| |
A rolling cloud of mist slowly melted and became a curtain, while a distant murmur of profundity slowly faded into the soft song of a Balearic breeze. Hyienna blinked rapidly as he desperately tried to capture the memory of that other place, lingering between the waking world and somewhere strange that sort of felt like a dream.
She was there again, the old woman, haunting those silent dark hours like a spectre of doom from some Dickensian ghost story. She always spoke, but Hyienna could never quite recall what she’d said by the time he’d fully woken. The notepad beside his bed was of little help as dawn’s pale shadows quickly fled once the veil of the night was melted by the morning sun.
Hyienna rolled over and scribbled that thought down, even though it wasn’t strictly speaking a part of his dream. He blearily flicked through the pages of his notebook, trying to discern some pattern or flash of inspiration from the catalogue of fleeting impressions that had haunted him since his arrival on the island. It had only been a few days, but he couldn’t escape the nagging feeling that the topsy-turvy world of his nocturnal subconscious was a lot more clued in than the rest of him.
He sat up, his eyes immediately focusing on the battered antique wardrobe in the corner of his rustic yet very comfortable and homely room. There was an odd unreality to the idea that the greatest mystery of his unremarkable life rested quietly in a dark corner, just behind a couple of shirts and a pair of jeans he’d managed to bring across from Ibiza. Once again indecision paralysed him as he studied the patterns of the early sun as it dappled the room through cracked shutters and shifting curtains. What was stopping him? Why didn’t he just march across his own room and pull that innocuous looking rucksack out into that bright Mediterranean morning? There was nothing and nobody to stand in his way, save for the frisson of fear that froze his very soul when he considered the unearthly mystery waiting in the wardrobe. He had no rational explanation for his ideas, but Hyienna instinctively understood that it was forbidden, declared strictly off-limits by some unwritten edict, decreed by some higher authority that he didn’t really want to consider too closely. Although the old woman had specifically given him the...thing, he knew he was merely a messenger, a caretaker, a courier tasked to take whatever the hell it was on the next leg of wherever the hell it was travelling to. Deep down, he already knew that the idea of a destination had no place in meditations on such an impossible darkness. This was something eternal, like the tides, the moon and the sun; it was something fundamental to everything a man could know, yet every contemplation revealed nothing that could be grasped by mere plodding rationality. The thing in the wardrobe was everything, yet it explained nothing. Despite the impenetrable metaphysical mystery in his charge, Hyienna was certain of one thing; he knew full well that endless spirals of introspection and speculation were the sure road to ruin, especially for him.
He was more than glad when the sounds of mundane humanity saved him from the supernatural when he heard a car approaching. Without really knowing why he was hiding, he rolled out of bed and stood beside the peeling balcony shutters, peeping out as soft chiffon curtains swayed in the warm Balearic wind.
Solomon’s Range Rover glinted in the bright morning sun as it slowly, almost gingerly, rolled to a stop directly below. It was as though the driver didn’t want to get dust on his paintwork, something which Hyienna could easily imagine.
He felt kind of awkward as he secretly watched Solomon clamber out of the driver’s seat while Yasmina walked out to greet him. Hyienna felt even more awkward as he watched them embrace more like lovers than friends. He’d been hoping he was wrong about Solomon and Yasmina, as the last thing Hyienna wanted was to be caught in the middle of some unpredictable love triangle just as he was beginning to reconnect with his only meaningful relative. By witnessing proof positive of something he desperately hoped wasn’t true, Hyienna knew he was screwed either way and there could be no good resolution to such a situation. He and Sarah hadn’t spoken in years, and he had no right to go poking into her personal affairs. On the other hand, there was no way he’d be thanked when Sarah found out about the two of them and began to wonder how it was that Hyienna hadn’t noticed anything.
Hidden behind those billowing white curtains, Hyienna silently cursed the pair of them as Solomon and Yasmina stood in a semi-embrace, discussing their respective futures. The meandering island breeze lifted fragments of conversation onto the balcony, whether he wanted to hear them or not. It was pretty clear that the conversation in the deserted car park was a well-worn and well-rehearsed one. The two of them clearly had some kind of history and it seemed that Yasmina wanted them to seize the second chance they’d been given, whatever that meant.
In the meantime, Solomon was doing what guys like Solomon always did. He was trying to have his cake and eat it too by placating his lover and explaining how it was impossible for him to leave his fiancé for this, that or some other bullshit reason. Although Hyienna didn’t really know Solomon, he was completely unsurprised and more than a little angry to hear such a big strong man twisting and turning like a lightweight wrestler as he tried to turn her affections to his own advantage, even if that advantage stretched no further than the bedroom.
He’d heard enough. Hyienna left the window, sat on the bed and hurriedly donned some clothes before reaching for his lightweight boots, which weren’t much good for keeping out water but had proved reliable against the dust and sharp rocks that seemed to cover most of Formentera’s surface.
Solomon’s early arrival clearly meant that he hadn’t driven over for a cold beer or a good meal; the place was deserted and Hyienna sure as hell didn’t want to be around if they decided to come indoors. It was clear that Solomon and Yaz were engaged in some kind of extramarital affair, even though neither of them was actually married. Still, at least one of them was pretty damn close to it though.
Hyienna quickly figured out that Sarah had to be told. She might well hate him for it but he knew he had no choice but to cut his losses. Better to be hated for telling the truth than despised for complicity in a betrayal of the heart.
With his mind made up, he opened the battered but sturdy wardrobe to retrieve his battered but sturdy jacket. Of course, he tried not to look at the worn and well-travelled rucksack nestling innocently in a shadowy corner, but he knew it was a forlorn hope.
Quickly throwing on his jacket, he pulled out the rucksack handed to him by the witch in the cave. Witch was a word that came to mind far too easily. There was very little weight to the bag as he set it on the bed and stared down at the otherworldly mystery contained in a creased chunk of cheap luggage. Hyienna’s fingers hovered above the zip as he tried to convince himself that he should look inside, just to make sure that he hadn’t simply imagined the whole thing and been irrationally frightened of some ordinary square of black fabric. But then if it was just a square of black fabric, why should he hesitate to simply open the bag? Once again, he pondered how there was nothing to stop him, save a nagging but insistent voice somewhere deep inside that warned such things were not for him. He had been entrusted with some great responsibility for a purpose as yet unrevealed.
Hyienna was surprised at the rush of relief he felt as he placed the innocuous looking rucksack back in the wardrobe and closed the doors. Feeling like a smoker who’d resisted temptation, Hyienna felt a sense of calm accomplishment as he picked up his bike keys and quietly let himself out of his sparse but rustically comfortable room. He quickly made his way down the stairs and into the silent and darkened bar area. Luckily, Yasmina and Solomon were still outside so he quickly made his way behind the bar and slipped out through the kitchen door.
* * *
THE SOUND OF DISTANT laughter swirled in the warm ocean breeze as Hyienna watched the busy deck of a large yacht anchored just a few hundred yards offshore. It was a very impressive sight, but Hyienna had little doubt that it was chartered for the day. Pay the deposit, hope the cheque doesn’t bounce and snap that all-important selfie before the prosecco runs out. Still, the beautiful people on board seemed to be having a good time regardless, and maybe that was all that really mattered.
He turned to see the familiar figure of his older cousin striding confidently along the quiet beach towards him. For a moment Hyienna could easily picture Sarah on that self-same slice of chartered heaven bobbing out there in the bay, imagining that she would feel right at home in such luxurious yet ultimately fraudulent surroundings. He smiled and waved as she drew nearer, silently admonishing himself and wondering how on earth he’d become so cynical and world-weary. Of course, he immediately answered his own question as he mentally ticked off a long list of things in life that seemed to be solid but had turned out to be little more than painted scenery and stage management. All show and no substance.
Hyienna couldn’t help smirking as he glanced back at the boat to watch the beautiful boys and girls diving into the ocean and lounge on various inflatables that were probably meant to be ironic in some way. Sure enough, there on the deck stood a woman with long hair, a large sun hat and a camcorder in hand, panning it this way and that as she made sure to capture the hilarious inflatable flamingos, hamburgers and even a plastic desert island, complete with solitary palm tree.
He turned his attention back to Sarah, who looked quite the beach queen in a fetching skirt and blouse ensemble, casually carrying her shoes in one hand. Before he knew what was happening, Hyienna felt a broad smile on his face as he walked towards her.
They embraced warmly, although Hyienna was confused at the kaleidoscope of feelings that glittered and refracted inside him. He was glad to see her, but at the same time he felt an inexplicable sense of guilt, as though they were engaged in some clandestine or immoral activity.
He quickly stepped back, wanting to open up a little distance as the irrational feeling of guilt threatened to spoil the moment. “You’re looking good as always. You’ll have to tell me what your secret is.” Once again Hyienna silently criticised his own weakness as he realised, he lacked the courage to tell his cousin flat out about Solomon and Yasmina. Maybe she already knew and didn’t care, or more likely she would be angry at him for breaking such ill news and generally poking his nose in. Right there and then Hyienna changed his mind and decided not to raise the subject unless she asked him a direct question. After all, keeping quiet was one thing but lying to protect people to whom he owed nothing was way over the line.
He was surprised when Sarah linked her arm with his as and began to slowly stroll along the shoreline, but he didn’t dwell on it too much. She seemed happy, very happy in fact, and he silently prayed that nothing would spoil the moment.
“So, what have you been up to at Yasmina’s place? Apart from drowning in gossip and good food, I hope.”
Hyienna suddenly wondered why he felt defensive; after all, he’d only been there for a few days and he’d spent his time just chilling out, thinking about the woman in the cave and walking on the beach. “You know how it is; I’ve just been finding my way around and doing a lot of reflecting.”
Sarah nodded. “This is a perfect place for thinking, for reflecting. You know I’ve missed you these past years. It’s been hard after everything that happened.”
Hyienna opened his mouth and almost blurted out that it sure as hell didn’t look too hard from where he was standing, but he thought better of it. Even that it was true, his saying so wouldn’t change anything.
It was almost as though Sarah could sense what he was thinking. “I’m sorry for just up and leaving like that, but I guess we had to deal with everything in our own way. Sure, we have a beautiful home here and a good life, but that’s not why I left.”
Hyienna had tried to hold back, but the dam finally burst. “At least you could leave; the cops wouldn’t let me go anywhere. Eventually they had to back off for lack of evidence, but that’s just a fancy way of saying that we think you did something, but we can’t prove it.”
“Listen, Hyienna...”
It was too late though, Hyienna’s reserve had buckled, and the torrent of pent-up emotions was streaming through, dredging everything up in its wake. “Actually, the police were the least of my problems. Do you have any idea what it’s like to live with a cloud of suspicion like that following you around? Losing my job was just the start, bad publicity they said, but not even that was enough to get me off the hook. You know what happened the first time I walked into Big Freddy’s bar after I was released?”
Sarah stopped walking and turned to face him. “No; what?”
“They gave me a round of applause and a great big cake. What the hell do you think happened?”
“But the police cleared you.”
Hyienna gave a short, bitter laugh as he turned to gaze out across the glittering bay. “Oh well, I guess that’s okay then. It didn’t really matter that half the city thought I was some kind of crazed child abductor; no, a good word from the cops and everything was just fine...apart from the death threats and the odd sprint to escape a kicking, not to mention being completely unemployable basically forever. Yeah, I had nothing to do with whatever happened to that poor kid, but I’ve had to pay for it all the same. Hell, maybe I deserve it. Okay, so I never would’ve hurt the little tyke but I sure as hell did nothing to protect him either.”
Sarah put her hand on his arm. “It wasn’t your fault, everyone knows that.”
Hyienna sighed heavily and let his head fall back. “He was just a toddler, and I was a grown man. Isn’t that what we're supposed to do for toddlers, even if they’re not our own? At the very least we’re supposed to make sure they don’t get kidnapped in the middle of the night by Christ knows who.”
“I’m sorry, Hyienna, I never knew how hard it was for you. I hope we can put this behind us and move on, for both our sakes.”
Hyienna shook his head sadly and gazed into his cousin’s beautiful brown eyes. “You can never put it behind you. Every night I wonder if he’s out there somewhere. I fantasise that he ended up with some rich and loving couple who couldn’t have kids of their own, but that’s something out of a storybook because none of us will ever know how it ended. One thing we do know is that life is no fairy tale.”
There was silence for a while as both of them gazed out across the ocean, deep in thought. Eventually Sarah spoke. “If it makes you feel any better, I think about poor little Samuel every day too. At the beginning I thought it was going to drive me crazy. The worst part of it was how they even made me doubt you just for a minute. Just for a little while.”
“And now?”
“Now I know that you weren’t to blame for what happened, but I had a choice of falling into darkness forever or reaching out for the lifeline that Solomon gave me.”
Hyienna spread his arms wide and turned a slow circle. “Some lifeline! Still, you always did have a great sense of style, so I guess an overbearing and boorish boyfriend is just fine, as long as he dresses well.”
Sarah’s chest rose as she took a deep breath, then fell as she let it out slowly. “Listen, I know how difficult Solomon can be, but that’s only because he’s had to struggle and work hard for everything he’s got. He’s an honourable man and he cares a lot about me. I really don’t know what would have happened if he hadn’t been there for me.”
“Sure, well, none of us can change the past.” Realising that his cousin just couldn’t grasp the subtle difference between being depressed about a bad situation and being locked up as a potential child abductor, Hyienna quickly re-evaluated his plan to take Sarah into his confidence about whatever the hell was lurking in his wardrobe. Although it was so great to see Sarah again and reconnect, Hyienna felt even more isolated as he gazed at the collection of inflatables bobbing jauntily around the anchored yacht.
Sarah poked her little cousin in the ribs. “You’re staring again. Don’t be getting all deep and moody on me, it doesn’t suit you.”
He turned and smiled. “I’m glad you’re happy. In the end, what else is there?”
Sarah seized her chance. “Speaking of happy, we’re having a get-together on Saturday, and we’d love to have you over.”
Hyienna hesitated.
Sarah pouted. “Now come on, Mr frowny face, it’s not like you’ve got big plans or anything.”
“Maybe I have a date.” Hyienna retorted with mock indignation.
“You need a night off from drinking, walking and thinking. Well, from the walking and thinking anyway. Besides, Solomon and I won’t be the only ones disappointed if you’re a no-show.”
Hyienna raised one eyebrow in his best James Bond fashion, a trick that never failed to make his cousin smile. “Don’t think I know anyone else around here, well, not really.”
She playfully slapped his arm. “You’re too hard on yourself, you know that? You might not have a very high opinion of the impression you make, but you certainly had an impact on Kate.”
Hyienna folded his arms and frowned. “Kate? Your pal? The one who looks like she’s permanently modelling for some fashion catalogue?”
“You could have at least pretended you hadn’t noticed her.”
“Would you have believed me?”
Sarah feigned intense thought for a moment. “Probably not. Anyhow, that charming, dusty Charlie Brown act of yours must’ve hit the right spot because she’s done nothing but ask me about you since you breezed back into my life.”
“Now you’re just teasing. That’s mean.” Hyienna scoffed.
“Suit yourself, but if you don’t want to spend a relaxing evening with not one, but two beautiful ladies, why on earth did you bother coming here in the first place? You can shut yourself away in Barcelona just as easily as you can here.” Sarah’s forehead creased and her face fell, her tone suddenly becoming sombre. “Be wary of Kate.”
Hyienna looked at his cousin quizzically, waiting until a strolling middle-aged couple had passed out of earshot before speaking again. “That’s no way to talk about your friend. Do I sense a little feminine jealousy here?”
Sarah suddenly looked uncommonly thoughtful. “Kate’s a beautiful woman; not only that, but she knows that she’s beautiful and she knows how to use that beauty too. You know I dream about her sometimes, but the dreams are always odd, strange.”
“You mean there’s such a thing as a normal dream?”
She looked at Hyienna although her eyes seemed not to focus as her voice took on a light, distant quality. “Bewitching, that’s the word. You know it’s funny, even though Kate’s been nothing but kind and supportive, I’m somehow afraid of her.”
“Some friend.” Observed Hyienna dryly.
“It’s hard to explain. Kate is warm and funny and really smart too, yet I sometimes feel like I only know a tiny part of her. That sounds really weird; I don’t want to make out like there’s some kind of crazy bunny boiler just waiting to be unleashed, but there’s something oddly wild and dangerous underneath all that grooming. It’s like she can make anybody do anything, and she can make anybody fall in love with her, man, woman or child.”
Hyienna tried to lighten the mood. “Hey, there’s only room for one half crazy dreamer in any family, and I got the gig first.”
Sarah continued as though Hyienna hadn’t spoken. “A bewitching siren, that’s her. I’ve never known anyone with as much personal power and charisma as that woman, but I sometimes wonder if it’s all just to wreck passing sailors on the rocks. After all, if she is so easily loved, what value could it hold for her?”
“You’re not doing a very good sales job here, big cousin. Don’t you worry about Solomon with such a bewitching siren around the place?”
A smile spread across Sarah’s face and suddenly she was back in the present. “I already know Solomon’s in love with her, just like I am, but it’s not like that. Like I said, Kate commands the affections of whoever she wishes, and I just don’t want my little cousin getting hurt.”
“Good job I’ve got you to look out for me then.” Hyienna stared back out to the party yacht glinting in the bay.
“Kate is wonderful, but just be wary. She doesn’t live by same rules that the rest of us have to follow.”
Hyienna watched the inflatable island as it slowly separated itself from its plastic companions and began drifting towards the open ocean, as though pulled by a different current reserved only for itself. “Well, with all this drama and mystery, how could I say no? There’s just one thing.”
“Sure, what?”
“Just tell your fiancé not to call me Hyena. I know he’s the kind of guy who likes to rip on folk, but he’d do well to remember that we’ll be related by marriage one day.”
“How wise you are, Charlie Brown.”
Hyienna playfully elbowed his cousin. “You never know, I might beat you to the altar yet.”
Sarah smiled, but the mirth quickly vanished from her face.
Hyienna wondered if he’d accidentally hit a raw nerve, but he didn’t feel much like pursuing the subject. Like most things in life, the conversation with his cousin hadn’t gone even remotely according to plan, which more or less fitted in with the grand scheme of his own uncertain course. Seemingly from nowhere, a mysterious and alluring woman had been thrown into an already chaotic and somewhat bewildering mix of experiences. Hyienna was mindful of his cousin’s warning, but he figured he had little to lose by getting to know a beautiful woman. Besides, he knew nothing would come of it anyhow. His own backstory was the most potent anti-aphrodisiac known to man, even though he hadn’t done anything wrong.
He glanced across at Sarah, who seemed to be deep in thought. Unwilling to break the silence, Hyienna looked out across the bay to where the cartoon island bobbed and twisted on its journey out to sea. If any of the beautiful people from the boat had noticed its lonely departure, they sure as hell didn’t seem to care. After all, why should they give a damn about what happened to one cute, amusing but ultimately useless piece of plastic? It was a peculiar thing, but Hyienna suddenly found himself wishing the plucky little inflatable well as it began to fade against the bright blue of the ocean. It pained him to think that a lump of plastic swept out to sea had garnered more sympathy and goodwill than his own recent departure from a place that simply didn’t want him around anymore.
Hyienna fervently hoped Formentera would be different.