“What the hell was you thinkin’! Huh? Fightin’? Huh?” I intended to have a nice calm conversation with them but I was failing miserably. “You betta look at me when I’m talking to you two!”

“Mama, they started it!”

“Jackie—”

“They did! We just walked by minding our own business!”

Lord knows I loved my child, but she sure set her mind to testing my patience. The social worker said we shouldn’t expect the girls to act normal, like nothing had happened, like we hadn’t been separated from them for years. So, I was doing my best to be patient and understanding, ignoring the lies that slid so easy off Jackie’s tongue and the sadness that had crept up behind Mya’s eyes. I hoped it would all work itself out.

“Mya, ain’t you got nothing to say?”

The two of ‘em sat side by side on the couch, two sides of the same coin: one calm with not a hair outta place and the other with the beginnings of a black eye.

“Mama, you want us to not defend ourselves? That ain’t right. Everybody got a right to defend theyself.”

“Jackie—”

“We wasn’t doing nothing but defending ourselves. Right, Mya?”

Mya sucked her bottom lip into her mouth, chewing on it thoughtfully. She wasn’t as friendly with lies as Jackie was. She hadn’t even offered a word in her own defense, staring out the window like she was hoping a familiar face would walk past our house.

“Since you both been suspended, don’t think you gonna be sitting around here doing nothing. Got a lot of stuff ‘round here that need doing. Come on, let’s go. One of you gone sweep up them leaves in the yard, and the other can wash the windows.”

“But, Mama—”

“Girl, you say one more thing, and I’m gonna lose my mind!”

Neither one of my girls wore repentance too well. No droopy shoulders and teary eyes from them. So, I ain’t expect it and a part of me was ready to give a little anyway.

“I gotta go pick up Nat from school in a little bit. Y’all have your chores done by then, I won’t tell your daddy about this.” Mya’s stare turned ice cold, and I immediately wished I coulda taken it back. “I mean Heziah. I won’t tell him.”

“Okay.” Jackie smiled, taking her sister by the hand. “You’ll see, Mama. We’re gonna be the best backyard sweepers and window washers you ever seen.”

I don’t know about ‘em being the best, but they was still at it by the time the four of us was headed up the walk to the front porch. Mya worked the leaves into a pyramid while Jackie took a rest from singing and wiping down the windows to meet us at the top stair.

“Hey, Mama, see how hard I been working? Got ‘em shining like brand-new now.”

Even in her punishment, Jackie couldn’t turn off the charm. A good part of the reason I hardly ever bothered with it in the first place. It just rolled off her shoulders like rain off a steep roof.

“Mama, how come they gotta wash windows?”

“They lost their minds is what they did. This is what happens when you lose yo’ mind. Now go on inside. Take the twins with you.”

Nat got as far as the screen door before turning back to ask Jackie if she wanted some help, and I stopped to watch. Couldn’t find the words to explain why that wasn’t posed to happen. It was a punishment not a group activity. Jackie saved me from having to explain by simply shaking her head.

“You sure?” Nat’s brow wrinkled with concern. Like the manual labor might be too much for her big sister to handle. “Want me to get some clean water?” she asked, already reaching for the handle of the bucket.

Maybe my girls could’ve used more discipline, but there was one thing they ain’t have no shortage of—loyalty.