MONDAY, JANUARY 28

I’m standing in the kitchen shoving all my papers

into my bag. I’m wearing my last pair

of contacts. They will last five days

and then it will be time to slip on

the glasses. But for now, the world

looks clear, if not bright.

My mother walks in, and then my brother

and for a moment

we are all standing silently

in the same room, three

pairs of the same cheekbones

and the same wide mouths

frowning for the same

and different reasons.

Did you get in a fight?

she says to my brother.

This is the first time she has seen him

since he hit Justin, the slight bruise

under his eye more like a lilac kiss by now.

David and I exchange glances.

No, he says. Just fucking around

with Justin.

Oh you two are still friends?

I say, here under the safety

of my mother’s gaze.

He puts on his jacket.

I can’t make him answer.

I can only let my eyes

follow him out the door,

hoping he feels them

long after he’s out

of sight.