SECTION XIV: DISENGAGEMENT/LOSS OF FAMILY COHESION
Therapist’s Overview
CIRCLES OF PERCEPTION
GOALS OF THE EXERCISE
1. To solicit family members’ perception of their relationships to one another, particularly in those who have difficulty with verbal expression.
2. To implement an activity that will facilitate individual work, followed by an in-session collaboration.
3. To exchange ideas and perceptions of each other and broaden family members’ conceptualizations of how they view themselves.
ADDITIONAL HOMEWORK THAT MAY BE APPLICABLE TO DISILLUSIONMENT WITH FAMILY TIES
• What Am I Thinking When I Am Feeling Depressed? Page 115
ADDITIONAL PROBLEMS IN WHICH THIS EXERCISE MAY BE USEFUL
• Anger Problems
• Communication Problems
• Dependency
• Disengagement
• Jealousy/Insecurity
SUGGESTIONS FOR PROCESSING THIS EXERCISE WITH CLIENT
Weekes and Treat (1992) first introduced the use of circles as a strategy in their work with couples. It was later expounded on by Dattilio (2000), who also applied it to couples and later to his work with families (Dattilio, 1997; 2001). This technique can be used in-session; however, with families it may be more effective as a task assignment, particularly with younger children who may want to elaborate on their schematic diagrams with crayons or colored pens.
EXERCISE XIV.A
CIRCLES OF PERCEPTION
Trying to express in words how we see things can often be difficult. This is especially true when it pertains to families and family members.
Sometimes, a simpler way to do this is to express what we see and how we feel through creative visual designs. Sometimes, the simpler the drawing, the better we are able to get our point across to others. This exercise is designed to help you express your perception of your family as you view it currently and how you would like it to be in the future. Try to be as honest as you can when constructing both drawings. Try not to worry too much about how the other family members may view your designs.
1. Take a clean piece of white paper (unlined). You can use a regular graphite pencil, colored pencils, or even crayons or colored ink pens. Using only one circle to represent each family member, draw how you view your family constellation as it exists. The closer the circles are, the more they indicate how emotionally close you feel those family members are to one another. So, for example, your drawing may look similar to any of the following designs.
The large circles represent the parents or grandparents (adults) and the smaller circles represent the children.
After you have completed your drawing, take the other plain piece of paper, marking it Number 2. Using the same type of circles, draw how you would like to see your family ideally.
Bring both of your drawings to the next session and be prepared to discuss the following:
1. Explain your drawings.
2. How did you feel about doing this exercise?
3. Did it make you think more about how your family members relate to one another?
4. Did you find the task difficult to do?
5. Did you notice a big difference between your first drawing and the second drawing?
6. In what ways did your drawings differ from those of other family members?
