If you’re feeling overwhelmed by your fear, just remember: all good stories come with a little conflict. Just think of your favorite movie—what kinds of trials and challenges did the hero have to overcome in order to make it to the happy ending? If you’re struggling, high five! It means you’re actually taking steps to clear your path, climb that mountain, and conquer your vision. Nobody ever said it was going to be easy, and besides, what fun would it be if it was? On the other side of your fear is everything you want and more.
Trust. Trust that you’re smart. Trust that you’re going to figure it out.
—DANIELLE KRYSA, BEING BOSS, EPISODE 98
Our friend and creative comrade Danielle Krysa started a blog in 2009 called The Jealous Curator—it was a place where she documented the contemporary art that made her, well, jealous. What started out as a place to hash out her feelings of envy has bloomed into a magical brand that has enabled Danielle to write multiple books, become a sought-after speaker, and—best of all—rekindle her own creative fire.
BEING BOSS: When have you felt like you failed, and how did you respond at the time?
DANIELLE KRYSA: I have failed plenty of times, but I don’t really think of them as failures—those experiences are just bumps along my path. Granted, sometimes those bumps leave pretty big bruises! One of the toughest experiences in my creative life happened only a few weeks before I finished my bachelor of fine arts degree. I was a painting major, but I really did not fit in at that school. I was used to defending myself in front of my painting professor and classmates, which, at the end of the day, is a pretty good skill to have. However, six weeks before graduation I showed my class the work for my final show. My teacher, who normally didn’t like my work, loved these paintings! I was so excited—so excited, in fact, that when he asked for volunteers to show their work the following week in front of a visiting artist from New York, I put my hand up. How is this a failure, you ask? Wait for it… one week later I hung the same paintings I’d shown the Thursday before, but this time things didn’t go so well. What was meant to be a ten-minute critique ended up lasting for thirty minutes, and in a strange twist, my professor and peers completely tore my work apart. I was stunned and suddenly my capability of defending myself was out the window. Close to the end of those thirty minutes my painting professor said, and I quote, “You should never paint again.” Yes, that was a pretty big bruise.
BB: What was waiting for you on the other side of that failure?
DK: I allowed that experience to affect me much longer than it should have. I tried to keep painting for about a year after that, but I second-guessed every idea and every paint stroke. Eventually, I just quit. That, to me, was failure. However, if it weren’t for that critique, and the years that followed, I never would have found my way to where I am now. I wouldn’t have been motivated to start my art blog, The Jealous Curator. I wouldn’t have written books about creative blocks and inner critics being big jerks! I have a podcast, teach workshops, and speak all over the world. Why? Because I don’t want anyone else to feel as alone as I did for all of those years. The only way you can truly fail is to quit. Don’t quit.
BB: It’s easy to see in hindsight how everything works out for a reason, but what advice would you give to someone who is caught in the grips of a creative block or their own inner critic?
DK: I think the most important thing to realize (and I wish I’d known this years ago) is that every creative person deals with blocks and self-doubt. Every. Creative. Person. Yes, even those people you idolize, who seem to have it all figured out. As soon as I realized I wasn’t alone, that I was in fact experiencing the same thing as these people I admired so much, I was able to take a deep breath and cut myself some slack. I was suddenly in the same cool, creative club with these greats! Not a bad place to be, right? There is only one way for both blocks and inner critics to win—if you quit. By simply pushing forward, even on days when your pursuits feel like they’re going nowhere, you are winning the battle.
After that terrible critique at the end of my BFA, I didn’t push forward. I hid out. I didn’t make my own work for years, probably because I was terrified of making something that wasn’t perfect—so I just made nothing. Well, that was ridiculous. I’ve finally, and thankfully, come to understand that I can be creative every day without having to be a creative genius every day! The important thing is doing something that moves your creative life forward—that might be hitting the art store to keep your studio stocked, visiting an art opening with friends from your creative tribe so that all of you get a hit of inspiration (and free wine), or even puttering in your studio preparing bits and pieces for the next time inspiration strikes. Creativity is a lot like exercise—the more you do it, the better you feel, and suddenly you’re living the life you want to be living.
Danielle Krysa has a BFA in fine arts and a postgraduate degree in graphic design. She is the writer and curator behind the contemporary online art site The Jealous Curator (thejealouscurator.com). Danielle has hung shows in Washington, D.C., Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Toronto. In 2014 she published two books titled Creative Block and Collage. Her third book, Your Inner Critic Is a Big Jerk was released in fall 2016. Danielle has also had the great pleasure of speaking at TEDx, Pixar, Creative Mornings, CreativeLive, and Altitude Summit, and was interviewed for several video segments on Oprah.com.