Chapter 18

Truth Night

I dream that Wyatt’s holding me. He reaches under my shirt and places his palms against the skin on my lower back. One hand feels warm and alive, the other is deathly cold. He kisses me and his lips feel cracked and dry. The taste of dirt fills my mouth and a handful of plump, thin-skinned maggots, ready to split from the pressure of their oozing guts, squirm across one cheek and down my chin to my neck. I push him away, gasp for air and wake up screaming.

My mother runs in, with Dad right behind her. When they realize there’s no intruder trying to haul me out my bedroom window, my father goes back to bed. I tell Mom it was just a nightmare.

“I’ll stay here until you fall back to sleep, Annabelle. What were you dreaming about?”

“Just a generic nightmare, nothing specific or memorable.” What am I supposed to answer? “I dreamed that while I was kissing Wyatt, he turned into a decomposing corpse.”

I don’t think my mother’s ready to hear that. She’s no fool, though; she knows me well and can probably tell I’m holding something back. But she keeps quiet and doesn’t pressure me. Instead, she sits on the edge of the bed and watches over me until I drift off. When I finally fall back to sleep, I dream of nothing.

My alarm goes off way too early. My mother apologizes over breakfast on Saturday, before I even leave for practice. She makes no excuses and promises me that in the future she’ll share with me any plans for séances and other assorted supernatural adventures that Oliver, Nathaniel or Wyatt dream up.

I need the truth and I need everyone to stop deciding when they should tell me stuff and how much they should tell me. From now on I want to know everything right away, as soon as everybody else knows it. I need to be an equal partner in this paranormal adventure; after all, I found Daniel in the first place. If it wasn’t for me, we wouldn’t be in this situation.

Nobody has actually lied to me, but nobody’s been telling me the whole truth, either. I’m ready to demand the entire story from everyone. And I’m going to start immediately.

During Saturday morning’s cross-country practice, Wyatt texts me, asking me if he can come over. Do you want to hang out tonight?

On the bus ride home from Boston I finally get a chance to reply. Only if we can talk and you tell me everything.

I promise. No more secrets or surprises. I’m sorry.

Be there at eight. And bring popcorn, with real butter.

After a long, hot shower, I put on my favorite green sweater and a pair of soft, worn-out jeans. Then I blow-dry my hair, straighten it and flick on some mascara. Next I choose a flavored lip gloss from my impressive collection: honey-vanilla, delicious. Wyatt arrives right on time, carrying a box of popcorn and a half stick of real butter. We pop the popcorn in the microwave and I melt the butter in a small pan on the stove. Wyatt pours it evenly over the bowl of popcorn. Grabbing a salt shaker and a couple of Gatorades, we head down the stairs to the basement.

Because I want to talk seriously with him, I choose a movie I’ve seen before, Pride and Prejudice, based on the novel by Jane Austen, who’s my favorite author. Wyatt deserves to suffer through the ultimate chick flick, British accents and all. Plus, Keira Knightly is gorgeous, brunette and flat-chested. She gives me hope.

Wyatt is either too gentlemanly or too remorseful to complain and he sits through scene after scene of drama and witty conversation, waiting patiently for even a moment of sex or violence which never happens. Finally, as Mr. Darcy awkwardly begins to make his feelings for Elizabeth Bennett clear on the big screen, I begin my cross-examination.

“We need to talk.”

He responds by lying down and pulling me over beside him. I push him away and sit up.

“Wyatt. Get up. I’m serious.”

“So am I.” He’s still lying down and he pulls on my arm, attempting to persuade me to cuddle with him.

“We can’t talk if our lips are smooshed together.”

“Damn. I love it when our lips are smooshed together.”

“C’mon. I mean it.”

“Okay, okay, go ahead. You want to talk. So talk.” He sits up.

“The day that you channeled Daniel for the first time you didn’t tell me everything.”

“What do you want to know?”

“What did you see? What did you feel?”

“Let’s start with what I did tell you. When I saw you for the first time in History class, I saw Daniel, too. I felt a powerful connection to you both. I kept trying to talk to you but you kept blowing me off. Then that day in the cafeteria, I watched Connor touch you and I had to make a move. After that things got even more complicated.”

“Complicated? How?”

“I wanted to tell you how I felt about you. More importantly, though, I needed to tell you that I could see Daniel. But I didn’t want to scare you. Most of all, I didn’t want you to think I was a freak.”

“I had a ghost following me around. Doesn’t that place me in the freak category, too?”

“Not quite as freakish as me. At least that’s how I felt at the time. Now I realize you’re a huge freak.”

I punch his arm and not playfully. “Stay serious, Silver.”

“Okay, okay, I’ll stay serious. Just don’t hit me again. I think you left a bruise.”

He rubs his arm and continues. “That Sunday in your basement, I let Daniel in.”

“What do you mean by you let him in?”

“I had a feeling that if I held you in my arms and opened my mind and my soul to him, he’d take over. And he did. I’m sorry I didn’t warn you. If you’re still mad, I know I deserve it.”

The fact that Wyatt doesn’t qualify his apology with any excuses makes me feel better. After all, how could he have explained? It’s all so farfetched. I’m still having difficulty understanding, but I’m getting there. I know that I really want to be in this together with Wyatt.

“Promise me one thing.”

“What?”

“I need to always know if it’s really you or if it’s Daniel taking over. Don’t ever surprise me again like you did the first time.”

“I promise I’ll never do that again, Annabelle.”

“Thank you. At least now I’ll be able to tell the difference as soon as you touch me.”

“How?”

“When you’re you, you’re warm. Incredibly warm all over. You’re like a human Jacuzzi. I sunk into your lap last night and felt this wonderful melting feeling.”

“Here, sink into it right now.” He tries to pull me into his lap and it’s tempting, but I push him away.

“No, we’re talking. This is serious. When you channeled Daniel, you felt unnaturally cold. Last night, when we were kissing, you felt really warm.”

“This is torture, sitting here with you, talking about kissing and looking at you and not touching you. You look so cute. Mmmmm.” He breathes in. “You smell like butter and salt and vanilla, like a popcorn flavored sugar cookie. I need to cuddle with you, just a little. C’mon, Annabelle.”

“No, because I’m trying to make an important point here. You were in control when we were kissing. Daniel didn’t take over. We can’t be in this relationship and kiss and be close if I have to worry about Daniel taking over. I need to know that it’s you I’m kissing, not someone who’s been dead for more than twenty years. And last night I knew. You didn’t let him in. I would’ve felt the cold if you had.”

“You’re right. I kissed you, not Daniel. Both times I let Daniel in, it was a conscious decision. He can’t just take over, not when I’m kissing you, not any other time. I’m in control and I’ll never surprise you again. Don’t worry.”

“That means when he did take over, you had to allow it. You had to let him, maybe even invite him. Tell me more about last Sunday, when you channeled Daniel during the thunderstorm.”

Wyatt sighs and starts confessing everything. “I wanted it to happen. I staged things so it would happen. I purposely got you alone and held you and thought about it. I focused on letting Daniel in.”

“What did it feel like?”

“It scared the hell out of me. I felt like I was dead, but I wasn’t really dead. I still knew what was happening but I didn’t perceive it with my five senses. Daniel had those. He controlled my body and my mind, the actual gray matter of my brain. I sort of half-traded places with Daniel. He got to be me, but I wasn’t him. I was still myself, but without my body. I’m doing my best to explain.”

“You’re doing a great job.”

“Without physically hearing or seeing anything that happened between you and Daniel, I still knew everything. I felt aware and I remembered what happened afterwards. When Daniel finally left my body, I felt hungry right away and about an hour later I was exhausted. Nathaniel told me that would happen every time, so I have to be careful; like I shouldn’t drive when the exhaustion sets in.”

“No operating heavy machinery?”

He grins. “Right, any more questions?”

“Can you take back your body whenever you want to?”

“That’s the tricky part. Nathaniel and I are working on it. Both times I let Daniel in, he left on his own. I don’t know if I could reclaim my body, just because I really want to. Nathaniel thinks I can, but I haven’t had the chance to try it yet.”

“You’re scaring me now. I need to know if you can. It’s important. Doesn’t it frighten you?”

“Of course. The worst part was how cold I felt, cold like the grave, cold like death, freezing cold through and through, down into my bones, down into my soul.”

I shiver just thinking about it, because I, too, have felt the cold. Afterwards, only contact with people who care about me could warm me up: Oliver, Jackson, Nathaniel, my mother, contact with the living. When he notices I’m shivering, Wyatt wraps me in his arms. “We’re in this together, right, Annabelle?”

“Yes, we’re in this together, as long as you keep telling me the truth, no more secrets and no more surprises.”

“I promise.” And we seal the deal with a kiss, while on the TV screen two lovers from another century kiss, too.