NEW YEAR, NEW YOU
Emma Rose eyed the mess on the living room floor. Christmas gifts had long been tucked away in bedrooms or the kitchen or wherever her mother could find an extra inch of space in their cramped three-bedroom apartment, but what was left was the real treasure. Ribbon—tons of it. Red satin, green glitter, and gold organza were always nice. But there was also a shimmery silver, pearly white cord, and velvet in deep purple.
“Seriously, Em, you totally don’t get the gift thing,” her brother William had complained on Christmas morning. “You take forever to open a present.”
The whole family had watched as Emma carefully lifted each piece of clear tape with her fingernail so as not to rip the wrapping. Ribbon was slowly unknotted and peeled away. Her parents sat back, savoring big mugs of coffee. Unlike her younger brother, they understood Emma’s quirks when it came to crafts and fashion.
“I’m going to make such fabulous things!” Emma had exclaimed. For her, the real gift was the wrapping. She loved Aunt Melissa’s presents most of all, with their whirlwind of ribbon, sparkle, and even sprigs of holly. It would all find its way into craft projects—woven ribbon headbands and notebook covers, ribbon-trimmed lampshades and purses, whimsically adorned jars for her sketching pencils….
Now, a week later, Emma reached for the lengths of turquoise grosgrain and iridescent ivory ribbon. The colors were reminiscent of magical oceans far away from the steel-gray clouds that blanketed the city outside her windows. Over, under, in, out, she chanted under her breath, as the woven square bloomed under her fingers. She imagined a mermaid with a shimmery tail sitting on a rock. She wore a bikini top made from the woven ribbon. The colors flowed from light to dark and, maybe, back again. Her fingertips brushed the braided patch, admiring its weight and sturdiness.
I could extend the top and make a cute mini dress, she thought.
The ribbon had just enough stretch to settle over the curve of hips. No longer a mermaid—a dress for a girl in a music video. If she added silver and gold ribbon, the dress would catch the light as the beautiful girl danced.
Emma reached for her sketchbook lying among the ribbon on the hardwood floor. She was never without one of the silk brocade-covered books filled with thick, creamy white paper. She never knew when an idea would hit. The idea didn’t have to be great to add to the book. One idea led to another. Bits of one design found their way into another design.
Emma had filled dozens of these sketchbooks with her designs over the last few years alone. Sundresses, skirts, capri pants, ball gowns, swim suits, even space suits.
Her pencil moved in a quick, confident motion. She shaded in the crosshatch marks to show the texture of the ribbon. The doorbell rang and her hand jerked, leaving an ugly mark across the page. She frowned, reaching for her eraser. The doorbell rang again. It took a minute to remember that she was the only one home. Her parents had left for dinner with the Duncans, who lived two floors up. Will was sleeping over at his friend Sean’s apartment.
She padded through their narrow front hall in her fuzzy purple socks. On tiptoes, she peered through the door’s peephole.
Oh, no! What time was it? How had she forgotten?
Glancing down at her stretchy yoga pants and zip-up hoodie, Emma debated if she could bolt to her bedroom and change really fast.
“I know you’re there, Emma,” Charlie Calhoun’s raspy voice rang out. He leaned on the doorbell. She had no choice. She opened the door.
“Seriously, Em?” Holly Richardson placed her hands on her hips. Emma admired the short, simple pale-pink shift dress her friend wore. Holly had paired it with black textured tights and black suede flats, and her long legs seemed to stretch on forever.
“I know, I know,” Emma began. “It’s just that I started making this fabric out of the holiday ribbons and it was coming out so cool that I—”
“Floated off into a fashion fog and forgot about your best friends and the big party,” Charlie finished knowingly.
“Something like that,” Emma admitted. Fashion always had a way of nudging everything else aside. “Your glasses say it all, don’t they?” Charlie wore crazy lime-green glasses with HAPPY NEW YEAR scrawled across the top of them.
“I like my holidays. No point going to a party if you’re not going to do it big.”
That was Charlie—all or nothing. Never wishy-washy. He even had noisemakers poking out of the pockets of the worn denim shirt he wore over narrow whale-gray cords.
“You, however, need to show a little New Year’s spirit.” Charlie pushed his hand through his spiky blond hair. “That outfit’s lame, especially for you.” Charlie was also brutally honest.
“You should go without me. I’m kind of into this fabric thing and—”
“You’re scared to go,” Holly finished, pushing past Emma and into the apartment. Charlie followed and shut the door firmly behind them.
“I’m not scared of the Ivana-Bees or their party,” Emma said. “It’s a bunch of snobby airhead girls and dumb boys prancing around all night. Why bother?”
“Em, come on. You promised you’d try. For me.” Holly widened her water-blue eyes hopefully at Emma.
“Ivana and her friends don’t want me there,” Emma added. Back when middle school first started, they’d named Ivana Abbott’s followers the Bees—as in “I Wanna Be Ivana.” Holly had always made fun of them with Emma, but this year Holly had been dangerously close to joining the hive.
“I want you there,” Holly insisted. She wasn’t letting Emma back out this time. “And it’s New Year’s!”
“Word is Kayla Levine’s apartment is insane. That interior designer, you know the one with the TV show, Ricardo what’s-his-name, did it. The whole place is red and white. We’ve got to see that.” Charlie wiggled his eyebrows. Emma loved anything to do with design. Sofa fabric was just a notch down from dress fabric.
Emma twirled a strand of her shoulder-length pale brown hair around her finger. Holly kept saying that there was another side to Ivana. Some secret sweet side that she kept hidden. Way hidden. Emma sighed. She’d promised Holly she would give Ivana a chance. New Years was meant for throwing out the old and bringing in the new.
“Okay.” She raised her arms in surrender. “I’m going, but not for Ivana or Kayla. Best friends need to ring in the new year together.”
Holly squeezed her in a hug. She smelled of vanilla and figs.
“Get dressed!” Charlie ordered.
Emma hurried to her bedroom and surveyed her closet. She had no idea what to wear. A little black dress? Nice but boring. Her eyes scanned the crowded rack.
The red sequined tube dress that she’d found last summer at the vintage shop on the Lower East Side called to her. Nothing said New Years Eve like sequins. The dress was fun and, if she paired it with skinny jeans and short boots, it wouldn’t be too dressy. She shimmied into the outfit and pulled a brush through her hair. Ready to go!
Before they left, Emma texted her dad and he agreed to pick her up at Kayla’s. Ten minutes after midnight and no later, he insisted. He was usually a softie, but Emma didn’t push him tonight. That was late enough. She linked arms with Holly and Charlie and the three of them rode the elevator downstairs and shared a taxi twenty blocks uptown.
A doorman in a stiff cranberry blazer with gold braiding on the shoulders directed them to the Levines’ apartment on the 36th floor. As they waited for the elevator, Emma mentally redesigned the jacket. A softer, more-forgiving fabric was needed. Perhaps felted wool. And a cool insignia or monogram instead of the costume-like braiding, she thought.
Long before the door opened, the thump of music snaked its way into the elevator and into Emma’s designing thoughts. She held tightly to Charlie’s arm as he pushed his way through a sea of teenage bodies extending into the depths of Kayla’s apartment and into the living room.
Everything was red-and-white. Stark white walls. Maraschino-cherry modern sofas and architectural chairs. Low white-marble table. Floor-to-ceiling windows showcasing the twinkling New York City skyline. Silver Mylar balloons artfully placed in clusters about the room.
“You fit in,” Holly called over the music. She jutted her chin toward Emma’s red dress.
“Doubtful,” Emma said with a smile. “Takes more than matching the furniture.”
Emma spotted Kayla’s mom standing in a group of adults before she saw Kayla. A silver clip held back Mrs. Levine’s ebony hair and she was squeezed into a one-shouldered scarlet dress. Her crimson lips and heavily mascara-ed lashes stood in stark contrast to her pale skin. Kayla’s mom owned Beautylicious, the trendiest makeup line that select department stores were now carrying. Kayla looked like a mini version of her mom. Her mauve dress was just as tight.
“Food!” Charlie yelled over the music. He pulled Emma and Holly toward a table with bowls of chips and salsa.
Holly and Charlie were immediately drawn into other conversations. Emma scanned the room for familiar faces. She recognized tons of kids from Downtown Day. A few smiled at her. Some nodded or gave her a curious glance. She studied them as if they were strangers, not kids she saw every day in the hallways of school. Stretchy black mini skirts, dark denim skinny jeans, glittery gold halters.
She watched a group of boys from her grade throw pretzels into the air and try to catch them in their mouths. Jackson’s friends.
Jackson. Emma looked westward, out over the white holiday lights on a nearby roof garden. She tried to picture him in his ski clothes. Sleek down-filled parka, ski goggles, his wavy brown hair flecked with snow. No question he’d look good. Jackson Creedon always looked good. The question was whether he was thinking of her on his family vacation to Colorado.
Whether he thought of her at all.
If he were home, he’d be here. Jackson existed on a whole other planet apart from Emma’s. He lived in Ivana’s popular galaxy. That’s why the Ivana-Bees had a collective seizure when he’d asked her to the movies.
Emma thought back to three weeks ago. Pizza at Mario’s. They’d both ordered Veggie Supreme slices. Holly and Clayton Vanderbeek had joined them. Even though Jackson had spent most of the time talking sports stats with Clayton, he kept stealing glances at her, nudging her arm with his. She hadn’t been able to focus on the movie at all with him sitting so close and couldn’t say a word about it afterwards. Then the holidays and end-of-semester tests rolled in and they hadn’t really seen each other since.
She wished he were here.
Instead, Ivana appeared at her side. Emma tried not to stare, but where were the rest of Ivana’s clothes? Her violet dress, which perfectly highlighted her copper-red hair and creamy skin, was easily missing three inches of fabric—or a pair of pants. If she bent over, everyone was sure to see London, France, and Ivana’s underpants.
Ivana intertwined her arm with Holly’s and cooed over her pink dress. Emma pretended not to care. Holly had been her best friend since preschool days of saggy tights and mary-janes. She knew they’d always be best friends. No matter what.
And that included Ivana.
“Hey, girls!” Ivana squealed, directing her attention purely at Holly. “You won’t believe the amazing stuff Santa brought me.” She jangled the gold charm bracelet on her wrist. “Each charm represents something in my life. Look, Holls, what does this remind you of?”
Holly lifted the tiny oar charm. “The lake! That’s so funny.”
“What’s funny?” Lexie Blackburn demanded.
“Love the bracelet,” Kayla cooed, leaning in for a closer look.
Emma blinked. It was amazing. Lexie, Kayla, and Shannon O’Malley had just materialized out of nowhere to ooh and ah. Ivana’s loyal back-up chorus was right on cue.
“Last summer, Ivana and I took a rowboat out on the lake and one of the oars fell in and sunk to the bottom,” Holly explained. “We were totally across the lake from our docks, and we had to paddle back with just one oar. It was hysterical.”
Holly and Ivana’s families had both rented houses on some lake in Connecticut last summer. At the time, while she worked at her father’s lace factory during the heat wave, Emma had figured their connection was one of those isolated-in-the-woods friendships that crumble in the real world. Not so much. Theirs was still going strong. Holly had grown five inches last summer, and with her long honey-brown waves and killer smile, she’d become gorgeous. Gorgeous enough for Ivana want to claim her as one of her own.
Except Holly never will be an Ivana-Bee, Emma reminded herself. Holly still has the ability for independent thought.
Emma smiled as she checked out their outfits. All three girls also wore tight dresses the length of T-shirts. Lexie’s was black with a criss-cross back, but it was Kayla and Shannon’s mauve dresses that made Emma clench her teeth to hold back her giggles. They were exactly the same! Judging from their sideways glances and the point they made of standing on either side of Lexie, this twin-thing was not planned.
“Kayla, why’d you invite all these people?” Lexie surveyed the crowd with a sneer. “I thought you were doing a more exclusive thing.”
“Exclusive would’ve been better,” Ivana agreed.
Shannon nodded. Shannon was always nodding. As far as Emma could tell that was her role in the group. The nodder.
Kayla’s cheeks flushed to match her dress. “It’s my mom…she’s launching this new organic nail polish. Eco-licious, it’s called.” Kayla splayed her fingers, showing off her ruby-lacquered nails. “She wanted lots of people at this party. She invited some clients, too. It’s a big deal this nail polish.” She pointed to a display of polish bottles stacked artfully on a mirrored side table.
“When’s it launching?” Ivana asked, inspecting Kayla’s manicure.
“In the spring,” Kayla said, “but before it comes out in the stores, Beautylicious is featuring it at the Save the Earth charity event.”
“What’s that?” Charlie asked, obnoxiously poking his head between Holly and Ivana.
Ivana rolled her eyes. “Figures you have no idea. It’s the hottest charity event around. Save the Earth does all this great work saving, you know, the planet.”
“And nail polish is connected how?” Charlie asked.
“They have an invite-only fundraiser at the Park Avenue Armory. You must’ve heard of it. It’s called ‘Goin’ Green,’ and every year, it features the hottest up-and-coming designers in fashion and innovators in beauty and fashion,” Kayla explained. “My mom was asked which is, like, the hugest honor.”
Shannon nodded enthusiastically.
“My mother always goes,” Holly added. Mrs. Richardson was a well-connected real estate agent and a huge donor to the fancy charities.
Emma wondered what new designers would be there. It would be amazing if Allegra Biscotti were ever invited. Next year, she thought. Hopefully next year.
“I still say the five of us are so much cooler than everyone else here.” Lexie flipped her long dark hair to make her point and to move the focus away from Kayla. Ivana and Lexie hated to be out of the spotlight.
“Agreed,” Ivana said. “But that’s why they’re all here. To see us.”
Shannon nodded.
Emma caught Charlie’s eye. Seriously? How could they be so rude or so clueless or both? She knew it must have taken Holly a lot to score her and Charlie an invite, but still. Didn’t these girls see that they were standing right there?
“I’m getting a soda,” Emma announced. She needed some breathing room. She headed toward a table of drinks set up in the far corner of the room. Charlie followed.
As a waiter dressed in a black collarless shirt poured her soda, Emma watched the other girls in her grade circle Ivana’s group, eager to be included in the conversation. Eager to breathe in her self-important air.
“Ivana is all-powerful,” Charlie noted.
“Gross,” Emma muttered. “Those girls are like minnows trying to play with sharks.”
“Actually it’s fascinating.” Charlie leaned against the back of a sofa and watched Ivana gesture wildly with her willowy arms. “She’s like some mythic evil goddess. She has what everyone wants. She wears the crown of popularity.”
“It’s not a pretty crown,” Emma joked.
“You could design a crown for her. A whole outfit even.”
“A crown made of thorns and a long black dress made of the itchiest wool ever!”
“And would that be part of the new Allegra Biscotti collection?” Charlie teased.
“Never. Allegra only designs beautiful, happy clothes for beautiful, happy people. The Ivana-evil-goddess dress is all Emma Rose.” Holly left the Ivana cluster and joined them as they wandered from room-to-room. Emma thought Kayla and her mother’s style was a bit harsh, but she had to give the decorator credit. She loved the combination of bold, graphic fabrics with the simplicity of the furniture.
They stopped in a small room off the back hall. A shiny white desk took up most of the space. A huge silver-framed bulletin board with oversized photos of the Beautylicious products covered one wall. This must be Kayla’s mom’s office, Emma thought.
“Let’s hang here,” Charlie said, pulling them all onto a squishy, striped sofa in the corner. He gazed at his cell phone’s screen. “Five more minutes til midnight.”
“We should make New Year’s resolutions,” Holly said, kicking off her shoes.
“That’s lame,” Charlie clicked the stopwatch icon on his phone to start a countdown.
“No, it’s not. It’s important. If you say it out loud, visualize your dreams, they’ll come true,” Holly insisted. Emma loved that Holly was so spiritual. She believed in karma and fate and love-at-first sight. Emma was much more practical.
“This year I want to put myself out there,” Holly said. “I want to raise my hand more in class, join more clubs, maybe even try out for the play or do some performance thing.”
“Really?” Emma was impressed. Back in first grade, Holly had been so shy. She’d refused to speak to any adults, including their teacher. Obviously she wasn’t like that anymore, but this resolution was a big change. “That’s so great. You’d be killer on a stage, Holls. What about you, Charlie?”
“I want to be part of something bigger.”
“Bigger than what?”
“Bigger than Downtown Day. Bigger than school and homework.” Charlie leaned forward. “I want to do something that means something, you know?”
Emma nodded. She did. “Totally.”
“And you, Ems?” Holly asked.
“Allegra Biscotti.”
“Charlie smirked. “Of course. But what?”
“This year has been crazy. I mean, six months ago I was just this middle school girl sewing dresses in the corner of my dad’s lace factory. And now…” Emma thought about having her designs featured in Madison magazine, about making a dress for the most-talked about Sweet Sixteen that was photographed for The New York Times Style section, about setting up her own design studio, about her successful pop-up shop in SoHo. “Well, now I’m also Allegra Biscotti.”
“The sleek and sophisticated Italian fashion designer,” Charlie finished. He’d been in on it since the beginning.
“That’s me.” Saying it still felt unreal to Emma. The kids at Downtown Day saw her every day, yet she was so far below the Ivana-popularity meter that they barely knew she was there. As Allegra Biscotti, the fashion world and press had taken notice, yet none of them had ever seen her in the flesh. Allegra Biscotti was everywhere and nowhere.
Allegra Biscotti was an imaginary name that Emma had impulsively made up to hide that she was really just a kid. Was she Emma Rose or Allegra Biscotti? Could she be both and still keep her secret? Some days it was hard to know.
“So what’s your resolution?” Holly asked.
“Someday I want Allegra to be part of events like that Goin’ Green benefit. I want people to be inspired by my fashion.” Emma bit her lip. “Is that too much?”
“Never,” Charlie insisted. “Got to dream big, right?”
“Right.” Emma grinned. She glanced over at Charlie’s phone. “One minute left.”
“We need to make a toast at midnight.” Holly gazed helplessly around Ms. Levine’s office. “But with what?”
Emma’s eye landed on the latest issue of Madison on the desk. She picked up the famous fashion bible. Her thumb rubbed the glossy cover. She so wanted more photos of her designs, her ideas, her fashions in this magazine. She so wanted to be a bigger part of the fashion world. “Let’s toast on Madison.” It seemed fitting since Allegra had started with Madison. She held the magazine out. Charlie and Holly each grabbed onto a side.
They raised their arms and tossed the magazine in the air, as the clock hit midnight.
“To dreams,” Holly said.
“To a mind-blowing new year,” Charlie said.
“To something bigger,” Emma said. “Together!”