EMILY’S BUCKET LIST
• BACKPACK THROUGH EUROPE
• WRITE A COCKTAIL BOOK
• HAVE A TINY HOUSE (OR GLASS MANSION) IN THE WOODS
• ADOPT A REDWOOD GROVE
• LEARN HOW TO LIGHT CANDLES WITH THE SNAP OF A FINGER!
• SEE THIS BOOK YOU’RE READING ON THE SHELF AT AN AIRPORT
• LIVE ON THE EAST COAST OF AUSTRALIA FOR THREE MONTHS
• ATTEND MAKEUP SCHOOL IN NYC OR PARIS
• LEARN THE CHOREOGRAPHY TO A HIT BEYONCÉ SONG
• HAVE A FAMILY PORTRAIT TAKEN OF OUR AURAS
It all fell into place with remarkable ease. But the trip itself pushed me in ways that I never imagined.
This adventure tested parts of my primal programming I’ve never encountered before, especially providing basic needs for my family (i.e., where we’d eat our next meal or where we’d hang our hat for the night). This adventure was the epitome of a life hustle. In forty days we drove 10,000 miles, visited twenty-two states, toured dozens of our national treasures, hiked, cooked over a fire, and slept on the ground. We showered once a week, carried only as much food as would fit in a small cooler, and rarely knew where we would sleep until about an hour before we arrived at our campsite for the night. Long-term camping is hard enough, but setting up and taking down camp every day is its own kind of grueling work. Going extended periods of time without all the things that make life easier is something I had never experienced before. Not to mention I spent forty days hovering over toilets that were little more than holes in the ground with little shacks built on top of them. I became a master of the chair pose, and I can go from gear-explosion to ready-to-hit-the-road in less than an hour.
We adjusted our mindset, set up boundaries, and adopted new habits and routines throughout the entire trip. It was the realization of a goal we’d held for years, and reaching the end of it intact was a goal we maintained throughout the entire trip. We worked hard for both of those goals, and it changed our ability to hustle forever, in life and in work. I knew it would change how I worked with people and how I held myself accountable to get shit done. When #indiegoeswest was complete, we were all different people. That life hustle made me more boss than any work hustle ever could, and rewarded me in ways that my business never will.
HOW TO SET UP YOUR BUSINESS TO TAKE TIME OFF FOR YOUR LIFE HUSTLE
Whether you’re planning an epic vacation, a honeymoon, or even maternity leave, you can put processes in place to keep your business running smoothly in your absence:
Create and schedule content in advance: If you are regularly blogging, podcasting, or sending out emails to your newsletter list, be sure to write or record material in advance and schedule it to post while you’re gone.
Set up auto-responders to your email: Let people who are trying to reach you know where you’re going (you can make it fun and personable!) and when you plan to be back.
Wrap up projects, orders, and to-dos: You might be busting ass to get it all done before you head out, but you’ll leave with the peace of mind that you’ll be coming home to a clean slate.
Budget accordingly: If you’re taking a week, a month, or even a good portion of your year off, be sure to plan for that pause in income.
Let your clients or customers know you’ll be on hiatus: If you’re a one-person shop, you’ll especially want to let recurring customers or retainer clients know that you’ll be unavailable.
Staff up: One of the best things about having employees is that someone is there to hold down the fort while you’re out.
BEING BOSS WITH KIDS
Living a life you love can include some grand adventures—from hiking the Himalayas to taking an epic road trip, but we don’t want to paint a picture of a life hustle that is just about the big adventures that make a great story. Sometimes the most challenging and rewarding life moments happen in the daily grind—especially with the endurance it takes to be a parent.
There’s a lot of guilt that naturally shows up when you’re trying to balance being present as a parent with focusing on your career—but growing a business and growing a family don’t have to be mutually exclusive. In our experience, being parents has helped us, in many ways, become better bosses. On the flip side, the lessons we’ve learned in business, from setting boundaries to establishing productive habits and routines for managing time, have directly contributed to how we’re able to balance the responsibilities that come with being parents. There are a lot of parallels between raising a kiddo and building a business:
You have to be adaptable: One of the fastest lessons you’ll learn in business and parenthood alike is that not everything always goes as planned. You might daydream about working from home with a baby playing with wooden toys in a crisp white onesie. Any parent knows firsthand that the onesie will not stay crisp and white. There are lots of parents who can finesse the work-from-home situation (kudos to you), but you might find that it’s really hard to be a parent and be a boss at the same time. You have to adapt your dreamy visions and be able to pivot when things change, in both work and life, according to your actual circumstances.
You may feel nothing will ever be enough: When business is personal, you’ll find yourself feeling that you could always be doing more and better. The same is true with kids. But you can’t be too precious or protective with either one. Your business, like your child, in many ways has a life of its own. You can’t control every little aspect, and where would the fun be in that anyway?
Multitasking is a joke: In work you’ll quickly learn that without focus, balls will be dropped, deadlines will be missed, and important emails will fall through the cracks. The same is true at home—if you’re trying to cook dinner while catching up on said emails and running a bath at the same time, something is going to get burnt (or flooded).
It’s not always fun: The part about being a parent and working for yourself that everyone is always too ashamed to admit is that it’s not always fun. We glamorize both parenting and entrepreneurship with curated Instagram feeds and Pinterest-perfect snapshots, but in reality, building a business and growing a family is complex and far more messy than we let on.
All that said, what those curated Instagram snaps fail to capture are the nuances and depth of experience that our life and work hustle gives us. It’s not always fun, nor should it be! The tenacity, grit, and endurance that come with hustling out some life—from the daily grind to the daring adventures—are what make us so damn boss.
And finally, if you need a reminder that you’re doing a great job (most parents and entrepreneurs do), consider this your pep talk.
WHERE’S YOUR KID WHILE YOU WORK?
Child care is one of the biggest issues that parents have to face, whether they work for someone else or for themselves. And being an entrepreneur doesn’t actually make this decision any easier. In fact, it probably makes it harder, because you do have the option of keeping your kid with you while you work, whereas that’s much less likely if you have a day job.
Emily here. In my years of working for myself as a mom, I’ve tried out every single child care option for my daughter, except boarding school. (We’re still waiting on her Hogwarts letter, so even that’s not ruled out yet.) Early in her life, grandparents played a large role in keeping her safe and fed when I needed to get work done. At two different times I’ve had a nanny of sorts come into my home multiple times a week to entertain her while I tackled my task list in another room. When she was ready for pre-K, she attended part-time. For kindergarten, she went to school like all the other kids. Now, we homeschool; David handles our daughter’s education and is the primary caregiver while I’m writing, recording, and coaching.
Every phase of our care for our daughter has been a product of our lifestyle and—honestly—what we could afford. Depending on where we lived, what resources were available, our own work demands, and her age and needs, our requirements for taking care of our kid have shifted. When needs changed, so did our arrangements. We make the best decision we can with the options that we have, and it’s your job to do the same. Feeling guilty about any decision, no matter what it may be, is a waste of energy as long as your decisions are fully considered with all the boss foundations in place: what’s most important to you, what rules will support that, and how can you adjust your daily routine to make sure it all works?
You must tackle parenthood the same way you tackle living and working like a boss. Don’t live by anyone else’s standards; do what is right for you and your family. Know what you want to get out of your family life, and make the decisions and take the actions that will help you reach your goals. Set expectations, but stay open to allow things to bloom in ways that you couldn’t even imagine. Enjoy what you have, and do the work.
TREAT YO’SELF!
Self-care is getting a lot of buzz these days. It should be obvious that we need to take care of the number one asset in our work and life (ourselves!). However, there are still far too many people who wear their eighty-hour work weeks and sleep deprivation like a badge of honor. Not cool. So we don’t mind if self-care is a trend and we all bring a little more attention to treating our bodies, minds, relationships, and spirits like the bosses we are. Plus, a regular self-care practice will help you cope with the stress and challenges that inevitably come with running a business while having a life.
Self-care can be integrated into your morning and nightly routine, but it’s also about truly treating yourself to some indulgences you deserve. Be sure to schedule weekly or monthly self-care appointments, and treat them like any other important meeting! And don’t let the cost of self-care be an excuse not to treat yourself. We love splurging when we can, but there are lots of inexpensive and totally free ways to indulge yourself, too:
• Hug someone you love—it will boost those feel-good hormones.
• Book a vacation and leave your laptop at home.
• Take yourself on a date to the museum.
• Get a new plant to put in your garden.
• Upgrade to first class on that flight.
• Get a massage.
• Invest in a monthly subscription box of goodies (like clothes, food, or beauty products).
• Get it on with yourself (or someone you love).
• Read a magazine while drinking your favorite beverage.
• Buy yourself fresh flowers.
• Get a mani-pedi.
• Enjoy a face mask.
• Put your bare feet in some grass and maybe hug a tree.
How would you treat yourself?
MAKING FRIENDS AS A GROWN-UP
It’s been said that we are the sum of the five people we hang out with most. Whether or not that’s true, it’s really important that you surround yourself with people who are going to challenge you to be and support you in being your best self.
Write down the five people you hang out with the most:
1. 
2.
3.
4.
5.
What do they value? What’s their disposition? What are they really talented at? Where do they struggle? Now it’s time to get really honest with yourself. Are you hanging out with the kind of people who support and inspire you? Or are your friends lowering your vibes? What do you bring to the relationships you have? Are you being the kind of friend you’d like to be?
That’s a lot of questions. You might be saying, “Okay. I need to fill my life with more high-vibing creatives!” and after that, you might be asking, “But where do I find them!?” Good question. It’s not always easy to make friends as a grown-ass adult, but we’ve got a few ideas for you:
• Join a club! There are a lot of professional associations in every industry where you can meet like-minded creatives.
• Take a class. Local workshops, remote retreats, and even small conferences where you’re learning something new or honing your craft with other people offer great opportunities to find your tribe.
• Invite someone you admire to coffee. Okay, this one might feel a little bold, but you might already have an acquaintance who would make for a great friend. Muster up your courage and invite them on a coffee or dinner date.
• Get out of your house. You’re never going to meet new people if you’re holed up in your home office. You might have to leave your comfort zone to make new friends, whether that means sitting on your front porch and engaging with your neighbors or joining a co-working space.
• Make friends online. Some of our closest relationships started by commenting on someone’s blog or Instagram post—the trick here is you can’t just be a lurker. You have to engage in conversations with people you like.
New relationships can begin from the smallest spark and grow into lifelong friendships. From meeting new people to sustaining long-term relationships, making and keeping friends is a habit you have to practice and nurture. Set up a regular reminder to text, call, or email the people who are important to you. Invite people you want to spend more time with to a monthly meetup or weekly dinner party. Stay connected with people who are meaningful to you, and they will bring more meaning and fulfillment to your life.