| |
––––––––
The second the song came over the radio, I cursed that my hands were full and was therefore unable to turn off the beautiful notes of Lady Antebellum’s, ‘I run to you’ quickly enough. It had been nearly two months of banned love songs and as the lyrics seemed to tell my life’s story it was of little wonder why...
‘I run from hate, I run from prejudice, I run from pessimists, but I run too late...I run my life, or is it running me?’
And wasn’t that just the question right now I thought as I struggled to the table with yet another armful of research papers my friend Yosef had given me. Damn my Spotify account recommending songs!
I quickly got to the table only dropping a few scrolls and one book, doing so just as the lyrics continued with...
‘Run from my past, I run too fast, or too slow it seems... when lies become the truth...’
“Yeah you can say that again!” I said picking up my fallen articles with annoyance and slapping them back on the counter just before grabbing my tablet and turning it off just as the beat kicked up with,
‘That's when I run to you... this world keeps spinning faster, into a new disaster so I run to you...I run to you baby’
“Nope, not now and not ever,” I commented as I killed the music and the second I did, that was when I felt it. Like a presence so powerful it sucked all the energy from the room and left me near gasping for breath. And that difficulty in breathing wasn’t just from the moment you realised that you were no longer alone, but it was more when you realised who it was that stole that solitude from you. Because when you were on the run there was only one being out there you hoped not to find in the room with you...
The hunter.
And I knew my time was up when the first words spoken that smooth hypnotic voice of his that told me,
“Now that is a shame.”
I sucked in a deep breath, placed my hands on the table just to steady myself as his name slipped from my lips,
“Lucius.”
Then I felt him stepping up behind me and I tensed as I heard those forbidden words whispered in my ear at the same moment he took possession of my body. He did this by gripping my arms and pulling me back against the strength of him,
“Found at last, my Khuba.”
I gasped and started to struggle in his hold, making him grip me tighter before banding an arm across my torso, telling me softly,
“Ssshh, be still now...I won’t hurt you.” I tensed, closed my eyes as the tears started to rise as I told him fiercely,
“And I told you once before...you already have...now let go of me!” At this I felt his arm turn to steel and the rumbling vibrations at my back matched that of his low growl of frustration. But he had no clue as to what he was doing to me right now. How much pain he caused me by being back in his arms once more.
Gods, but how I just wanted to relax back against him. How I wanted to let him hold me and say to hell with my strength. One that seemed to be sucked right out of me, especially when he suddenly turned me to face him and snarled angrily,
“And I told you, that I never would!” Then, before I could stop myself, I slapped him across the face as hard as I could, until the pain lashed across my own skin. Then, before he could react in any way, I lost every good sense I had and grabbed him by the shirt, yanking him into me. After this I reached up and crushed my lips to his the second I pulled him down to meet me! Doing so with so much passion, it felt as though it had the power to burn us both to Hell for our sins!
His own reaction only managed to fuel my own into holding onto him tighter. This was because he had one hand fisted in my hair at the back of my neck and the other fisted in the material of my shirt at the base of my spine. There he held me to him as if he feared that I would suddenly disappear through his fingers. As if he was doing everything in his power to prevent that.
Somewhere in the back of my mind I had that nagging voice telling me that this was wrong. That I shouldn’t be doing this, that he was no longer mine and I didn’t belong to him. That I was angry and upset. But above all else, it was questioning why he was even here and why was he kissing me so desperately, it felt as if he needed me like he needed his next breath? None of it made sense, least of all the way my hands curled around his neck as if to anchor him to me, never wanting to let go.
But then I started to think of everything I had been through these last two months. I thought of all the pain and suffering he had caused me. I thought about what seemed like the endless tears and cursing his name as I woke from my nightmares. And then after all of this my mind forced me to ask myself...what was I doing?
So, I let my fingers uncurl from his hair, and just as they started to lower, he knew. He knew that he was losing me because he pulled his lips back enough to tell me on a dangerous promise,
“No, I am not fucking letting you go!” Then he pushed me back until I was trapped between him and the table. So this time I had no chance of escaping him as he really kissed me. And foolishly, I opened up once more, doing so on a whimpered moan, as he plundered my mouth, tasting me, drinking me in and consuming me whole. He ravished me just with his kiss, and I swear it felt powerful enough to brand the memory to my damaged, fragile soul.
And I wasn’t the only one who was affected in this way, as when he finally released my lips, doing so now, as we were both panting, he placed his forehead to mine and told me,
“By the Gods, how I’ve missed you.” I swallowed hard, so hard that he could hear it, that along with the feel of my emotions getting too much to hold back as I shuddered in his arms. Which was why this time, instead of simply pulling away, something I knew Lucius would react to in a negative way, I tried a different tactic. Because I couldn’t let him kiss me like that again...I just wouldn’t survive it.
“Please, Lucius...please.”
“What is it, my Khuba?” he whispered down at me, as his hand cupped my face before caressing a thumb across the apple of my cheek. His beautiful eyes scanned my face, my hair, even down to my neck as if needing to take in every inch of me. Gods, but just with that look alone he made me feel so treasured.
“Please, give me time... this...this is all too much to take in,” I whispered, finally braving to look up at him, meeting his eyes as his gaze came back to mine. He released a heavy sigh before placing his forehead to mine once more, a rumbled sound of frustration coming from him before he lifted his head so he could kiss me there.
“Alright Amelia, I will give you this time...”
“Thank y...”
“But it is time that will be spent by my side,” he said cutting me off and giving me little choice in the matter. I looked away from him, knowing that right now I didn’t have it me to argue. No, I just couldn’t think much more past the realisation that he was here with me now. So, I nodded without looking at him, simply waiting for him to step away and finally give me that space I felt desperate for. It was as though I couldn’t breathe. As if I had forgotten the process or something.
But then he grasped my chin and turned my face back to his, giving me little option than to do as he wanted. However, despite his dominant grip, his eyes softened in a way I used to love.
“Don’t shut me out,” he whispered gently and this time I couldn’t help but close my eyes, needing to rid myself of the sight of what was happening. Then finally I could breathe again when I felt him stepping away, cursing under his breath in a language I didn’t know. That was when I finally opened my eyes and turned my back on him. Finding myself once more holding onto the table top and grasping at the papers there, as if the feel of the pages beneath my fingers would help take me back to what had once been my reality. The one I had built up without Lucius.
Not here. Not back here in this dream world that I had been stumbling blindly through the whole time Lucius had pretended to want me. Back to the place he seemed to want to force me back to. Which made me hiss,
“Why?”
“You know why, you are just too blinded by what you think you saw to see the truth behind the veil of pain,” he told me making a breath get stuck in my throat on a gasp.
“I won’t go back there...I won’t go back to Afterlife. You can’t make me,” I told him, turning back around to tell him the last part of this vow, which was when he surprised me.
“I have no intention of trying to force you to,” he told me with a fold of his arms across that wide chest of his. Gods be damned, but why did he have to look even better than I remembered. In fact, my memories hadn’t done his image justice and even then, he had been the one to feature in every one of my fantasies. Also, I had never seen him dressed in anything other than a suit or jeans and a t shirt. But right now, he was dressed for summer and I hated to say it, but Gods, he looked hot and that had nothing to do with the temperature.
He wore a worn denim shirt open and rolled at the sleeves with a white t-shirt underneath. He had dark grey cargo shorts that reached his knees and had multiple pockets, that looked to have a pair of aviator sunglasses hooked in one. I knew that most likely a phone and wallet would be in the others. A pair of black sandals that looked like the kind wore for hiking and a black glove that looked like strapping you would have on for a boxing match, completed the look. Who knew that Lucius had a glove for every season, I thought with a concealed snigger.
But it made me wonder what he thought when seeing me now after all this time. My denim shorts, striped red and white vest top and white sneakers weren’t exactly anything to write home about.
Besides, my mind was kind of stuck on the part when he said that he had no intention of forcing me to go back to Afterlife.
What the Hell?
I turned back to the table and started to pile up the books just for something to do other than look at him...it was too painful, knowing that perfection wasn’t mine anymore. I wasn’t free to touch it, to own it and drink it in wherever I wanted to. I swallowed down the hard lump of my reality and tried to get my hands to stop shaking.
“If that is true, then I still fail to see what it is you’re doing here,” I said trying to keep my tone steady, which helped without looking at him. But when he started laughing, I shot him a dumbfounded look over my shoulder.
“Seriously?” he asked, making me frown in answer.
“You just slapped me, kissed me and then I kissed you back, only better... and you’re asking me what it is I am doing here?” he said making me slam a book down and snap,
“Your kiss wasn’t better!” At this he folded his arms over his chest making the denim at his arms tighten around the biceps in that delicious way that made it really, really hard not to look at.
“It was,” he stated condescendingly.
“Gods, you’re so arrogant! No, it wasn’t!” I told him making him smirk in that cocky way before he leant his body forward at the waist slightly so he could tell me,
“Yeah... it fucking was.” I shook my head and rolled my eyes at him making his own widen before a full-on grin arose, making me hold up a finger and snap,
“Oh no, don’t you even fucking think of it!” Of course this was referring to his spanking rule as punishment for what he deemed a ‘disrespectful gesture’.
“Trust me, sweetheart, since you ran from me, then I can assure you that I have thought of little else but doing it and it has not one fucking thing to do with you rolling your eyes at me.” At this my mouth dropped open in surprise and he nodded to my face and said,
“Actually, you can include that expression on the list as well.” At this I snapped my mouth shut and narrowed my eyes at him.
“You’re unbelievable!” I snapped making him tell me in a firm and pissed off tone,
“No, what is unbelievable is that you made it this far and this long alone...I have to say, you broke all records with that one, Princess.”
“Oh, I was waiting for how long it would be before you went back to calling me Princess,” I threw back at him.
“I believe I used the term Khuba and sweetheart first, or didn’t you notice and was too busy waiting for one that suits your pissed off mood?” Grrr I hated it when the asshole made a point!
“Ahhh, Gods, you’re intolerable!” I snapped with a throw of my arms making him nod my way and tell me,
“Yes, and for these last two months, then the feeling is mutual, although I would have chosen impossible, stubborn, reckless, obstinate, and tenacious...oh, and of course, infuckingsane! But hey, you go ahead and pick one,” he snapped making me reply in a mocking tone,
“Oh right, just because I chose to leave you, eh...? Because that could never happen to the mighty Lucius without being insane...clearly.”
“Ahh, so you picked one...good choice, as it was the one I was leaning heavily towards myself.” I growled at him and turned back to the table and then spun around, opened my mouth to say something that never came. Damn it, but it left me at just the sight of him raising a brow in question before I huffed and turned back to the table again now looking like an idiot.
Then I took a deep breath, found my words, and turned to face him one last time.
“And she’s back again,” he muttered the moment I knew what I wanted to say, ignoring his sarcasm, and telling him,
“I was insane for...” suddenly I was stopped dead, losing my train of thought and the ability to speak when a hand covered my mouth and he was inches from me.
“I am going to stop you there, Princess, before the humour of this moment runs dry and the memory of your kiss is replaced by the bitter bite of your tongue lashed my way,” he warned making me look up at him with wide eyes before I mumbled against his hand,
“I thout you sid your kiss wass bett...er?” At this he grinned down at me and, keeping his hand in place, he leaned closer and whispered,
“It was but yours was a good contender for first.” I swallowed hard and his eyes flashed a shade of amber at the sight. Gods, but I had missed that sight, so much so that it made my chest ache. I would see it sometimes in my dreams. Those eyes watching me through the darkness, as if watching over me, guiding me to the safety away from my nightmares.
“But then, it is unsurprising, seeing as you are out of practice,” he told me in a playful tone that made me growl behind his palm before I gripped onto his wrist and bit into the soft fleshy part near his thumb. However, this didn’t exactly have the desired effect, as he just grinned down at me, before taunting me,
“Harder, sweetheart, for it tickles.” I growled and yanked it down with a hard tug forcing him to release me. Then I snapped,
“Oh, but I don’t want another mental image of you ‘practicing’ thanks.” At this his playful humour was gone in an instant and darkness took over it before he got closer to my face and snarled,
“Reel in your claws and tone down the bitch act princess, for it doesn’t fucking suit you!”
“Oh my Gods, you utter asshole!” I shouted pushing on his chest, happy that he stepped back so I could escape his hold.
“I can’t believe all this time I have been spending it miss...I mean thanking that I...uh...left.” I trailed off my sentence not knowing what to say to cover up the mistake I’d made, as I knew he heard it when he shot me a look of shock before his angry features softened. I turned my back to him and started to walk away when he grabbed my hand and tugged me back to him.
“Spending it?” he asked, making me clear my throat first before answering,
“I just told you.”
“No, what you just told me was a lie to cover up the truth,” he argued, making me swallow down about half of the things I really wanted to say to that. And he knew it. As he raised a hand before it turned into a fist and fell. Then he closed his eyes for the seconds it took him to say in a strained tone,
“Don’t say it, Amelia, don’t you dare say it.” I turned away from him and walked back to the table to grab my canvas book bag. Then I started stuffing the books I needed back inside it, as I told him,
“Consider this as me dared not to say anything else but, bye Lucius.” Then I folded the flap over the opening and hooked the strap across my chest before grabbing the lightweight jacket I’d brought because it was chillier in the mornings.
Then I started to walk away, not exactly getting far without him. This was because Lucius grabbed my hand in his and no matter how much I tried to get out of his grip, I couldn’t. Then he looked down at me and informed me,
“Like I said, you can have your time, but it is going to be spent by my side...”
“Now and forever.”