breakup prep

Do’s and Don’ts

Your Breakup Do List

• Give them the time they need to work through their feelings.
• Tell them some stuff about your relationship that was good.
• Tell them some stuff about themselves that is good.
• Take responsibility for the breakup (“I’m just not ready for this relationship,” “I’m moving and I can’t keep up this relationship,” etc.).
• Spell out the rules of separation (no more movies together, no more hanging out at each other’s house, etc.).
• Be firm; don’t leave an open door for them to sneak back in and change your mind.

Your Breakup Don’t-Do List

• Don’t offer to “just be friends,” ever!
• Don’t get critical and blame them for the breakup.
• Don’t let them guilt you into changing your mind; their feelings are their responsibility, not yours.
• No hitting below the belt—“you’re just not popular enough,” “your breath stinks,” etc.
• Don’t let them make you out to be the bad guy; you have a right to your own choices.
• Don’t expect it to go easy. Be prepared for them to fight your decision, but stand your ground.

Your Breakup Escape Route

If they handle the breakup badly, remember that their emotions aren’t in your control. You should do what you can to be kind and gentle, but how they react is their responsibility. Everyone has to handle their own emotions. If they start weirding out on you, just tell them that their actions are making you uncomfortable and the conversation is over. I know it sounds dorky, but now is not the time to be cool. It’s time to figure out how to get out of there.