Designing Your Own Rituals: Traditional and Alternative
In this book are many examples of rituals, both traditional and alternative. In addition, there are ideas and suggestions for rituals of your own design. In creating your own rites and ceremonies, you can take many approaches. You can devise and enact new customs of your own invention. These new rituals can be pure, simple, uncomplicated events, or they can be incredibly elaborate. You decide. I urge you to avoid too much pomp. Too much planning, building, and painting of sets and excessive researching can create more stress than is really warranted, taking away from the meaning and distracting you from your true intention.
Participating in ritual can change your life. Even practicing one ritual can uplift and inspire you for years, and regular involvement can lead to spiritual riches. Ritual is soul work. Increasingly, with our hectic workday schedules, you may find yourself creating rituals and meditating alone, praying by yourself, and performing daily spiritual practices solo. In addition to planning more intricate proceedings, you should also craft little on-the-spot private rituals that serve immediate spiritual needs. You can celebrate your gratitude to a deity that is special to you or light a candle and meditate at your altar on a holy day. Your rituals should reflect the ebb and flow of you outer life and your inner work.
This kind of ritual is simple and pure; I call it real ritual. Your spiritual pursuits should be a mix of simple, solo ceremonies and more complex ones that you perform alone or with others. The work of the soul is stimulated by interactions with others and grows in your time alone. Rituals enliven and add meaning to each day. Your simple daily ceremonies and practices are the individual threads that weave the fabric of your life rather like a tapestry quilt that grows thread by thread, stitch by stitch, and square by square. You need the threads, the patches, and the squares to hold together the tapestry of a rich, memory-filled, and meaningful life.
In this book, you have been provided with some of the great rituals of the world and many starting points for piecing together your own ceremonies. You can choose from the wealth of correspondences in the appendices to add layers of meaning, depth, and effectiveness, building your knowledge, expanding your experiences, and connecting you to the world’s wise traditions. Also, by keeping a Book of Shadows or personal ritual journal, you will have your own set of measurements and memories of what has worked for you. The appendix gives ingredients that you can add to your ritual “recipe.” Let’s say you want to create a personal and private ritual to get a new job. You can look up the best time to do it in the Ritual Resources section and you will see that a Thursday new moon would be an optimum choice to perform such a ritual.
There are also different divinities you can choose from to call upon for help in this ritual, from jovial Jupiter to the very sympathetic and helpful Lakshmi, to name just two. There are also a variety of herbs and plants you can choose from to assist with money matters, along with correct colors for candles and essences for both incense and oils that supply abundance. When you create your new job ritual, therefore, you can select the right traditional correspondence that matches your need and you are halfway there.
Focus and attention concerning your intention are of equal importance. In terms of the language of your original ritual, you should write from your heart, which will ensure that the words will personally affect you and work for you. Believe in yourself and believe in your intention and the right words will flow. There is no exact science to writing rituals. Just match the words and correspondences to your intention, and you will be a creator of rituals.
It is natural that once you are completely comfortable working with the realm of existing rituals, you should begin to trust you own intuition and create your own. Listen to your inner voice and trust yourself. Correspondences are a start, but you must take a leap of faith and delve into the depths of your own psyche for rituals you create, enact, and share with the world.
While we know there is no exact science to ritual design, there is an art to it, and the knack is developed from participating in group rituals, learning from the experienced elders, performing private rituals, and endeavoring to craft rituals on your own for every season and reason. The art of creating rituals is the work of the heart, and while it is not always easy, it is the work of creating joy in your life. With each ritual, you are taking a step to a reality of your own creation. Rites and ceremonies serve many purposes in our lives. They can be designed to fulfill one person’s wish, help a member of your spiritual circle, or help heal the entire world like the Dalai Lana’s sand mandala ritual. There are no limitations to the scope of rituals you can design. Where there is need, you can supply intention and inspiration and, in so doing, spread bliss in your wake. Rituals can change the world, and your rituals will most certainly change your world. When you are designing ritual, you are really designing the life of your dreams.
Recording Your Rituals
In the chapter on tools for rituals, I recommend creating a Book of Shadows to keep notes on ceremonies you have participated in and witnessed. Your BOS can and should be a document of what works for you in terms of specifics—moon phases, colors, numbers, herbs, etc. You can greatly expand your BOS with notes on your ritual projects and your life as a work in progress. Here should be your musings, your writing of invocations, your hopes, and your intentions. I call this the “journal of the journey,” and it can take any form of your imagination as long as it catches the deep truths of what you hope to accomplish.
Your ritual record need not be fancy, but it should be raw, honest, and real. Tell the stories of what really happened, mistakes and all. Those who are the most truthful and open will gain the most from their record of experience. Not every group ritual will be a smashing success—someone will be grumpy, someone else might say the words wrong, or you will all get nervous and forget what to do. Or nature may change your plans. For example, an outdoor full moon circles planed for a year may be driven indoors by a rainstorm that puts out the candles and wilts every spirit. Nevertheless, I am always encouraged and amazed to discover the so-called mistakes we learn most from. If everything is perfect, the ritual is more likely to slip from memory. Life itself is messy and bumpy. Think of the metaphor of the Navajo blanket in which the weaver, despite his skill, always makes one mistake. The metaphor is that life itself is not perfect, and the blanket should be reflective of life. That one “crooked thread” can be the strongest stitch holding the fabric together.
At one full moon weekend, a woman’s circle organized by Z. Budapest started off badly when several women didn’t show up, failing to help pay for the retreat house. The ever-resilient Z. only noted the resulting blessings. The women present created a coven of thirteen, a number sacred to the goddess. With fewer women, we could cook and clean up faster, leaving more time to hike in the woods and pray. During the first hike, we discovered a natural spring bubbling out of the side of the mountain. Inspired by this miracle of nature, we splashed and bathed and Z. created an on-the-spot goddess water rite. It was the highlight of the retreat, and an unexpected blessing. Pure magic was woven by Z.’s experienced hand with this crooked golden thread. By documenting and sharing the ritual stories, I have learned much about ritual and about myself in the process.