In this chapter we will explore modern techniques available to ensure your minions, lackeys and spawnlings carry out your orders without question. Even when those orders could have terrible consequences to their health, hygiene or personal karma. Some of the popular control systems are discussed below:
8.1 Troding is a simple and cheap process with a strong and proud military history. Essentially it’s a digital receiver linked to an electronic device, which is plugged into the nervous system of a soldier. Once a trode system has been implanted, the subject is left with two choices: execute your orders immediately or be punished by the system. The punishment can vary from a mild electrical spanking, to an excruciating death, depending on the transgression. Each troded unit needs to be monitored and controlled by an administrator, these can be computerized but, more often than not, are females sitting at base camp watching and issuing orders to their troded subjects.
Risks to consider: If the enemy cracks the trode system’s encryption, they will be able to use your own forces against you or simply kill them all. You should always use a nine digit password at least. Don’t use simple things like “password,” “God,” “sex” or your mother’s name. Try to use special characters and jump between upper and lower case letters and you should be fine.
8.2 Rigorous traditional training. In the days of the great depression in America, there used to be travelling circuses which would parade exotic animals for the amusement of the local citizenry. In dealing with elephants, the keepers learned that if you rammed a peg deep into the ground and tethered a baby elephant to it, it would struggle for a few hours and then give up. Once the elephant had realized it wasn’t strong enough to break free, it stopped trying and never tried again. So a few years later, fully grown elephants could be tethered to pegs the size of pencils and they wouldn’t even attempt escaping. This is similar to how training in any modern military works. The tether is the old, aggressive drill sergeant who hates life and everything in it, the peg is the vindictive and petty nature of military law. The elephant is the soldier. The pain and fear of basic training should be so intense that it changes the mental state of the conscript into an obedient lackey, capable of murder at the drop of a hat.
Risks to consider: If released from military life, a small percentage will climb bell towers or office blocks with high powered rifles, to recapture better times now lost to them.
8.3 Hoorah is a psychological series of soft mental programming techniques to convince elite forces they don’t mind death, love killing and are exquisitely badass. It starts with marketing the special force as being the most lethal of all forces everywhere, then offering extremely difficult training with a cull-rate of at least 80 percent. Their hand to hand combat and weaponry should be shrouded in mystery. Then, when war breaks out, they should be the first units in and placed in the most dangerous positions possible. Do this to them and they will happily risk their lives daily and without question.
Risks to consider: If a severe defeat is suffered at the hands of the enemy, their morale can easily be shaken. If that’s the case they will begin to question orders and can be quite grumpy with their specialized skill set and lack of purpose for living. I recommend using plants in this situation to stabilize and remoralize the unit.
8.4 Zealots. In chapter seven, we discussed the benefits and pitfalls of some modern faiths, and all of these can be brought to bear here. While I recommend conscription for filling your daily dying duties, if you have a strong church established in your nation, take advantage of it. Zealots are those citizen who bought into the faith, hook, line and sinker. They should always be cherished, for these Kool aiders will generally hold the faith till the end of days and beyond. Establish religious orders, allow the churches to select dedicated, pious and holy men and build their own legions. Continue to push the tenants of the faith, perhaps offering them insight into secret texts of your own making, when established, use these troops with impunity as their faith in God will be the same as theirs in you. On Earth we have seen this sort of recruit in the crusades, during the Boer War and more recently, with Isis.
Risks to consider: Similar to the Hoorah method, if zealots ever experience a massive defeat it can cripple their faith. The good news is they probably won’t turn against their deity, but rather against you. They often begin to think of you as not being the true emissary of God, but instead some sort of devil or anti-deity. Which can be very hurtful. When this feeling emerges, it is normally accompanied by a desire to kill you, painfully. Unfortunately, plants don’t tend to work in zealot armies as AI is not advanced enough to pass as one of them. Their blind faith and reasoning just isn’t rational by any definition of the word and AI’s seem quite incapable of faking faithfulness.
8.5 Plants are the modern equivalent of decoy ducks for people. These robotic units are built to look like biologicals and as far as your troops know, they are simply good-looking, skillful and courageous soldiers. Behind the scenes though, they are plants, robots embedded into the ranks to act as natural leaders and friends to be trusted. They can perform a critical role in keeping morale high, even while your army is suffering a defeat. They will also help to identify who is speaking out against the regime, so that they can be eliminated, but their primary goal is to be admired by other enlisted men and to lead the charge over the top in any combat situation.
Risks to consider: If other units ever see the plant’s body twisting and sparking with electrodes and its metal skeleton exposed, it’ll quickly become clear that ‘Joe’ wasn’t one of them and the illusion will be destroyed. For this reason, plants need to be well armored, to withstand small-arms fire at the very least. Combatants who do see plants for what they are should be executed before the rumors can circulate.
8.6 The natural state. If insufficient time has been spent on training and brainwashing, the natural mentality of infantry units is this: When the fear of the enemy outweighs the fear of your own commanders, you will have dissent and mutiny. When the reverse is true, you will have bravery. For this reason, your officers need to be better armed and more vigilant than the grunts they command, so the natural state works in your favor.
Risks to consider: If your officers ever lose the upper hand, your troops will turn on you. In some situations, officers do not enjoy killing their own and have been known to join forces with the regulars. For this reason, soldiers and officers should always come from different backgrounds. Rich and noble officers will have no problem shooting plebs.
8.7 Crude mechanics. There’s plenty of times I’ve been mocked for employing mad scientists and crackpot inventors. I’ve also invaded over one hundred and thirty planets and removed two dozen species from the universe. My fleets have stretched across four galaxies and my employees counted in the hundreds of millions. Crude mechanical mind-control techniques have helped to make this possible. I have learned that brains are mechanical devices open to manipulation by surprisingly simple means. You might think that your mind is an intricate and wondrous device which holds all your unique thoughts and wisdom. It isn’t. You are a product of genetics and environment. You do not have a soul, that’s a simple illusion created by superstitious types to help you sleep at night. Human brains can be influenced by chemicals with predicable outcomes. Magnets placed at the base of your skull will reduce your ability to determine right from wrong, and there are a myriad surgeries for adjusting behavior, beside the one you know about: lobotomy. Lobotomies may have a bad reputation today but there was a time when it was a very popular control method. The Kennedy’s went so far as to even use it on their own family members. Employ scientists with degrees and hobbyists alike, those who like to dabble on the fringes should be brought in and funded if they show promise.
Risks to consider: Try to use the smaller, weaker conscripts for testing purposes. Insist on a small test group to begin with, the last thing you want is to have half your army modified when you discover the first glitch in the system. Also, drooling can be an unfortunate side effect.
8.8 Psychology adds to science in the same way Tolkien contributed to medieval history. It doesn’t. But it does have some rudimentary techniques which have been proven to work effectively. While I don’t recommend having your troopers engage in weekly sessions with bearded sensitive types, their input into training and brainwashing techniques has proven extremely insightful.
Risks to consider: If not watched closely, psychological programs will have your fighters talking about their mothers to each other, crying onto the shoulders of officers or sitting in the head with loaded rifles, practicing parade drills prior to shooting themselves and their commanding officers. Psychologists try to turn people into well-rounded and stable individuals. An interesting fact about well-rounded and stable individuals is, they are less likely to run screaming in a murderous rage towards large groups of enemy soldiers, just because you asked them to. This is also why soldiers and warmongers are more often than not male.