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July 1993
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IT WAS LATE afternoon when I got home, stripped off my damp clothes, and took a hot shower. I longed for a nap, but there was a print job to complete and a deadline to meet so I got dressed and went back to work. Tom must have heard the exhaustion in my voice when I called to tell him I was too tired to cook. He brought in carry-out from Lichee Garden, cleared up, and washed the dishes while I sat in a dumb funk staring at a small stain on the wallpaper.
“You need to get some sleep.” Tom rubbed my shoulders as I sipped a cup of jasmine tea. “I think the thing with Arcas has you completely rattled. He’s a liar and a coward, but so what? We’ve had twenty-one good years together. Frankly, I’m grateful he disappeared and left you here with me.” He kissed the top of my head and I leaned back into his warm hands.
My husband was right. I wasn’t cut out to be a Greek shepherdess. I had the life I wanted, but my memory of a great romance with a star-crossed lover was now ashes. Arcas had come back from the dead destroying my fantasies and injuring my self-esteem in the process.
I closed my eyes and let Tom knead the aches and tension from my neck. I tried to relax. but there were too many unanswered questions playing through my head. “It isn’t just Arcas, it’s that woman on the boat. Doesn’t that story give you the creeps?”
“Coincidences happen, although this one does seem improbable. Are you sure he had the inscription, right? Maybe he just said some mumbo-jumbo and you heard what you wanted to hear.”
“No, there was a nurse there and she heard the same thing and . . .” I turned around to look Tom in the face. “He said she looked just like me, only younger. I can’t get that out of my head.”
Tom shrugged. “There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio.”
“Seriously, it doesn’t freak you out?”
“A little, but weird things happen. We can’t know everything. How’s this for a guess? The necklace lay at the bottom of the lake for many years until a big carp came along and, mistaking it for a worm, devoured it whole. Then, one day the carp is caught by a kid fishing off Queens Quay pier. He brings it home, slices it open and, voila, your sister’s necklace. The little boy gives it to his incredibly beautiful mother who has dark, curly hair just like yours. She wears it when they go out on a harbor cruise the following week and meet a nice old professor. What do you think? Would that do it?”
I laughed. “Not bad, not likely, but not bad.” I finished my tea and stood up. “I’m turning in. I’m short of sleep and the last twenty-four hours have exhausted me.” I started upstairs then turned back. “Don’t tell Cady about Arcas. Let her be the daughter of a hero a while longer.”
I hoped that when I woke the next morning the sun would bring clarity and light to the dark muddle inside my head, but it didn’t. Arcas was still not dead, and some unknown woman named Joanie was still wearing my sister’s necklace. I decided to call my mother.
She answered on the first ring. “What happened? Is Nick alright?” She’d become an alarmist since Joanie’s death, always expecting bad news. On the other hand, she didn’t panic in water deeper than a bathtub, while I still suffered from debilitating aquaphobia. It was a family joke that we’d rented a cottage at the lake every August since Cady was ten, but I’d never gotten my feet wet.
“Everyone’s fine, Mom, relax, I just wanted to ask you something. Do you have a minute?”
“Of course, I’m all ears.” The tension disappeared from her voice as she settled down for a chat.
“You know those cat pendants you gave me and Joanie? I always thought they were one-of-a-kind, but could there have been others?”
“That’s an odd question.” My mother paused for several moments. “The cat medallion was something the jeweler had in stock, but the engraving was custom, and he cut it in half specifically for us. Why are you asking about that now after all these years?”
“I met a professor at the hospital when I was visiting Nick, and he claims he met a girl on a harbor cruise who was wearing a medallion just like Joanie’s.”
“Well, she might have been wearing the same cat pendant, like I said, it was a regular stock item.”
“It was more than that. It had been cut in half and had the same inscription. Are you sure there weren’t more made? I’ve had the willies ever since I heard that story.”
“The same inscription?” I could almost see my mother’s jaw drop.
“He knew exactly what it said, even the words that had been cut in half.”
“That’s not possible. You’re giving me goose bumps.”
“There’s more. He said she looked like me and they called her Joanie.”
My mother gasped.
“It isn’t our Joanie, obviously. It can’t be. It’s someone Cady’s age, but it’s so strange.”
“It certainly is, my hands are shaking.”
“I didn’t mean to upset you, but I had to know if there were other pendants like the ones you gave us.”
“There aren’t, at least not as far as I know.”
I didn’t know what to say and let the silence go on for too long.
“Was Joanie wearing it that day, the day she died?” she asked in a very soft voice.
I nodded as though she could see me. My throat was dry, but I managed to swallow. “We never took them off, but it was a long time ago. Memory’s a funny thing so maybe I’m confused. Maybe she took it off and left it somewhere and another woman found it.”
“Maybe,” she replied. But neither of us believed it.
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BEFORE VISITING NICK that afternoon I finished a print run, threw in a load of laundry, cleaned the bathrooms, and vacuumed the living room carpet. When I began to defrost the refrigerator, I realized I was procrastinating. All I had to do was visit Nick, something I’d done every day for a week. Why did the thought of walking into the hospital make me cringe? I turned off the vacuum and sat down with the sudden realization that I was afraid. The professor had evoked Joanie’s ghost and an irrational part of my brain was terrified that I’d walk into his room and find her sitting on his bed. My rational self knew this was nonsense, but another part of me kept wondering, what if the lady from the boat shows up at St. Michael’s and what if she’s Joanie and what if she’s still angry that I let her drown? I put the vacuum away, washed my face, brushed my hair, and took two aspirin. As I got into my car and drove toward the hospital, I touched the pendant around my neck. “I’m sorry,” I whispered to the air for the gazillionth time. “Please forgive me.”
I arrived to find Nick in a good mood, in fact, he was his old self again, full of plans and limitless energy. He was excited about protesting a speech by a holocaust denier with Dr. Kanter’s grandson. His fervor reminded me of the time Arcas and Tom couldn’t talk about anything but bringing down the junta. I smiled at the memory of Arcas and his youthful passion until I remembered his lies, but there was nothing dishonest about Nick’s enthusiasm. His eyes glowed as he recounted the sins of the fascist Heritage Front and why they had to be held in check.
Once he’d finished recounting the sins of the infamous Ernst Zundel he told the story of the heroic members of the ARA who’d confronted white supremacists on Parliament Hill. His new friend had given Nick a blow-by-blow description of everything that had happened. I remembered watching the confrontation on the six o’clock news. I’d recoiled at the sight of angry men snarling and spitting through barred teeth, but Nick couldn’t wait to enlist, broken leg and all. I worried about him, but I knew Tom would be proud.
When he finished regaling me with his plans to right the world, he asked, “Mom, I never got Peter’s phone number. Would you stop by his grandfather’s room and get his number for me?”
“No,” I wanted to scream. “Absolutely not, I will never walk back into Dr. Kanter’s room.” I felt my face flush with embarrassment. I was being a coward and utterly irrational. How could I explain my anxiety without sounding completely unhinged?
I fished the little medallion from beneath my T-shirt and held it out for him to look at. “You know how I always wear this necklace in memory of my sister?”
“Sure.” He looked understandably puzzled.
“And you know how it’s inscribed with a line from a poem that Joanie and I loved when we were children.”
“Yeah, ‘Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer worked very well together.’”
“Exactly, and the words were cut in half so they don’t make sense unless you put the two pieces together.”
“So?”
“So, the professor claims he saw someone wearing Aunt Joanie’s half of the pendant on the boat where he fell. He knew exactly what it said, nonsense half-words and all. And . . .” I tucked the pendant back into my shirt. “He said she looked exactly like me, or maybe more like Cady since she was about Cady’s age, the age my sister was when she drowned.”
Nick looked at me as though he were the parent, and I was a silly child. “So now you think he saw your dead sister and you’re completely freaked out.”
I nodded. “Yep, I get the heebie-jeebies whenever I think about it. I mean, how could he know what was on her half of the pendant?”
“Mom, what did Dr. Kanter do for a living?”
“He was an archaeologist.”
“Right, and not just any archaeologist, he specialized in decoding ancient languages. That’s why he wants the disc, so he can figure out what those odd inscriptions mean. Deciphering your necklace was a piece of cake for him.”
“But he only saw half the inscription and he’d have had to know the poem.” Then I remembered, he had known the poem. He’d read it to his son when he was little. I let out a breath I hadn’t realized I was holding in. Nick’s explanation certainly made more sense than Tom’s. “You know, I bet you’re right. I hadn’t thought of that. Thank you.”
“No problem, but I can ask the nurse to get Peter’s phone number if you’re still spooked.”
“No, that’s OK, I’ll get it for you.” I opened my purse, took out my wallet, and found the photo of Joanie I kept tucked in a little plastic sleeve behind the photos of Nick and Cady. “You know, I sometimes wonder what I’d say to her if we met again. We were identical twins, but we were different in a lot of ways. You won’t believe this, but I was the wild one.”
“Oh, I believe it. You may be afraid of boats and water, but I’ve seen you on the ski slopes and you’re the only mom I know who subscribes to Mother Jones.”
He was right. He got his daredevil streak from me. “I wasn’t afraid of anything when we were kids. All I wanted was travel and adventure while Joanie dreamed of nothing but a husband and kids. It’s funny how things turned out. Sometimes it feels as though I’m living her life instead of mine.”
“Mom.” Nick’s face clouded with concern. “Aren’t you happy? Do you wish you’d had a different life?”
“Oh no, your dad and I were just saying how glad we are that things worked out the way they did, but still, I got the life that Joanie wanted. She missed so much.”
“Yeah, that’s sad,” he agreed. “It makes me realize that you shouldn’t waste your life. I’m going to make sure mine counts for something. That’s why I’m going to stand with Peter and the ARA at that Rally.”
“Go for it,” I said despite my trepidations. “Just be careful. You’ll be on crutches, so you won’t be able to run if things get nasty.”
“Don’t worry, I don’t want to die a martyr like Cady’s dad, but I don’t want to live my life on the sidelines either.”
“Right.” I pressed my lips together. I wasn’t ready to tell him the truth about Arcas. I put Joanie’s photo back in my wallet and stood up. “You know, maybe I’ll go pay a visit to our friend down the hall.”
Dr. Kanter was as white and wrinkled as his bedclothes when I peeked in on him. I might have missed him in the tangle of sheets if he hadn’t turned his head and looked at me. “Is that you, Joanie? Is it time for supper?”
“Dr. Kanter, it’s me, Amy Savas. Did I wake you?”
“What? I’m sorry. I must have drifted off. I thought I was back on the ship.”
“No, you’re in the hospital, St. Michael’s.” He looked confused as he struggled to sit up. “Would you like me to call a nurse?”
“No, that’s not necessary.” He felt around for his glasses buried in the blanket and put them on. “You’re the woman with the disc. I thought you were someone else for a moment there. Forgive me, I’m still half asleep, please, come in.”
I wasn’t convinced, but I took a few tentative steps into the room.
He kept looking at me and shaking his head. “You and your daughter look so much like Joanie it’s uncanny. It’s hard to believe you aren’t related.”
“A lot of what you’ve told me is uncanny. To be honest, your story about the woman on the ship brought back a lot of memories. You really had me going, the way you figured out what was written on the other half of the pendant. That’s quite a stunt you pulled.”
“I’m sorry? I’m not sure what you mean.”
“The way you deciphered the other half of the poem. That was really clever. You archaeologists are even smarter than I thought.”
“Oh, my dear, I wish we were that intelligent. I remembered the inscription because we spent a lot of time trying to figure it out. It was a parlor game we played to amuse ourselves, but none of us ever came up with a good solution. It really bothered Joanie, poor thing. She was sure it was a clue to her identity, but we could never solve the puzzle. Are you sure there weren’t more of those necklaces made?”
His denial had me spooked again. “I was wondering that too, so I called my mother and asked where she bought it. Apparently, the cat medallion was a stock item, but the engraving was a custom job. I suppose, if the jeweler liked it, he could have made more of them.” I was desperate for a logical explanation. “Was your Joanie from Rochester by any chance?”
“She doesn’t know where she’s from. She can’t remember a thing about her past. I was hoping that you knew her.”
My hands were trembling as I pulled Joanie’s photo from my wallet and showed it to him. “This is Joanie, my sister.”
“Yes, that’s her. She looks just like that.”
“Joanie died twenty years ago. She drowned in a boating accident.”
“No, no, she’s . . . I don’t know. I’m confused.”
I turned and looked out the window at a small silver plane passing through a cloud. “It was my fault. I was charged with driving a boat under the influence and involuntary manslaughter. That’s why I came to Canada.”
“How awful.”
“So, you can imagine how disturbing I find your story. It’s almost as though you saw Joanie’s ghost or something.”
“I can assure you that the Joanie I know is very much alive. In fact, she’s just fallen madly in love with the ship’s doctor. I expect they’ll get married soon.”
I was inexplicably pleased by this news. It’s what Joanie would have wanted. “I’m happy for her, whoever she is.”
“She’s a domestic little thing, rather old-fashioned that way. I wish I could see her again, let her know what the other half of her pendant says.”
“Yes, I wish you could tell her that, and what it meant to us, I mean to me and my sister.” I was embarrassed to ask, but I had to know. “Is she happy?”
Dr. Kanter looked at me, surprised, but nodded. “Yes, she’s very happy now that she’s found Sam. They’re in seventh heaven, but that’s the way with lovebirds, isn’t it?” As I put the photo back in my purse he asked, “Why the unexpected visit? You haven’t changed your mind about the disc, have you? You haven’t come to take it back?”
“No, you can keep it. I stopped by because Nick wanted your grandson’s phone number. It seems they’ve really hit it off.”
“How nice, hand me my notepad and a pen, they’re in the bedside table.” He jotted down the number in an old man’s jagged scrawl. “I’m relieved about the disc since I’ve already contacted my department. I haven’t heard back yet, but I’m expecting a call any time now.”
“There’s no hurry,” I assure him.
“Frankly, the person I’d really like to talk to is Charles Dawson. He teaches comparative philology at The University of London. He’d be just the man for the job, but he’s aboard that ship where I took my fall, and I don’t know how to reach him.”
“He was aboard the ship with you and Joanie?”
“Yes, we were all having supper together that last night. Everyone was happy. Joanie was absolutely glowing since she and Sam were moving in together. Dawson was toasting them with a glass of champagne. He’s a lovely fellow, brilliant mind. I don’t know why I didn’t think of him sooner.”
“I suppose a couple good minds could have the disc sorted out in no time.”
“Oh no, it takes an eternity to decipher a lost language, but the fun is in the process, and it would be a pleasure working with a man like Dawson.”
An unaccustomed sense of well-being settled over me. The room felt awash in light as I stood up. “It was wonderful talking with you. Let me know if you hear anything about the disc.” I picked up my purse and turned to go. “And I’m glad to hear that Joanie is so happy.”
On the way home, I bought a bouquet of yellow hibiscus that I arranged in a pitcher on the kitchen table. They looked like a party, a celebration of sunshine and summer. I turned on the radio and there was Whitney Houston singing, “I Will Always Love You.” I turned up the volume and was singing along at the top of my voice when Tom appeared in the doorway between the kitchen and the dining room. He must have thought I was singing for him, and maybe I was, but mostly I was singing for Joanie and the Arcas I thought I knew when we were young.
Tom took me by the hand and pulled me close. He began the slow foxtrot that was the only dance step he knew. I shut my eyes but kept on singing until the song was done and the station cut to a jingle for a local amusement park. I gave my husband an affectionate hug before breaking away to switch off the radio. “I didn’t expect you home so early. It’s not even five o’clock.”
“We had a power failure, no lights, no computers, no AC so we called it a day. I’ve been home for two hours. I didn’t know you were back until I heard you singing. That was quite a performance.”
“I don’t know why, but I feel wonderful. By the way, your son is planning to join the resistance.”
Tom raised his eyebrows.
“Dr. Kanter’s grandson convinced him to protest a speech by a holocaust denier a couple days after he’s discharged from the hospital. Apparently, he’s feeling much better.”
Tom grinned. “And you’re okay with this?”
“What can I say, it’s in his blood. There was no stopping you when you were his age.”
I stepped closer and put my left hand on his shoulder and took his right hand in mine. “Let’s dance some more. That was fun. Why don’t we ever go dancing?”
“Because we’re a couple of klutzes who trip over each other’s feet.” He held me close anyway and we swayed without music.
I lifted my face to his and he kissed me and then he kissed me again and I suspected that dinner might have to wait while we took a detour to the bedroom when I heard the doorbell ring. We exchanged quizzical looks as I pulled away to see who it could be. I opened the door to find Arcas standing on our doorstep.
He’d put on some heft over the years and his dark, curly hair was cut short and shot through with gray, but it was Arcas. He was wearing a black button-down shirt open at the collar. A bouquet of red roses bloomed optimistically from his right hand. My first impulse was to shut the door and lock it.
“Tom, come here. You’ll never guess who’s paying us a visit.”
Tom ambled up beside me then did a double take when he saw who it was. “My God.” He took a step forward to stand between me and the man at the door. “What are you doing here?”
Arcas held up the flowers. “These are for my daughter.”
Tom didn’t miss a beat. “You don’t have a daughter. There’s nothing for you here.”
“That’s not what Nancy tells me.” He sounded confident, but his shoulders drooped, and I could see he was exhausted. He looked past Tom to me. “Are you going to ask me in?”
I stepped aside to admit this ghost from my past, while Tom held his ground and didn’t move. Arcas pushed past my husband and stood awkwardly in our small living room. My heart was pounding, but I smiled cordially as though this was a normal visit. “Cady isn’t here. Do you want me to put those flowers in a vase?”
“No.” Tom was adamant. “He takes the flowers with him when he goes. He has nothing to do with Cady.”
Arcas rubbed his neck with his free hand and looked around the room. “I never imagined you and Tom together. I pictured you back in the States with your parents all these years.”
“And I pictured you dead.” I wasn’t as angry as I thought I’d be, although Tom was turning red. He looked as though he’d like to take our visitor outside and beat him to a pulp. I asked the question that had been haunting me since Nancy told us Arcas was alive.” Who the hell sent that letter telling us you’d died? Did you write that yourself?”
Arcas dropped his belligerent pose and nodded sheepishly. “My wife was pregnant, and I didn’t like to tell you that.”
“Your wife! You had a wife?”
“It was an arranged marriage, but then I came to Canada and fell in love with you, but then she got pregnant and . . .”
I was outraged. “So, the whole story about smuggling weapons and risking your life for democracy was a set-up? You planned this all out?”
“I didn’t want you to hate me. I made up a nice story so you’d always have good memories.”
“Thanks, very considerate of you.”
“I didn’t know you were pregnant too. Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I didn’t tell you because you were dead!”
“She didn’t tell you because it was none of your business.” Tom’s voice was low but I could see the muscles in his neck stiffen. “Cady’s my daughter, not yours.”
Arcas looked Tom straight in the eyes and smirked. “No, she’s mine. You may have raised her, but she’s my blood.”
Tom put his arm around my shoulder and shook his head. “That’s where you’re wrong. We’d been sleeping together for months before you disappeared. Why do you think Nancy left? She knows everything, just ask her.”
Now Arcas looked confused. He clearly didn’t know what to believe. He turned to me. “Is this true? You and Tom were sleeping together? I don’t believe it.”
Tom squeezed my shoulder and I moved closer to him. We were in this together. “Didn’t you see how Tom and I looked at one another? Didn’t you wonder about all that overtime at Abbott’s printing?” Lying was easier than I thought.
I didn’t expect him to believe a word, but to my chagrin Arcas’s face crumbled.
“Oh for God’s sake, pull yourself together,” Tom said. “You have your own children. You don’t need mine.”
“No, we never had children. My wife was pregnant when I left. That’s why I had to go back, but she lost the baby, and we couldn’t have children after that.” Arcas sat down on the sofa, threw his head back, and closed his eyes. Maybe it was grief, maybe it was just exhaustion, but he couldn’t seem to stop the flow of tears trickling down his face.
He was little more than a stranger after all these years, just a large, middle-aged Greek weeping on my couch. I didn’t need this relic from the past barging into our lives, but there he was. “Do you want a glass of water?”
“Thank you.” He dried his eyes on his shirt sleeve. “I’m sorry. This isn’t what I came for. It’s not what I expected.”
“What the hell did you expect?” Tom was furious, but I don’t know what he said next because he lapsed into rapid fire Greek while I went to get the water. Once in the kitchen, a glass of tap water seemed inadequate. I pulled a bottle of ouzo from the cupboard and put it on a tray with three glasses of ice, a pitcher of water, crackers, and a hunk of Brie. My pulse was still racing, so I made a detour to the bathroom where I peed and ran a brush through my hair before returning to the living room.
“I figured we could all use a drink.”
Arcas poured a good shot of ouzo into his glass then added a splash of water. Tom and I followed suit, raised our glasses, and mumbled a half-hearted, “Yamas.” The licorice flavored liquor gave me a jolt, but that was what I needed. Seeing Arcas again had me completely rattled.
I stared down at the man slumped on my couch. “So, bring me up to date. What have you been doing for the past twenty years?”
“He’s been making cheese,” Tom said.
“Yes, I make a lot of cheese, but that’s not all I do,” Arcas said. “I’m also a member of the Arcadian prefectural council. Papandreou recommended me for the position.”
I could see that Tom was impressed, but he didn’t want to give Arcas the satisfaction. “Really? He didn’t mention you the last time we spoke.” Tom was trying to one-up his old friend, but his boast wouldn’t have held up under scrutiny. He’d spent all of five seconds congratulating Andreas at his first post-election party a decade ago and hadn’t spoken with him since. I blushed, embarrassed for my husband. I’d never heard him brag like that before.
“So, you’re married and you make cheese,” I interrupted. “Do you still raise sheep?”
“No, we got rid of the sheep after my mother died. Kula couldn’t stand the smell of them.”
“Kula? Is that your wife?” I asked.
His face darkened. “She’s my wife for another two weeks, then she’s going to marry a naval officer like her father.”
“You married a woman whose father was a naval officer while we were trying to take down the colonels?” Tom was livid. “What sort of man are you?”
“I’m a man who loved my family, maybe too much. You wouldn’t understand, but I wouldn’t dishonor them. Our grandfathers fought together against the Turks.”
I felt bad for Arcas, even after all the pain he’d caused, but I wasn’t giving him Cady. I took another sip of ouzo and looked at him over the rim of my glass. He was practically doubled over with his head in his hands. I picked up his empty glass and refilled it with another shot. “Here, drink this.”
He shook his head and waved the drink away. “Do you have retsina?”
“No, sorry. If you’ll recall, I can’t stand the stuff.” I put the drink back down. “So, what’s your plan? How long will you be in town?” I was hoping he’d say that he was taking the next plane out, but he just studied the empty space between me and Tom without answering.
“Arcas?”
“I don’t know. I have no idea.” He looked up at me with a sad half-smile. “I thought maybe my daughter would want to live in Greece and help me run the business. It’s a big cheese factory, Arkadiko Tyri. She’d be a rich woman.”
Had Arcas really thought Cady would move to Greece to make cheese? He’d apparently been spinning happy fantasies ever since Nancy made him believe he had a daughter. “First, she’s not your daughter and second, she’s going to be a doctor.”
“That’s nice. Your daughter will be a doctor. You must feel very proud.” He stood up and bowed slightly from the waist. “I’m sorry for disturbing you. I’m sorry for everything and I’m very tired. Would you mind calling a taxi for me? I’ll wait outside.”
“No, don’t be silly. Tom will drive you to your hotel, won’t you, Tom?”
Tom gave me a dirty look, but said, “Sure.” He reached into his pocket for his car keys. “Where are you staying?”
“The Four Seasons, it’s not far away.”
“I know where it is. You must be selling a lot of cheese.” The Four Seasons was the priciest hotel in the city.
“Yes, I sell a lot of cheese. I should have brought you a wheel of Graviera. It’s our signature product.”
“You know, Tom still has family outside Athens. We go there every couple of years. Maybe we’ll call you the next time we visit.” I was trying to end this on a less tortured note.
“That would be nice. I’ll give you a tour of my factory.” He paused, looking around our house, taking in the well-worn furniture, the books, the piano, the framed photos of our kids. “I’m glad you’re happy. You deserve a good life. It was nice seeing you again.”
Tom and Arcas were halfway out the door when I remembered something. “Wait a minute, there’s something I need to ask you. Do you remember that clay paperweight thing you gave me when you left? What do you know about it?”
“Just that my father brought it back from Crete when I was a kid. Do you still have it?”
“Actually, I gave it to an archaeologist who’s interested in things like that. He’d love to talk with you if you have the time.”
“Sure, I don’t have anything else to do.”
“Great. I’ll let him know that you’re in town. He’s in the hospital at the moment, so you’d have to meet him there.”
“No problem.” Arcas pulled a business card out of a sleek leather cardcase and wrote a number on the back. “You can reach me here. As I said, I have nothing scheduled for the next few days. Good night.”
“Good night, I’ll be in touch.”
Tom and Arcas left me examining the card. It was in Greek, but I could make out Arkadiko Tyri and there was a logo of Pan playing his flute to two identical women with long curly hair. I stared at it, wondering if one of them was me.
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TOM RETURNED AN hour later, tired, hungry, and out of sorts. He kicked off his shoes and stretched out on the couch with a plate of left-over brie and crackers. “Well, that was surreal. What do we tell Cady?”
“Do we have to tell her anything? Can’t we pretend this never happened?” I knew that wasn’t an option, but I was afraid the truth would damage her. She’d always been the child of a hero, martyred to the cause of democracy. I didn’t want her redefined as the child of an adulterer and a liar. I didn’t want her tainted by that man.
“She’s not a child, Amy. She’s twenty-one. It has to be her decision. Who knows? Maybe she wants to be the child of a Greek cheese mogul.”
I doubted it, but I wasn’t sure. Arcas wasn’t the man I’d imagined, and I didn’t know what Cady would make of him. “Well, at least she wasn’t here tonight. That gives us time to think. We’ll have to break the news to her tomorrow.”
Cady was spending less and less time at home and more and more time with her boyfriend. I had my reservations, but she was twenty-one years old. Twenty-one, the number reverberated in my brain and made me shudder. That’s how old I was, we were, when Joanie died. Whenever I thought of my long dead sister I was overcome with regret for all that she had missed. I didn’t want Cady to miss anything. If she was ready for a serious relationship, then I could only wish her happiness, the happiness that Joanie never had. “Carpe diem, gather ye roses, go for it, Sweetie,” I whispered to my absent daughter. “Live your life.”
It was almost noon, so Cady was probably at the hospital. She usually stopped by her brother’s room when she finished her shift, so I could catch her there. But what would I say? Tom and I had argued into the wee hours about what to tell her. I was in favor of delay and deceit, but my husband was an honest man. He wanted to present her with the whole, ugly truth. Why couldn’t we just let her be happy? Why did we have to complicate her life? I dialed the hospital and asked for Nick Savas’s room.
“Hi, Nick, is your sister there? Good, can I talk to her?”
“Hi, Mom, what’s up?” Cady was her usual perky self.
“Something unexpected happened and we need to talk about it. Can you be home for dinner tonight? It’s important.”
“Sure, I was coming home anyway. It’s Jackson’s poker night so he’ll be out with his buddies. Are you OK? ‘Something unexpected’ sounds kind of ominous.”
“We’re fine, it’s nothing like that, we just need to talk. Tell Nick I’ll stop by later with a care package. Love you, bye.” I hung up before she could ask another question. I still didn’t know what we’d tell her, but the truth would be out.
I hesitated before picking up the phone again. I pulled the card Arcas had given me from my pocket and dialed the number, half hoping that he wouldn’t answer, but he picked up on the first ring. The voice on the other end of the line was so familiar that I found myself momentarily tongue-tied, tangled in time, twenty-four again. “Hi, hello, I wasn’t sure you’d be in. I was wondering if you’d have time to stop by the hospital later.”
“Sure, what time do you want me? I’m free all day.