was asked to work with the Coastal Commission to help rectify a problem.”
“The Commission needs help in enforcing the law?”
“Here in San Remo County? Yes.”
“So?”
“It’s more problematic than they had let on.”
“Problematic how?”
“There’s an access violation which the homeowner is refusing to acknowledge.”
“So, warrant the sucker and do what you need to do.”
“Easier said than done.”
“Because?”
“Boris Petrov is because.”
“Boris Petrov?”
“Him.”
“Him and his team of legal pit bulls, you mean.”
“Here’s the conundrum, Skip. Petrov’s attorneys are bringing suit to prevent the Commission from upholding the law.”
“What a nifty concept.”
“So, what do I do?”
“What does your gut tell you to do?”
“Tear down the fences and open the access points.”
“So, do it.”
“And the lawsuit?”
“Not your problem.”
“What do you mean?”
“If you’re asking my legal opinion, I’m opining that you’d be defending and upholding the existing laws, and if Mr. Petrov is unhappy about it, tough noogies. Let him take on the Coastal Commission, the State of California, hell, even the Easter Bunny, for all I care. You’re well within your rights.”
“And you’ll stand behind this opinion?”
“I never said that.”
“Come on, Skip. Will you stand behind it?”
“Look, Buddy. You asked me here to render an opinion. I’m not here in any official capacity. Before I could officially render an opinion, I’d have to consult the District Attorney and possibly even the State’s Attorney.”
“So this was a big waste of time.”
“Not in the least. You can trust my opinion. You just can’t reference it as justification for any action you might take.”
“Lawyers,” I muttered. “No wonder you’re reviled.”
“Also revered.”
“Maybe in some quarters.”
“You can fool some of the people some of the time,” Wilder snickered.