Perry Farrell might be the sweetest guy I have ever met. I mean it’s a weird thing to call a guy ‘sweet’ unless it is used as slang for ‘totally awesome’ but Perry Farrell was insanely ‘sweet’, as in ‘excruciatingly nice and considerate’. Don’t get me wrong, Perry Farrell (Jane’s Addiction, Porno for Pyros, Satellite Party) is ‘totally awesome’ too, but he takes the cake on sweetness. I can’t imagine the guy saying a bad word to anyone unless they really, really deserved it, and even then I can only imagine it said in a very mild mannered way. On top of that, he is extremely pleasant to be around, making even the highest strung person feel totally at ease around him. A class act for sure. In addition, his wife, Etty Farrell is exactly the same way, which makes them a great pair to hang out with. I have a few distinct memories about Perry and Etty that I would like to share in these wonderful memoirs I am putting together.

Both take place in the wonderful city of New Orleans, Louisiana. On the Justice Tour, which Tom Morello of Rage Against The Machine organized in 2008, we did a service project during the day in each city we went to and then played a show the next day. In New Orleans we did a service project with an organization called ‘Sweet Home New Orleans’ and worked to clean up the debris from Hurricane Katrina. At one particular house things got pretty gnarly. There was so much debris that we had to have 2 people ‘man’ the dumpsters. Wouldn’t you know that Perry Farrell would be one to volunteer. It was quite amazing to see a full-fledged rock star standing in a dumpster and sorting the gnarliest of debris with mold and rusty nails and insects galore. At one point Perry almost stepped on a crazy board with tons of rusty nails and his wife Etty almost made him get out of the dumpster. In a completely even keel and calm way Perry told her it would be fine and not to worry. Little did he know the true dangers that he avoided that day.

To point out a few examples, Carol Gronner, who was the writer on the tour, got bit by a poisonous spider on the ass and almost died. By the time she went to the hospital the tour was in Boston and the doctors told her that if she waited 12 more hours to get to the hospital then the bite would have been fatal. Imagine dying from a spider bite while doing community service?! Not cool. Chad, Chuck, and I got really bad cases of poison ivy. In fact, I had to go to the emergency room twice because my legs got so swollen after shows that I needed to get two separate types of medication (pills and cream). On top of that, Tom Morello actually got ants in his pants. No lie, a huge slew of fire ants raged into his pants and he freaked out, understandably, just like you would joke about having ‘ants in your pants’. So things got real down there. Wild stuff.

The same night as the infamous spider bite, ants in the pants, and poison ivy incidents we all went out to dinner in New Orleans. Tom Morello had eaten at the place we went to previously so he could vouch for the authenticity of the cuisine. And it was quite authentic and quite good. I ordered the catfish and was not disappointed. And it is pretty awesome to eat with famous people because when the bill was supposed to come to our table the owner of the restaurant came over instead and told us he appreciated us coming to his establishment and the meal was on the house. Awesome, but also a bummer, because I had been watching my alcohol and food intake because I didn’t want to rack up my portion of the bill! I was the black sheep of the group, actually being a semi-poor musician that lived with my mother for years (Thanks Mom!). Either way, the food and atmosphere was awesome and I was on a high just being at the same table as my rock idols, not to mention the fact that they were all extremely nice, and complimentary of State Radio, my drumming, and my girlfriend at the time. Which gets me back to Perry and Etty Farrell.

For a few years I was dating this Italian firecracker named Christine. She was a Jersey girl (from right outside New York City) and she wasn’t afraid to speak her mind, especially to me. She was definitely something special. I had often heard her described as a “bombshell”, and she was definitely the most attractive girl I had ever been involved with. So I tried to hang on to her as long as I could! But to no avail, we would break up later that same year of the Justice Tour and I was left with a broken heart for quite some time. But enough about that whiny stuff, let’s move on to where Perry and Etty fit in.

So we were sitting at dinner with all these rock stars and Perry takes the floor for a minute and says to Christine in his sweet innocent way, “You know Etty and I have been discussing this for the last few days and we both agreed that you look like someone famous. And we just figured it out that you look just like Demi Moore”. Christine, in her most modest way, dismissed the charge by saying she was flattered that they would even compare her to Demi. Talk amongst the table agreed that Christine resembled Demi and then Perry said, “Well, you look like a movie star!”, as Etty soon after chimed in, “Yeah, very beautiful!”. This was enough for me, I was flying high and I didn’t even get the compliment. Imagine one of your rock idols saying your lady has movie star looks. Not to mention his wife was quite beautiful herself, meaning he had pretty good taste. At that moment I kept thinking about how nice of a guy this Perry Farrell was, I mean complimenting my girl like that in front of everyone, and blowing up my head like that. I liked this guy’s style. He seemed so sincere too that I had to believe he wasn’t pulling my chain. I was as proud as a peacock. It was truly a pleasure being around the Farrells for the few days we were graced by their presence. I will forever be thankful for and fondly remember that night though, what a trip to hear Perry and Etty say that about Christine!