Horror and disgust ate through my throat. It joined the bile in my belly from last night’s imbibing. My brain seemed to struggle to make sense of what my eyes were seeing.
Jars the size of my palm were lined up on shelves. Tubs the size of my shell at home lined the walls in stacks that rose to the ceiling. In one far corner, there was a cage bigger than the totality of my dwelling. It looked like they were filled with some kind of bluish fluid. But more solid than liquid. Was there a state between fully solid and fully liquid?
With a hand over my mouth, I tried to see what was in each one. Each one housed…something. I could discern fins and tails. Some feet. Hands and faces. But none of the recognizable parts were in the correct spot.
THUD.
I jolted, mixing the morass in my belly once more. Something in the huge cage in the far corner smashed against its barrier. It shook the entire floor. The substances in the other smaller jars and tubs trembled and rippled with the blow.
Kenton pushed past me. He grabbed something up from the lone piece of furniture sitting in the middle of the room. Lifting his arm, he pointed it at the cage.
Harsh screams pierced my mind. I fought to show no reaction to that piercing keening. It felt like my brain was going to liquify; the sound was so high pitched.
I bit the inside of my cheek hard enough to taste blood. Combining both pains into one, I shoved them deep inside myself. So deep they couldn’t hurt me anymore.
But something within me caught the melody of pain and tried to rise to meet it. As if that innermost part of myself wanted to add a haunting harmony and give voice to that anguish.
The notes collided in the back of my throat. I could feel their power. The push and press of the song made me feel too full.
But I couldn’t let it loose. Not with Kenton in the same room. Instinctually, I knew that I could never let him know about it. He would cage me just like he had these other poor souls.
“Don’t let him scare you, Seren. He’s just letting you know he’s here, and that he likes you,” Kenton said. He turned back to me, a bright smile on his face. “Remind me to introduce you to him later. He’s been lonely for so long.”
Another wail sliced through my mind at Kenton’s words. Whatever that creature was, he wasn’t there by choice. And he wanted out.
“I’ll make a note of it, sir.” I folded my hands together, forced myself to stand tall and meet the monster’s gaze who stood before me. I even managed a slight smile.
Kenton nodded. “I’d invite you to sit, but—” he waved his hand around the small office that lacked any seating surfaces.
I certainly wasn’t going to put myself at a disadvantage and sit on the male’s floor. I smiled again, shrugged his comment away. “That’s okay, sir. What can I help you with?”
He edged his hip onto the desk. “It seems I didn’t make myself clear enough the last time we spoke, Seren.” He went silent and just stared at me.
I kept my mouth shut and my mind quiet.
He sighed. Pulled something up from his desk. He raised it but didn’t read from the small notiz. “An unidentified source in the Navy says that the accident last week was caused by attackers. This same source calls on the people of Aiseiri to demand answers from His Majesty’s Navy. Are we in danger from some unknown enemy? Are the king and inner ring keeping information from his people?”
Masu. I swallowed. The noise was so loud, it sounded like my throat was vying for supremacy over the creature in the cage when he thumped against his barrier.
“You mentioned in our discussion yesterday that you knew nothing of the attackers. Are you changing your story finally?” He raised a single ebony brow.
I shook my head. “I have not, sir.”
The muscles in his jaw vibrated slightly. “Then it seems you’re trying to expose some kind of truth, as you see it. You did leave these messages with the all the NOs, yes?”
He already said he had me followed. Why was he now asking the same question? Should I lie or should I tell him the truth?
The truth couldn’t hurt me. Not any longer. I nodded. “Yes. The people have a right to know if we are facing some kind of enemy. We all use the sluices. What if what happened once, happens again?”
His lips twitched. “By your own words, there were no attackers. Are you saying that is false?”
“Correct.” Right? I was getting confused and my brain was starting to pound in earnest.
“Then you are spreading misinformation. On purpose. What gives you the right to terrorize the people of Aiseiri?”
“No! I said there were no attackers,” I began.
“Then why are you telling the NOs that there were attackers? Do you even have your own story straight?” He pushed out a heavy sigh. “You recently lost your mother.”
That came out of nowhere. But it didn’t stop a low sound from vibrating through my chest. “You did that. Your messenger told me that you were unhappy with me.”
His eyes widened. “This unknown person told you I was unhappy.”
I nodded. “They said you were unhappy and then my mother dropped to the ground, dead.”
He winced, sorrow etching his features. “My dear girl, I would never hurt a member of Aiseiri, and certainly not because I was merely unhappy. I am not a child so overcome by my emotions that I fail to act like an adult.”
I ground my teeth together. He was making me sound insane. “The male said all of that.”
“That I am so overcome with my emo—”
“NO! That you were unhappy with me and that’s why my mother was dead.”
His brows winged up. “Those were his exact words? Kenton is unhappy, and that’s the reason your mother is dead.”
I nodded. Shook my head. “No. Just that Kenton is unhappy.”
Pity filled his gaze. “When did you start drinking last night, Seren? I know that not everyone handles occupational discharge well. It’s normal that you would seek to forget the night.”
I shook my head. “Last night was the first time I’ve even touched red since joining the Navy.”
He made a soft noise in his throat. “So you’re unaccustomed to the effects. That’s understandable.”
I wanted to wrap my hands around his throat and squeeze until his eyes popped out of their sockets. “Yes, I was inebriated. No, I didn’t start drinking until after I went to all the Notification Offices. Which was after that monster dropped my mom at my feet, saying you killed her.”
He shook his head. “No, Seren. You’re misremembering. You left Captain Winona’s office. You were heard saying you were going to go straight to the pub, drink some red, find a male to share the night with, and then go home. It seems you did this.”
I nodded. “Yes. After I went to the NOs.”
His smile was gentle, sympathetic even. “Then when would you have had time to find your mother at your feet?” He tapped out a rhythm on his desk.
Everything was getting twisted up in my head. He was doing this on purpose. Making me sound insane. “I left Captain Winona’s office. From there, I went directly to the NOs. After stopping at each NO, I went home. My mother was missing. After speaking to one of the residents on our ring, I made my way back to our dwelling. The male was standing there. He said, ‘Kenton is unhappy.’ He then dropped something. It was my mother.”
Kenton raised a hand as if to stop the torrent of my words as a section of the wall near the big cage slid back. “You were seen dropping something into the Deep.”
My stomach dropped as horror blossomed inside me. I nodded. “My mother. She was dead. Gone. I Sent her to the ocean on the other side.”
Kenton’s smile was sad. “All by yourself? Did she not have any friends who might have wanted to Send her as well?”
I shook my head. “I did it on my own. No one else loved her like I did.” Grief overflowed inside me once more. She was gone. Just like the magical sun disappeared every night. But my mother would never rise again. There was no magic strong enough for that.
Grief and whatever remained of my stomach lining tumbled together into a mix that made my brain feel sloshy. Curse those bottles of red algae. I vowed never to touch the stuff again.
A male walked through the hidden door. A large roll of too familiar fabric was draped over his arms. “Sir.”
Kenton nodded without turning around. “It seems you have a problem with thinking you are the only one capable of doing certain things, Seren. Going to the Incident site. Sending your mother because no one could do it like you could. What other things have you done that only you could perform?”
I barely heard him. My gaze and attention were focused on the unknown male with the familiar fabric in his arms. He stood there silently. Had I not seen the lump in his arms with my own two eyes, I would have assumed he was empty handed.
But he wasn’t. Not even close.
“What is that?” My voice quivered.
“Did you think to check your mother’s body for signs of life?” Kenton asked. A bite in his tone lashed me like a chain of rusty links.
“Of course, I did. I’m not a healer, but I know if a mer is dead or alive.” I concentrated so hard, it felt like I tried to pierce the shroud with my gaze alone. Did I know that bend? Did I recognize that lump?
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Kenton give some kind of signal.
The male settled the veiled mass on the table. He started unwrapping the layers of fabric I could have identified in my sleep. Section by section, a body was uncovered.
The pearlescent sheen to the skin was my undoing. “Momma.” I rushed forward. Clawed at the pieces of fabric that hadn’t been removed yet. I pushed and pulled until she was fully revealed.
Her emerald eyes opened. The graduated fuchsia colors of her hair were dull, but they were hers. The soft smile I remembered pulled at her delicate face. “Seren sweets.” She tried to lift her hand, but it fell back to her side too soon.
“Momma.” I buried my face into the nook between her neck and shoulder. “Momma.”
“So touching. A mother-daughter reunion.” Something in Kenton’s voice felt like a harpoon through my belly.
I lifted my head, shot death glares at him. “You’re a monster.”
He laughed. He laughed so hard his head tipped back as he clutched his belly. It was like dull hooks catching at my scales. They dug in, but never in clean slices. No, instead they left jagged tears and gaping holes.
I tried to push Kenton from my awareness. Shifting my gaze, I saw the other male. He stood beside his boss silently. His hands were folded, his weight comfortably balanced. Outside of a quick shift of his eyes, he was a statue.
“Look at your precious mother, Seren. Really see her,” Kenton demanded after his hilarity ran its course.
I looked back down, not because he told me to, but because I wanted just a few more seconds with her. We had so much to share, so many things to say to each other. Poseidon had answered my prayers. For the first time in my life, one of the Forgotten Gods heard me.
When I looked at her again, traced the lines of her face with my gaze, I didn’t see my beloved mother alive and frail. Gone was the familiar sheen of skin. Now it was a blue-tinged pallor that marbled her skin. Her face was calm. A calm only death can bring.
I jolted. “Momma?” I shook her. Patted her face. “Momma!”
“Why are you holding your dead mother, Seren? Did you fetch her from the solitary Sending? Are you keeping her as some kind of memento?” Kenton asked, his voice a sly whisper in my ear.
I shook my head, tears gathered in my eyes. Clutching the body to my chest, I spat at him, “You brought her here. You did this.” I laid her gently on the desk. Backed away. “You brought her back.”
Kenton laughed. “How could I do that, dear child? Am I Poseidon himself to bring back from the depths those I choose?” He snorted. “Of course, I can’t do that.”
Stabbing a hand in the direction of my mother’s corpse, I yelled at him. “You did this! You brought her back from the dead. She talked to me. She was alive.”
Kenton shook his head. “No, Seren. I didn’t. That isn’t even your mother. Where did you get the idea that it was?” His head tipped to the side, confusion on his handsome face. “That’s one of the fallen during the incident you are trying to speak this supposed truth about.”
Once again, I looked at the corpse. Saw now that it truly wasn’t my mother. How could that be? She talked to me. Called me by my nickname. The one only she used. It had been nothing but a cruel joke. He deployed some kind of mental sorcery that fooled my brain and destroyed my heart
Horror shoved at the back of my throat, weighted my limbs. I backed up, shaking my head. “No. You did this. You’re trying to confuse me. Trying to make me seem crazy.”
Kenton smiled again. “Dear child, perhaps you are truly crazy. You killed your mother in a fit of rage.”
I shook my head. “I would never have hurt her. Never.” I clutched at my chest. The very idea that I would touch her in anger or pain was a bolt to the heart. She was my everything.
Kenton nodded sadly. “Yes, Seren. You did. There are reports of you yelling at her on your ring last night. You shouted for almost half a cycle. Your neighbors reported it.”
Hazy visions of last night rose in my mind. I’d been yelling for help. Not at my mother. But no one came. No one had been there to help me. I nodded. “Yes. I yelled. But not at her.”
Kenton gave a soft sigh. “Do we take your word for it? The testimony of a hurting and broken female who, by her own words, said she went to the pubs last night? What if your timeline is wrong? What if you started drinking red before you went home?”
Was I wrong? Had I hurt her? I shook my head. “Even out of my head with pain, I never would have hurt her.” I shook my head again. Everything was blurring together. The algae, the grief, the confusion.
“You woke up in an unfamiliar dwelling today, Seren. Is it possible you asked someone to hurt your mother?”
I reared back, hit my head on the wall. “Why the hades would I do that?”
Kenton shrugged. “I have no idea what goes on in that mind of yours, child. You seem confused by a number of recent events. You didn’t even remember killing that poor captain from earlier today. How did that happen?”
My brain stuttered as I tried to switch gears with him. One gruesome picture rose quickly in my hurting mind. “That puddle of…goo wasn’t a mer. I don’t know what happened to Captain Turpin, but I had nothing to do with it.” Lifting a hand, I rubbed at my temple. Had I?
“A couple pub patrons saw you walk out with him. His neighbors said you never left his dwelling and that no other mers arrived. It would seem that you were the only one with him. If he was alone with you, how do you explain that?”
His words tangled the pictures in my head. As if he set them on their sides and spun them around. Nothing made sense. Up was down. Left was right. Black was white. Nothing made sense.
I shook my head. “No. I couldn’t have done that. I wouldn’t have done that.”
“But you did, Seren.”
I looked up. Saw the other male looking at me intently. An odd emotion sat in the depths of his eyes. “I was there. You invited me to join you and Turpin.”
Embarrassment tinged my cheeks. I slashed a hand through the air. “No.” But images floated in my mind’s eye. Two men touched me. Ran their greedy hands over my flesh. Ripples and waves of pure pleasure washed through me.
“Yes. You liked it. Liked both of us with you at the same time.” His voice dropped to a lower register. It danced along my skin like the soft brush of a passing current.
No. I shook my head. Tried to clear my mind of the images. “That didn’t happen. I left Captain Winona’s office. I went to the Notification Offices.” Maybe if I repeated everything enough, I would plaster it into my brain. “I went home. Couldn’t find my mother.”
“No, Seren. You left Captain Winona’s office, went to the NOs, went to the pubs. You didn’t go home directly after that,” Kenton said.
“Then when did I find my mother dead?” I demanded.
“How should I know? I have my own life to live,” Kenton sighed. “I knew you were trouble. Knew you couldn’t be trusted. It’s a good thing the Tribunal kicked you out when they did. You could have seriously injured another Naval officer. Or a resident. Your kind shouldn’t be allowed to mingle with the rest of us. I’m just glad we learned of your instability now.”
He straightened. Dusted his hands. “Now, I’m going to give a report to His Majesty. I will include all of what has transpired here today. Consider yourself lucky that we stopped you from further endangering anyone around you.”
“What about Captain Turpin?” the other male asked. “He was a good male. A good captain. Does he get a proper Sending? Or do we sweep this under the rug to protect this crazy one?”
“Of course he will get a proper Sending. We’ll make sure that the blame rests at the proper feet.”
Both men turned to me. Sneers and disgust written clearly on their faces. They truly believed what they were saying.
I shook my head. Despair made an uncomfortable bed partner with the remains of red algae and grief. “I didn’t do anything wrong,” I whispered.
They shook their heads at me. “I guess we’ll never know the truth, will we?” Kenton asked. “You’re dismissed.”
He tapped out another rhythm on his desk. “Leave. Go home. And for the love of the gods, get some help.”
I rushed from the room. Smashing into the opposite wall, tears broke through my control. Blind, nauseous, and confused, I ran.