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Lily felt as though she'd been slapped in the face. She'd been surprised to see Edward walk into the factory, as she'd heard he was to be gone for another week yet, at least, and wondered if his sudden return meant his travels had not gone well. For his sake, she hoped that was not the case.
When his eyes had fallen on her upon his entrance, she'd not been able to stop herself from going over to him and saying hello. Now she wished she'd remained firmly at her station. Escape had been all around her there—the packing room, the wash area, the other side of the room, for goodness' sake. Had she picked any one of them to run to, her fantasies about Edward would still be intact. But she had not. She had gone straight to him, smiling like a fool when he must have been burning up inside.
It was only a hello that had passed between them, but there had been much in that hello. Mrs. Dickinson, he had said. Not Lily. Not Miss Dyer.
"He knows," she muttered, shutting her eyes tightly. She really was a fool, just as her husband was so fond of telling her. Pretty, but not too pretty. Smart, but not too smart.
"He knows," she repeated and fought back the tears that threatened to roll down her cheeks. Of course, he knew. It had been bound to happen sooner or later. Somehow, she had succeeded in convincing herself that it would be later.
Who had told him? His father? One of the girls? It didn't matter. The damage was done either way.
She and Edward had been on rather friendly terms since he'd settled in Blisspeak with his father. Before that, she'd only ever seen Edward occasionally when he'd come for a visit. There had always been rumors about Charles Saunders' son, but those had mostly stemmed from his absence, which many found quite mysterious.
When Mr. Saunders had made the announcement that Edward would be staying and taking the office across from his—Silas Tucker's old office, she noted, which had been absent since his arrest—the man's mystery had turned out to be no mystery at all.
In speaking with Edward, she'd learned that he simply preferred larger cities, hence he'd live in New York until now. The majority of their factories were in the Midwest, however, and with Mr. Saunders' ill health, he was no longer able to travel to them for inspections. So, Edward had come to take over.
Nothing very intimate had passed between Lily and Edward since his arrival. At least... not at first. The revelation of his coming to Blisspeak to help his father had been uttered nonchalantly when she'd brought him tea one afternoon. Other than that, it had been mostly passing comments on the weather and the occasional remark of something in the news.
Still... there'd been a spark in his eyes that had been impossible to dismiss. Their conversations had begun to deepen. Talk of weather had turned to talk of the fall, and that had turned to talk of festivities and dances. To questions such as what Lily's favorite time of year was and why, of what his favorite pastry was and how often he got to enjoy it. They were small things, but they were personal things.
On the last trip Edward had returned from, he'd greeted her warmly. He'd even dared to touch her elbow. Today's greeting had been much colder. She'd seen the darkness in his eyes as he'd called her by her married name, and she cursed herself for not making her matrimonial state clearer to him from the outset.
Now he would hate her. She sighed as she returned to her station, wishing, as she often did, that she could disappear.
Despite his feelings toward her, he was still the most handsome man she'd ever seen. His obvious fatigue coupled with his anger could not tarnish that. His dark hair had been swept back with pomade, and his face was clean-shaven. His perfectly tailored clothes fit his muscular body well, and he was several inches taller than her, at least six-foot-two. Perhaps even an inch or two more. He must have made a formidable figure in his business dealings.
Lily had no intention of wallowing in the imaginary circumstances of their relationship and the very real pain she was feeling as a result. They had no relationship, she reminded herself. He was her boss’ son. She must move past it all.
Besides, she had no room to blame Edward for anything. The fault in her current situation lay with her. She had given him her unmarried name when they'd first met, though it had only been done out of reflex.
She'd only been married a few months and most factories preferred unmarried women, afraid they'd lose married women too quickly when they started a family. Lily knew that Charles Saunders held no such concerns, but she had known so little about Edward that she'd instinctively introduced herself as Miss Dyer instead of Mrs. Dickinson. She had not meant to deceive him. Only once the deception had been established, it could not be easily corrected.
It had not seemed such a large deal at the time. She had not realized then that her relationship with Edward would become slightly more confidential than the average worker and boss.
She drew in a deep breath and let it out. Eventually, she moved the glass she'd been polishing to the packing room where she used to work with Della before her promotion. Lily hated to admit she was envious of her best friend, preferring instead to attribute her feelings not to jealousy but to a desire to do better for herself.
Della deserved the promotion she'd been given. She'd been at the factory longer than Lily and therefore had seniority as well as more experience. Lily was happy just to help in the offices from time to time, an occurrence that had become more common since Edward had joined his father permanently.
She'd had a slight expectation of helping in Mr. Saunders' office today and worried when Della never sent word for her. What if Edward was so angry with her that he'd forbidden Della from asking for her assistance? Would her job in the packing room also be in jeopardy?
Lunch arrived, and Lily gratefully hurried to the lunchroom where she took out her leftover stew and ate it cold. She waited for Della to come and join her as usual, hoping that she might gain some insights into Edward's thoughts, but she never showed.
Lily listened to the chatter of the other workers, which was always quite lively during the lunch hour. It was a much-needed break from the tediousness of their work. Only today it rattled Lily's nerves rather than soothed them. The constant chatter gave her no opportunity to clear her head.
Where was Della? Just how angry was Edward?
Her thoughts were running in circles.
"Did you hear about Mr. Saunders?" asked Patty Simms, one of the other women who worked in the packing room.
"What about him?" asked someone at her table. "He's not taken ill again, has he? Old Saunders needs a good woman to watch over him; that's what he needs. I guarantee you if he had a wife, she'd never let that gastric ulcer of his get the better of him."
"Not Old Saunders," said Patty. "His son."
Lily's ears perked up. The other women leaned forward. Lily was not the only one who'd noticed Edward's good looks.
"Edward Saunders?" asked Patty's friend. "I saw him walk in this morning. Looked a little haggard to me. It's all that traveling. If you ask me, he needs a good woman, too."
"That's just it," cried Patty. "He's got one."
"One what?"
"A woman."
"No!" cried several of the women in the lunchroom. It was not just Patty's table who was listening any longer. One thing the workers here enjoyed was a good bit of gossip.
"Yes," said Patty. "Some woman from over in Thunderbend."
"That piddling little town?" asked one of the women. "Who can a fine man like Mr. Saunders be engaged to there? It's hardly any bigger than Blisspeak."
Patty shrugged. "Her father's name is Waterson. He owns a bunch of steel factories, and Old Saunders and the girl's father are dead set on merging their companies together. They stand to make a fortune if they do. Glass and steel are both doing quite well right now, you know." She spoke with such authority that no one questioned her.
Lily felt her face begin to burn. She quickly threw away her trash and hurried from the lunchroom.
Della was not at her desk outside Charles Saunders' office, and Lily wondered if Edward had sent her on an errand. She crossed and uncrossed her arms, pacing the floor beside the desk.
"It can't be true," she said, realizing even as she said it that she had no right to be angry.
She was married. Edward had a right to his life. She ought to be happy for him if he was engaged. They had shared a few sweet moments together, a few kind words, nothing more. But it burned her up inside to think that he was so angry with her for her slight deception when he'd deceived her in much the same way.
She stood outside Edward's door, trying to calm her nerves. She could not allow him to see her in such a state as this. If he did, he would certainly know that he had caused it, and she would not give him the satisfaction.
You're being irrational.
She told the voice in her head to remain quiet while she tended to important matters.
She raised her hand to knock on Edward's door, only she couldn't do it. What if Edward confirmed what Patty had said? What if it were true? Her fantasy would be destroyed forever.
But isn't it already destroyed?
"Not quite," she muttered to herself. "Not yet."
If Edward confirmed the rumors of his engagement though, it would be. She hovered uncertainly then lowered her hand and turned to go. As she was passing Mr. Saunders’ office, she heard a noise from within. It sounded like glass breaking. She hurried to the door and knocked quickly on it.
"Mr. Saunders?" she called. She hadn't seen him come in with Edward, but he might have come in later and she'd simply missed it. When there was no answer, she knocked again. "Mr. Saunders?"
Worried that he had come to some hurt, she opened the door. Edward was alone in the room, mopping up a broken glass and spilled drink with his handkerchief. He looked up at the sound of her entrance.
"Oh, excuse me," she said, startled.
Edward looked equally startled to see her. His eyes brightened for a moment then quickly turned dark. "What do you want?" he snapped. "You should know better than to enter my father's office without knocking first."
"I did knock."
He glanced at her, clearly disbelieving her statement.
"I did," she replied, somewhat haughtily. She did not care for the accusation in his eyes. "I only entered without an answer because I heard the break of glass and was worried for your father. I thought it was him in here. This is his office."
Edward's lips pressed together. "Perhaps you did. I was distracted and may not have heard the rap at the door. I apologize." He went back to cleaning the spilled drink off the desk, haphazardly throwing the broken glass into a wastebasket.
"Where's Mr. Saunders?"
"At home. He asked me to check on things for him this morning. He was feeling unwell."
He did not look at her as he spoke. His handkerchief was soaked with brandy. He cast a look her way and must have caught something in her expression that he felt needed explaining.
"I'm feeling under the weather myself," he said, "and thought a bit of brandy might be in order. I hadn't any in my office, so I came in here to get some from my father's collection. Della's gone to the apothecary for me to see if he might offer some relief from my sinuses."
She nodded. "Of course."
She drew in several breaths, studying his face. Did he look like a man recently engaged? A man in love? It was impossible to tell.
"I can clean that for you, if you like." She took a hesitant step in his direction and her eyes widened. "You're bleeding," she cried then hurried to him, reaching for his hand without thinking.
He looked down as she took his hand, wet from the drink he'd spilled, and folded it into hers. She took his handkerchief and began to dab at the cut.
"The injury's not bad," she said. "It's only superficial."
She looked up and felt his brown eyes dig into her. She blushed and looked away, then let go of his hand, returning his handkerchief.
"Forgive me," she said. "I only wanted to help." She turned away, heading for the door.
He spoke quickly, stopping her with his words. "Lily, wait..." She turned to him, the sound of her name making her heart skip fast. "What happened to your eye?"
She paused, locking eyes with him. "I fell," she said, the lie falling from her lips automatically. She knew no one believed them, not anymore, but she could not help herself.
The color rose in his cheeks, and she thought he looked angrier than she'd ever seen him. She longed to know if the anger was directed toward her or her husband, or perhaps both?
"Is there anything you need, Edward?" she asked.
"Not from you," he said, then looked taken aback by his own remark. "Thank you, Mrs. Dickinson."
Lily drew away. His tone made her blood run cold.
"I'm sorry if I've offended you," she said quickly. "I didn't mean... that is, I never meant... I never meant to lie to you." Then she remembered the lie he'd told her as well. "I don't think I'm the only one here who ought to apologize though."
Edward's eyes widened. "What can I possibly have to apologize for? You hid your marriage from me."
She felt the full weight of the matter on her back, pressing down on her as though she were carrying a pail of water on each arm. Large pails.
"I'm sorry," she said again, so used to apologizing that she could not hold on to her anger even when she had a right to.
Edward drew in his breath and sharply replied, "Do stop with your apologies. They are as bad as your lies. Now get out of here before I say something I might soon regret."
The breath left Lily's chest. She turned and fled the room.
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