Dark… it was so dark…
I rubbed my eyes. They were open, but I couldn’t see a thing. Had I gone blind? Where on earth was I?
I was lying on something stony, cold and hard. I was shivering, I couldn’t see, and whenever I moved my ankle it felt as if somebody had stuck a knife in it.
Very slowly, memories came back to me, like bits of a dream when you wake. Looking for Emily… walking through the mine… falling…
“Help!” I shouted as loudly as I could. My voice echoed along the empty tunnels. Would Jenny ever hear me? How long before she realised something was wrong?
I put my hands out and felt rocky walls on either side. There was rock behind me too. In front I could feel nothing – not even a floor; I seemed to be on a narrow ledge.
Suddenly I remembered my phone. Where was it? I searched all around with my hands, but couldn’t find it. I must have let go of it when I fell. It had vanished into the depths of the mine.
That was when I began to cry. I felt I would die there, alone in the dark.
Oh God, please help me, please. You said you would protect me. Why did you let me get into this mess?
Silence. I shouted until I was hoarse; then the silence pressed in again, and the darkness squeezed against my eyeballs.
Help me, God! Help me! Oh, why did you make this happen?
But that was stupid, blaming God. There was only one person to blame really – me! Mum had said to keep away from the mines. If only I’d done what she said!
Sorry, Mum, it won’t happen again. I’m sorry, God – really sorry. Please forgive me. I know I’ve gone away from you, but I want to come back. Am I allowed to come back?
Then a strange thing happened. A kind of warmth and strength went right through me from head to toe. I stopped shivering; I stopped feeling scared.
And I knew God still loved me. Amazing! Even though I had made a total mess of things. Even there, alone in the dark, I was being held safe in the palm of his hand. So there was nothing to fear – not even if I was going to die. Living or dying, God still loved me; he would never leave me or forsake me.
I felt quite calm and peaceful. It was very strange.
And just then I noticed a slow lightening of the darkness. I began to see the pale shape of my own hand. The light grew; not torchlight but a flickering glow like a candle. I could make out the top of the hole, as high above me as a bedroom window. A face looked down.
“Denise, you are an idiot,” said Emily. “Why can’t you look where you’re going?”
I never thought I could be so pleased to see Emily. For a moment I couldn’t speak.
“Well?” she said. “Are you still alive?”
“Yes. But I’ve hurt my foot.”
She moved the candle around the sides of the hole. “Looks like there was a ladder here once. But there’s not much left of it – I don’t think it’s safe. We need a rope or something.”
“Have you got one?”
“Even if I had, I can’t get you out on my own, can I? I’ll have to go and get help. Don’t run away, now.”
She stood up. As the candle moved, black shadows crowded round me, and my fear came leaping back.
“Emily! Don’t leave me here in the dark! Can’t you… can’t you just phone somebody?”
“I haven’t got a mobile,” she said. “My dad won’t let me – waste of money, he says. Anyway, it wouldn’t be any good down here, would it?”
“Jenny’s got a phone,” I said. “She’s outside.”
“All right, I’ll get Jenny to call for help.”
She started to move away, and the light began to fade. I couldn’t help it – I started to whimper with fear.
Emily must have heard me. She said, “I’ll leave the candle here – I’ve got another one. Look, I’ll tell Jenny and then I’ll come back as quick as I can. All right?”
“Yes,” I said in a small voice. “Thanks, Emily.”
I heard her footsteps dying slowly away. There was still a small glow from the candle, which she must have left near the edge of the hole. The light didn’t reach down to me, but at least it was something to look at. It took my mind off the dark, the stillness, the cold.
Where was Emily? Surely she should have been back by now. But maybe – maybe she would never come back. She’d go home as if nothing had happened, and leave me here for days and days, starving and thirsty, all alone.
No! Don’t think about scary things. Look at the light, not the shadows. Think about God holding you in the palm of his hand.
What was that? Footsteps! She was coming back!
“You OK down there?”
“Yes. Glad you came back, though.”
“Jenny rang 999. They’re going to send out the Mountain Rescue team.”
“H-how long do you think that will take?”
“I don’t know. It might be a bit before anyone comes. Look, I’m going to blow out one candle. We might need it later.”
The shadows crawled closer, and I shivered.
“Are – are there any rats living here? Or bats?”
“Not that I’ve ever seen.”
“Do you come here a lot? But why?”
“Mind your own business,” she said sharply. “You know, you’ve really messed me up, Dense. Why’d you have to poke your nose in? This used to be my place that nobody knew about. Now it’ll be all round the village and I’ll never be able to come here again.”
“Sorry.”
There was a long, chilly silence. Water dripped somewhere far away.
I tried again. “I really am sorry, Emily. It wasn’t… I didn’t mean to mess you around, I just wanted to ask you something. About the ghost. Was it…” I stopped, took a deep breath. “Was it really you all the time?”
“Me? You’re joking. You think I would stand there moaning and groaning and rattling chains, just to give you a fright? I’ve got better things to do.”
“Moaning and rattling? But… is that what you thought it sounded like? It wasn’t like that at all.” I couldn’t remember just what I had told her, probably not very much.
“What did it sound like then?” she said curiously.
“It sounded to me like… somebody crying… in the cupboard.”
“Oh,” she said.
That was all, but it was like seeing a hairline crack in the wall of a dam. Sooner or later, you know the dam will burst.
Another long silence. I waited.
“You’re right,” she said at last. “It was me.”