Half an hour later Constable Pike had gathered a line of suspects. They were all standing in a row along the finish line. There weren’t many people about now. Just a few spectators waiting for the last couple of stragglers to finish the race.

Thousands of paper cups littered the street and mud dripped off everything. All the other athletes and spectators had gone home to clean up. The town looked like it had suffered some sort of mud-related natural disaster. In a way, it had. Although the mud run was really more of an unnatural disaster.

Just then, one of the remaining spectators broke into bellows of delight. ‘That’s it, Val! You can do it. Come on, nearly there!’ It was Russ Pilsbury, the man who’d had a heart attack in Mr Lang’s office.

On the course a brown shape was moving towards them. Not at great speed, but at a steady, exhausted jog.

‘I’m so proud of you, Val!’ cried Russ.

‘Val? Isn’t that Mrs Pilsbury from boot camp?’ asked Tom. ‘How’s she doing?’

‘She looks like a mud-covered zombie,’ said April. ‘But she’s still moving.’

‘Good on ya, Mrs Pilsbury!’ called Tom. He called this in entirely the wrong direction, but it’s the thought that counts.

Mrs Pilsbury staggered across the line and fell into her husband’s arms.

‘I’m sorry I wasn’t supportive of your fitness goals,’ said Russ. ‘I just missed your face at breakfast every morning.’ He leaned in to kiss his wife, but then thought better of it. That could wait until after she’d cleaned the mud off.

‘Oh, Russ,’ said Mrs Pilsbury. ‘I never cared about getting fit. I just wanted an egg and bacon roll that I didn’t have to make myself.’

Now Russ did kiss her. He had married a good woman.

There was a loud sob. The Peski kids turned around to see Ingrid dabbing away tears. ‘This is the most romantic thing I have ever seen,’ she blubbed.

‘Really?’ asked Loretta. ‘I mean, it’s nice, but Val and Russ are no Romeo and Juliet.’

Dad put his arm around Ingrid and she wept into his shoulder. ‘There, there,’ said Dad awkwardly. ‘Um … would you like a handkerchief?’ He pulled a gardening glove out of his pocket and Ingrid blew her nose on it.

Not all the suspects were happy to wait patiently while the investigation took its course.

‘This is an outrage,’ protested Maya. ‘This town is practically out of the dark ages. You so can’t stand to see a woman win your race, you’ve dragged me into a police line-up.’

‘It’s not because you’re a woman,’ said Constable Pike, trying to stay calm and patient, which was hard because it was not in his nature. ‘It’s because you were in the top twelve finishers ahead of the people in the bank at the time of the robbery.’

‘You say that,’ said Maya, ‘but Indigenous people are nine times more likely to be detained by police.’

‘The person identifying the criminal is blind,’ said Constable Pike. ‘He literally can’t see what colour the suspects are.’

‘Besides, they’re all brown,’ said April.

Maya gasped. ‘That’s racist.’

‘No, it’s a fact,’ said April. ‘The robber was covered in mud.’

‘Fortsätt bara,’ Ingrid muttered in Swedish.

‘We all know you can speak English now,’ said Fin. ‘You might as well say what’s on your mind.’

‘I said, just get on with it,’ said Ingrid.

‘Okay,’ said Constable Pike. ‘I’m going to bring our eyewitness out here.’

‘Earwitness,’ corrected April. ‘He’s an earwitness not an eyewitness.’

‘I’m going to bring the witness over,’ continued Constable Pike. ‘As we go along the line and I point to you, I want you to say the phrase …’ He glanced down at his police book and read out the words, ‘Hand over the money.’

Constable Pike went over to his car, where Tom was waiting.

Maya got out her phone. ‘I’m calling my lawyer.’

‘It’ll take him hours to get here,’ said Fin.

‘But it will only take him seconds to alert the national media to the travesty of human rights violations taking place,’ said Maya.

‘Put it away, you will hold things up,’ said Ingrid testily, which is a show of great anger for a Scandinavian. Unfortunately, Maya had not spent much time in Scandinavia and was unfamiliar with the warning signs.

‘I will not be treated …’

She didn’t get to finish her sentence because Ingrid plucked the smartphone from her hand and lobbed it into the ornamental fish pond in the middle of the garden.

‘Why did you do that?’ demanded Maya.

‘Because it was easier than picking you up and throwing you in the fish pond,’ said Ingrid dispassionately.

‘Fight!’ said April happily. She started so many fights herself, she was always keen to see others do the same.

‘How dare you!’ yelled Maya. ‘I’m a national icon.’

‘You are a pain in the rear,’ said Ingrid.

‘That was a $2000 phone,’ said Maya.

‘Then you are a pain in the rear who pays too much for electronics,’ said Ingrid.

‘If you don’t want me to press charges, you owe me …’ Maya started to cough, but she managed to get out, ‘… two … thousand … dollars,’ between wheezy breaths.

‘Not going to happen,’ said Ingrid.

‘You will …’ began Maya, but she had to stop talking because she couldn’t control her coughing fit. She was gasping for breath between coughs.

‘If it will save the trouble, I can help,’ said Dad, pulling out his bulging wallet.

‘Do not give this woman anything,’ Ingrid said firmly to Dad, taking hold of his hand.

‘Are you all r-r-r-ight?’ Joe asked Maya. She was bent over and supporting her ribs as she coughed now.

‘It’s just asthma,’ gasped Maya. She pulled an inhaler out of her pocket and took two puffs.

‘But we don’t want any more trouble with the authorities,’ said Dad, glancing nervously at Constable Pike.

‘Just hand over the money,’ demanded Maya.

‘That’s him!’ declared Tom, pointing towards the sound of Maya’s voice. ‘I’d recognise that deep gravelly voice anywhere.’

Maya was still coughing, but she managed to splutter out, ‘This is ridiculous.’

‘It is her!’ agreed April. ‘I recognise the voice too! I knew it. Anyone that good at sport can’t be trusted.’

‘A Ventolin inhaler briefly lowers a person’s voice,’ said Fin. ‘She must have had a puff right before she entered the bank.’

‘You have no evidence against me,’ coughed Maya. ‘He’s blind. No jury will believe …’ She coughed a few more times. ‘… him.’

‘No,’ agreed Loretta. ‘But what have you got under your shirt?’

‘Loretta,’ said Joe, blushing.

‘This is no time to be squeamish,’ said Loretta, peering at Maya’s chest. ‘I may be a fifteen-year-old schoolgirl, but I know a lot about underwear.’

‘It’s true,’ agreed Dad. ‘She bought the ones I’m wearing now and they’re very comfortable.’

‘This woman was a B cup yesterday,’ said Loretta. ‘Now she’s a D cup!’

‘I can’t arrest someone for that,’ said Constable Pike, turning red with embarrassment.

‘You can if the reason they’ve gone up two cup sizes is because there’s $10,000 stuffed in their bra,’ said Loretta.

Everyone stared at Maya’s chest.

‘You can’t search me unless you arrest me,’ said Maya.

‘I don’t think that’s true,’ said Constable Pike. ‘I’d just have to get a lady constable over from Bilgong, and I’m pretty sure I’ve got justifiable cause for a search.’

‘You wouldn’t do it,’ said Maya. ‘The newspapers will have a field day. Police brutality. That’s how they’ll describe it.’

Constable Pike paled.

‘I don’t have a problem with brutality,’ said Ingrid, stepping forward and reaching out to grab Maya.

But Maya was a two-time Olympic silver medallist. She had skills. She sidestepped Ingrid and took off running across the park.

‘Quick, after her!’ cried April, sprinting after Maya herself, Pumpkin close on her heels.

Maya had already leapt over the picket fence, demonstrating perfect Olympic hurdling form.

Constable Pike was on the radio calling Bilgong for backup. He was a man who knew his limitations, and an inability to outrun Olympic athletes was one of them.

‘She’s getting away,’ said Joe. He took off running too.

‘Not on my watch,’ declared Loretta. ‘Come on, Daisy.’ She grabbed the reins of her water buffalo and leapt up on its back.

‘You named your water buffalo after Daisy Odinsdottir?’ asked Fin.

‘It seemed appropriate,’ said Loretta mischievously. ‘Come on, Daisy, giddy-up!’ The water buffalo took off galloping.

Up ahead, April was doing her best to keep up with Maya, but she was no match for the athlete’s long legs. When Maya leapt over a bus bench, April tried to follow but tripped and tumbled headfirst into the gutter, landing awkwardly on her other leg.

‘Quick, after her!’ April ordered Pumpkin. But as much as the little dog loved biting people, he loved April more. He didn’t want to leave her. April blinked back tears of frustration as Pumpkin stayed where he was and licked her face instead.

Joe streaked past, not even noticing his sister sprawled on the ground. He was hot on Maya’s heels.

‘Don’t worry,’ April told Pumpkin as she gave him a hug. ‘Joe will bite her instead.’

Joe was running as fast as he could, but he couldn’t gain ground on Maya. She was just too fit and fast. He realised the only reason he had been so close behind her in the race was because she had stopped to rob the bank. Unless Maya tripped or fell, there was no chance of him catching her.

Joe could hear a thundering sound behind him. The sky was bright blue. It didn’t make any sense for a storm to be coming. The thundering grew louder. Joe didn’t look around. He didn’t want to take his eyes off Maya for a second in case she disappeared among the mud-stained obstacles scattered all over the town.

‘Grab my hand!’ Loretta cried from behind him.

The thunder was deafening now. And Joe heard a loud snort of breath. Daisy the water buffalo was literally breathing down his neck as she hurtled towards him. Joe leapt to one side to get out of the animal’s way. His arms flailed as he tried not to topple over. Loretta leaned over the side of the water buffalo and latched hold of him. ‘Jump up!’ she ordered. Joe instinctively did as he was told. The next second he was sprawled across the back of the galloping buffalo as Loretta guided her to follow Maya.

Joe was going to be shaken off by the rumble of the beast’s feet. He was being jiggled about everywhere.

‘Grab hold of me or you’ll fall,’ ordered Loretta.

Joe did not like touching girls. He didn’t want them to get the wrong idea. And by wrong idea he meant right idea about all the inappropriate things racing through his mind. But he didn’t like toppling headfirst onto the ground at high-speed either, so he did as he was told and grabbed Loretta’s waist.

Joe heard the whizz of an engine behind them. He looked back to see Fin, Tom and Neil racing towards them on a quad bike. Neil noticed April and Pumpkin sitting in the gutter and, without a second thought, or really even a first thought, he gallantly leapt off the back of the quad bike to come to her aid. Fin and Tom kept on with their pursuit.

Maya had vaulted over the fence into the school grounds. The water buffalo came to a skidding halt, but not quite soon enough. Daisy slammed into the school fence, putting a water buffalo-sized dent in the cyclone wire.

‘Quick, after her,’ Loretta urged Joe.

Joe couldn’t see that there was much he could do, but Loretta was not the type of person you ignored.

He slid off the buffalo, scrambled over the fence and took off after Maya. She was heading towards the school’s bowling greens where her light plane was parked out the back. He couldn’t let her get to it. Maya was flagging. Joe had had a rest while riding the water buffalo, whereas she had sprinted the whole way from the gardens. Joe put on an extra burst of speed.

But it wasn’t going to be enough. Maya reached the bowling greens. One green had been covered in a mud obstacle. But Mr Popov had saved the other before Fin’s work team could get to it, so it was still as flat and smooth as a sprint track. Once Maya got to the plane there would be no way he could stop her. He could see someone sitting behind the joystick. A pilot must be getting it ready for her.

Joe ran down the hill. Maya was twenty metres away, on the far side of the green. Joe reached down and grabbed the first thing to hand, a lawn bowl. He gave it a big underarm swing and rolled it as hard as he could at her ankles.

Now Joe was the best lawn bowler Currawong High had seen for sixty years. In his hands a lawn bowl could do magic. The bowl raced across the manicured grass in a big arc, away from Maya at first but then arcing back in, getting closer and closer until WHACK! It scuttled her. She was knocked off her feet by the bowl and toppled headfirst into a bench on the far side of the green.

There was the thundering sound of Daisy approaching. Loretta must have somehow got her through the fence. The water buffalo galloped past Joe. Loretta leapt down and grabbed hold of Maya firmly.

‘I’m citizen’s arresting you for robbing the Currawong Bank,’ said Loretta with great authority for a fifteen-year-old.

‘Ugh,’ said Maya. She rolled over with a glazed look in her eye and it was clear she was concussed. The impact of the fall had also made the contents of her sports crop top escape. Bank notes where tumbling out of her shirt.

April and Pumpkin finally caught up with them. Neil was giving April a piggyback. ‘You got her!’ April exclaimed. Neil might have said something too if he wasn’t gasping for breath and too deliriously happy to have carried April five hundred metres to be able to speak.

Pumpkin raced forward and jumped excitedly on Loretta.

‘You can’t outrun a water buffalo,’ said Loretta proudly, giving Daisy a pat on the nose.