Maddy walked up the pathway to Hugo Gwilym’s front door, trying to remember all the things Ben had told her she should be. Strong. No bullshit. In charge. She kept trying, saying those words over and over in her head like a mantra, but other thoughts kept creeping in, getting in the way.
The way Ben had behaved in front of Marina. The way he had made her behave. She had felt useless when Marina left, pathetic and weak. She had also felt like she had done the wrong thing. Or been persuaded to do the wrong thing. And she disliked herself because of it.
But Ben had talked her round. ‘Don’t listen to her,’ he had said. ‘We don’t need her. I’ve got it all sorted out. It’ll be fine.’ He had taken her face in his hands then, turned it up so she had no choice but to look at him. It was the first time she’d realised just how strong his grip was. He had smiled. ‘You just do as I say, and everything will work out for the best. OK?’
And Maddy had nodded and agreed.
But now she felt anything but OK. Doubts were hammering at the certainty Ben had tried to instil in her. She thought she should listen to them. Even act on them, maybe. But as she approached Gwilym’s front door and felt her hand go towards the bell, she realised she wasn’t going to. It was easier to do what Ben wanted. Less trouble. Safer. For her.
She kept her hand on the bell. He could ignore it at first, but if she was insistent, he would have to come down and see who was there. He did so. Opened the door wearing his dressing gown and an angry expression. Which changed to shock and bewilderment when he saw who it was.
‘Maddy? What are —’
She didn’t give him time to finish, just swept past him, down the hall and into the living room.
‘Maddy, you can’t just…’ He followed her in.
She stood in the centre of the room, turned to him. ‘I need to talk to you, Hugo. Urgently. Now.’
He looked round. His hair was unkempt, his stubble a little more than designer, coming in very grey. His eyes dark-rimmed, sunken. He looks old, she thought. What did I see in such an old man?
‘Maddy, it’s… it’s not convenient right now. Come back… Look, why don’t we —’
‘Not convenient?’ she said, finding the strength to go with her words. ‘You mean you’ve got someone here, is that it? Didn’t take you long.’
He began to make a half-hearted protest but soon stopped.
‘Now, Hugo. It has to be right now. Say no and you’ll be sorry. Very sorry.’
He saw something in her eyes, her manner, and knew he would have to do what she said. ‘Give me… give me a minute.’
He left the room, going back upstairs. Maddy went into the hall, unlocked the front door, left it on the latch, went back into the living room where she had been standing. She heard voices from upstairs, a woman’s raised, his placating. Soon, a young woman came hurrying down the stairs, still fastening her clothes. She looked into the living room, saw Maddy. Wasn’t happy.
‘You’re well out of it,’ said Maddy.
The young woman grabbed her coat and left, slamming the door behind her.
Gwilym re-entered the room. ‘This better be good.’
‘Oh it is, Hugo.’ She knew what she had to say next. Ben had rehearsed her. ‘I’m going to go to the police, Hugo.’
‘The police? Why?’
‘Tell them you raped me.’
‘Oh Maddy, that’s just rubbish. There’s no need to do that.’
‘Yes there is, Hugo.’
‘Look…’ He crossed towards her, smile in place, arms outstretched. ‘Let’s talk about this. It ended badly, I know, but —’
‘I’ve got proof,’ she said, cutting him off.
His mood changed suddenly. ‘Proof? What kind of proof?’
She smiled. She enjoyed seeing his reaction. Enjoyed having the upper hand with him for once. ‘Proof that you were the father of our child.’
‘You can’t prove that. It’s… it’s gone.’
She remembered the lines she had rehearsed. ‘It’s not, Hugo. I couldn’t go through with it.’
Gwilym’s face had drained of colour. He looked like he had aged ten years in as many seconds. ‘What d’you mean?’
‘I kept it, Hugo.’
‘You’re… you’re lying.’
‘No I’m not.’ She rubbed her stomach, advanced towards him. ‘Here it is, Hugo, here’s your child… Want to feel?’
He backed away from her, letting out a moan that sounded like the final breath of a wounded animal.
‘A simple DNA test,’ she said, still advancing. ‘That’s all it’ll take. I’ll show them the marks on my wrist. I’ll tell them that you raped me.’
Gwilym looked round frantically, like he was trapped.
‘And I wasn’t the first, was I, Hugo? You like to do this. Take a young woman, seduce her to get her pregnant, or worse…’ Maddy kept advancing. She could feel anger rising within her. Rage at what he had done to her, at how she had been so stupid as to let him. She wanted to lash out, hit him. Hurt him.
‘What… what are you going to do?’ he said. ‘What d’you want from me?’ His voice small and pathetic. Defeated. ‘What d’you want me to do?’
‘Hand over all your research about deviant personalities for that book you’ve been working on,’ said a male voice.