A monster stood on the path in front of Rose. It had the body of a fox, the talons of an owl and a huge snakelike head with three big goggling eyes surmounted above rows of fearsome teeth. Dashing madly along to where the dreadful screams were issuing from, the mousemaid tried to stop at the sight of the horrendous apparition. Grumm and Pallum cannoned into her back, sending her staggering straight into the arms of the nightmare beast. She screamed aloud in terror as she blundered into its embrace.
Then it collapsed on the path in a dusty heap. Straw, grass, bark, dead ferns and feathers swirled everywhere.
Rose sneezed, spitting out a mouthful of downy fur as Pallum and Grumm came gingerly forward to help her up.
“Burr, wot be et?”
“Huh, Mirdop, it’s nothing but a great big doll hanging from the trees by bits of creeper!”
Rose dusted herself down, looking around wildly. “Where’s Martin?”
The horrendous screams had stopped. To one side of the path Martin sat upon a great hollow log, chuckling quietly. “Bravo, Rose. You’ve just slain your first Mirdop!”
The mousemaid looked flustered. “But how . . . and you . . . those screams . . . ?”
“Come over here and I’ll show you.”
Martin bent beside the hollow log and called aloud, “Go back, for I am the Mirdop and I will slay you!”
The sound thundered and reverberated around the forest, magnified by the hollow ash log.
Grumm uncovered his ears when the noise faded.
“But oo wurr a-doen all ’ee shouten?”
Martin took them around the other side of the big log to where four rabbits, obviously mother, father and two young, were lying slumped.
“Oh dear, you haven’t killed them, Martin?” Rose gasped.
The young mouse shook his head and smiled. “Of course not. I couldn’t harm creatures like these. I sneaked up and saw what they were doing, so I thought I’d take a leaf out of your book, Rose.”
The mousemaid looked mystified, then Martin explained. “Remember, the warrior who uses the voice instead of the sword? Well, I crept up behind them and started yelling as loud and horrible as I could. Of course, being new at this sort of thing, I suppose I underestimated the power of my cries. The rabbits seemed to freeze then fainted right away!”
Rose hurried to the side of the two babes. She stroked them tenderly until they began whimpering and moving. “Poor little things. You great bully, Martin. Fancy doing an awful thing like that!”
Grumm and Pallum had to hide their faces to stop bursting out laughing at the sight of Martin, paws outstretched in bewilderment.
“I didn’t hurt them. What was I supposed to do, set about them with my sword, or ask them nicely to please stop terrorizing travellers? You’re the one who went and destroyed their Mirdop. Bully yourself!”
Rose fussed about, wetting the older rabbits’ mouths with water until they revived. Instantly they drew back in horror.
“Aagh! Go away, you savage creatures. Which one is Grumm the Growler, and who is Pallum the Mighty and Rose the Slayer?”
Grumm tugged his snout respectfully at the female rabbit.
“Hurr ’tis oi, marm. But oi doant mean ’ee no ’arm.”
Martin took a slightly stronger line with them. “Er, just a moment, please. I think it’s we should be asking the questions. What d’you mean by shouting threats and trying to intimidate travellers on this path?”
The father rabbit held a shaky paw to his brow. “Please, not so loud, we’re really delicate creatures, you know. Allow me to introduce us. I’m Fescue, this is my wife Mildwort and these are the twins Burnet and Buttercup. Mirdop’s the family name, hence the, er, figure we have to keep away intruders.”
“Oh yes, it was Fescue’s great Grandpa who built it,” his wife interrupted. “One never knows what horrid types of beast want to wander abroad on our path. Please don’t harm us, we were only protecting ourselves.”
Rose sat by Mildwort Mirdop and spoke soothingly. “We wouldn’t dream of harming a nice little family like yours. I’m sorry we frightened you, but we were rather scared ourselves with all that threatening and roaring you were doing.”
Fescue laughed nervously. “Er yes, haha, rather good, wasn’t it? By the way, have you had tea yet?”
Grumm’s stomach made a small gurgle as he rubbed it. “Us’ns be allus ready furr vittles, zurr. Do you’m ’ave zoop?”
Mildwort stared down her snub nose at the mole. “Hardly. Soup is not good for one at this time of day. Follow me, please.”
They followed the Mirdop family down into their burrow. It was large, comfortable and spotless. Behind their backs, Pallum made a snooty gesture with paw to nose, and Grumm nodded in agreement.
Tea was a very formal affair in the Mirdop burrow. First the guests were given lavender-scented soap, warm water and soft barktowels to wash and dry their paws. The two young rabbits were sent back several times until their parents were satisfied that their paws were cleaned properly, then they all sat down at a small table.
Mildwort Mirdop brought a large pot of steaming mint tea with honey to go in it, a platter of wafer-thin cucumber sandwiches and seven tiny oat scones, each lightly spread with raspberry preserve. She seated herself, and in the silence that followed murmured quietly to her husband; “The grace before tea, dear.”
Fescue coughed gently to clear his throat. They all stared down at the spotless tablecloth while he repeated the grace.
“For all we receive for tea,
Thanks to the seasons be.
Partake we sparingly
Of this good meal.”
As they each chose a cucumber sandwich, Mildwort scolded Burnet. “Sandwiches first, scones later. Put it back please.”
Baby Burnet scowled slightly. “Scones are my fav’rite.”
Fescue tweaked his ear lightly. “Baby bunnies should be seen and not heard, Burnet. Don’t talk back to your mother. How many times must we tell you!”
The meal was eaten rather quickly in polite frosty silence. Grumm made a sucking noise as he drained his teacup and sat back. “Hurr, they’m noice scones, marm. Oi’m partial to a noice scone.”
Mildwort sniffed. “So are we, Mr. Grumm. There are more in the cupboard for tomorrow.”
Fescue smiled nervously as he nodded agreement. “Indeed there are, dear. No sense in overstuffing with food. Er, you say you are bound for Noonvale. I’ve no idea where the place is. We’ve always lived by our path, never moved away. I’m afraid I can’t give you any directions, but I’m sure that from here you’ll have to cross the west marshes. My advice to you is watch out for lizards. Nasty things—cannibals, I might add!”
Baby Burnet nodded and agreed with his father. “Cabbinals!”
“Burnet!” Fescue looked severely at him. “Do not interrupt your elders and betters. You are excused from the table. You too, Buttercup. Don’t stray far from the burrow and try to keep clean. Bedtime soon.”
Like two silent shadows, the little ones got down from their chairs, bobbed a curtsy and a bow to the guests and left the burrow with their mother’s voice ringing in their ears.
“Walk, don’t run. How many times must I tell you!”
As she cleared away the tea things from under the noses of the still hungry travellers, she said in a strained voice. “You are welcome to stay the night in our burrow.”
Rose kicked Grumm beneath the table as he searched for crumbs. “How nice of you, Mrs. Mirdop, but we wouldn’t dream of imposing upon your good nature. Besides, we have a long journey ahead of us and we must go while there is still daylight. Er, you mentioned cannibal lizards, Mr. Mirdop?”
Fescue Mirdop helped his wife to fold the tablecloth. “Oh yes, so I did. Right, here’s what you must do. At the edge of the forest the marshes begin. Find the place called Marshwood Hill. If the lizards trouble you, then strike the gong you will see hanging from a hornbeam tree. The Warden will take care of you. He’s such a nice creature, isn’t he, dear?”
Mildwort Mirdop nodded vigorously. “Oh yes, the Warden of Marshwood Hill, a very, very nice creature!” They took their leave of the Mirdops, thanking them for a pleasant stay. Mr. and Mrs. Mirdop waved before retreating back down their burrow. Grumm rummaged through their ration packs until he found some candied acorns and chestnuts. The two baby Mirdops were playing in front of the burrow, and he gave them a pawful each of the nuts.
“Yurr, babbies, eat’m oop noice’n messy loik. They’m guid’n sweet.”
Further along the path, Martin and Rose fell about laughing as Pallum imitated the hungry Grumm at tea, taking both the parts of the mole and Mrs. Mildwort Mirdop.
“Burr, oi’m pow’ful ’ungry, give oi a scone, missus!”
“No no, you nasty rough mole, one is quite sufficient!”
“Hurr, then give oi summ zoop, marm.”
“Soup? Lack a season, the ruffian will eat us out of house and burrow. Go away and be off with you, you gluttonous beast!”
Grumm drew his ladle and shook it at Pallum. “One moor wurd out of ’ee an’ oi’ll raise a bump on you’m spikers!”
* * *
Late that evening they reached the forest edge. Standing on a small rise, they looked down on the great West Marshes spreading as far as the eye could see. Grasshoppers chirruped in the short hillgrass and myriad swarms of flies and midges were everywhere.
Rose shooed a cloud away with a dead fern. “Whew! I’m not sleeping the night out here. Let’s go back and camp in the fringe of the trees. We can face this lot in the morning.”
They slumped down wearily beneath a sycamore and a beech. A slithering nearby caused Martin to jump up. Two long slowworms snaked away hissing noisily, disturbed from their rest. The creatures made no move to attack, but Martin stood with short sword drawn watching them slither down the side of the rise toward the marshes. Pallum began collecting dry firewood and digging a shallow pit.
“It’s all right, they’re only slowworms. Evil-looking reptiles, they do lots of hissing but they can’t really harm you. Right, Grumm, what’ll it be? Cucumber sandwiches or one scone apiece?”
The mole was busy digging out some mushrooms he had found. He looked up, shaking soil from his snout energetically. “Zoop, we’m ’aven zoop! Aye, an’ oi’ll make a pudden too, wi’ some apple an’ blackberries growen over yonder.”
* * *
Night fell warm and mild, with the small fire burning red as they sat around it, well fed and satisfied with their day’s progress.
“Tut tut, Mr. Grumm the Growler,” Rose teased Grumm. “If I were you I’d put half that pudding away for the morrow. You’ve eaten far too much already and it’s way past your bedtime!”
The mole looked up from a ladleful of pudding and snorted, “Oi should’ve left you’m be’oind wi’ they Mirkdops, mizzy. Teach you’m some manners, hurr!”
They watched a full moon move silently from behind pillowy night-cloud formations, it hung in the sky like a still, new-polished silver coin.
* * *
The two slowworms had returned. With them was a band of lizards twoscore strong. Their tongues slid silently in and out, filmy eyes blinking constantly against the dry warmth of the night. The two slowworms indicated where the sleeping travellers lay by thrusting their heads forward and hissing. The lizard leader, a great red-frilled reptile, nodded his head slowly as he watched the glow from the red embers of the fire dying lower. Soon the fire would be cold and the four travellers deep in sleep. The lizards waited patiently, watching their leader, waiting for him to move.