Susan left the wedding reception, walked through the building’s numerous hallways, and entered the main office. Earlier in the day, after helping the florist and taking care of other last-minute pre-wedding details, she had changed into dress clothes in her office. She would retrieve her things now along with Pugsy and go home.
Natalie was right. Much as Susan wanted to deny it, she had reached her limit. Again. It was becoming too familiar, this inability to handle life’s inevitable daily stress. Would she ever recover from the split caused by Kenzie’s news?
“Susan.”
She looked up to see Drake in his office doorway. He was so handsome in the deep gray suit that matched his eyes and hair. The festive ice blue tie complemented the bride’s colors. It had been Susan’s suggestion.
“Hi.” She went over to him, stopping within arm’s reach. “Beautiful ceremony, Pastor Drake.”
He smiled. “As always, you did a superb job behind the scenes.”
“Thanks.”
“You look tired.”
“I am. I’m going home.”
“I didn’t sleep well myself last night. Susan, I don’t like this being apart.”
“I don’t either.”
“I’m glad you’re home.”
It was time to tell him what was going on in her heart, what truly separated them. It wasn’t Kenzie’s news alone.
Maybe they could spend the remainder of the evening at home in front of the fire. The scene would be perfect for a long, heart-to-heart talk. Surely he ached for Kenzie as much as she did. Surely she could convince him that sending a message through the Carluccis was acceptable. Yes, they just needed time alone to reconnect.
“Are you coming now?” she asked.
“Not just yet. You go ahead, though. There are too many people wanting to bend my ear. They don’t get a setting like this too often, you know, to talk up close and personal.”
“Neither do I.” The words tripped off her tongue, murmuring what she normally would have kept to herself.
“What?” His snappish tone belied that he had indeed heard.
She cleared her throat and repeated it anyway. “I said, neither do I, meaning I don’t often get to talk up close and personal with you.”
“You’re the one who left for five days.”
She ignored that. “I need to talk with you, Drake. I need to do that soon.”
He placed his hands gently on her shoulders and kissed the top of her head. More often than not he followed up snappish tones with a soft touch. “It has been a rough couple months for both of us. I’ll be home by nine.”
“Mmm.” She pressed her lips together, but they wouldn’t stay put. Their Saturday night routine was too ingrained. “That’ll give you just enough time to review your sermon notes before bed.”
He removed his hands. “By eight then.”
Geez Louise. Was she special or what? He’d just scheduled an hour for her.
He walked to the main office doorway. “Get some rest.”
She was special. Worthy enough for more than an hour on a Saturday night.
She could not, she simply could not wait for eight o’clock. “I met with Aidan Carlucci’s mother.”
Drake whipped around on his heel. His jaw sagged. Literally.
She’d never seen that before.
“You did what? Why on earth would you…?” He went speechless.
She’d never seen that before either. “Because I had to find out how Kenzie is.”
“But we agreed—”
“I know we did. I apologize for breaking that agreement, but I could not handle it any longer. I had to find out what I could. So I met her at Starbucks in Fashion Valley and we talked.”
“We cannot communicate to that woman or Kenzie that we condone what our daughter is doing! Susan.” He spread his hands, a gestured plea to accept his words.
“I wasn’t communicating that I condone her actions. I was taking back my communication of condemnation.”
“You’re disrupting the process.”
“But it’s not like she was abusive to us, that we had to send her away because she was on drugs or something and hateful and destructive toward us. The least we can do is offer her comfort.”
“I know that would make you both feel better, but our God is the God of all comfort. He will comfort you and as soon as Kenzie turns back to Him, He will take care of her. If we interfere with His work, that can’t happen. You and I agreed that the best way to allow her to come to her senses was to let her feel the full impact of consequences.”
“Is withholding our love from her a consequence?”
“This is our love, Susan. This is the way God loves us, the way He draws us back to Himself by disciplining us when we need it.”
His words of God’s truth, spoken in that most compassionate tone, wore her down. She could not lift her eyes to meet his. Yes, God did discipline those He loved. Yes, she wanted Kenzie to—
Drake screens every jot and tittle of what you do…
What had Natalie said? Something about God saying You go, girl. You don’t need anyone else’s permission to do what you think is right. You’ve got Mine.
Drake hadn’t even asked about Kenzie’s welfare.
That wasn’t right.
It wasn’t.
She waited. She felt her chest heave. And she wondered, not for the first time, why she had brought Pugsy along to spend the long afternoon in her office…why she hadn’t yet bothered to unload her luggage from the car…why she thought—even before Natalie said anything—about the rental week technically not ending until Monday…
At last she whispered, “Don’t you want to know about Kenzie?” She looked up.
Drake’s mouth worked as if his tongue pressed chewing gum against the back of his teeth, readying it for bubble blowing. It was that old nervous habit only Kenzie could still provoke into action.
Evidently Susan now possessed the same power.
He avoided eye contact for several silent moments. And then she knew he wasn’t going to ask about their daughter.
“Drake, I’m not tired because of last night’s lack of sleep or today’s wedding or even Kenzie’s news. I’ve been tired for a long time. I’m going back to the beach house tonight. For a little while.”
He slid his hands into his pockets and looked at her now, his face caved in on itself like a lost little boy’s expression.
“If it’s—” Drake screens every jot and tittle of what you do. The gospel according to Natalie cut off what she intended to say…If it’s all right with you. It didn’t matter if it was all right with him or not. She knew what she needed to do.
But she didn’t like this distance between them either. She began again, “If you’ll come too, tomorrow after church, or Monday, we can—”
“I told you I can’t come. I have two full weeks until my scheduled vacation time. It’s Easter season. If you can’t rest at home and come to grips with this, then go.” He spun on his heel and strode from the office.
She spun on her own heel and marched down the hall, pulling bobby pins from her hair and letting it fall to her shoulders.
He really was an infuriating man. She wondered why she hadn’t noticed before.