The first time Perry saw his classroom at Crosswinds, he was thrilled. A glistening white board with a rainbow of dry erase markers, a thirty-six-inch TV suspended from the ceiling, with WebTV, a VCR, and a DVD player. Perry loved technology.
“Let’s talk about the role superstition plays in To Kill a Mockingbird,” Perry urged his class.
Silence.
“Do any of the characters strike you as superstitious?” he asked.
Nothing.
“Okay, let’s try it this way—are the Hot Steams in chapter four anything to be afraid of?”
The silence was punctured by a most unexpected sound.
“Jerry, Jerry, Jerry—” The TV had mysteriously turned on and Jerry Springer was displayed in all his intellectual glory. Perry walked over and pushed the power button.
“See, the Hot Steams are spirits, and apparently, our TV is haunted.”
“Jem and Scout are afraid of the Hot Steams,” offered Caitlin.
“That’s true,” said Perry. “What do they think will happen to them?”
“Come on down!” The TV had turned back on, and Bob Barker was getting ready to greet another contestant.
“This is odd,” said Perry and he walked toward the TV. Before he could get to it, the channels suddenly starting changing. Bob Barker gave way to Oprah, who led to the return of Jerry, who lingered briefly before Judge Judy made an appearance. She was quickly replaced by the HBO logo.
“This is really odd,” mused Perry. He yanked the plug from the wall. “I’ll report this to the office at lunch.”
So much for the Hot Steams and irrational fears of haints, Mrs. Dubose, and Boo Radley. Perry’s class was too distracted by the haunted TV set to do any work. Perry kept the TV unplugged during his next two classes.
Wednesday was Perry’s Lunch Day. Lunch Day was a Crosswinds tradition, intended to help students and teachers interact in a more casual environment. One day a month, a teacher was “encouraged” (which was the Crosswinds version of assigned) to join the students in the yard during lunch to mingle and talk. “Teachers spend too much time with teachers,” intoned Bob Parrish. “You can learn more from students than you can from teachers.”
When he got to the yard, clutching the brown-bag lunch he had made that morning, Perry was surprised at how empty it was. It seemed like only a few of the students were
at the tables, and they were younger. Perry didn’t know any of them.
Even confusion didn’t hamper Perry’s appetite, so he staked out a shady table and sat down to begin lunch. He was halfway through his sandwich when the yard filled with kids.
Only a teacher would be so nerdy as to bring his own lunch, so the students flocked to the food-service window and a catering truck that was parked at the curb.
“Oh, Perry—is this your Lunch Day?” asked Caitlin sweetly. “You should have told us. We could have told you how to get real food.” She sat down opposite him with a small sushi tray and a diet Coke.
Alex was next, carrying two giant slices of pepperoni pizza and two diet Cokes. “Here,” he said, shoving a can toward Perry. “I bought you a Coke.”
“That’s very nice of you,” said Perry, feeling painfully unhip with his brown bag. “How much is it? I’ll pay you back.”
“No prob,” said Alex. “You can get the next one.”
Soon Perry was surrounded by a number of his students. As out of place as he felt, they seemed perfectly relaxed, as if joining a teacher for lunch was just a typical day. Other than the free Coke, they didn’t seem to treat Perry much like an outsider at all.
“Why was everyone so late for lunch?” asked Perry. “It was empty out here.”
“Didn’t you hear?” said Caitlin. “Danny’s dad brought in a rough cut of the new Ocean’s Eleven for Communication Arts and we all went to the auditorium to watch it. George Clooney is so cute, for an old guy.”
“The movie wasn’t bad,” interjected Alex. “But the music stunk. I mean, even for a rough cut, you’d think they’d come up with better than that crap.”
“It doesn’t matter,” said an exasperated Caitlin. “They’ll
put the real music in later. I just hate when there are no sound effects.”
“I think it’ll do okay,” offered Alex. “Maybe not a big opening, but it’ll have legs overseas and in home video.”
“When does it come out?” asked Perry.
“Not until Christmas,” said Caitlin. “They have plenty of time.”
“So, you have a really cute girlfriend,” said Alex, changing the subject.
Perry waited for someone to answer. Finally, it dawned on him that Alex was talking to him.
“Me?” said a flustered Perry.
“Yeah, remember, I saw you two at the Four Seasons. Besides, you ate at my dad’s table at the fund-raiser. He said she was really cute and that he liked you a lot.”
“That’s very nice of him. I liked him, too.”
“He’s cool,” agreed Alex. “He’s, like, my best friend.”
The conversations that surrounded Perry continued at a frantic pace, with almost every student doing his or her best to keep the lone teacher included. These kids have a confidence and poise I never had at their age, thought Perry. I’m not so sure I have it now.
As kids wandered away from the table, Perry soon found himself alone with Alex.
“Have I ever shown you my watch?” asked Alex.
Perry shook his head.
“Look.” Alex stuck his wrist under Perry’s nose. It was an elaborate Casio with a numeric keypad and several large buttons.
“What does it do? Logarithms?”
“Better than that.” Alex smiled. “It’s a TV remote control. It’ll work on any set, once you figure out the code.”
It took a few seconds for the impact of Alex’s confession to sink in.
“I take it you’ve figured out the code for the TVs here at school,” he said.
“You bet,” said Alex without a shred of concern. “That’s why I bought you a Coke. I owed you.”
“Yeah, I guess you did,” said Perry. At least the classroom is not haunted, he thought.
“We’re still friends, right?” asked Alex.
“Sure, why not?” replied Perry, somewhat impressed at Alex’s chutzpah.
“Great!” said Alex, as if he’d expected no other response. “See you tomorrow.”
And to think that the other teachers dreaded Lunch Day.