That’s What I Said

It pricks the arm like poison,

knowing that some things, once chosen,

are yours and that meanwhile the night comes

much too soon this time of year.

There are things you will not be allowed to say.

You think them anyway, until they become you.

The two boys in shirtsleeves are in the street

again, skateboards balking

where the sidewalk buckles in geologic fault.

They seem mirthless, as they yell and fall

and the cold mist tries to veil them from passing cars.

Yesterday’s storm slammed the leaves to the ground.

Hiss, hiss, the tires go, against the scraps

of piano music, not Chopin today, from upstairs.

Someone tried to understand you once

and he’s dead, though not from trying.

Clunk, clunk, goes the landlady’s daughter,

trying out her new boots on the back stairs.

Things have narrowed to a point

and no gorgeous diction can get you out of it.

There’s just the flats of your feet,

willing each new step from empty pockets

where change, keys, pens once rattled.

You threw them into the bushes on the next block

and then came home with the grey linings hanging

from your jacket like socks.

You forgot to check the mail

and when you opened the door

you brought the night in with you.