So you’re still here?
Great! Then I know you want to write.
Fabulous. Strap yourself in.
You’re in the right place. I have the magic pill.
Seriously, I do. Are you ready?
Open wide.
Close your eyes.
The magic pill is … drum roll … that there is no magic pill. Thank you and goodnight!
Yeah, sorry. There’s no magic pill.
Wait! Don’t go back to Facebook/eBay/Twitter/Instagram just yet. Let me explain …
There are three things that all – and I mean all – writers have to overcome. Just. Three. Things. But they have to overcome them every time they write. Beginners think ‘when I beat these three things, I’ll write my memoir/screenplay/manual/sitcom/children’s book/award-winning novel’. Nope. The bad news is you will have to wrestle with these three things every time you write – again and again and again.
So what do you do? How do you equip yourself to tackle them? Well, if you go to the snow in shorts and a T-shirt, you’ll be freezing, uncomfortable and unhappy. There is no such thing as bad weather: just the wrong clothes. Similarly, you need the right equipment to prepare yourself for writing.
Good news! They say madness is doing the same thing and expecting different results. But you are here. Reading this book. That means you are doing something different. The best indication of future behaviour is past behaviour, and my bet is that in the past when you’ve been stuck, you’ve given something different a go and it has helped you get out of your rut. The fact you are here, reading this, means you can look forward to inspiration, productivity and the reward of some well-deserved time on Satisfaction Island soon.
The key to facing these three things and writing anyway is to know they are completely normal. Expect them! They are as predictable as flies at a picnic. Know that, and you won’t run around screaming, ‘What are these small black flying creatures? They must be here to eat us alive. Let’s run!’ You’ll know, even before you pack the baguette, cheese and wine, to expect flies. In the rest of this book I’ll teach you how to expect and accept them, and give you tools to deal with each of them, so you don’t freak the fuck out and immobilise in terror.
So what are these three things that all writers wrestle with over and over again?
1.Procrastination.
2.Thinking your work is crap.
3.Worrying about what other people will think.
Sound familiar? Good! That means you’re a normal writer. Read on …