week two
identify your hiding places

hiding behind her fake “fine,” her servant heart, and her spiritual disciplines

Read: Chapters 4, 5, and 6

Opening: As a group, share your first impressions of the masks you read about in the chapters this week. In what ways, if any, do these masks resonate with you?

Discuss Life behind the Mask

Chapter 4  With a Wink and a Smile: Hiding behind Her Fake “Fine”

Let’s be honest about fine. It’s true, there is a cultural surge of authenticity rolling through the church these days, causing “fine” to become less and less acceptable as an answer. But we still give it. We may not actually use the word, but good girls have a knack for creativity when it comes to deflecting questions and avoiding intimacy.

• What is your version of the fake fine?
• Do you tend to hide behind the fake fine out of fear, laziness, or some combination of both?

Chapter 5  Martha and My Many Things: Hiding behind Her Servant Heart

Martha is a great example of a good girl who did not hide behind a fake fine. She demanded of Jesus, “Tell her to help me!” She was not afraid to let people know when she was not fine. Martha’s good girl struggle came from a different place, from the tension between pleasing God and trusting God.

• Can you identify ways in which your desire to please God has clouded your willingness to trust him?

Chapter 6  The Rule Follower: Hiding behind Her Spiritual Disciplines

While it can seem like there is a disregard for the law when we talk about grace, the opposite is actually true. Grace embraces the law, but only inasmuch as Jesus fulfilled it. And his Spirit lives within us. Jesus lived up to the law on our behalf! The law wasn’t given for us to try to keep. It was given to show us we can’t. Read this quote from Dudley Hall aloud to the group:

Grace is not Jesus helping you live up to the law. This keeps us focused on the law. Jesus came to fulfill the law so we don’t have to look at it anymore. I no more listen to what the law is saying, I listen to what Jesus is saying.

• What has been your relationship to the law in your life as a believer?
• In what ways could you relate with Lynne Hybels’s fake Jesus on page 75?

Journal: Consider your thoughts on Mary in the account of Mary and Martha. Honestly record how you feel about her. Perhaps you are miffed that it seems she got off easy, or maybe you are envious of her ability to shirk responsibility for the chance to worship. Last week in your journal, you recorded ways your life may be telling a small story. Have the women answer these questions in their journals:

What kind of story did Mary’s life tell?

What about Martha’s life?

In what ways is your life like the lives of these women?

Truth to Remember: “The former regulation is set aside because it was weak and useless (for the law made nothing perfect), and a better hope is introduced, by which we draw near to God” (Heb. 7:18–19 NIV).

Song: Ginny Owens, “True Story”