Give it to me, give it to me, why won’t he give it to me? No more crying, no more growling, no more whining.
“You’re not trying hard enough. You don’t want it badly enough, I guess.”
I want. All I am is want. I want him, his blood. What do I have to do?
“Remember me, Sera. Remember yourself. Say my name.”
No.
“Erik.”
Blood.
“Say it, Sera.”
Meat.
“My name. You have to say it.”
Flesh and bone crunch crunch in my teeth.
“Say it, damn it. I see it in your eyes. You know who I am. I know you’re still in there. I see you. Glimpses. Your sister needs you, and you’re giving up! I thought you were a fighter. Bloom needs you. I need you. Don’t leave us. You have to come back, Sera.”
Anguish, pain, misery. Face is wet. Salt drips in my mouth. Want him so bad. Want his blood. Want him. Don’t care which.
Go away go away. Let me die. This hurts. It hurts so bad.
“Say it, Sera, please.”
On my tongue, a dab of him. A taste. I want more.
“You want it, don’t you? How badly?”
It hurts. Remembering hurts. Blond hair, blue eyes, teeth, and fighting like two dogs growling in the night. Everything has to die. Why not me?
Bloom.
Father.
Mother.
They all go away. Why haven’t I gone away too?
“Please, Sera. I love you. I’m not leaving you. I’m not giving up unless you do. And you’d better not give up.”
Erik is here. Erik didn’t leave. I don’t go away because he keeps me here. He loves me? Why?
“Please,” he pleaded. “Say my name.”
Streams poured from my eyes. Hurt flowed in those rivers, carrying pain out of my heart and down my cheeks into puddles on the floor. Such a big deal over a stupid little word. Just spit it out already. All this buildup for such a tiny moment. I didn’t even want his blood anymore. I only wanted him. I wanted him to keep me and never go away. He said that one little word could make that happen if I believed him. Do I believe?
He stretched out, lying beside me on the cold ground outside his railcar, and closed his eyes. I shifted, and something rattled. Only then did I notice the cuffs and chains binding my hands. That explains a lot.
He took my fingers in his, trusting me. I didn’t want to bite him anymore. He couldn’t know that. He trusted me. He loved me.
Why?
“Erik?” My voice sounded as though it came from the bottom of a long, dry well. He didn’t react. Maybe I had only said the word in my head.
“Erik?” I tried it again, putting more oomph into it. It burned my throat, but in a good way.
He sighed as his eyelids cracked open.
“Why would you love me?”
His eyes closed again, black lashes fanning over dusky cheeks. He had such a stunning face—a Michelangelo angel etched by the elements. His lips spread into a wide smile. “Because you’re a fighter. And you never give up. You’re smart and loyal and beautiful and courageous.”
“Wanted to give up. Was very afraid.”
“Everyone feels that way sometimes.”
“Not you.”
“Yes, I did. Every single day.”
“But you didn’t give up.”
His eyes opened, and he gave me a look of tenderness. “Neither have you.”
“How long?” I didn’t have to clarify. He knew what I meant.
“Two weeks.”
My head spun with the shock of it. From the day he’d saved me from Timber’s attack at the river until the moment of the bite, barely a week had gone by. He had spent less than a week with me as a human but two with me as a monster. I shook my head, wondering how I could’ve merited that kind of devotion.
He sat up fast as a striking snake and caught my face in his hands. His eyes were dark and brutal. “Never do that again.”
“Do what?”
“Try to leave me.”
“I didn’t try to leave, Erik. I just...”
“What?”
I glanced away, unable to hold his intense gaze. “I didn’t know if it was worth staying.”
“What changed your mind?”
“Hope.”
“What are you hoping for?” He leaned close, his breath blowing over me.
“Bloom. I want to get Bloom back. And—” How could I lose my nerve now? After everything that had happened.
“And what?”
“And I want you.”
His lips curled at the corners. His eyes slipped closed. “Say it again.”
Lord, how I could’ve used a sip of water right then. Water, not blood. What a relief. “I want you.”
“And I want more from you than that.”
“Why am I not surprised?”
“You didn’t come through all of that merely for want, Sera. Tell me the truth.”
“You said I only had to say your name.” I scowled. “Everything that’s tumbled out since then has been gratuitous. I figure you owe me a big fat steak dinner by now.”
He chuckled. “You want out of those chains?”
“That’s not funny.”
“I’m dead serious.” Erik rolled away, coming to a crouch on the balls of his feet. He pulled something from his pocket and dangled it in front of me.
The key. “Bastard.”
“You love me, Serendipity Blite. You want your freedom? Then all you have to do is say it.”
“I’d say anything to get these cuffs off.” I rattled my iron bracelets for emphasis.
“Then what’s the holdup?”
Raising my chin, I howled his name like a wolf. “Erik LaRoooux.”
“We have moved past saying my name. Now you have to tell me you love me.”
“I hate you.” I didn’t, actually. But I felt utterly exposed, and denial was the only self-defense mechanism left in my arsenal. If he wanted to torture me, then it was only fair I return the favor.
Throwing back his head, he laughed and slithered over to me, holding the key out of my reach. “You smell terrible. I’ll unlock you and give you a bath if you tell me you love me.”
I refused to look at him. “You’re desperate.”
“At least I’m not the one who smells like a two-week-old corpse.”
“You’re mean too.”
He shrugged and waggled his head. “Just telling you the truth.”
“Where’s Dwivedi?” I glanced around the room as if I might find the wizened scientist hiding in a corner. “He’ll let me go.”
“Not due till tomorrow. You wanna spend another night out here—alone?”
I glared at him.
He laughed again before turning serious and leaning close. “You love me.”
“If you’re so damned sure of it, why do I have to say it?” I huffed, folding my arms over my chest. My cuffs rattled again. “Should I tell you the grass is green and the sky is blue too?”
“Pretend like I’m dumb and you have to explain it to me. You love me.”
“Maybe.” Baby steps. “But I don’t like you very much right now.”
He grinned. “You love me.”
“You brought me back from the abyss. I feel very grateful.”
“You looove me,” he said with a silly, romantic look on his face.
I couldn’t help but giggle. “I do.” I loved him desperately. Vulnerably. But knowing it and admitting it out loud were two different things.
“What?” He leaned in, putting his ear near my lips.
“I do. I love you.” And then I bit his ear. Not hard, mind you, but enough of a nip to make him yelp. Waggling my eyebrows, I gave him a hungry grin. “Maybe I’m not fully cured.”
He unlocked my bindings. “Bath first. Then we’ll see who wants to eat whom more.”