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Marin
I couldn’t get comfortable in Jasper’s guest room. After we slept together, he deposited me in the guest room with some of his old clothes to use as pajamas and padded down the hallway to his own room. I used the shower – partly because I felt dirty and partly because it had three different shower heads and I couldn’t not try it out – and slipped into his comically large clothes.
I even crawled between the extravagant cotton sheets and closed my eyes. But sleep wouldn’t come. How could I have slept with him? Even thinking about the encounter made my cheeks flush. Certainly, it was Jasper’s plan all along. The only reason he brought me home or took me to the gala at all.
He’d sent me a tight, low-cut dress, and I’d put it on and played along with his game. I’d let him dress me like a doll and do with me what he pleased. Lying in his bed felt like lying to myself, an attempt to convince myself that what had happened was okay. And it wasn’t. It couldn’t be okay. Sleeping with a man like Jasper and enjoying it could never be okay.
I jumped up, grabbed my purse, and tip-toed down the hallway. I walked a few blocks away before calling Kayla to come pick me up.
“You know what time it is, right?” she asked, her voice thick with sleep.
When she picked me up, her hair was pulled back tightly in two braids, and she had her pink flannel pajama set on. Miraculously, she didn’t ask me why I was wearing an oversized shirt and long, athletic shorts and standing on the corner of a neighborhood I would never be able to live in. At least, not right then.
As we drove to work the next day, each of us scheduled for the lunch shift, the questions were endless.
“Why did you leave his house in the middle of the night?”
“Where did your clothes go?”
“Are you finally going to tell me how big he is?”
“Wait, did he hurt you?”
I sighed, unable to handle or deflect anymore of Kayla’s questions. “No, he didn’t hurt me,” I said, though the ache between my legs said otherwise. Jasper was rather large, and he hadn’t been exactly gentle.
“You’re being weird,” Kayla said. “Two days ago, you didn’t care about Jasper Black at all, and now you’re sleeping with him at work and going to galas with him? It doesn’t make any sense.”
I wanted to tell Kayla the truth, but I knew Jasper wouldn’t want me to. Plus, I had no way of knowing whether she’d be in any kind of danger. Jasper hadn’t seemed concerned by the appearance of Angel at the gala, but the man had left me with an unsettled feeling. He felt dangerous, and I couldn’t take any risks.
“He’s nice,” I said, realizing how ridiculous the words sounded coming out of my mouth. Even if you’d only seen Jasper in passing, you’d know he wasn’t nice. Some people, beautiful ones, in particular, don’t need to be nice to be well liked or respected. That was Jasper. Strong and serious, a dash of mysterious. Not nice.
Kayla raised an eyebrow but didn’t turn towards me. Instead, she kept her eyes on the road. “Just be careful.”
“Be careful? Why?” I asked, surprised by her somber tone. I could always count on Kayla to make a joke out of anything, but now her mouth pulled down in a frown.
She shrugged. “I don’t know. I just have a bad feeling about all of this.”
“I’ll be fine,” I said, though inside, I felt anything but.
***
Word of Jasper’s and my relationship spread through the restaurant more quickly than I could have guessed, especially considering I’d only told Kayla. When the third person came up to ask me to confirm my status as Jasper’s girlfriend, I shot Kayla a deadly glare.
“Yes, we’re dating,” I said, returning to wiping down glasses at the bar.
Before they could say anything else, the door to Jasper’s office opened, and he stepped into the restaurant, quieting all conversation. I hadn’t even realized he’d come into today, meaning he must have made use of the side door. Everyone greeted him warmly, but I could feel all of their gazes fall on me, waiting to see how I’d react.
Rather than give them any kind of pleasure, I returned to wiping down glasses and stacking them on the solid wood shelf that hung above the liquor bottles.
“Can I talk to you in my office?” He’d whispered the words as if everyone in the entire room hadn’t stopped talking to overhear our conversation.
“I’m busy,” I said, working hard to ignore the flutter in my stomach.
He leaned in closer. “And I’m your boss.”
I sighed. That was going to be annoying. Clearly, there was something forbidding this in the employee handbook. Though, Jasper had probably written the employee handbook. Also, he owned the company. Also, the last thing Jasper cared about was rules.
He turned and headed back towards his office, not seeming to notice the amount of attention he drew wherever he went. I sat the glass I’d been holding on the shelf and followed after him, cheeks burning.
When I made it to his office, I closed the door behind me, glad to be away from prying ears and eyes. Though, perhaps I should have left the door open. Would everyone assume we were having sex in here now that the door was closed? I tried to convince myself it didn’t matter what everyone else thought, but it clearly did.
“As you already saw,” he said, lowering into his office chair and gesturing to the open newspaper spread on his desk. “Our plan is off to a really great start.”
“Is this a progress report?” I asked, standing by the door, arms crossed. “Are you bringing me in here to tell me how I can improve?”
“I’m bringing you in here to give you money, so why don’t you be quiet for five minutes and listen to me.”
I paused. Jasper wasn’t usually so blunt. Like most men, he typically let his actions do the talking. If possible, my face turned an even deeper shade of red. “You’re giving me money?”
“More specifically, I’m giving the ‘Big Sibs’ money.”
Nothing made any sense. The same guy who had ordered the deaths of countless men and forced me to strip in this very office – the memory of which sent nervous goosebumps up my arms – was going to donate to charity?
“Why?” I asked.
“Because you told Kayla I donated money to the mentorship program, and now I will.” He pulled out a checkbook. “Plus, it will help solidify our relationship. I care about the things you care about. That sort of thing. Who should I make the check out to?”
I didn’t want his money, especially when I had no way of knowing how he’d acquired it, but then I saw the faces of the kids in the ‘Big Sibs’ program. The way their faces lit up when their mentors arrived. The way they celebrated receiving a new sweater and a box of unbroken crayons for their school supplies. The money, regardless of where it came from, would do a lot of good, and I couldn’t turn that down.
“Nobody uses actual checks anymore,” I said, moving forward and lowering into the chair across from his desk. I’d been standing on my feet for a few hours, and it was nice to have a break. “But you can make it out to ‘The Big Sibs of Harris County’.”
Jasper signed his name in small, sharp letters, and slid the check across the table towards me. “Would you like to go to dinner with me tonight?”
My hand was hovering over the check when he spoke, and I paused, unsure. Was the money a bribe? That wouldn’t make any sense considering he was already blackmailing me. Why would he need to bribe me if he could just threaten my life again?
He must have noticed my hesitation. “The check isn’t a trick. I’m just making good on my promise,” he said.
Reluctantly, I grabbed the check, folded it in half once, and slid it into my back pocket.
“I’m busy,” I said.
This was true. Kayla had been begging me for days to do something with her, so we were going to stay in and watch an endless amount of trashy television. The evening would probably turn into a massive question and answer session, in which she asked non-stop questions about Jasper, and I did my best not to answer them. Honesty, I was sort of dreading the entire evening, but it was the perfect excuse to stand Jasper up.
“Sorry, I suppose there has been a misunderstanding,” he said.
“How so?”
We felt so stiff and formal with one another, and it was hard to imagine we were the same people who, only the night before, had been naked on the white tile of his kitchen. Now it seemed as if it was hard for us to be in the same room at all.
“You’re going to dinner with me.” His tone left no room for disagreement, but that didn’t stop me.
“I’m busy,” I repeated, standing up and turning towards the exit. “I have plans.”
Suddenly, Jasper was there in front of me, blocking the only way out. He slid his hand to my waist, then down until his fingers dipped beneath the waistline of my freshly laundered work jeans. He ran his fingers along the fabric, and then along my skin, moving slowly towards the button. In one expert move, he unfasted the button and pushed his hand deeper into my jeans, the zipper opening to allow him. His fingers grazed over me.
“Break them,” he instructed.
I shook my head and swallowed hard. “I can’t.”
He pushed aside the silk material of my panties and twirled a finger over my most sensitive area. I moaned and hated myself for it. “Yes, you can,” he said.
My head moved slowly from side to side. Was I disagreeing with him? I couldn’t tell anymore. I was entirely too focused on what his finger would do next. Jasper trailed his finger downward, and then pushed it inside of me. I reached out and wrapped a hand around his arm, steadying myself while he probed in and out of me.
“Come with me,” he said, though I had a feeling he was actually saying something else.
Still, remarkably, I managed to resist him. “No,” I said, the single word the only thing I could manage to get out.
He added a second finger, moving in and out of me faster, and then massaged my rosebud with the pad of his thumb. I felt my legs going wobbly, and my entire weight was being held up by Jasper’s chest.
“Come with me,” he said again, whispering the words into my ear.
Words were entirely beyond me now. The only thing I could focus on was the clenching in my abdomen, the warmth threatening to burst at any moment. Jasper kissed the skin of my temple and left his lips pressed there, his breath warm on my skin.
“Come,” he said.
This time, I listened.
I buried my face in his chest and moaned, somehow having the sense to try and disguise the noise from my coworkers who were no more than fifteen feet away. His fingers pulled out and then plunged back into place, curling inside of me while his thumb circled me, sending shocks of pleasure through my body.
As I finished, the last waves crashing ashore, Jasper pulled his fingers out of me, moved my panties back into place, and buttoned my jeans. “I’ll see you tonight.” He walked to his office door and held it open, ushering me back into reality while the last muscle contractions were still residing.
I moved through the rest of my shift in a daze. It was a busier lunch rush than normal, but I barely noticed. I kept stealing glances at Jasper’s office, wondering if he was still inside and what his finger was doing now.
“Sorry, what did you say you wanted?” I asked a man in a red trucker hat who had already repeated his order twice.
“A. Cheese. Burger.” He annunciated the words as though I may have recently suffered a blow to the head.
I wrote down the order, only half certain I’d gotten it right, and submitted it to the kitchen. Kayla sidled up to me as I moved towards the bar to grab the man his drink, though I could no longer remember what it was he’d asked for.
“You need to pull yourself together, girl,” she whispered. “Everyone is starting to talk.”
“About what?”
“About what?” she mocked, making her voice several octaves higher than hers or mine. “About you and Jasper, obviously. Everyone knows you went in there for an afternoon delight earlier, and now you can’t seem to wipe that moony look off of your face and get back to work. It’s annoying.”
“That is not what happened,” I said, mouth open in fake shock. Kayla raised an eyebrow at me. “Fine, that is what happened, but it’s not why I went into his office.”
“Why did you?”.
“He asked me to go to dinner with him tonight.”
Kayla opened her mouth to say something, but then closed it, her lips mashing together in a straight line.
“I told him I couldn’t go, but—”
“But then his dick persuaded you otherwise,” Kayla said, holding a hand up to stop me. “I get it. Fine. If I had a rich boyfriend who looked like that, I’d ditch me too.”
“It isn’t like that, Kayla,” I said, wishing more than anything I could explain everything to her.
She frowned. “Yeah, it is, but it’s okay.”
She went back to her tables and didn’t talk to me again until our shift was over.